@peyts228 sheer willpower at this point, my shoulder is out of joint and my pelvis hurts but my back is okay most of the time. I think getting back into core workouts will probably help me fend off a lot of low back pain later on though. I should probably go see a chiropractor soon, I just hate them so much and most of them are complete idiots so I've been procrastinating.
@peyts228 I’m having a really hard time. My 2 year old is really heavy for his age and the main time I have to pick him up now is to haul him upstairs to his crib, and then get him up later. I’m really struggling to even do that, especially on days when he puts up a fuss. It’s so hard to carry much weight now.
@annemarie96 yes, our stairs are killing me! My 2yo is in PT for some mild motor delays, and he can go up stairs but not down them yet. Stairs and the changing table are now my dreaded enemies.
@peyts228 yeah, I didn’t grow up with stairs and I hate this! I will never buy a two story house if I have any say in it and my husband thinks I’m so dramatic. 🤣 But I put off doing anything that requires me to go up the stairs.
@annemarie96 Our last home was two stories and when we sold it I told my husband I will never buy another two story house again and thankfully he agreed.. the house we bought in March has all living spaces on one story thank goodness! We have a basement but I have no need to go down there. My only use for it is to throw Amazon boxes down there for my husband to break down lol
@francesgs ah, I’m not alone in my drama! 🤣 When you’re using every bit of your energy just to try to get food in your belly and your kids and keep everyone semi-clean, etc. it just really makes a difference. I don’t have any motivation to spare for walking up stairs 20 times a day. 😫
Has anyone been told to take a baby aspirin because they are AMA (I’m 36)? It seems odd to me considering that I’ve had two pregnancies without any blood pressure issues. Supposedly I’m high risk for preeclampsia because of GD and being older, but I had GD the other times so the only thing that has changed is being over 35…
@peyts228 Yeah, mine tends to be lower too and none of the doctors I’ve seen so far have mentioned it, until the NP today. I think I’ll double check with my actual OB and MFM and see what they say.
@pttomato my midwife told me I should be taking it due to me having an autoimmune disorder and I didn't have pre-eclampsia with my last child. I actually have been hesitant to even start the aspirin because my blood pressure has been stable thus far and has never been high and I'm very anti taking anything while pregnant so I just don't know how I feel about it
@pttomato I am taking baby aspirin! The doc recommended it because I’m over 35 and for no other reason. She said it’s a new recommendation. I saw my PCP for a yearly checkup and she was surprised by the aspirin regimen but didn’t advise me to stop taking it.
This is my first kiddo, so I’m just following any and all doc recommendations.
The aspirin thing honestly surprises me because it was definitely not recommended in 2020 with the pandemic because we knew enough back then to know that taking it made covid worse and caused a bunch of unpleasant side effects. I wonder if they were all debunked later. Turmeric capsules were recommended in my pregnancy instead and only because I'd had a stillbirth, not a history of preeclampsia or anything. If I was recommended taking something again I'd probably opt for tumeric again instead of taking meds if I didn't need them.
Traveling this summer…I had really wanted to do a camping trip in July this summer but I don’t think I can handle a 6+ hour drive with a newborn, so that one is definitely not happening. We were also planning on flying out for my cousin’s wedding in the beginning of August+visiting friends (we used to live there). I can’t decide if flying with a 7 year old, 4 year old and 1-2 month old is doable or crazy, lol.
@pttomato - Ihear you on the camping! My wife and I were searching out glamping options for us in July. We might just decide that the price is worth it compared to our usual rustic style of pitch a tent in the woods and eat oatmeal over a backpacking stove. But it'll be an adjustment for sure!
@pttomato so my kids both *hated* the car as newborns/babies, but would have done just fine on a flight! I personally think newborns are easy compared to say, an 8-9 month old. My oldest will also be 7 by August, and I'd say he's been a breeze to travel with since he was about 3-3.5. Of course it's so individual to your kids, but I wouldn't be too terrified to take a flight with those ages! A long drive though, I would not 😂 again, just because my kids hate the car as babies.
Maybe this is a question specific to me, but any other LGBTQ+ folks in here? And any dealing with body dysmorphia or just feeling so not at home in your pregnant body?
I think I said this, but I'm usually a men's button down shirt and khaki pants kind of person and this was the first week back at work from holiday break (I'm a teacher) where none of my old clothes fit me. I end up having to be much more informal (think preggo jeans and a stretchy casual top) to teach in order to avoid dresses all together and it feels so not me. The preggo "work wear" is too formal AND also still too feminine at the same time. I love my body for the work that it's doing, but some days I feel such a disconnect between my gender identity and the clothes I'm in for the next 5 months. I guess I'm just asking if anyone else can relate?
@thescarletmom Yeah, mine also screamed in the car, and DS never, ever slept more than 30 mins total in the car so I know I can’t do the long drive. Maybe we’ll go somewhere else close.
My 7 year old is pretty easy to fly with, the 4 year old is ok, except that he gets really homesick, and the baby shouldn’t be too hard. I do worry about getting sick. DS was hospitalized with RSV at 6 weeks. On the other hand the baby’s highest risk for getting that is from the older kids who pick it up from everyday life stuff. IDK.
@monkey_mcfee that sounds so hard. Being fully transparent, I'm married to a man but I'm not straight. I don't usually struggle with any body dysmorphia during pregnancy because on the spectrum of gender identity, I feel fairly cisgendered. But I don't tend to dress overly feminine or wear dresses/skirts. This is my first pregnancy where I have worked in an environment where the higher level of professional dress is required, and it's forced me into clothing choices that made me feel pretty out of body and uncomfortable at times. It's a tricky thing to deal with, and I'm sorry that you're going through that. I think we can appreciate our bodies for the work of growing a baby and still deeply struggle with the way it affects how we move through the world. 🩶
Is your bump showing part of what makes you feel uncomfortable in your clothes or is it the style of clothing? I've seen some maternity chambray/button down tops, and maybe you could pair those with some maternity slacks or khakis to feel more yourself?
It's the style of clothing. I'm actually ok with the clothing choices I have for everyday hangout wear and I love wearing more form fitting clothing that allows my belly to show. I think in some ways I like being a role model for "this is what a pregnant lesbian looks like" (I'm out everywhere and realize I super lucky in that regard). It's just the professional work attire I'm still getting used to. I don't look any less dressy than some of my colleagues, I just feel less formal for my taste. All of the maternity slacks or khakis I've found so far are ankle length which, fine I guess, but they don't pair well with the boots I tend to wear (think Doc Martens) and they look like high waders lol. I do have some maternity button downs, but need to grow into them first, right now they're too big and definitely look like I'm wearing maternity clothing, they make me look frumpy.
Le sigh, it's 5 more months. And I have to say, pull on maternity pants are super comfortable haha!
@monkey_mcfee just validating that maternity clothes trend towards femme-presenting, and it sucks to have your choices for how you dress limited. Plus, the awkward stage where our old clothes are too tight but our maternity clothes are too loose is hitting right now. Hoping you find a way to rock your bump while feeling like you as your pregnancy progresses!
@monkey_mcfee also just here to say I'm sorry for what you're going through and how you're feeling. I don't have any good suggestions but I bet you're still rocking the hell out of your outfits no matter what. I do get some of that body dysmorphia in a bit of a different way, but had worked really hard to be in the best shape of my life before my wedding (in September). I was really proud of how consistent I was at the gym, eating, etc and felt incredible. Now looking at my changing body is a huge struggle for me and not being able to wear the clothing I felt so confident in a few months ago. Very different but I do know that it's a struggle and we are here for you!!
@pttomato I'm pro traveling with kids! We are taking a trip to Mexico when kiddo number 2 will be 7 months and kid number 1 will be 8. I was always a firm believer of starting kids young with traveling lol. To each their own but I always enjoy the experience even if the travel isn't perfect!
Thanks everyone! Today was better because it's flannel Friday around here and I can rock jeans, a basic maternity T and an oversized flannel. Heck yeah! But seriously, I appreciate the kind words of solidarity.
@pttomato@hitcj4687 I realized right after saying that I wouldn't go for a long drive with baby, that we *are* planning to drive to my sister's house four hours away between the baby being born in June and DS1 going back to school in August. So 🤦♀️ but definitely agree that traveling with kids is good! We haven't ever flown *with* our kids (and I was nearly 17 before I ever did) but we have taken long road trips with them all before they turned one. My only plan to keep baby calm is to sit in the backseat with them and nurse in the carseat. Or hope they fall asleep 🤞 DS1 would sleep in the car if the timing was right, but DS2 would rarely.
@thescarletmom starting when reese was 4 months old I was doing solo trips with him that were a 6 hour drive. Honestly it wasn't bad. We made frequent stops but he did good and I talked to him and sang to him and he did fine. By time he was 11 months he had been on his first flight, and did great and then I did a road trip with him and my brother (14 hours) when he was almost 2. He's always done very well and I totally get its not that way for everyone, but I have to imagine traveling with number 2 will be even easier because I'll have reese in the back seat with him and I'll actually have a supportive partner this time around lol so I'm not all alone
My daughter has always been a great car traveler.. when she was 5 we went on her first flight it was 6 hours and it was a little frustrating but we made it through. Last time we went on a 6 hour flight she was 9 and pretty much slept the whole time. This baby will probably be flying much earlier since my mom can’t fly anymore. Already stressing about taking a baby on a flight.
I flew with the two older kids (then 6 and 3.5) across the country this summer by myself (with bonus cancelled flight!) and it was fine. DD flew the first time at 3 months and that was fine. I took DS camping the first time when he was 2 months, although it was only an hour drive. I think the thing that gives me pause is that if we go to this wedding the baby may not even be 2 months old yet which makes me a little nervous.
@thescarletmom we booked a beach trip (3.5 hours away) when this LO will be about 5/6 weeks. I am slightly terrified. BUT I will be on leave and we are big on our family vacations every summer. So, we're going to make it work.
TTC History:
Started dating DH 2006 . Married 2015
TTC July 2015-November 2015
BFP November 2015 Baby boy born August 2016
Oops BFP February 2021 MMC March 2021
Back on BC for a year to decide what we want to do.
@hitcj4687 both of my babies cried to the point of silently screaming/choking when in the car until ~ 1 year 😭 No matter how long the car ride. Even 15 minutes to the grocery store tested DS2s patience too much. DS2 had a harder time than DS1, and I genuinely have PTSD from the number of times I'd be stuck in traffic and convinced he was going to choke to death behind me. DS1 was mostly cool if someone was in the back with him or we were driving while he was sleeping, but if those things couldn't happen he freaked. DS2, there was no comforting him without just pulling over and taking him out, except the rare occasions he would calm down enough to let me nurse him in his seat, if DH or someone else was driving. It was terrible. DS1 has tolerated road trips pretty well since about age 1.5-2, but DS2 had a hard time with our 4 hour drive to Omaha in September at 2.5. To be fair to him, he was sick, so maybe he'd normally do okay! But I get extremely anxious when my babies cry in the car and I feel like I can't *do* anything. So we usually avoid long car trips until they're at least 1 or we can drive through the middle of the night. Maybe this baby will tolerate the car better though! Who knows.
@thescarletmom that's awful!! Im sorry it was like that and so traumatic! Every child is so different and some kids just do not tolerate travel/car rides! I don't blame you for not wanting to travel with them if you could avoid it! I'm so glad they're better about it now. Maybe this baby will tolerate it better like you said!
@hitcj4687 honestly fingers crossed 😂The boys were mostly very, very chill as babies, the car was our one major struggle. It would be nice to have one baby who didn't think I was trying to torture them when we went anywhere. Especially because we would like to visit family and take weekend trips here and there without worrying the car would distress them so much.
@thescarletmom kids don't care what's on our agendas lmao they just do their own thing. This third baby will be your good traveler! I'm really looking forward to finding out what you're having. I'm still set on a third boy for you. There may be this slight feeling it could be a girl. But I'm still 90% sure it's a boy 😂
@hitcj4687 two weeks and you'll all be hearing about it! I still feel so conflicted and uncertain. I thought I'd have some sort of gut feeling by now! I've wanted to buy baby things this week but have told myself to just wait until we find out the sex, in case I would make slightly different color or pattern choices. Ugh!! Just want to know right now haha
@monkey_mcfee this popped up for me the other day and I thought of you but didn't remember to link it till I caught up on this thread, I hope they launch their clothing line in time for you to enjoy it this pregnancy! I'm femme to my core and I wish everyone had the access to feel good clothing that I'm privileged to enjoy 🥺 https://www.butchbasix.com/collections/alternity
Not sure if this has been discussed before but what is everyone's take on coffee? If you were a coffee drinker before, have you given it up completely or do you still allow yourself the allotted two cups a day?
I still have at least one cup most days. Sometimes (rarely) two. I have seen a lot floating around about people giving it up completely. Just curious what most of us are doing.
TTC History:
Started dating DH 2006 . Married 2015
TTC July 2015-November 2015
BFP November 2015 Baby boy born August 2016
Oops BFP February 2021 MMC March 2021
Back on BC for a year to decide what we want to do.
Re: The great big question thread
I'm AMA (35) and high risk (previous GD+another condition.)
I have not been told to take baby aspirin. My OB is very low-intervention, and my BP trends low to begin with 🤷♀️
I think I said this, but I'm usually a men's button down shirt and khaki pants kind of person and this was the first week back at work from holiday break (I'm a teacher) where none of my old clothes fit me. I end up having to be much more informal (think preggo jeans and a stretchy casual top) to teach in order to avoid dresses all together and it feels so not me. The preggo "work wear" is too formal AND also still too feminine at the same time. I love my body for the work that it's doing, but some days I feel such a disconnect between my gender identity and the clothes I'm in for the next 5 months. I guess I'm just asking if anyone else can relate?
Le sigh, it's 5 more months. And I have to say, pull on maternity pants are super comfortable haha!
TTC July 2015-November 2015
Baby boy born August 2016
Oops BFP February 2021
MMC March 2021
Back on BC for a year to decide what we want to do.
TTC Since March 2022
MMC June 2022
BFP September 2022 - Due June 2023!
I'm femme to my core and I wish everyone had the access to feel good clothing that I'm privileged to enjoy 🥺
https://www.butchbasix.com/collections/alternity
I still have at least one cup most days. Sometimes (rarely) two. I have seen a lot floating around about people giving it up completely. Just curious what most of us are doing.
TTC July 2015-November 2015
Baby boy born August 2016
Oops BFP February 2021
MMC March 2021
Back on BC for a year to decide what we want to do.
TTC Since March 2022
MMC June 2022
BFP September 2022 - Due June 2023!