Flame-Free Friday Confessions 4.23 — The Bump
Trying to Get Pregnant

Flame-Free Friday Confessions 4.23

keikilovekeikilove member
edited April 2021 in Trying to Get Pregnant
*FFFC: Not guaranteed to be flame-free🔥

Re: Flame-Free Friday Confessions 4.23

  • @boymama2018 What is it about TTC that makes you feel like your pressuring men?  Any other time it is the other way around, amiright?! haha. 

    I say I'm going to bed then lay in my bed in peace scrolling tiktok for an hour. 
    TTC History:
    Started dating DH 2006 . Married 2015

    TTC July 2015-November 2015
    BFP November 2015
    Baby boy born August 2016

    Oops BFP February 2021
    MMC March 2021

    Back on BC for a year to decide what we want to do.

    TTC Since March 2022
    MMC June 2022

    BFP September 2022 - Due June 2023!

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  • boymama2018boymama2018 member
    edited April 2021
    @ReadyForaB RIGHT. I fear performance anxiety like the plague. Trying to keep things fun and easy. Men can't handle the amount of stress we can honestly, we are built so different emotionally lol. Women are truly amazing. He made the first move so it might have worked! o:)
  • I also feel like cis men have a hard time understanding that the sex drive of people who menstruate is going to be (more) cyclical because of the hormones driving our menstrual cycles. Meanwhile, people who don't menstruate usually have a daily ebb and flow of testosterone, which makes their sex drive appear more constant, or higher.

    Our partners likely pay less attention to the nature of our sex drive when we aren't actively TTC, so it probably feels like pressure to them. I've had this conversation with my spouse about how I do, actually, pretty much want sex around the same amount every month, but of course he's paying more attention to it right now when part of the reason for it is for me to get pregnant. Also, our sex life has ebbed and flowed over the course of our relationship. It's not necessarily going to lessen the pressure now that either of us may feel, but it's kind of reassuring to remember that it changes because we change, and life's situations change, etc. etc. I do try to initiate sex at least once (maybe twice) outside of my fertile window, mostly because it helps me relax about sex during the fertile window too. 

    All that said, @boymama2018, I like your non-verbal sign. I think those are great, too! That's totally a low-key way to open the conversation, ha. :) 
  • bows22bows22 member
    edited April 2021
    @boymama2018 DH recently told me he knows that once he sees the pee sticks out that it’s time so I guess that’s our secret signal too

    @daisy0322 I hate all of the acronyms for sex. I used to think HIO meant “hit it out” and was mortified that I’d been saying “hump it out” for a year. I mostly just say “have sex” now haha 
  • @bows22 omg i thought it was hit it out too lol 
  • @inthewoods23 Wait, it's not "penis in vagina" ...  :open_mouth:
  • boymama2018boymama2018 member
    edited April 2021
    @beakay8 oh yes, I plan on initiating outside of the fertile window! We were benched for the last 3 months due to MTX. He doesn't like condoms and I didn't want to be on BC so we just abstained. But now that we are back in action that is definitely a goal of mine. 

    @bows22 we may be onto something! They seem to be very observant in the bathroom. haha

    @daisy0322 Yes, I can totally relate.
  • @fifilala516 YES my mother is the worst culprit in this. I know she means well, she struggled with IF and IVF when it was experimental for over a decade to have just me, but that means she should understand that the unsolicited advice is not great.

  • @acleverusername I am THE SAME. MH, very direct, I appreciate it: "Do you want to have sex?" Meanwhile, me: What ridiculous way can I phrase the question "Do you want to have sex?" Me, turned on by the direct approach; MH turned on/relaxed by absurdity; also, it's hilarious to ask "Do you want to stick it in me?" and it's never *not* been funny to both of us in the 14 years we've been having sex together lolol 
  • @beakay8 100% that it'll never stop being funny. 🤣 I'm a 13 yr old trapped in a body of a 37 year old. 
    TTC History
    Me: 38, MH: 37 | Met 02/2009 | Started Dating 08/2017 | Married 02/02/2020
    TTC #1 since 02/2020
    2009 | Dx PCOS; likely a misdiagnosis
    07/14/20 | Dx Hashimoto's Thyroditis
    07/21/20 | 1st RE appointment
    07/2120 - 08/20/20 | so much testing; no signs of PCOS
    08/20/20 | Dx Unexplained; AMA
    09/08/20 | IUI #1 Clomid + Trigger + Prometrium | BFN
    09/30/20 | Urology consult; more testing required
    10/2020 | Clomid + OPK + TI + Prometrium | BFN
    10/26/2020 | Starting 2nd IUI cycle, with Letrazole and with a new RE / different clinic
    11/03/2020 | New Dx "poor egg quality"; IUI cancelled in favor of Trigger + TI + Prometrium | BFN
    11/26/2020 | Combo IUI (Clomid + Menopur) + Trigger + Prometrium | BFN
    12/20/2020 | Combo IUI (Clomid + Gonal-F) + Trigger | IUI Cancelled due to thin lining; TI only | BFN
    01/14/2021 | Combo IUI (Letrazole + Menopur) + Trigger | BFN
    02/06/2021 | Switched to a new RE (TEW) ; trying naturally until we complete additional testing 
    03/14/2021 | Hybrid Double IUI, with Zymot (Letrazole, Gonal-F) + Trigger + Endometrin | Ovulated 4 mature eggs but still a BFN ☹️
    04/07/2021 | Natural cycle while we regroup | BFN
    04/09/2021 | Employer announces fertility benefits starting 05/01/2021! | Search for a new doctor who accepts insurance
    05/10/2021 | New RE consult & plan for IVF
    05/13/2021 | Mid-luteal IVF cycle #1 interrupted; had to get cancer genetic screening done to make sure I didn't have the same SDHA gene mutation as MH. 
    06/10/2021 | Aygestin priming IVF cycle #1; opted to Cx after 9 days of stims since only 5-6/12 follicles responded
    07/26/2021 | Attempt #2 at IVF cycle #1 (mid-luteal start): 8 retrieved, 8 MII, 6 fert (1 PN3), 3 Day 5 & 6 blasts: 3AA, 3AA, 6AB; 3 euploid
    08/09/2021 | Rest cycle / unmedicated TTC | Shockingly, a BFP! EDD: 5/25/202 | CP at 4w4d
    09/23/2021 | IVF cycle #2 (mid-luteal start): 14 retrieved, 13 MII, 11 fert, 5 Day 5 & 6 blasts: 2 x 3AA, 2 x 3AB, 3BB; 2 euploid
    11/12/2021 | IVF cycle #3 (mid-luteal start): cancelled due to ovaries being on vacation
    12/20/2021 | Rest cycle / unmedicated TTC + Pregmune Immunology Testing; BFN
    01/22/2022 | Rest cycle / unmedicated TTC + understanding uncovered immunological issues; BFN
    02/18/2022 | Mock transfer cycle! ERA, ReceptivaDx, EMMA/ALICE; start Prednisone to address NK activity
    03/16/2022 | Final, "Hail Mary" super-ovulation + TI cycle before FET; BFP! EDD: 12/21/2022 | MMC 05/08/2022
    05/20/2022 | D&C; recovering... 
    06/21/2022 | Trying naturally until October 2022
    07/21/2022 | BFP! EDD 04/02/2023

  • @inthewoods23 there's something extra hot about sneaky quiet sex xD some of the hottest sex I've had was as a teenager sneaking around and trying to be quiet so my college roommate wouldn't hear or notice.

    I guess this is related and kinda FFFC. I get a kick out of hearing people HIO, sometimes it just makes me think "oh good for them" and DH and I will smile at each other, but other times....other times it's like we just got a fast pass to humptown.
  • @chgilmore totally agree. I wish DH was more into doing that but he's just not a risk taker.

    @beakay8 thank you
    Bowing GIFs - Get the best GIF on GIPHY
    *TW* History:
    Me: 33 DH: 35 | Together since 2007 | Married July 2016

    TTC #1 since 7.2017
    Dx: low morph (1%), ANA positive, low decidualization score, high TSH and testosterone, histone antibodies

    IUI #1-3 all BFN
    IVF #1 | 6.11.19 | 24R, 17M, 15F, 6B, PGT-A tested - 5 normal, 3 girls & 2 boys
    FET #1 | 9.10.19 | BFN "I know you, but we've never met. I'm with you, but I don't know your name"
    RPL, Receptiva, & ERA testing | all normal/negative, recommended going on gluten and dairy free diet for next FET
    FET #2 | 3.31.20 | Opted to cancelled due to pandemic, continued diet and tried naturally over the summer
    2nd Opinion with another RE | 8.20.20 | Not immune to measles (received 1 dose); SA results similar to 2 years ago; decided to move forward with FET #2 redo at start of next cycle
    Surprise natural BFP! | 9.22.20 | MC 10.23.20 at 8 weeks
    TTCAL naturally | starting 11.22.20

    Initial consultation with Reproductive Immunologist | 9.14.21
    Decidualization score biopsy | 10.1.21 | abnormal - low score of 1; endometrial scratch recommended and progesterone supplementation
    Saline sono | 10.15.21 | normal
    Bloodwork | 10.21.21 high TSH, high testosterone, positive for anti-nuclear antibodies and histone antibodies
    BFP! | 11.3.21 | EDD 7.14.22 B) | biopsy provided same effect as endometrial scratch; added supplemental progesterone and estrogen, prednisone, levothyroxine, and MTX to maintain pregnancy
    DS born 7.19.22 after induction
  • @inthewoods23 i wish I could like that story more than once! That’s great .... when we were teenagers and probably up until 24 ish MH and I were ummm not fun to travel with- then my MIL decided to start waltzing in whenever because she was tired of it   😂 

    @kiki047 MH always finishes but sometimes he gets too excited and finishes super quick and I get salty af lol 
  • @inthewoods23 that story gave me LIFE

    DH went out to the driving range with a friend about an hour ago and I immediately ordered Chipotle.
  • @beakay8 Yes! Thank you!!! I’m dyslexic I have a degree and I’m working on a second will probably graduate with honors again this time. Grammar and spelling are not that  serious in day to day. People who act as if it’s life and death drive me bonkers 
    knottie7bc8467b6ac68efe[Deleted User]keikilove
  • We usually make copious use of the devil face emoji and the smirking one.
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