@ReadyForaB RIGHT. I fear performance anxiety like the plague. Trying to keep things fun and easy. Men can't handle the amount of stress we can honestly, we are built so different emotionally lol. Women are truly amazing. He made the first move so it might have worked!
I think the term “baby dance” is cringeworthy.... I mean clearly all of us are adults and definitely not virgins lol I feel like there has got to be a better way 🤣
@boymama2018 trying to get KU sex is never as fun in my opinion mainly because I feel like my head just isn’t in the game I’m preoccupied with fertility windows and OPKs. And like even though we both want a baby I’m the one who gets pregnant so it kind of feels like a favor lol
I also feel like cis men have a hard time understanding that the sex drive of people who menstruate is going to be (more) cyclical because of the hormones driving our menstrual cycles. Meanwhile, people who don't menstruate usually have a daily ebb and flow of testosterone, which makes their sex drive appear more constant, or higher.
Our partners likely pay less attention to the nature of our sex drive when we aren't actively TTC, so it probably feels like pressure to them. I've had this conversation with my spouse about how I do, actually, pretty much want sex around the same amount every month, but of course he's paying more attention to it right now when part of the reason for it is for me to get pregnant. Also, our sex life has ebbed and flowed over the course of our relationship. It's not necessarily going to lessen the pressure now that either of us may feel, but it's kind of reassuring to remember that it changes because we change, and life's situations change, etc. etc. I do try to initiate sex at least once (maybe twice) outside of my fertile window, mostly because it helps me relax about sex during the fertile window too.
All that said, @boymama2018, I like your non-verbal sign. I think those are great, too! That's totally a low-key way to open the conversation, ha.
@boymama2018 DH recently told me he knows that once he sees the pee sticks out that it’s time so I guess that’s our secret signal too
@daisy0322 I hate all of the acronyms for sex. I used to think HIO meant “hit it out” and was mortified that I’d been saying “hump it out” for a year. I mostly just say “have sex” now haha
I have a disliking towards the terms embabies or frosties. Just call them embryos lol.
I'm sure we can confess that at one time or another we all thought PNV was penis in vagina instead of prenatal vitamin haha
Related FFFC - DH has never had a problem finishing. Ever. Even if I've been pushy about hitting the EOD timing or making sure sex happens on O day. There have been times where we're just tired and aren't hitting the right spot on me (or I'm dry) so it takes a while, but we've never had to call it quits and call it a lost cause. I always feel so bad for the times anyone has said their husbands couldn't finish! DH doesn't have a high sex drive but if I ask and start arousing him, he's pretty much good to go to get the job done.
*TW* History:
Me: 34 DH: 36 | Together since 2007 | Married July 2016
TTC #1 since 7.2017 Dx: low morph (1%), ANA positive, low decidualization score, high TSH and testosterone, histone antibodies
IUI #1-3| all BFN IVF #1 | 6.11.19 | 24R, 17M, 15F, 6B, PGT-A tested - 5 normal, 3 girls & 2 boys FET #1 | 9.10.19 | BFN "I know you, but we've never met. I'm with you, but I don't know your name" RPL, Receptiva, & ERA testing | all normal/negative, recommended going on gluten and dairy free diet for next FET FET #2 | 3.31.20 | Opted to cancelled due to pandemic, continued diet and tried naturally over the summer 2nd Opinion with another RE | 8.20.20 | Not immune to measles (received 1 dose); SA results similar to 2 years ago; decided to move forward with FET #2 redo at start of next cycle Surprise natural BFP! | 9.22.20 | MC 10.23.20 at 8 weeks TTCAL naturally | starting 11.22.20 Initial consultation with Reproductive Immunologist | 9.14.21 Decidualization score biopsy | 10.1.21 | abnormal - low score of 1; endometrial scratch recommended and progesterone supplementation Saline sono | 10.15.21 | normal Bloodwork | 10.21.21 | high TSH, high testosterone, positive for anti-nuclear antibodies and histone antibodies, high protein S, multiple genetic mutations BFP! | 11.3.21 | EDD 7.14.22 | biopsy provided same effect as endometrial scratch; added supplemental progesterone and estrogen, prednisone, levothyroxine, and MTX Support to maintain pregnancy DS born 7.19.22 after induction
TTC #2 begins 6.2023 Consultation with RI | 6.6.23 Saline sono, endometritis biopsy, skin & eye check | all normal Labs | high TSH, Factor XIII mutation, high %CD56 Follow up | 8.8.23 | prescribed metformin, prednisone, plaquenil, and levothyroxine Repeat labs after 3 weeks on meds Follow up | 11.9.23 | Green light!, increase in prednisone, added lovenox Repeat labs in 8 weeks Follow up | 1.16.24 | Green light continues TTC put on pause
@beakay8 oh yes, I plan on initiating outside of the fertile window! We were benched for the last 3 months due to MTX. He doesn't like condoms and I didn't want to be on BC so we just abstained. But now that we are back in action that is definitely a goal of mine.
@bows22 we may be onto something! They seem to be very observant in the bathroom. haha
@fifilala516 YES my mother is the worst culprit in this. I know she means well, she struggled with IF and IVF when it was experimental for over a decade to have just me, but that means she should understand that the unsolicited advice is not great.
I religiously read the acronym dictionary when I first started posting; and in fact had both of them opened as separate tabs for like a month. LOL.
I too don't beat around the bush with MH. It's "do you want to stick it in later?" and "are you up for sexy times tonight?" LOL. The cruder the better IMHO.
My FFFC: I brush my teeth in the shower. And I will continue to do that cause I feel like I'm getting a better cleaning that way (I do floss before I hope in the shower though.)
@acleverusername I am THE SAME. MH, very direct, I appreciate it: "Do you want to have sex?" Meanwhile, me: What ridiculous way can I phrase the question "Do you want to have sex?" Me, turned on by the direct approach; MH turned on/relaxed by absurdity; also, it's hilarious to ask "Do you want to stick it in me?" and it's never *not* been funny to both of us in the 14 years we've been having sex together lolol
Another FFFC: I told my team that I'll be offline to do some heads down work because I had no meetings for 2 hours; I spent 1 of those 2 hours catching up on TB messages.
@acleverusername girl same haha. Yesterday I wasted a good hour in the morning writing up my whole NIAW post. Of course, I did answer the phones when it rang so I wasn't entirely unproductive with actual work.
After I open all my things for work in the morning, my next task is logging into my gmail, then creating an incognito window for facebook and TB . In the office I go back to only viewing that from my phone. It's just one of the many reasons why I really like WFH. I don't have to worry about someone seeing me on TB.
*TW* History:
Me: 34 DH: 36 | Together since 2007 | Married July 2016
TTC #1 since 7.2017 Dx: low morph (1%), ANA positive, low decidualization score, high TSH and testosterone, histone antibodies
IUI #1-3| all BFN IVF #1 | 6.11.19 | 24R, 17M, 15F, 6B, PGT-A tested - 5 normal, 3 girls & 2 boys FET #1 | 9.10.19 | BFN "I know you, but we've never met. I'm with you, but I don't know your name" RPL, Receptiva, & ERA testing | all normal/negative, recommended going on gluten and dairy free diet for next FET FET #2 | 3.31.20 | Opted to cancelled due to pandemic, continued diet and tried naturally over the summer 2nd Opinion with another RE | 8.20.20 | Not immune to measles (received 1 dose); SA results similar to 2 years ago; decided to move forward with FET #2 redo at start of next cycle Surprise natural BFP! | 9.22.20 | MC 10.23.20 at 8 weeks TTCAL naturally | starting 11.22.20 Initial consultation with Reproductive Immunologist | 9.14.21 Decidualization score biopsy | 10.1.21 | abnormal - low score of 1; endometrial scratch recommended and progesterone supplementation Saline sono | 10.15.21 | normal Bloodwork | 10.21.21 | high TSH, high testosterone, positive for anti-nuclear antibodies and histone antibodies, high protein S, multiple genetic mutations BFP! | 11.3.21 | EDD 7.14.22 | biopsy provided same effect as endometrial scratch; added supplemental progesterone and estrogen, prednisone, levothyroxine, and MTX Support to maintain pregnancy DS born 7.19.22 after induction
TTC #2 begins 6.2023 Consultation with RI | 6.6.23 Saline sono, endometritis biopsy, skin & eye check | all normal Labs | high TSH, Factor XIII mutation, high %CD56 Follow up | 8.8.23 | prescribed metformin, prednisone, plaquenil, and levothyroxine Repeat labs after 3 weeks on meds Follow up | 11.9.23 | Green light!, increase in prednisone, added lovenox Repeat labs in 8 weeks Follow up | 1.16.24 | Green light continues TTC put on pause
@inthewoods23 considering we're doing IVF and FW sex isn't even a thing anymore, I am absurdly jealous at YH's ability to finish every time. We have major performance anxiety issues over here. I have to give him a couple hours notice so we don't do something like take a melatonin too early, or eat too much at dinner, or <insert any other excuse here>, and even then it gets into his head too much. God, are we getting old or what? LOL.
My FFFC is that outside of FW I don't actually care if DH doesn't finish because it's less mess for me, but will never, ever tell him that
*edited to fix typo.
TTC History:
Me: 36 MH: 39, TTC since Dec 2017
Aug '18: PCOS dx
Nov '18: MH SA - 19mil
Dec '18-Mar '19: Letrozole + TI - all BFN
Apr '19: Letrozole + TI, - BFN. Repeat SA (27mil) & DNA fragmentation test (17%)
@kiki047 I definitely mention it earlier in the day since it's almost always PM sex. Most of the time the deed is done as long as I don't fall asleep before he finally gets to bed.
This is such a tangent, but it's a good story and it does end with an FFFC (kind of now that I've written it out? lol). FW sex reminded me of my conversation yesterday with my friend who's like "I can count on one hand the times we've had sex since I gave birth". Just hearing that so many people really are FW sex people and just aren't up for it PP makes me feel so much better because apparently my SIL and her fiance f*ck like rabbits and that's just.... how good can a relationship be if it's so FREAKING sexual?? Grosses me a out a bit. Anyway...
A couple years ago when we were on vacation with DH's family on a lake my SIL's BF (now fiance) joined us when they started dating. There has ALWAYS been the rule of no sex while we're there because it's a small cottage house and it's pretty easy to hear people talking in the kitchen/living room area from the bedrooms down the hallway and vice versa. These bedrooms either have hollow pocket doors, or in the case of our room, double folding doors like you might have for a closet. So yeah, privacy is basically just not being seen.
In the 2nd year SIL's fiance joined us, there happened to be an afternoon/evening where myself, FIL, and MIL were the only ones that decided go out on the boat and do some fishing. My MIL doesn't really fish so she's just chilling, reading in the boat or laying out (pontoon boat). She starts telling my FIL essentially that SIL and fiance had done it every single day last year and had a bet this year that they could/couldn't go the entire week without having sex and that my SIL lost that bet (she said they could but I guess she gave into his advances). Had something to do with the fact that SIL's birthday was the last day of the vacation. So hearing this, I am PISSED. We had done this vacation for almost 10 years at that point and every f*cking year DH and I have respected this rule. Also, no shame, but I'm loud AF sometimes that I hurt poor DH's ears haha so it was basically impossible for us not to be heard at the time. There never was a time where everyone else is out of the house that we wouldn't have to worry about noise.
I swear I'm getting to the FFFC part lol.
So we're back at the house from this short little fishing trip and I basically immediately tell DH (I think he had opted to nap instead of coming with) because, wouldn't you know it, that week of vacation was exactly my FW hence why I'm super pissed about hearing this story from my MIL. So we said f*ck this because the moment SIL gets a BF it's suddenly okay to be f*cking around. Had the quietest sex of our lives that very night and you know what, DH thought it was the HOTTEST sex we had ever had. Thank god for memory foam mattresses.
And that's how I became a lot quieter during sex
*TW* History:
Me: 34 DH: 36 | Together since 2007 | Married July 2016
TTC #1 since 7.2017 Dx: low morph (1%), ANA positive, low decidualization score, high TSH and testosterone, histone antibodies
IUI #1-3| all BFN IVF #1 | 6.11.19 | 24R, 17M, 15F, 6B, PGT-A tested - 5 normal, 3 girls & 2 boys FET #1 | 9.10.19 | BFN "I know you, but we've never met. I'm with you, but I don't know your name" RPL, Receptiva, & ERA testing | all normal/negative, recommended going on gluten and dairy free diet for next FET FET #2 | 3.31.20 | Opted to cancelled due to pandemic, continued diet and tried naturally over the summer 2nd Opinion with another RE | 8.20.20 | Not immune to measles (received 1 dose); SA results similar to 2 years ago; decided to move forward with FET #2 redo at start of next cycle Surprise natural BFP! | 9.22.20 | MC 10.23.20 at 8 weeks TTCAL naturally | starting 11.22.20 Initial consultation with Reproductive Immunologist | 9.14.21 Decidualization score biopsy | 10.1.21 | abnormal - low score of 1; endometrial scratch recommended and progesterone supplementation Saline sono | 10.15.21 | normal Bloodwork | 10.21.21 | high TSH, high testosterone, positive for anti-nuclear antibodies and histone antibodies, high protein S, multiple genetic mutations BFP! | 11.3.21 | EDD 7.14.22 | biopsy provided same effect as endometrial scratch; added supplemental progesterone and estrogen, prednisone, levothyroxine, and MTX Support to maintain pregnancy DS born 7.19.22 after induction
TTC #2 begins 6.2023 Consultation with RI | 6.6.23 Saline sono, endometritis biopsy, skin & eye check | all normal Labs | high TSH, Factor XIII mutation, high %CD56 Follow up | 8.8.23 | prescribed metformin, prednisone, plaquenil, and levothyroxine Repeat labs after 3 weeks on meds Follow up | 11.9.23 | Green light!, increase in prednisone, added lovenox Repeat labs in 8 weeks Follow up | 1.16.24 | Green light continues TTC put on pause
@inthewoods23 there's something extra hot about sneaky quiet sex xD some of the hottest sex I've had was as a teenager sneaking around and trying to be quiet so my college roommate wouldn't hear or notice.
I guess this is related and kinda FFFC. I get a kick out of hearing people HIO, sometimes it just makes me think "oh good for them" and DH and I will smile at each other, but other times....other times it's like we just got a fast pass to humptown.
Me: 34 DH: 36 | Together since 2007 | Married July 2016
TTC #1 since 7.2017 Dx: low morph (1%), ANA positive, low decidualization score, high TSH and testosterone, histone antibodies
IUI #1-3| all BFN IVF #1 | 6.11.19 | 24R, 17M, 15F, 6B, PGT-A tested - 5 normal, 3 girls & 2 boys FET #1 | 9.10.19 | BFN "I know you, but we've never met. I'm with you, but I don't know your name" RPL, Receptiva, & ERA testing | all normal/negative, recommended going on gluten and dairy free diet for next FET FET #2 | 3.31.20 | Opted to cancelled due to pandemic, continued diet and tried naturally over the summer 2nd Opinion with another RE | 8.20.20 | Not immune to measles (received 1 dose); SA results similar to 2 years ago; decided to move forward with FET #2 redo at start of next cycle Surprise natural BFP! | 9.22.20 | MC 10.23.20 at 8 weeks TTCAL naturally | starting 11.22.20 Initial consultation with Reproductive Immunologist | 9.14.21 Decidualization score biopsy | 10.1.21 | abnormal - low score of 1; endometrial scratch recommended and progesterone supplementation Saline sono | 10.15.21 | normal Bloodwork | 10.21.21 | high TSH, high testosterone, positive for anti-nuclear antibodies and histone antibodies, high protein S, multiple genetic mutations BFP! | 11.3.21 | EDD 7.14.22 | biopsy provided same effect as endometrial scratch; added supplemental progesterone and estrogen, prednisone, levothyroxine, and MTX Support to maintain pregnancy DS born 7.19.22 after induction
TTC #2 begins 6.2023 Consultation with RI | 6.6.23 Saline sono, endometritis biopsy, skin & eye check | all normal Labs | high TSH, Factor XIII mutation, high %CD56 Follow up | 8.8.23 | prescribed metformin, prednisone, plaquenil, and levothyroxine Repeat labs after 3 weeks on meds Follow up | 11.9.23 | Green light!, increase in prednisone, added lovenox Repeat labs in 8 weeks Follow up | 1.16.24 | Green light continues TTC put on pause
@inthewoods23 You’re such a great storyteller! Even though I remembered hearing this one once before, I couldn’t remember the details, and definitely didn’t remember the ending. I LOL-ed so loudly in public at your ‘happy ending’.🤣
@acleverusername Also LOL-ed at your “I’m in heads-down work” and your teen potty talk for sex! HA! It’s similarly direct ‘round these parts. Me: “You ready to ride, cowboy?” Or “Cowboy up. It’s go time.” MH is waaaaaay more romantic than I am, but after years of this timed sex he’s just like, “Yep. Can I finish my show first?” 😆😆😆 Aaaahhh, the truth about TTC.
@daisy0322 I’m with you on the “BD” being cringeworthy. But now I just use it or HIO so I can type fast. I never say it out loud—gross. Also, ditto to your thoughts about sex during FW. I try to make it interesting or sexy, but usually I’m waiting in bed all lame like this:
@inthewoods23 & @kiki047 MH is the first person I’ve been with who has the problem of sometimes “not finishing”. It’s only happened a handful of times over the past few years, but still. I had fair warning that this might be an issue because once, when we’d been dating awhile, he was lying on the bed and I was standing above him twirling my sexy panties in the air like, “Hellooooo, let’s do this!”💃🏼 🥳 And he was drunkenly laughing and apologizing, saying he’d had too much wine at dinner and needed to sleep. 😳That happened one other time when we were dating where he couldn’t finish for the same reason. Later he told me he has a blood disorder that makes things difficult if he consumes too much alcohol. Also, he’s more than a decade older than me, so there may be that too.
My FFFC: If anyone says “make love” it turns my stomach. In my 20s I broke up w a boyfriend partially because he used this phrase only— it made me sick and so turned me off to him. Also, because he was 9 years older than me and that seemed soooo old to be 34 hahaha.
*I feel like this week’s FFFC is suggesting that we could use an After Dark thread soon...
My other FFFC is that I grew up being corrected to use very proper English. I knowingly make mistakes on this forum all the time but post my improper sentences anyway. For example, when I just wrote that my boyfriend “was 9 years older than me” I could hear my mom saying “I.... he’s 9 years older than I... As in, ‘he’s 9 years older than I am’ or ‘he was 9 years older than I was’”. I also posted something to @acleverusername the other day that said something like “Do you get a discount on the cars that your company works with?” knowing full well it should’ve said “...a discount on the cars with which you work?” Or “....with which your company works?” But nobody speaks like that anymore so I just post all my improper statements and then let it bother me for days.😆😅 We’ve had quite a few English majors come through this board so I always wonder what they think...
@inthewoods23 i wish I could like that story more than once! That’s great .... when we were teenagers and probably up until 24 ish MH and I were ummm not fun to travel with- then my MIL decided to start waltzing in whenever because she was tired of it 😂
@kiki047 MH always finishes but sometimes he gets too excited and finishes super quick and I get salty af lol
@keikilove I'm an editor and bothered 0% by non "proper" English or writing. No one needs the soap box but the short version is "proper" is bullshit and fake. Writing and communication are all about audience and message; informal & casual language usage isn't wrong or improper, esp. on a casual internet forum. 🙂
@beakay8 Yes! Thank you!!! I’m dyslexic I have a degree and I’m working on a second will probably graduate with honors again this time. Grammar and spelling are not that serious in day to day. People who act as if it’s life and death drive me bonkers
I HATE the term "make love." Ew ew ew. So gross. DH and I are very crude and immature. One of us will just basically ask the other, "wanna [blank]?" And yep.
keikilove
member
Re: Flame-Free Friday Confessions 4.23
I say I'm going to bed then lay in my bed in peace scrolling tiktok for an hour.
TTC July 2015-November 2015
Baby boy born August 2016
Oops BFP February 2021
MMC March 2021
Back on BC for a year to decide what we want to do.
TTC Since March 2022
MMC June 2022
BFP September 2022 - Due June 2023!
@boymama2018 trying to get KU sex is never as fun in my opinion mainly because I feel like my head just isn’t in the game I’m preoccupied with fertility windows and OPKs. And like even though we both want a baby I’m the one who gets pregnant so it kind of feels like a favor lol
Our partners likely pay less attention to the nature of our sex drive when we aren't actively TTC, so it probably feels like pressure to them. I've had this conversation with my spouse about how I do, actually, pretty much want sex around the same amount every month, but of course he's paying more attention to it right now when part of the reason for it is for me to get pregnant. Also, our sex life has ebbed and flowed over the course of our relationship. It's not necessarily going to lessen the pressure now that either of us may feel, but it's kind of reassuring to remember that it changes because we change, and life's situations change, etc. etc. I do try to initiate sex at least once (maybe twice) outside of my fertile window, mostly because it helps me relax about sex during the fertile window too.
All that said, @boymama2018, I like your non-verbal sign. I think those are great, too! That's totally a low-key way to open the conversation, ha.
@daisy0322 I hate all of the acronyms for sex. I used to think HIO meant “hit it out” and was mortified that I’d been saying “hump it out” for a year. I mostly just say “have sex” now haha
I'm sure we can confess that at one time or another we all thought PNV was penis in vagina instead of prenatal vitamin haha
Related FFFC - DH has never had a problem finishing. Ever. Even if I've been pushy about hitting the EOD timing or making sure sex happens on O day. There have been times where we're just tired and aren't hitting the right spot on me (or I'm dry) so it takes a while, but we've never had to call it quits and call it a lost cause. I always feel so bad for the times anyone has said their husbands couldn't finish! DH doesn't have a high sex drive but if I ask and start arousing him, he's pretty much good to go to get the job done.
TTC #1 since 7.2017
Dx: low morph (1%), ANA positive, low decidualization score, high TSH and testosterone, histone antibodies
IUI #1-3 | all BFN
IVF #1 | 6.11.19 | 24R, 17M, 15F, 6B, PGT-A tested - 5 normal, 3 girls & 2 boys
FET #1 | 9.10.19 | BFN "I know you, but we've never met. I'm with you, but I don't know your name"
RPL, Receptiva, & ERA testing | all normal/negative, recommended going on gluten and dairy free diet for next FET
FET #2 | 3.31.20 | Opted to cancelled due to pandemic, continued diet and tried naturally over the summer
2nd Opinion with another RE | 8.20.20 | Not immune to measles (received 1 dose); SA results similar to 2 years ago; decided to move forward with FET #2 redo at start of next cycle
Surprise natural BFP! | 9.22.20 | MC 10.23.20 at 8 weeks
TTCAL naturally | starting 11.22.20
Initial consultation with Reproductive Immunologist | 9.14.21
Decidualization score biopsy | 10.1.21 | abnormal - low score of 1; endometrial scratch recommended and progesterone supplementation
Saline sono | 10.15.21 | normal
Bloodwork | 10.21.21 | high TSH, high testosterone, positive for anti-nuclear antibodies and histone antibodies, high protein S, multiple genetic mutations
BFP! | 11.3.21 | EDD 7.14.22
DS born 7.19.22 after induction
TTC #2 begins 6.2023
Consultation with RI | 6.6.23
Saline sono, endometritis biopsy, skin & eye check | all normal
Labs | high TSH, Factor XIII mutation, high %CD56
Follow up | 8.8.23 | prescribed metformin, prednisone, plaquenil, and levothyroxine
Repeat labs after 3 weeks on meds
Follow up | 11.9.23 | Green light!, increase in prednisone, added lovenox
Repeat labs in 8 weeks
Follow up | 1.16.24 | Green light continues
TTC put on pause
@bows22 we may be onto something! They seem to be very observant in the bathroom. haha
@daisy0322 Yes, I can totally relate.
I too don't beat around the bush with MH. It's "do you want to stick it in later?" and "are you up for sexy times tonight?" LOL. The cruder the better IMHO.
My FFFC: I brush my teeth in the shower. And I will continue to do that cause I feel like I'm getting a better cleaning that way (I do floss before I hope in the shower though.)
TTC#2
TTC #2 ... preparing as of March 2024
TTC #1
TTC #1 02/2020 - 07/2022
2009 | Dx PCOS; likely a misdiagnosis
07/14/20 | Dx Hashimoto's Thyroditis
07/21/20 | 1st RE appointment
07/2120 - 08/20/20 | so much testing; no signs of PCOS
08/20/20 | Dx Unexplained; AMA
09/08/20 | IUI #1 Clomid + Trigger + Prometrium | BFN
09/30/20 | Urology consult; more testing required
10/2020 | Clomid + OPK + TI + Prometrium | BFN
10/26/2020 | Starting 2nd IUI cycle, with Letrazole and with a new RE / different clinic
11/03/2020 | New Dx "poor egg quality"; IUI cancelled in favor of Trigger + TI + Prometrium | BFN
11/26/2020 | Combo IUI (Clomid + Menopur) + Trigger + Prometrium | BFN
12/20/2020 | Combo IUI (Clomid + Gonal-F) + Trigger | IUI Cancelled due to thin lining; TI only | BFN
01/14/2021 | Combo IUI (Letrazole + Menopur) + Trigger | BFN
02/06/2021 | Switched to a new RE (TEW) ; trying naturally until we complete additional testing
03/14/2021 | Hybrid Double IUI, with Zymot (Letrazole, Gonal-F) + Trigger + Endometrin | Ovulated 4 mature eggs but still a BFN ☹️
04/07/2021 | Natural cycle while we regroup | BFN
04/09/2021 | Employer announces fertility benefits starting 05/01/2021! | Search for a new doctor who accepts insurance
05/10/2021 | New RE consult & plan for IVF
05/13/2021 | Mid-luteal IVF cycle #1 interrupted; had to get cancer genetic screening done to make sure I didn't have the same SDHA gene mutation as MH.
06/10/2021 | Aygestin priming IVF cycle #1; opted to Cx after 9 days of stims since only 5-6/12 follicles responded
07/26/2021 | Attempt #2 at IVF cycle #1 (mid-luteal start): 8 retrieved, 8 MII, 6 fert (1 PN3), 3 Day 5 & 6 blasts: 3AA, 3AA, 6AB; 3 euploid
08/09/2021 | Rest cycle / unmedicated TTC | Shockingly, a BFP! EDD: 5/25/202 | CP at 4w4d
09/23/2021 | IVF cycle #2 (mid-luteal start): 14 retrieved, 13 MII, 11 fert, 5 Day 5 & 6 blasts: 2 x 3AA, 2 x 3AB, 3BB; 2 euploid
11/12/2021 | IVF cycle #3 (mid-luteal start): cancelled due to ovaries being on vacation
12/20/2021 | Rest cycle / unmedicated TTC + Pregmune Immunology Testing; BFN
01/22/2022 | Rest cycle / unmedicated TTC + understanding uncovered immunological issues; BFN
02/18/2022 | Mock transfer cycle! ERA, ReceptivaDx, EMMA/ALICE; start Prednisone to address NK activity
03/16/2022 | Final, "Hail Mary" super-ovulation + TI cycle before FET; BFP! EDD: 12/21/2022 | MMC 05/08/2022
05/20/2022 | D&C; recovering...
06/21/2022 | Trying naturally until October 2022
07/21/2022 | BFP! EDD 04/02/2023; 👦🏼 born on 4/5/2023
TTC#2
TTC #2 ... preparing as of March 2024
TTC #1
TTC #1 02/2020 - 07/2022
2009 | Dx PCOS; likely a misdiagnosis
07/14/20 | Dx Hashimoto's Thyroditis
07/21/20 | 1st RE appointment
07/2120 - 08/20/20 | so much testing; no signs of PCOS
08/20/20 | Dx Unexplained; AMA
09/08/20 | IUI #1 Clomid + Trigger + Prometrium | BFN
09/30/20 | Urology consult; more testing required
10/2020 | Clomid + OPK + TI + Prometrium | BFN
10/26/2020 | Starting 2nd IUI cycle, with Letrazole and with a new RE / different clinic
11/03/2020 | New Dx "poor egg quality"; IUI cancelled in favor of Trigger + TI + Prometrium | BFN
11/26/2020 | Combo IUI (Clomid + Menopur) + Trigger + Prometrium | BFN
12/20/2020 | Combo IUI (Clomid + Gonal-F) + Trigger | IUI Cancelled due to thin lining; TI only | BFN
01/14/2021 | Combo IUI (Letrazole + Menopur) + Trigger | BFN
02/06/2021 | Switched to a new RE (TEW) ; trying naturally until we complete additional testing
03/14/2021 | Hybrid Double IUI, with Zymot (Letrazole, Gonal-F) + Trigger + Endometrin | Ovulated 4 mature eggs but still a BFN ☹️
04/07/2021 | Natural cycle while we regroup | BFN
04/09/2021 | Employer announces fertility benefits starting 05/01/2021! | Search for a new doctor who accepts insurance
05/10/2021 | New RE consult & plan for IVF
05/13/2021 | Mid-luteal IVF cycle #1 interrupted; had to get cancer genetic screening done to make sure I didn't have the same SDHA gene mutation as MH.
06/10/2021 | Aygestin priming IVF cycle #1; opted to Cx after 9 days of stims since only 5-6/12 follicles responded
07/26/2021 | Attempt #2 at IVF cycle #1 (mid-luteal start): 8 retrieved, 8 MII, 6 fert (1 PN3), 3 Day 5 & 6 blasts: 3AA, 3AA, 6AB; 3 euploid
08/09/2021 | Rest cycle / unmedicated TTC | Shockingly, a BFP! EDD: 5/25/202 | CP at 4w4d
09/23/2021 | IVF cycle #2 (mid-luteal start): 14 retrieved, 13 MII, 11 fert, 5 Day 5 & 6 blasts: 2 x 3AA, 2 x 3AB, 3BB; 2 euploid
11/12/2021 | IVF cycle #3 (mid-luteal start): cancelled due to ovaries being on vacation
12/20/2021 | Rest cycle / unmedicated TTC + Pregmune Immunology Testing; BFN
01/22/2022 | Rest cycle / unmedicated TTC + understanding uncovered immunological issues; BFN
02/18/2022 | Mock transfer cycle! ERA, ReceptivaDx, EMMA/ALICE; start Prednisone to address NK activity
03/16/2022 | Final, "Hail Mary" super-ovulation + TI cycle before FET; BFP! EDD: 12/21/2022 | MMC 05/08/2022
05/20/2022 | D&C; recovering...
06/21/2022 | Trying naturally until October 2022
07/21/2022 | BFP! EDD 04/02/2023; 👦🏼 born on 4/5/2023
TTC#2
TTC #2 ... preparing as of March 2024
TTC #1
TTC #1 02/2020 - 07/2022
2009 | Dx PCOS; likely a misdiagnosis
07/14/20 | Dx Hashimoto's Thyroditis
07/21/20 | 1st RE appointment
07/2120 - 08/20/20 | so much testing; no signs of PCOS
08/20/20 | Dx Unexplained; AMA
09/08/20 | IUI #1 Clomid + Trigger + Prometrium | BFN
09/30/20 | Urology consult; more testing required
10/2020 | Clomid + OPK + TI + Prometrium | BFN
10/26/2020 | Starting 2nd IUI cycle, with Letrazole and with a new RE / different clinic
11/03/2020 | New Dx "poor egg quality"; IUI cancelled in favor of Trigger + TI + Prometrium | BFN
11/26/2020 | Combo IUI (Clomid + Menopur) + Trigger + Prometrium | BFN
12/20/2020 | Combo IUI (Clomid + Gonal-F) + Trigger | IUI Cancelled due to thin lining; TI only | BFN
01/14/2021 | Combo IUI (Letrazole + Menopur) + Trigger | BFN
02/06/2021 | Switched to a new RE (TEW) ; trying naturally until we complete additional testing
03/14/2021 | Hybrid Double IUI, with Zymot (Letrazole, Gonal-F) + Trigger + Endometrin | Ovulated 4 mature eggs but still a BFN ☹️
04/07/2021 | Natural cycle while we regroup | BFN
04/09/2021 | Employer announces fertility benefits starting 05/01/2021! | Search for a new doctor who accepts insurance
05/10/2021 | New RE consult & plan for IVF
05/13/2021 | Mid-luteal IVF cycle #1 interrupted; had to get cancer genetic screening done to make sure I didn't have the same SDHA gene mutation as MH.
06/10/2021 | Aygestin priming IVF cycle #1; opted to Cx after 9 days of stims since only 5-6/12 follicles responded
07/26/2021 | Attempt #2 at IVF cycle #1 (mid-luteal start): 8 retrieved, 8 MII, 6 fert (1 PN3), 3 Day 5 & 6 blasts: 3AA, 3AA, 6AB; 3 euploid
08/09/2021 | Rest cycle / unmedicated TTC | Shockingly, a BFP! EDD: 5/25/202 | CP at 4w4d
09/23/2021 | IVF cycle #2 (mid-luteal start): 14 retrieved, 13 MII, 11 fert, 5 Day 5 & 6 blasts: 2 x 3AA, 2 x 3AB, 3BB; 2 euploid
11/12/2021 | IVF cycle #3 (mid-luteal start): cancelled due to ovaries being on vacation
12/20/2021 | Rest cycle / unmedicated TTC + Pregmune Immunology Testing; BFN
01/22/2022 | Rest cycle / unmedicated TTC + understanding uncovered immunological issues; BFN
02/18/2022 | Mock transfer cycle! ERA, ReceptivaDx, EMMA/ALICE; start Prednisone to address NK activity
03/16/2022 | Final, "Hail Mary" super-ovulation + TI cycle before FET; BFP! EDD: 12/21/2022 | MMC 05/08/2022
05/20/2022 | D&C; recovering...
06/21/2022 | Trying naturally until October 2022
07/21/2022 | BFP! EDD 04/02/2023; 👦🏼 born on 4/5/2023
After I open all my things for work in the morning, my next task is logging into my gmail, then creating an incognito window for facebook and TB
TTC #1 since 7.2017
Dx: low morph (1%), ANA positive, low decidualization score, high TSH and testosterone, histone antibodies
IUI #1-3 | all BFN
IVF #1 | 6.11.19 | 24R, 17M, 15F, 6B, PGT-A tested - 5 normal, 3 girls & 2 boys
FET #1 | 9.10.19 | BFN "I know you, but we've never met. I'm with you, but I don't know your name"
RPL, Receptiva, & ERA testing | all normal/negative, recommended going on gluten and dairy free diet for next FET
FET #2 | 3.31.20 | Opted to cancelled due to pandemic, continued diet and tried naturally over the summer
2nd Opinion with another RE | 8.20.20 | Not immune to measles (received 1 dose); SA results similar to 2 years ago; decided to move forward with FET #2 redo at start of next cycle
Surprise natural BFP! | 9.22.20 | MC 10.23.20 at 8 weeks
TTCAL naturally | starting 11.22.20
Initial consultation with Reproductive Immunologist | 9.14.21
Decidualization score biopsy | 10.1.21 | abnormal - low score of 1; endometrial scratch recommended and progesterone supplementation
Saline sono | 10.15.21 | normal
Bloodwork | 10.21.21 | high TSH, high testosterone, positive for anti-nuclear antibodies and histone antibodies, high protein S, multiple genetic mutations
BFP! | 11.3.21 | EDD 7.14.22
DS born 7.19.22 after induction
TTC #2 begins 6.2023
Consultation with RI | 6.6.23
Saline sono, endometritis biopsy, skin & eye check | all normal
Labs | high TSH, Factor XIII mutation, high %CD56
Follow up | 8.8.23 | prescribed metformin, prednisone, plaquenil, and levothyroxine
Repeat labs after 3 weeks on meds
Follow up | 11.9.23 | Green light!, increase in prednisone, added lovenox
Repeat labs in 8 weeks
Follow up | 1.16.24 | Green light continues
TTC put on pause
My FFFC is that outside of FW I don't actually care if DH doesn't finish because it's less mess for me, but will never, ever tell him that
*edited to fix typo.
TTC History:
Me: 36 MH: 39, TTC since Dec 2017
Aug '18: PCOS dx
Nov '18: MH SA - 19mil
Dec '18-Mar '19: Letrozole + TI - all BFN
Apr '19: Letrozole + TI, - BFN. Repeat SA (27mil) & DNA fragmentation test (17%)
Aug '19: Letrozole + HCG trigger + IUI + prog supp - BFN (MH: 16mil)
Sep '19: 2nd IUI, same protocol - BFN (MH: 16mil)
Dec '19: IVF #1 w/ICSI, PGT. 5 retrieved, 4 fertilized, 3 blasts, 3 PGT-A normal.
Mar '20: FET #1, perfect 5AA blast transferred. BFN.
Sept '20: FET #2, 5BB tsf. 9/18/20 BFP!! EDD: 5/27/21. MMC 11w
Feb ‘21: FET #3, last 6BB blast transferred. BFP, EDD 11/2/21. MC 5w3d.
May '21: IVF #2 w/ICSI, PGT. 8R, 7M, 6F, 6 blasts - 3AB, 3AB, 3BB, 4BB, 5BB, 6BA. Fresh tsf 5/13/21 - BFN.
June '21: PGT-A results = 3 abnormal, 1 low level mosaic. Referred to new REI, had consult with 2nd RE in between.
Sept '21: RPL, immune testing normal
Oct '21: IVF #3 w/IMSI, PGT. 33R, 26M, 23F, 9 blasts (7 day 6, 2 day 7). PGT-A = 5 normal, 1 mosaic
Dec '21: Positive for endometritis, RX Flagyl & Keflex
Jan '22: FET #5 - Kitchen sink immune/RIF protocol incl. PRP, intralipids, prednisone, medrol, nivestym, fragmin - CP
Feb '22: FET #6 - Kitchen sink immune/RIF protocol w/higher doses of pred & fragmin - BFN
Mar '22: Mock cycle for ERA - cancelled, repeat endometrial biopsy instead. Still positive for endometritis. RX ciprofloxacin & amoxicillin.
Apr '22: IVF #4 w/IMSI, PGT. 28R, 23M, 16F, 11 blasts. PGT-A = 6 normal.
June '22: FET #7 - Microdose lupron downreg w/kitchen sink immune/RIF protocol - double embryo transfer. BFN.
July '22: FET #8 - Mini stim w/Puregon + trigger, kitchen sink immune/RIF protocol. BFN.
Sep '22: Taking a break
Dec '22: Attempted abdominal myomectomy, fibroid too close to cervix and major blood vessels. Wasn't removed.
Feb '23: FET #9 - Modified natural w/baby asp, HCG trigger, PIO, PRP, Medrol, HCG wash, embryo glue - BFP!! EDD 11/11/23
This is such a tangent, but it's a good story and it does end with an FFFC (kind of now that I've written it out? lol). FW sex reminded me of my conversation yesterday with my friend who's like "I can count on one hand the times we've had sex since I gave birth". Just hearing that so many people really are FW sex people and just aren't up for it PP makes me feel so much better because apparently my SIL and her fiance f*ck like rabbits and that's just.... how good can a relationship be if it's so FREAKING sexual?? Grosses me a out a bit. Anyway...
A couple years ago when we were on vacation with DH's family on a lake my SIL's BF (now fiance) joined us when they started dating. There has ALWAYS been the rule of no sex while we're there because it's a small cottage house and it's pretty easy to hear people talking in the kitchen/living room area from the bedrooms down the hallway and vice versa. These bedrooms either have hollow pocket doors, or in the case of our room, double folding doors like you might have for a closet. So yeah, privacy is basically just not being seen.
In the 2nd year SIL's fiance joined us, there happened to be an afternoon/evening where myself, FIL, and MIL were the only ones that decided go out on the boat and do some fishing. My MIL doesn't really fish so she's just chilling, reading in the boat or laying out (pontoon boat). She starts telling my FIL essentially that SIL and fiance had done it every single day last year and had a bet this year that they could/couldn't go the entire week without having sex and that my SIL lost that bet (she said they could but I guess she gave into his advances). Had something to do with the fact that SIL's birthday was the last day of the vacation. So hearing this, I am PISSED. We had done this vacation for almost 10 years at that point and every f*cking year DH and I have respected this rule. Also, no shame, but I'm loud AF sometimes that I hurt poor DH's ears haha so it was basically impossible for us not to be heard at the time. There never was a time where everyone else is out of the house that we wouldn't have to worry about noise.
I swear I'm getting to the FFFC part lol.
So we're back at the house from this short little fishing trip and I basically immediately tell DH (I think he had opted to nap instead of coming with) because, wouldn't you know it, that week of vacation was exactly my FW hence why I'm super pissed about hearing this story from my MIL. So we said f*ck this because the moment SIL gets a BF it's suddenly okay to be f*cking around. Had the quietest sex of our lives that very night and you know what, DH thought it was the HOTTEST sex we had ever had. Thank god for memory foam mattresses.
And that's how I became a lot quieter during sex
TTC #1 since 7.2017
Dx: low morph (1%), ANA positive, low decidualization score, high TSH and testosterone, histone antibodies
IUI #1-3 | all BFN
IVF #1 | 6.11.19 | 24R, 17M, 15F, 6B, PGT-A tested - 5 normal, 3 girls & 2 boys
FET #1 | 9.10.19 | BFN "I know you, but we've never met. I'm with you, but I don't know your name"
RPL, Receptiva, & ERA testing | all normal/negative, recommended going on gluten and dairy free diet for next FET
FET #2 | 3.31.20 | Opted to cancelled due to pandemic, continued diet and tried naturally over the summer
2nd Opinion with another RE | 8.20.20 | Not immune to measles (received 1 dose); SA results similar to 2 years ago; decided to move forward with FET #2 redo at start of next cycle
Surprise natural BFP! | 9.22.20 | MC 10.23.20 at 8 weeks
TTCAL naturally | starting 11.22.20
Initial consultation with Reproductive Immunologist | 9.14.21
Decidualization score biopsy | 10.1.21 | abnormal - low score of 1; endometrial scratch recommended and progesterone supplementation
Saline sono | 10.15.21 | normal
Bloodwork | 10.21.21 | high TSH, high testosterone, positive for anti-nuclear antibodies and histone antibodies, high protein S, multiple genetic mutations
BFP! | 11.3.21 | EDD 7.14.22
DS born 7.19.22 after induction
TTC #2 begins 6.2023
Consultation with RI | 6.6.23
Saline sono, endometritis biopsy, skin & eye check | all normal
Labs | high TSH, Factor XIII mutation, high %CD56
Follow up | 8.8.23 | prescribed metformin, prednisone, plaquenil, and levothyroxine
Repeat labs after 3 weeks on meds
Follow up | 11.9.23 | Green light!, increase in prednisone, added lovenox
Repeat labs in 8 weeks
Follow up | 1.16.24 | Green light continues
TTC put on pause
I guess this is related and kinda FFFC. I get a kick out of hearing people HIO, sometimes it just makes me think "oh good for them" and DH and I will smile at each other, but other times....other times it's like we just got a fast pass to humptown.
@beakay8 thank you
TTC #1 since 7.2017
Dx: low morph (1%), ANA positive, low decidualization score, high TSH and testosterone, histone antibodies
IUI #1-3 | all BFN
IVF #1 | 6.11.19 | 24R, 17M, 15F, 6B, PGT-A tested - 5 normal, 3 girls & 2 boys
FET #1 | 9.10.19 | BFN "I know you, but we've never met. I'm with you, but I don't know your name"
RPL, Receptiva, & ERA testing | all normal/negative, recommended going on gluten and dairy free diet for next FET
FET #2 | 3.31.20 | Opted to cancelled due to pandemic, continued diet and tried naturally over the summer
2nd Opinion with another RE | 8.20.20 | Not immune to measles (received 1 dose); SA results similar to 2 years ago; decided to move forward with FET #2 redo at start of next cycle
Surprise natural BFP! | 9.22.20 | MC 10.23.20 at 8 weeks
TTCAL naturally | starting 11.22.20
Initial consultation with Reproductive Immunologist | 9.14.21
Decidualization score biopsy | 10.1.21 | abnormal - low score of 1; endometrial scratch recommended and progesterone supplementation
Saline sono | 10.15.21 | normal
Bloodwork | 10.21.21 | high TSH, high testosterone, positive for anti-nuclear antibodies and histone antibodies, high protein S, multiple genetic mutations
BFP! | 11.3.21 | EDD 7.14.22
DS born 7.19.22 after induction
TTC #2 begins 6.2023
Consultation with RI | 6.6.23
Saline sono, endometritis biopsy, skin & eye check | all normal
Labs | high TSH, Factor XIII mutation, high %CD56
Follow up | 8.8.23 | prescribed metformin, prednisone, plaquenil, and levothyroxine
Repeat labs after 3 weeks on meds
Follow up | 11.9.23 | Green light!, increase in prednisone, added lovenox
Repeat labs in 8 weeks
Follow up | 1.16.24 | Green light continues
TTC put on pause
@acleverusername Also LOL-ed at your “I’m in heads-down work” and your teen potty talk for sex! HA! It’s similarly direct ‘round these parts. Me: “You ready to ride, cowboy?” Or “Cowboy up. It’s go time.” MH is waaaaaay more romantic than I am, but after years of this timed sex he’s just like, “Yep. Can I finish my show first?” 😆😆😆 Aaaahhh, the truth about TTC.
@kiki047 MH always finishes but sometimes he gets too excited and finishes super quick and I get salty af lol
DH went out to the driving range with a friend about an hour ago and I immediately ordered Chipotle.