@OneRainDrop Yay!!!! I’m so glad you got to hear babys heartbeat and everything seemed ok. I hope it’s a bit reassuring, but I know you won’t feel at ease until you speak with the doc. They should just know and be more on top of following up with mamas in this type of situation. Leaving us in limbo like this is not fair. I truly feel for you.
I get to go in for an early US tomorrow for my bleeding. It’s at 5:30 at the hospital, so I will be in your exact situation of not knowing for awhile. I hate to even know I won’t know tomorrow. Seeing baby will be better tho. I’m also excited that since I’m going to the hospital, my husband gets to join. Otherwise he couldn’t be there until the 20 week scan.
@OneRainDrop I am so glad that you heard the heartbeat and saw it. That sucks that the tech wouldn't tell you, I know they are not supposed to tell you stuff. So maybe your tech was just playing by the rules. That's awful that you don't hear more sooner. My Dr. assistant called the same day as my US.
I hope that the call is soon and its good news. What was the heartbeat at?
Thank you so much, ladies! I know they’re really not allowed to say much, but I’ve always had ultrasound Techs that are more helpful than this. It’s just hard to wait for more info. And I really Am in so much pain it’s hard to keep my mind off of everything. I think also it’s mostly just giving me ptsd from my last loss. I had Bleeding, an ultrasound at 6w that showed everything was fine, heartbeat and measurements were great, then 5 weeks later founds our baby had passed around 7 weeks. I don’t want to get my hopes up for loss again, but also want to enjoy the pregnancy if everything is going to be ok!
@momofmiracles31889, how bad is your lower back pain?! I feel Like I have a pretty high pain tolerance and this is so brutal!!
@tingsmom, she didn’t tell me the heart rate, just showed it to me/let me hear it. I thought That was strange too.
@OneRainDrop This tech is so disappointing but still yay for seeing the heartbeat. Maybe the tech wasn't able to get the heartbeat, my tech told me sometimes its hard to measure the heartbeat at 6 weeks.
@Lyndsayem35 Good luck tomorrow! I am so happy that you finally have an appointment. I know it has been a long wait. I will be thinking of you tomorrow.
@steph-ann Good luck to you tomorrow too! I will be thinking of you, also jealous your hubby gets to go.
@OneRainDrop I wouldn’t say it’s excruciating, just pretty uncomfortable. Definitely call your doctor if you’re concerned! But I do tend to get low back aches with hormones (periods and pregnancy 🤷🏻♀️) I hope yours eases up a little!
I just had a small amount of tannish/brownish discharge on my liner and I know I had this with my son BUT I’m still freaking out of course bc it brings up PTSD from my losses. It’s so hard for me to see any color and not freak out. My ultrasound is tmw at 10:15 and I’m dreading going by myself and I was feeling pretty confident but there’s always that back of the mind what if there isn’t a heartbeat 😩
@momofmiracles31889, dang it! I’m so sorry you’re spotting. Why is it so hard not to freak out about that?! Good luck with your ultrasound tomorrow! I was SO bummed I had To go alone today but survived. You’re going to do great!! 🥰
@OneRainDrop thanks so much!! Ugh I know right?! It’s like we KNOW it can be completely normal and i am literally holding my living proof of that but the loss brain is still so strong and it just sends you right back to those terrible times! It’s like automatic defenses go up and quickly assume the worst! I told my husband often during my pregnancy with DS if only I was a medical professional and could have an ultrasound at home to check on baby as needed 🤣 although I’m sure that many checks wouldn’t be good for the baby anyway 🙈 with DS I had to go to a lot of appointments alone because of covid including the anatomy scan BUT I was fortunate to have DH with me in the beginning for all the early ultrasounds so this almost feels even harder since all our losses were early
Good news! The little one is measuring 6w3d (based on ovulation date I calculated 6w4d). I was able to see the HB on the monitor but I don’t know if she was able to calculate BPM or not. The tech was friendly and printed me out 4 pictures posted in US thread) I’m feeling hopeful because during my Sept 2020 MMC the baby was quite behind and then the heartbeat just stopped before the 10th week.
@momofmiracles31889 I hope your US goes well today and you get some piece of mind.
@steph-ann I hope your US goes well too and I’m so envious your husband gets to go!
FINALLY heard from my doctors office! They said everything looks great. Which is kind of shocking. I was 100% sure they’d tell me terrible news. They did say I have a “small separation” (subchorionic hematoma) on my right side, which is what has caused the bleeding. She said it can lead to miscarriage, but also could be totally fine. It’s the same thing I did have with my previous loss, so it’s just a waiting game now. They want me to come back in 2 weeks for my first prenatal appt with the OB and they’ll do another quick ultrasound at that appointment. Going to do my best to not worry about everything for the next 2 weeks! (easier said than done!)
@lyndsayem35 and @OneRainDrop I’m glad you ladies got good results today and will pray everything continues in that direction! I posted my good update in the ultrasound thread. Thankfully so far the spotting was just a one time incidence too!
@momofmiracles31889 I’m so happy for you. PGAL is so hard but when you get to see the HB that is such sweet relief. Yay! @OneRainDrop I’m so glad you were give good news. You’ll be in my thoughts the next few weeks. I hope the sch just resolves on its own and you can get some relief from the pain!
I just wanted to jump in real quick and give an update. I’m still struggling with the news and just taking the day to myself since my youngest is in school today. I had my US last night at the hospital. I am so thankful that my husband was able to come to the appointment with me. The tech would not tell me anything at all, even that she saw a baby, I couldn’t listen to the heartbeat if she saw one, no measurements and I could barely see the screen when laying down. I did notice instantly that their was two babies. My husband was trying to pay attention to what she was doing but didn’t really know what he was looking at it. When she was done I told her that I was not leaving until I got some kind of news. She was very nice and said she’d talk with the radiologist, have him do his report and see what she can tell me. She was gone for like 25 mins. My husband knew he saw twins but it looked like she couldn’t get the heartbeat on one of them. I was struggling with the news of twins and didn’t even comprehend what he was saying of one not having a heartbeat. I just kept repeating I don’t know how we are going to do it with twins and talking about our new life with twins. Even tho from the beginning of this pregnancy I just knew deep within me that I was having twins. He was like, I don’t think it’s good news. She got a heartbeat on one and kept going back to baby A and not getting anything. She finally came back in with pictures printed and gave us the news that baby A didn’t make it. The baby was only measuring a tiny difference behind baby B, so it likely happened late last week when my symptoms let up some and I had the bright red blood. The good news is Baby B is measuring right on time with a strong healthy heartbeat. This is all very hard to to comprehend and the emotions are all over the place. It’s tough. I don’t think I was strong enough for twins but this is def a very hard situation to be dealt. The OB office called on my way home, which was very nice it’s it was 7pm. She said I am calling about your twins, I just lost it again. Ugh!!! She was very sympathetic and offered me to come in later to do another heartbeat reading to make me feel comfortable.
Sorry if this is all over the place. I wanted to update but not feeling too well with the news at the moment.
Edited to add, baby B is measuring 8weeks5days and heartbeat of 169. My mind goes to another girl but who knows. I am 8.6 today so spot on.
@steph-ann I am so sorry for the loss of your sweet baby! Prayers for you and your family. I imagine it must be such a mix of emotions finding out in one day that you have a thriving baby in there and one that didn’t make it. Give yourself lots of grace to process!
@steph-ann oh wow! First off good job advocating for yourself and your littles ones. I am so glad you told them you wouldn’t leave. Second I am so sorry for your loss and so happy that baby b is doing well.
Ugh so I am stressing out! 7+3 today and I went to the bathroom and had a decent amount of pink blood on my liner and then red when I wiped 😢 obviously assuming the worse bc I never had this much blood with my son, but I talked to the doctor and she said it can be very normal and my tests have all been good so she’s not over concerned but to just monitor it overnight and call tmw to check in. She said if it continues they can see me sooner than Friday for my next scan. UGH why can’t this ever be easy haha I so want to hold onto hope for my sweet baby but it’s so hard for my defenses not to go up with my history and assume it’s already over
Thank you ladies for all your support and I’m very happy to read that everyone else is doing well too! Besides all the crazy pregnancy symptoms!! I loved looking at the US thread.
This last week has been tough but I’m ok. There’s just so many emotions. I had my first doc visit today and I was a bit nervous and I guess I was looking upset. First of all they cancelled my US that was supposed to happen before apt, but no one told me. So I was early and drank all that water for nothing. The doc asked why I was looking upset and she questioned why I’d be so upset with the twin loss. She said most women don’t get upset with a loss they didn’t even know they had and are actually happy and relieved it won’t be twins. I was kind of taken back by her approach. I get what she’s trying to say, and she was nice about it. Not rude at all but it’s just insensitive statements I guess. I just knew in my soul that I was pregnant with twins. And ya sure, if I had the choice I would never choose twins and certainly did not want to have twins this pregnancy, but it still doesn’t hurt any less when I see that little baby in my belly on the screen that didn’t make it. It’s tough. She did a bedside US and the other baby is looking good and healthy. Wiggling it’s arms and legs. I could see the heartbeat flicker.
@momofmiracles31889 I am so sorry that you are going through this. I know how hard it is to see red blood and think it has to be over or something is wrong. I have had red blood with this pregnancy and my last. I know it is hard to stay positive when you see that but it can be perfectly normal to have red blood. I am not sure what helps you but what helps me is to say over and over again that I am grateful for this healthy pregnancy and I am grateful for this healthy baby. I say it over and over until the self doubt or negative talk in my head has died down.
I truly hope everything is okay with this baby and am sending you a virtual hug.
@momofmiracles31889 I am thinking of you and sending good baby vibes your way. I know it’s not easy but try to think positive thoughts and sleep tonight. I was up peeing so much the night I saw blood but I kept the lights off and didn’t look, because I knew if I did and saw something I wouldn’t sleep another minute. It was def tough but so much better that I got some rest. My heart is aching for you. Keep us posted. I am so sorry you are going through this.
@tingsmom and @steph-ann thank you so much for the support and well wishes. It’s seriously so hard being in limbo! I honestly felt shocked when I saw the blood because we had just had a good heartbeat scan this week and I thought that we found the “fix” for our losses with the lovenox shots that helped my son make it here so im just like mentally what is going on. But I know there’s not always a simple fix and I also shouldn’t assume the worst or give up on this baby yet. Ah it’s such a mind game! @tingsmom do you mind sharing what your bleeding experience was like, it helps to know you had red blood too, how long did it last? Also thank you both for the good tips! And @steph-ann I’m so glad your baby is still looking strong and healthy but I am SO sorry you had to deal with that response to your loss. That is completely insensitive and unprofessional. Regardless of how other women have responded you have every right to grieve your sweet baby!! My husband and I were not planning this pregnancy.... I have a 2.5yo and 6 month old and was so overwhelmed when I found out! But that doesn’t mean I won’t be absolutely devastated if we don’t get to bring this baby home. People seriously need to keep their mouths shut if they don’t have something kind and empathetic to say in response to a loss
@momofmiracles31889, I'm so sorry for the stress of seeing blood. I hope you are able to take it easy the next couple days and see your healthy babe on an ultrasound soon. ❤
@momofmiracles31889 in my first pregnancy I only had red blood, I want to see I was 8 or 9 weeks pregnant. I was traveling for work and went out to dinner with my coworkers. I got back from dinner and had a lot of a red blood. So much that it had gone through my jeans, like a size of a quarter. I called my Dr the next day and they scheduled an US and it was a SCH. It repaired on its own and I had a healthy baby boy.
So far in this pregnancy I have had some light bleeding week 4 and then again around week 5. Week 5 was when I saw red blood. I had a very small amount on my undies Friday night and then started on and off pink and brown until Tuesday night, by then I had already had one appointment and an US scheduled for Wed. That night I wiped and had red blood, I kept going to the bathroom and seeing more red blood. Unlike @steph-ann I was still looking and I did not sleep well. I convinced myself something was wrong and started crying to my husband who promised he would come with me and just wait in the car. It's really weird I didn't feel like everything was going to be okay until right before the US. I have another SCH and ovarian cysts on both ovaries. I know that was a lot of details so sorry if it was TMI but I hope it helps.
Also @steph-ann I am sorry your Dr was insensitive. I would have been upset as well, what your feeling is completely normal. You loss a child.
I'm 7 weeks in and haven't had spotting since what I believe was implantation bleeding, until this weekend. I had slight spotting (pink) immediately after having sex. It did not persist throughout the day so I'm attributing it to hopefully just cervical bruising? Everywhere I read it says this is normal but i couldn't help but feel anxious. First pregnancy here and US not until next week. 🙏 all turns out okay
Thank you @tingsmom it does help to hear your story as it sounds like a similar amount to what I have- really hoping to see a healthy baby and an SCH today! But mentally prepared for the other possibility as well, as much as you can be
Thank you @tingsmom@steph-ann@chindimples04 and @galentine! Good news! Baby measured 7 weeks 3 days right on track and heartbeat 146!! Also no sign of a bleed in my uterus so they don’t know why I’m having some bleeding but said since baby looks good it’s most likely nothing to worry about as long as it continues to not be a ton! Phew! It seems to be slowing. That red blood is just terrifying! So thankful as I was fully prepared for bad news today since since of our losses we had heartbeat in 6th week and none in 7th. So we’ve now officially passed our loss milestones again 🙌🏻
@momofmiracles31889 Oh that is wonderful news!!!! I’m so excited and relieved for you. I hope the bleeding continues to taper off. I also wanted to say you must be super human to deal with all the emotions and pregnancy symptoms while tending to an infant and toddler. I really hope your 6mo sleeps well. I am dreading that first year cause it’s so hard, and I could never imagine being pregnant with how I feel now while dealing with the first year. It’s terribly hard as is and I have a 6yo and 17yo that are pretty self sufficient. Hats off to you! Yay for that healthy baby!
@steph-ann thanks so much for all the kind words! I’m certainly not superhuman - just have a lot of super helpers 🤣 my mom is retired and helps me out every weekday bless her heart and my husband is amazing and works from home, helps how he can and does like everything in the evenings when I’m super sick. I mostly just hold or bottle feed my baby or read my toddler books. I am so thankful for all the help and really can’t complain! Also my baby is a WONDERFUL sleeper- he STTN until 5am ish atleast most nights and then my husband gets up with him (again he’s awesome). And I’m not breastfeeding which helps (I pumped for about 3 months and quit bc it was mentally draining me and I had tried so hard at breastfeeding but my baby boy just couldn’t latch well, I was pretty devastated and felt like a failure but now I see there was even purpose in that not working out)
Hi, everyone. I am new to this group, and I wasn't even going to join, but I really need a place to vent the stress/anxiety I'm going through, and I found this thread. I read every single one of the previous posts and my heart is with all of you so, so much.
I'm PGAL, after a MMC in Sept. 2020 and a loss in June 2017. (I have a son born in between, in May 2018.) Pregnancy after loss is so hard, and we really want this second (and final) baby. I'm struggling with 4 different things, all of which could be normal or could be bad signs.
1. First ultrasound at 6w2d measured only 5w5d with no fetal pole. That's well within the range of normal, but it was extremely disappointing not to see a heartbeat.
2. Second ultrasound at 7w2d measured 6w4d with just the faintest hint of a fetal pole, heartbeat, and crown rump. The good news was the change in between the ultrasounds; the bad news was that I still wasn't where I should have been. It's possible I'm *slightly* off on my dates, but only by ~max~ three days. So this was still within the possible realm of normal, but pushing it.
3. I have had only very faint pregnancy symptoms this time. In my two other pregnancies that lasted this long, I was ~sick~ by now. I have a few symptoms, and occasional nausea, but nothing major. I know that every pregnancy can be different, but it's hard not to freak out.
4. 36h ago I started spotting. Very faint amount, barely even getting on a liner, mostly just there when I wipe. I think it's dark-ish, but it's really hard to tell. I had an SCH on my first ultrasound, which appeared to be gone at my second ultrasound, so I don't think it's that? Again, could be normal, could be bad.
I go for my third (and definitive) ultrasound on Monday. I should be between 8-9 weeks, so if there's no heartbeat, that's it. This has been SOOO stressful. It's literally all I think about. With my MMC in the fall, I thought everything was totally fine and was blindsided at the 8w ultrasound. So my doc has been having me come in for these early u/s, which I appreciate, but it has turned into a source of incredible anxiety, tracking every little change and never getting fully good news. Both my husband and I have a borderline-trauma relationship with the doctor's office at this point.
Every issue I'm having can be explained away as normal. (Baby is a little slow getting going and I'm a few days off on my dates; I'm just not nauseous this time--yay!; spotting is from an SCH or something else benign.) But when I add them all together, it just feels like a really bad set of information. I'm sorry for the long message, and for introducing myself this way. I just really needed to get this all off my chest in a supportive place.
History (TW/loss/child):
7/2017 -- miscarriage at 6w 5/2018 -- DS born 3 days after due date, 8lb 4oz 9/2020 -- missed miscarriage at 9w / DNC 3/2021 -- miscarriage at 8w 7/2021 -- missed miscarriage at 8w / DNC 9/2021 -- IVF cycle #1 (FET 1/25/22)
Re: *TW* Spotting/Bleeding/Threatened Loss Support
I’ll be in the same situation tomorrow at 7:30: mine is at an imaging center but thankfully have an OB intake on the next day.
I hope that the call is soon and its good news. What was the heartbeat at?
@Lyndsayem35 Good luck tomorrow! I am so happy that you finally have an appointment. I know it has been a long wait. I will be thinking of you tomorrow.
@steph-ann Good luck to you tomorrow too! I will be thinking of you, also jealous your hubby gets to go.
I just had a small amount of tannish/brownish discharge on my liner and I know I had this with my son BUT I’m still freaking out of course bc it brings up PTSD from my losses. It’s so hard for me to see any color and not freak out. My ultrasound is tmw at 10:15 and I’m dreading going by myself and I was feeling pretty confident but there’s always that back of the mind what if there isn’t a heartbeat 😩
I was able to see the HB on the monitor but I don’t know if she was able to calculate BPM or not. The tech was friendly and printed me out 4 pictures posted in US thread)
I’m feeling hopeful because during my Sept 2020 MMC the baby was quite behind and then the heartbeat just stopped before the 10th week.
@momofmiracles31889 I hope your US goes well today and you get some piece of mind.
@steph-ann I hope your US goes well too and I’m so envious your husband gets to go!
FINALLY heard from my doctors office! They said everything looks great. Which is kind of shocking. I was 100% sure they’d tell me terrible news. They did say I have a “small separation” (subchorionic hematoma) on my right side, which is what has caused the bleeding. She said it can lead to miscarriage, but also could be totally fine. It’s the same thing I did have with my previous loss, so it’s just a waiting game now. They want me to come back in 2 weeks for my first prenatal appt with the OB and they’ll do another quick ultrasound at that appointment. Going to do my best to not worry about everything for the next 2 weeks! (easier said than done!)
@OneRainDrop I’m so glad you were give good news. You’ll be in my thoughts the next few weeks. I hope the sch just resolves on its own and you can get some relief from the pain!
I truly hope everything is okay with this baby and am sending you a virtual hug.
And @steph-ann I’m so glad your baby is still looking strong and healthy but I am SO sorry you had to deal with that response to your loss. That is completely insensitive and unprofessional. Regardless of how other women have responded you have every right to grieve your sweet baby!! My husband and I were not planning this pregnancy.... I have a 2.5yo and 6 month old and was so overwhelmed when I found out! But that doesn’t mean I won’t be absolutely devastated if we don’t get to bring this baby home. People seriously need to keep their mouths shut if they don’t have something kind and empathetic to say in response to a loss
Me: 26 DH: 27
TTC #1 | June '18-August '18 | DD | Born April 21, 2019 | Due May 10, 2019
TTC#2 | June '20-February '21 | DS | Due October 27, 2021
So far in this pregnancy I have had some light bleeding week 4 and then again around week 5. Week 5 was when I saw red blood. I had a very small amount on my undies Friday night and then started on and off pink and brown until Tuesday night, by then I had already had one appointment and an US scheduled for Wed. That night I wiped and had red blood, I kept going to the bathroom and seeing more red blood. Unlike @steph-ann I was still looking and I did not sleep well. I convinced myself something was wrong and started crying to my husband who promised he would come with me and just wait in the car. It's really weird I didn't feel like everything was going to be okay until right before the US. I have another SCH and ovarian cysts on both ovaries. I know that was a lot of details so sorry if it was TMI but I hope it helps.
Also @steph-ann I am sorry your Dr was insensitive. I would have been upset as well, what your feeling is completely normal. You loss a child.
I'm PGAL, after a MMC in Sept. 2020 and a loss in June 2017. (I have a son born in between, in May 2018.) Pregnancy after loss is so hard, and we really want this second (and final) baby. I'm struggling with 4 different things, all of which could be normal or could be bad signs.
1. First ultrasound at 6w2d measured only 5w5d with no fetal pole. That's well within the range of normal, but it was extremely disappointing not to see a heartbeat.
2. Second ultrasound at 7w2d measured 6w4d with just the faintest hint of a fetal pole, heartbeat, and crown rump. The good news was the change in between the ultrasounds; the bad news was that I still wasn't where I should have been. It's possible I'm *slightly* off on my dates, but only by ~max~ three days. So this was still within the possible realm of normal, but pushing it.
3. I have had only very faint pregnancy symptoms this time. In my two other pregnancies that lasted this long, I was ~sick~ by now. I have a few symptoms, and occasional nausea, but nothing major. I know that every pregnancy can be different, but it's hard not to freak out.
4. 36h ago I started spotting. Very faint amount, barely even getting on a liner, mostly just there when I wipe. I think it's dark-ish, but it's really hard to tell. I had an SCH on my first ultrasound, which appeared to be gone at my second ultrasound, so I don't think it's that? Again, could be normal, could be bad.
I go for my third (and definitive) ultrasound on Monday. I should be between 8-9 weeks, so if there's no heartbeat, that's it. This has been SOOO stressful. It's literally all I think about. With my MMC in the fall, I thought everything was totally fine and was blindsided at the 8w ultrasound. So my doc has been having me come in for these early u/s, which I appreciate, but it has turned into a source of incredible anxiety, tracking every little change and never getting fully good news. Both my husband and I have a borderline-trauma relationship with the doctor's office at this point.
Every issue I'm having can be explained away as normal. (Baby is a little slow getting going and I'm a few days off on my dates; I'm just not nauseous this time--yay!; spotting is from an SCH or something else benign.) But when I add them all together, it just feels like a really bad set of information. I'm sorry for the long message, and for introducing myself this way. I just really needed to get this all off my chest in a supportive place.
5/2018 -- DS born 3 days after due date, 8lb 4oz
9/2020 -- missed miscarriage at 9w / DNC
3/2021 -- miscarriage at 8w
7/2021 -- missed miscarriage at 8w / DNC
9/2021 -- IVF cycle #1 (FET 1/25/22)