IF Testing and Treatment w/o 8.24

emeraldduchess

This is a place for those of us who have already started TTC, but have started infertility testing and/or treatments. You can express your thoughts, feelings, and frustrations on infertility. TTC can be a long journey naturally, then add in the difficulties associated with infertility, and it becomes a whole new ball game. The road to infertility can be lonely, frustrating, and complicated, so let's make this a place where we can vent, ask questions, and support one another. Feel free to resurrect this thread at any point in the week if you have something to say. Treat this as an ongoing conversation. 

Diagnosis (if you've been): 

Status (WTO/TWW/TTA):

What are you doing this cycle? (Testing? Treatment?): 

How are things going?: 

Any questions?:

GTKY: What is your favorite way to treat and/or pamper yourself?

acleverusername

@emeraldduchess Anxiously awaiting news from you! Hoping, and praying, and sending positive vibes for a bountiful ER!

kpearse99

Hi friends!!!! I'm back!!! I'm sorry I was pretty MIA last week, I just needed time to really clear my head and gather all of my thoughts about everything that's been going on. I did read everyone's posts and kept up with you all though I can never fully "disappear"! 

@emeraldduchess GL today, friend!!!!

Diagnosis (if you've been): Secondary Unexplained IF

Status (WTO/TWW/TTA): WTO - (I think)

What are you doing this cycle? (Testing? Treatment?): PNV and NTNP.... all while still constantly thinking about TTC 

How are things going?: Better than the last few weeks with all that's been going on (non TTC related) but still just OK. Everything that's been weighing on me has really taken a tole and has been quite exhausting but I woke up today bright eyed and bushy tailed so here's hoping thinks are starting to look up!

In other news - I think I may have pulled my hamstring (again....well, last time, which was about 9 years ago, I tore my hamstring) and it's been quite uncomfortable. I'm hoping it settles on it's own and I don't need to make any appointments. 

Any questions?: n/a

GTKY: What is your favorite way to treat and/or pamper yourself? I don't pamper myself enough LOL so things like getting my hair done or a massage (like once or twice a year) are wonderful!! I do like getting manis and pedis too! Sometimes, when I am home alone, treating myself to an entire bag of popcorn and not having to share with anyone is a beautiful thing! 

keikilove

@kpearse99 Hugs, friend! Hope the short break was cathartic! 💓💓💓

@emeraldduchess Thinking of you this morning!!! 

misshelen86

@emeraldduchess Can’t wait to hear how your ER went! Hoping everything goes smoothly for you today!

@kpearse99 Glad you are back to your bright-eyed, bushy-tailed self! But sorry to hear that you hurt your hamstring again. Sounds like a great time to do something to pamper yourself since you don’t do it enough!

Diagnosis (if you've been): MFI

Status (WTO/TWW/TTA): WTO

What are you doing this cycle? (Testing? Treatment?): NTNP... IVF in 2 weeks! 

How are things going?: Great! I’ve been doing I really well since we decided on IVF. I’m feeling really excited and hopeful but still just a bit nervous about what our outcome will be. I’m also really enjoying this break from TTC and the lovely weather we’ve been having! One thing that kind of sucks right now is that I just found out my manager is leaving for another position... after I finally got up the nerve to tell her about IVF! So I’m not sure if the new manager will be as supportive but I guess I’ll just have to see what happens.

Any questions?: No

GTKY: What is your favorite way to treat and/or pamper yourself? I love going for massages (have one booked tomorrow!) or sitting outside in the sunshine with a good book.

akoros

Diagnosis (if you've been): AMA, RPL (unexplained)

Status (WTO/TWW/TTA): Got my period!!! As in, I *JUST* got my period, like two minutes ago. Yay!!! (never been so happy to see it) It'll probably last two weeks like last time, so I'll soon be irritated again, but for now so happy that my body seems to be doing its thing as it should.

What are you doing this cycle? (Testing? Treatment?): Going to start tracking ovulation again, and beyond that just going about it the natural way and get the timing right. 

How are things going?: Ok, super happy at the moment that my period came and I'm not sitting here stressing until October (that's when my MFM said they'd get concerned about Ashermans). Was in a funk over the weekend, for no particularly good reason. I mentioned it over in the TTCAL thread, but at my MFM appointment she said that she doesn't think Factor V Leiden caused the most recent issue, despite finding that I do have it. I kind of disagree with her reasoning, but mostly it caused my anxiety to spike back up about being "unexplained". 

Any questions?: None right now

GTKY: What is your favorite way to treat and/or pamper yourself? Massage and/or pedicure. A couple of times my husband has also gotten me a gift card to a local cafe/bookstore, so I'll go wander the store for a couple of hours, buy way too many books, and then buy myself a meal at the attached restaurant. This makes me miss our old neighborhood, all of the above (and more) was literally within a 10-minute walk. When my husband's away and I'm on my own for the night I've also been known to frequently make myself mac & cheese for dinner and then chill out with some wine and either a book or chick flick. 

kiki047

@emeraldduchess thinking about you today friend!! Hope everything goes smoothly and painlessly, and they get as many little eggies as possible!!! 

@kpearse99 Ouch to your hamstring, what did you doooo?

@misshelen86 bummer about your manager, she sounded really supportive. Hopefully the new one will have your back as well! Glad you're feeling good about moving on to IVF   we're all rooting for you too!!
@akoros Woooo for AF saving the day. Sorry your weekend was so blah, I hope this week is already looking up for you. That "unexplained" dx is so hard, and it's so easy to fall down that rabbithole of 'what-ifs' but you didn't cause your MC and none of this is your fault   you sound like you're in great hands and you're your own best advocate so this is a new cycle, and hopefully you're setting off on a better path to your THB. Hugs!

kpearse99

@misshelen86 Isn't not actively TTC so freeing?!?! I hope you enjoy that massage tomorrow, you deserve it! And I"m sorry to hear about your manager leaving, ugh! I'm sure all will work out though

@akoros Being in funks are the worst, especially when you don't even really know or understand why you're in one. I'm glad you're feeling better and happier now though!!

@kiki047 That GIF is spot on and hilarious! haha I honestly think it's from the extra workouts I've been doing (DH would 100% tell you that I've been pushing myself too hard, but I disagree haha). It's so weird though because I was so happy and thinking that the strength training and focus on my legs has actually made my hamstrings stronger but then last week my left one started really hurting, like even when I'm just sitting on the couch at the end of the day, and the pain and discomfort has been radiating to my left hip too. It feels really tight and restrictive like it needs to "pop" and that's how it felt so many years ago when I had scans done and saw the orthopedic. They said it was torn pretty badly and almost detached. It took several months of PT and a few weeks of steroids for it to finally feel better... For now I'll just keep rolling the back of my leg and under my butt check on the roller and stretching it out as much as I can, I guess.

kiki047

Diagnosis (if you've been):  PCOS, MFI

Status (WTO/TWW/TTA): WTO for FET prep

What are you doing this cycle? (Testing? Treatment?): Our FET has been booked for Tues Sept 8th! Yay! It feels like a long way off still but it gives us something to look forward to. 

How are things going?: Better. I'm a raging psycho on the estrace so this has been "fun" (god bless my saintly hubby, he somehow still loves me and I don't know why/how). Picked up our PIO on Saturday, which we didn't have to do last time because of a Canada-wide shortage. Kind of terrified of that, especially because my clinic doesn't give me a smaller injection needle so I'm using the giant mixing needle to do the shots too. But if @keikilove can do it, so can I!  

Any questions?: The instructions the clinic gave us for the PIO were horrible. I haven't googled it yet because I'm nervous and don't want to stress myself out but does anyone have any good resources for PIO tips/tricks? Particularly a diagram of where in my butt I need to stick this thing, and tips on doing your own injections? I did all my own stims but those were in my belly, this whole IM thing is freaking me out.  

GTKY: What is your favorite way to treat and/or pamper yourself? Traveling with MH. Time away together with just the two of us, enjoying good meals, quiet time with no work looming over our heads, I'm never more relaxed than when we can put physical space between us and the things that stress us out. But when all else fails, there's a spa near us that has like 11 different kinds of sauna 'rooms', massages, a restaurant, gym (not that I use that ), a pool, jacuzzi, etc. It's unisex so MH can come too and you pay a flat rate per 24hr admission period and it's honestly so magical. They have these huge recliners that double as beds and they'll bring you a duvet or pillows or will give you a massage right in the chair if you want. I'm worried they're not going to survive the pandemic because as much as they're allowed to re-open, most of the hot sauna rooms are closed so it's not worth it right now (otherwise I'd be there every weekend).

kpearse99

@kiki047 I know it feels far away but it's basically in 2 weeks!! It will be here before you know it.... I just your raging psycho-ness tames itself soon haha I agree, time away with DH (just as a couple) is the greatest thing!! I love that you and YH have that wonderful bond!!

emeraldduchess

Hi Ladies!
Thank you for all the love! I could definitely feel it as I headed into my retrieval this morning. Knowing that you were thinking of me means so much. 
I will come back later for my official check in and tags but I wanted to give you an update! First off, I cannot say enough about the care I received at the hospital. My anesthesia team was amazing, I was really anxious about getting an IV and they were SO sweet. I didn't feel a thing except a little burning when they put the sedatives into the IV. They referred to it as "spicy" which I thought was hilarious. 
When all was said and done, they got 29 eggs!

Not bad for these geriatric ovaries, eh?? Take THAT, "advanced maternal age"! I know we still need quality over quantity, so I am not doing cartwheels just yet. 
DH's swim team, on the other hand, didn't bring their A game today. His count was pretty low, which was shocking to us because at his SA last year he was WAY above normal and he had an excellent count at our IUI. But the surgeon assured me that this doesn't mean this cycle will be a bust, they're going to do ICSI instead of just letting his sperm wander around looking for the egg. We're cool with that.  
So that's where we are now. Over all I feel good. I'm pretty tired and DH is heading out to get me some Tylenol in case I need it later. Now it's time for a smoothie, Netflix, and another nap. 

kpearse99

@emeraldduchess I'd say you certainly earned that smoothie, netflix and a nap!!! Take it easy, girl!! What an amazing number of 29 eggs!!!! woohoo!!!!

keikilove

@emeraldduchess That’s an amazing number of eggs! Woohoo! Hope you get some rest, some food, & heal quickly.💗💗💗

gingermama29

@kpearse99 I'm glad to see you're feeling more yourself. I hope your hamstring is better!

@misshelen86 yay for IVF in 2 weeks. I'm sorry your manager is leaving. Hopefully your next one will be as supportive! 

@akoros glad AF finally showed for you. Mmmm mac & cheese with wine sounds fantastic.

@kiki047 the 8th will be here so quickly! Good luck with PIO! You can do it!

@emeraldduchess wow 29 eggs!!! That's amazing! Definitely enjoy some relaxation tonight!

Diagnosis (if you've been): PCOS

Status (WTO/TWW/TTA): I think TWW? Waiting for a another high temp to confirm O.

What are you doing this cycle? (Testing? Treatment?): trying naturally

How are things going?: I mentioned this on the dailies already but it's going here too. I met with my PCP about my anxiety this morning. It went really well and she was very open to receptive to my struggles with anxiety (and depression). She validated my feelings and understood given covid and the fact that I'm a teacher terrified to go back to school. She prescribed daily Zoloft but has also given me a supply of Xanax to take as needed to stave off panic attacks (if I don't get KU). I'm really happy that I went in today and advocated for my mental health. 

Any questions?: No

GTKY: What is your favorite way to treat and/or pamper yourself?
I've been pretty obsessed with Color Street and doing my nails. I honestly don't do a ton of self care so it's nice to have pretty nails regularly. 

legallykate

Don't have time for a full post today so just doing a drive-by to say woohoo to @emeraldduchess! Way to go ovaries! Hope you are resting and getting spoiled today

emeraldduchess

Diagnosis (if you've been): Unexplained IF, unexplained RPL, AMA, ovarian shenanigans

Status (WTO/TWW/TTA): n/a

What are you doing this cycle? (Testing? Treatment?): IVFstims/retrieval this cycle, then benched for a cycle or two until transfer (freezing and testing embryos). 

How are things going?: Feeling good after my retrieval! Whatever they gave me knocked me right out and I felt nothing. I was a little tipsy on the ride home, though. DH said I sounded like I do when I have a glass of wine on an empty stomach. I definitely wasn't walking straight on the way to the car, either. I'm definitely bloated but not as bad as I expected and I don't feel any pain. So now we just play the waiting game to hear about our embryos. 

Any questions?: Nope. I think I'm good! Calling the specialty pharmacy tomorrow to figure out what to do with all the leftover medication. I still have a Gonal-F pen, a box of Menopur and a few doses of Cetrotide left. 

GTKY: What is your favorite way to treat and/or pamper yourself? I wrote this question and I don't have a good answer! I rarely get pedicures and I don't like massages, so I will go with wine and a Netflix binge, or treating myself to some good quality nail polish. 

inthewoods23

@kpearse99 if you ask me, 1 hour massages are never long enough 😆

@misshelen86 that's a huge bummer your manager is leaving! Hope you new manager is just as understanding

@akoros woohoo AF 🤣 hoping things will be a little more normal for you this cycle and it's not crazy long!

@kiki047 on the plus side, the PIO will go in faster with the larger needle. Bless @keikilove's backside 🙌 for handling that like a champ before she found out the right away.

@emeraldduchess literally me reading 29 eggs! WHOA!

And I thought my 24 was fantastic. That's amazing! Hope lots of them are beautifully mature and ready for fertilization!

@gingermama29 I had a great appointment with my PCP too! She really understood my feelings, it was great.


Diagnosis (if you've been): unexplained, low morph

Status (WTO/TWW/TTA): TWW, likely WFAF

What are you doing this cycle? (Testing? Treatment?): natural, doing some testing again next cycle

How are things going?: WELL *TW*

Guess who got f*cking lapped by her own sister? I was so angry Saturday getting that text (due near my birthday no less!) that I screamed bloody murder in the house. I haven't responded to her message as of right now, but I will with something so bleh "ok cool" because how the hell else could I possibly feel about this??

In other news, saw my PCP and she prescribed Wellbutrin since I may have a whole combination of depression, anxiety, and ADD. She also suggested maybe having a psychiatrist evaluate me. I'm happy how it went. She also mentioned PMDD, and of things were less severe while on BC and honestly, I'm not really sure. It's possible. But wouldn't going on BC to help PMDD completely defeat my purpose of getting KU.

Any questions?: Anyone have experience with Wellbutrin? I know there's some debate over it being pregnancy safe.

GTKY: What is your favorite way to treat and/or pamper yourself? I like having DH brush my hair and plucking my eyebrows for me 😆 I wish I did facials or massages regularly, but that gets expensive fast!

emeraldduchess

@kpearse99 welcome back friend! I hope your brief break helped. I'm so sorry that you're world outside of TTC is so stressful at the moment. Hope your hamstring feels better! That's just what you need right now, huh? Glad you're feeling more like yourself today!

@misshelen86 I'm so excited for your treatment to start in 2 weeks! For me it wasn't nearly as complicated as I thought it would be. That's tough about your manager leaving, though. Hopefully her replacement will be approachable and willing to accommodate your treatment schedule!

@akoros glad your body seems to be doing what it should! I'm sorry you and your doc aren't seeing eye to eye on your test result and your recent loss. That would make me anxious, too. 

@kiki047 I am SO excited for your FET!! I hope the time flies by! That spa near you sounds amazing. I don't like massages but the jacuzzis and giant recliners would be heavenly! 

@gingermama29 I am so proud of you for advocating for yourself with your PCP. Being open and honest about your mental health takes a LOT of guts. Glad she validated your feelings and was supportive. 

emeraldduchess

@inthewoods23 that gif has me in stitches! I almost fell out of bed when they told me. 
I'm glad that you had a good talk with your PCP about your anxiety and the possibility of meds. 
As for the other thing you mentioned today...*TW*

I am so, so sorry you got that news about your sister lapping you. That sucks so much. Obviously it's not a competition but it's so unfair to see others have multiple babies in the time you're still trying for one. Scream all you want, feel how you need to feel. We get it. Every time I get a text alert from my SIL I am afraid that she'll tell us she's KU again. I hope that your sister will be sensitive to your feelings when she talks about it and shares things. 

inthewoods23

@emeraldduchess that number was totally unexpected! It always seems like those on that high of a dose of meds get so few, but I'm so happy that wasn't the case for you! Are you getting updates on day 3 and 5?

acleverusername

@kpearse99 missed you last week, but happy to hear the break did you well. Also sorry about your hamstring. That sounds pretty painful and I'm cringing as I write this. 

@misshelen86 enjoy your NTFP as you await your IVF cycle! I think I must have missed it... did you decide to go straight to IVF given YH post-wash sperm count at the IUI? 

@akoros Yay AF! I always chuckle at how heartily we celebrate something we usually don't want to show up. I'm sorry the call with MFM left you feeling anxious. As @kiki047said though... you did not cause your MC. Be gentle to your self. 💜

@kiki047 Sep 8! Wow... so soon! (Yet so far away!) Are you doing anything relaxing to try and counter the Estrace?I hope the PIO shot go well; that's the thing I fear most about IF treatments, if we ever get to them. 

@emeraldduchess

(besides that, same question as @inthewoods23 ... when is the next update?)

@gingermama29 C'mon high temp! 🤞🏻I said it in the dailies, but I'll say it again here: thanks for being transparent about how you're handing your mental health. 

@inthewoods23 What's the next steps for you? Are you continuing with the 2nd opinion RE? What's next there. As for *TW*

Gah! I am so sorry to hear that. Was she sensitive about the delivery of that information? Hugs to you. 

acleverusername

Diagnosis (if you've been): RE says it's "unexplained". NaPro called it Late Luteal Phase Defect. PCOS dx at age of 25 though; and some mild MFI in there too. 

Status (WTO/TWW/TTA): WFAF

What are you doing this cycle? (Testing? Treatment?): just received our IUI protocol for this cycle coming up; currently WFAF, wondering how long it'll take before she shows up. This had been my first cycle taking progesterone, so I have no idea how my body reacted to it. 

How are things going?: Had a bit of a mental breakdown yesterday; the fact that my body isn't doing the things it's supposed to be doing. I thought that I was mentally prepared for this -- given my shady menstrual history, I always knew something was "wrong". But I was still hoping for the best. And I've also been super open with my friends about our fertility journey, claiming that "I'm on a mission to educate / inform so that we can break the silos", and I realized that while I was "informing" my friends about where we are in the process, and the testing we're doing, and the costs associated, blah blah, I wasn't really sharing with them how it was making me feel. And the reality is that I feel like my body betrayed me. So, I had a bit of cry yesterday. Then talked w/ DH about it and he reminded me that during IUI orientation, they talked about free counseling resources. So, this morning I e-mailed the clinic asking how I can book myself in. 

I'm also nervous about not knowing when AF will show up. We still have to do consent form signing w/ the nurse, prior to starting treatment, but she was OOO today, and at this point I'm hoping she can get us booked in either for tomorrow or Wed but before AF shows up. Otherwise we might miss out on this cycle... 🙀

Any questions?: My protocol calls for 100mg of Clomid which I find is really high...is it not high? Also, the standard protocol is only 1 u/s on Day 10, but there's an * saying that additional u/s might be required. For those of you with IUI experience, was more than 1 u/s required? How big do follicles have to be when they trigger? Finally... has anyone had an IUI cancelled because of too many follicles? I think that's what I'm worried about the most. Oh, and do folks generally stop posting to dailies when IF treatment starts? I feel like posting to (especially) WTO might be irrelevant since O will be "fabricated".

GTKY: What is your favorite way to treat and/or pamper yourself? Oh man, definitely a day at a Scandinavian style spa (which I haven't come across in the US yet!) https://www.nordicvisitor.com/blog/nordic-spa-traditions/; must include champagne and assorted cheeses and a book. 

inthewoods23

@acleverusername the geothermal spas of Iceland was probably my favorite part of our honeymoon there! We didn't do much other than sit in the water, but it felt amazing! My next steps is to call when AF arrives. We'll redo the baseline BW and DH's SA to see how everything looks and then move into an IUI the following cycle. Now that I'm on medication, I want to give that some time to work before even attempting another FET. It likely wouldn't be for 2 months when I call the first clinic back anyway. Maybe longer with covid going on. My previous IUIs they had me come in for the first US on CD12. IUIs 2 and 3 had follicles ready that day (they like to see it at least 20mm) but my first one I had an additional US and triggered around my usual O date of CD17. That was with Letrozole. Based on the size (or sizes) at the first US, they'll calculate how many days it will be for the follicle(s) to grow to the required size and have you come back for another US. They typically grow 1-2mm a day so that 2nd US was scheduled for like, 3 days later or something. Don't quite remember. There's no rule that you shouldn't post to the dailies doing IF treatments. Some of us don't join in there, others do - whatever your preference is!

emeraldduchess

@inthewoods23 I responded pretty well to the letrozole when I did medicated cycles (to the point where they warned me during one cycles I could have high-order multiples). But since none of those cycles resulted in a BFP, I am concerned about egg/sperm quality. But I do know that the more eggs, the more likely we'll get a few good ones! Doing ICSI can only help, too. DH is feeling better about that now. His ego was a little bruised yesterday when I told him his sample wasn't the best. He wanted to call the IVF lab and request a "do-over". Pretty sure it doesn't work that way!

@acleverusername they said they'll call me this afternoon with an update about how many eggs fertilized and I assume we will continue to get updates on Day 3 and 5/6. We're going to freeze the embryos and have them biopsied because I am AMA and *TW* we have had 2 losses, one at 5 weeks and one CP. End TW* I know that there is a huge drop off between Days 1, 3, and 5, so I am prepared for that. If anyone follows Amy Schumer on Instagram, she wrote about her IVF experience and shared how she got 35 eggs to start with, but in the end she has 1 normal embryo and 2 mosaic. 
I think we can all relate to how you're feeling right now about your body betraying you. So many hugs. It's incredibly frustrating when you're told your whole life that everyone's reproductive system works a certain way (thanks, middle/high school health class) and when yours doesn't, it's a major blow. 

ETA: Anyone have tips on managing the post-retrieval bloat? I'm certainly feeling it today! 

inthewoods23

@emeraldduchess I definitely think ICSI helped our fertilization rate. They watched 15 of 17 in the following days. Yeah, you definitely can't exactly wait around for 2 days for YH to build up sperm again 😆 those eggs would be no more. Keep us updated!

kpearse99

@gingermama29 I think it's amazing how you advocated yourself to your PCP!! I'm so proud of you for speaking up about how you've been feeling!

@inthewoods23 Yes, an hour massage is NEVER enough!! Since I don't go too frequently I now book the ones for 90 minutes... that's where it's at!! 

@emeraldduchess So glad you're not in pain! I hope today continues that way for you!  Also, I believe you have an interview today?!?! So, good luck, friend!!!

@acleverusername Hey friend!! I think 100mg does sound high but I also only did one cycle on clomid, the others were on letrozole. I pretty much always had 2 ultrasound/monitoring appointments with my IUI cycles. I went in on CD 10 or 12 (I can't remember) and my follies were always growing nicely but I typically needed to go back the next day or two for another one to make sure they kept getting bigger. Then I would trigger that night and IUI in another two days. If everything looks good for you on CD 10 then you won't need to come back for another. Mine on CD 10 were always at like 16mm and my RE wanted them to be at least 18mm before telling me to trigger. So when I went back in the next day or two they were then above 20mm! I never had a cancelled IUI due to too many follies, I had 3 mature ones at one point and other smaller ones but mostly had 2 mature follies and smaller ones to tag along. I did have one cancelled IUI due to my follies shrinking though! That was a mess of a cycle!

emeraldduchess

@kpearse99 thank you! Yes, I have one this morning and another one tomorrow. Someone called me to schedule an interview while I was in the OR, so I woke up to a missed call/voicemail notification. Haha. I waited until the anesthesia wore off completely to call them back, though.  Loopy Emerald, while tons of fun, is not the first impression I wanted to give!

babyfeverbeliever

Diagnosis (if you've been): Secondary Unexplained Infertility

Status (WTO/TWW/TTA): TWW - however, today is 12DPO and BFN this morning

What are you doing this cycle? (Testing? Treatment?): Letrozole, Ovidrel trigger shot and timed intercourse

How are things going?: Not looking too promising since BFN this morning but we'll see if AF comes. This was second round using Ovidrel, not sure if we'll have to go the IUI route this time. I am a little bummed because I had some good follicles I was working with this month so I was feeling hopeful!

Any questions?: Any other success stories with Letrozole + Ovidrel + TI? 

GTKY: What is your favorite way to treat and/or pamper yourself? Definitely a spa day...nothing more relaxing in my book!

babyfeverbeliever

@acleverusername I have not done IUI but I can tell you that my Letrozole dose is four 2.5mg tablets a day for five days. That is up from 3 the month before because I only had one small follicle that month. This dosage got me 2 big follicles and 2 pretty decent ones to work with. DH and I did timed intercourse and doctor still had my trigger on day 12 with these follicle sizes:

25.5, 18, 13.5 and 11

Although I have heard of canceling a cycle for too many, I was happy that was not the case for me. I'm in TWW but had a BFN today, 12 DPO, so even with quite a few follicles I've still had trouble.

As for ultrasounds, I always have a midcycle ultrasound somewhere around day 12. I had to have a repeat ultrasound in July two days after the first because I only had one small-ish follicle and they wanted to see if it grew before allowing me to trigger.

misshelen86

@akoros Yay for af arriving! Glad to hear that you are in a better place now. Mac n cheese sounds like a great way to treat yourself!

 @kiki047 Yay! Your FET is just around the corner!! Right at the same time I’ll be starting IVF. So excited for you! Would your H be willing to give you the IM injection? I feel like it would be really difficult to do an IM yourself in the butt.

 @emeraldduchess WOW!! That’s an amazing number! Glad you’re feeling okay other than bloated. Were you expecting that many eggs based on your follie count or was it a surprise?

 @gingermama29 Glad you are taking control of your mental health!

 @inthewoods23 So sorry to hear about your sister. Your feelings are totally valid and if you need to avoid her for now that is okay! Glad you are taking steps to optimize your mental health.

 @acleverusername Yes we decided based on his post-wash count.. it’s not the first time he’s had a super low count so my Dr wasn’t optimistic that his count would ever be good enough for success with IUI. Glad to hear you are moving ahead with IUI.. I totally understand the mixed emotions. I recommend counseling.. I see someone pretty much once a month. For my IUI, I did 2 ultrasounds since my follies were too small on the first one. They generally want them to be 18-20 mm before triggering. It’s a really weird feeling when the meds kick in.. the Dr. Scanned my right ovary first and said there was nothing there. I told him I was pretty sure there was something going on with the left side because I could feel lots of twinges. Sure enough, I had 3 on that side.. but in the end just 2 mature ones.

 @babyfeverbeliever Welcome to our group.. hope your stay here is short. Sorry for your BFN!

*Edited for formatting 

kiki047

@emeraldduchess WOW girl, 29 eggs is amazing!! Way to be an overachiever. So happy for you! Will be anxiously awaiting your update later today!! Also GL on your interviews this week, hope you knock those out of the park too!   Drink lots of fluids, try to stay away from really sugary stuff (and especially artificial sweeteners), carbonated drinks and heavy starches. 

@gingermama29 *hugs* friend, I'm glad you were able to talk to your PCP. There is no shame in taking something for your anxiety. MH has been on Zoloft for a few years now and it is just the right amount of support for him to be able to function without the crushing weight of his anxiety hanging over his head. I hope it helps ease some of that for you too! 
@kpearse99 thank you, lol, MH thanks you too. I'm less 'raging' these days and just regular psycho   Only two more weeks of this....... just wait til we add in the PIO, yikes! He has a major needle-phobia so he's been "practicing" by pinching my butt lately and that is NOT helping my mood LOL. Men! 

@inthewoods23 Ohhh I just teared up reading your update. No, sister, why?! I'm so, so sorry. It's so unfair, and you have every right to be upset. MH is on Wellbutrin but he's never been pregnant (lol) so no useful anecdotal evidence here. He does feel better when he's on it, especially in combination with the zoloft. 
@acleverusername omg that egg gif had me cracking up I'm so sorry you had a tough day yesterday. I have always struggled with my boundaries and how/when/what I shared with those in my inner circle. I think everyone close to us (and then also anyone my big-mouth mother talks to) knows we're doing IVF but basically nobody asks us about it so we feel like they might as well not know. My TB ladies have been my lifeline these last 2 years and I'd be lost without them. YGPM about my IUI experience. Oh, and next time you're back in Canada they're opening up another Scandinavian spa about 20mins north of us and I'm sooo excited. I think their opening is majorly delayed due to covid but I'm stoked it'll be so close. 
@babyfeverbeliever hi there, welcome! So sorry for your BFN this morning. 
@misshelen86 so MH has an intense fear of needles, like will practically faint/puke at the sight of it lol. I had him help me with stims by letting him do the mixing part to get him used to the idea of it with much smaller needles but he still could barely watch me do it. So he says he'll "help" me with the PIO but if we're being honest with ourselves, it's not going to happen. I don't know that I trust him to do it anyway, he'll panic and just stab me then need to go dry heave in the corner. So maybe he can help me direct my hand so I can get the angle/location right, and I'll do the rest? 

kpearse99

@kiki047 I'm sorry but I'm laughing soooooo hard at the fact that YH keeps pinching your butt as "practice" 

inthewoods23

@kiki047 in combo?? that seems like overkill, but I'm not a doctor so what would I know! I'm in a much better headspace with it now. Like worst timing considering I got BFN that morning. My mom's side has lots of April birthdays so there was always a cake at Easter to celebrate the 5-6 of us so I guess it will be fun to celebrate nearby birthdays. I'm sure I'll be excited for it as time passes.

emeraldduchess

I have an update. I'll put it in a spoiler because it's long and potential TW.

Of my 29 eggs, 16 were mature, so they don't believe egg quality was our issue. However, even using ICSI, only 4 fertilized. We should have had at least 12. Based on statistics, this is not good and we've been told to expect the worst. DH's count was really, really low yesterday and we were shocked because his initial SA was excellent and his post-wash count at our IUI was 27 million. The doctor believes there is an issue with his sperm quality so they are doing a repeat SA on him. He basically stopped taking care of himself in the last few months (no exercise, sitting all day, junk food, sugary drinks, etc.), and I do wonder if that's affected his sperm quality. If it's an issue of poor sperm quality, it's unlikely that we'll even have one embryo make it to freeze and biopsy. The doctor at the hospital who did my ER and nurse at my RE's office are not optimistic. They kept saying how sorry they were. They gave us a choice of canceling the biopsy and just "rolling the dice" on a transfer, but I refuse to do that. We don't have time to just "see what happens". We can't start another cycle unless there's a transfer/0 embryos, because our insurance won't pay for that. So we will go ahead and hope to get at least one viable embryo, but we aren't holding our breath. I am devastated, DH is devastated and I just want to scream and throw things. I can't even look at him right now because I put my body through so much, spent the last two years feeling like a failure, and he didn't do anything to try to take care of himself and improve things on his end. It's like he put ALL the responsibility on me and that's completely unfair. He's been doing whatever the hell he wants as far as food/exercise/alcohol because he assumed I was the one with issues. Maybe his poor habits isn't the problem, but I can't think of anything else at the moment. I know it's wrong to be angry with him and placing blame, but I can't help it right now. I'm not thinking clearly and I am hormonal AF. I know I will calm down and see things more clearly later on. But right now I just want to scream and hit things.

inthewoods23

@emeraldduchess I don't know what to say other than I'm so sorry you're going through that 😢💚💚 your feelings are so valid. We all know IF issues can be caused by one or the other, but that doesn't mean the other can just let go of themselves. It still takes 2 to make IF treatments successful! Sending you so much love and hugs 💚💚💚. I really hope you beat the odds. We're here for you! Ok I'm gonna go tear up now 🥺

keikilove

@emeraldduchess I am so so sorry to hear all of this! 😢 I am sending you huge virtual hugs across the internet. That is such an incredibly difficult situation to be in. You have every right to be furious, frustrated, wanting to scream etc. I am 🙏🏽praying🙏🏽 that those 4 that fertilized DO make it to biopsy! It
may be too much to even think about this, but being that the insurance may present a problem for future cycles: could you do a fresh transfer now of the best-graded embryo and then wait to see if the others make it to freeze? Crossing everything that you get some healthy embryos!💓

kiki047

Oh @emeraldduchess, my heart is breaking for you. That must have been really hard to hear, and not what you were hoping. Sending all our love and hope your way to give those embies their best fighting chance. We only got 5 eggs at my ER, and still ended up with 3 PGT normal embryos so anything is possible. Feel all the feels, you have every right to be upset after everything you've been through. Hugs!!! 

@inthewoods23 yeah, he's tried one or the other but finds he feels his best while on a low dose of both. His psychiatrist explains it like the zoloft is a powerful anti-depressant/anti-anxiety med and the wellbutrin acts as a mood stabilizer when used in tandem so it kind of evens out the highs and lows. It is also meant to counteract some of the sexual side-effects from the zoloft because it has major impacts on his performance and fertility. Wellbutrin is one of the only known anti-anxiety meds out there that doesn't have as much of an effect on libido. Without it he has virtually zero drive, which led to him starting to skip his zoloft, which led to major withdrawal issues, which led to depression... sooo he has to be on both. 
ETA: glad the butt pinching is amusing, lol, he thinks he's hilarious. 

inthewoods23

@kiki047 interesting! That's kind of what I'm hoping to do. My moods swing to the extremes really easy so I wonder if I would do good with a combo. Plus, in case a doctor would recommend going off the Wellbutrin once KU I could just wean off the Wellbutrin and keep going on the Zoloft. Idk, maybe this is all something I can ask at my follow up in 2 weeks.

kiki047

@inthewoods23 it's something to keep in mind. Try with just one for a while, see how you feel. It took him 2 years to get just the right combo of meds and dosages to find one that made him feel good. He was on escitalopram (lexapro) before that and was having a lot of side-effects from it. Everyone will react differently to medication so it's all about working with someone you trust, and listening to your body to see how you feel after being on it for a while. Like anything else, it'll take time for you to adjust. I'm glad to hear you're taking steps towards bettering your mental health, it's just as important as our physical health!  

kpearse99

@emeraldduchess OMG friend, I am speechless for you and in total shock. I am so sorry you're jumping over (and probably feels like tripping over) another hurdle. You have every right to feel the anger and emotions you are feeling but, if I may make a suggestion, I do think it's important you talk those feelings out with YH (If you haven't done so already). Don't hold them in because it will fester and keep growing until it explodes one day and I wouldn't want you to end up resenting him. You guys need each other in this situation. 

misshelen86

@emeraldduchess Oh friend, I’m so sorry you are facing another obstacle. My heart goes out to you. This is all so unfair, and you have every right to feel all those feelings. Take whatever time you need to feel them and know that we are all here for you. I’m keeping everything crossed that your embryos make it to day 5.  Huge hugs to you