COVID-19 Talk

pourmeanothermocktail

I know for some of us we are in shut down places so some stuff that belongs in randoms will automatically touch on virus stuff, but let's keep any quarantine/shut down specific related talk here so randoms can cover more normal-esque life.

kyrwyn

Thank you!  

I know there was some discussion about delivery concerns in the randoms thread. I got a chance to talk to my OB at my appointment today and he thinks that the restrictions on spouses/partners during labor and recovery are absolutely insane and actually unhelpful in that they would immeasurably increase the workload on the nurses in the recovery floor who would then have to supplement care to cover the tasks that partners usually handle.  He also said he can't foresee a possibility when a c-section would be bumped from the rotation as "elective" as babies have to come out somehow.  With CA's heavy focus on VBAC as an option, our delivery hospital will continue to do everything possible to support moms who choose to attempt VBACs. Visitation is currently limited to a spouse/partner plus two adults (pre-identified at registration), no children under 18. 

I hope this is a brighter counterpoint to the news coming out of the SF Bay Area.  We'll see how it changes, but for now this was calming news for me. 

chaos-and-coffee

@kyrwyn is your hospital no visitors at all? My office is, but the maternity unit at the hospital allows one support person for laboring moms. 

ETA: oops, I see the rest of your post now. Glad your OB was able to put some of your fears at ease! 

JessiBride

Good news @kyrwyn! 

If our hospitals become overwhelmed (3 diagnosed cases at my delivering hospital and that ICU is small!) I'm going to challenge my insurance not covering birth centers (which is my preference anyway) and try to deliver there.

runwmusic

Scholastic has some free stuff for older kiddos. Tomorrow is our last day of daycare and I have no idea how I am going to work with a 15 month old at home 

<img src="https://us.v-cdn.net/5020794/uploads/editor/b3/yrp1xsaz1gan.jpg" alt="">

pourmeanothermocktail

runwmusic said:

Scholastic has some free stuff for older kiddos. Tomorrow is our last day of daycare and I have no idea how I am going to work with a 15 month old at home 

<img src="https://us.v-cdn.net/5020794/uploads/editor/b3/yrp1xsaz1gan.jpg" alt="">

Miss Megan's Kindergarten Camp on Facebook! some silly kids sing a long songs on you tube and movies with quick mom dance parties in between? Idk, good luck. My husband is having a hard time WFH with both kids around all day and I'm here!

chaos-and-coffee

I’m really struggling with all of this. I tried to give myself a little distance from it for the sake of my mental health but I work in health care and for my job that proves impossible. 

I’m scared for my parents, my in laws, my husband, this baby, and our futures. What happens if this goes on for months? I’m worried about the social and mental implications, the state of our health care system, my job, everything. 

Selfishly, I’m sad that I can’t enjoy the last trimester of my last pregnancy and it’ll be forever marked by this. Instead I’m consumed by anxiety, insomnia, and fear. There doesn’t seem to be an end in sight to this and i don’t know how I’m going to manage maternity leave with an 18 month old, at home, being unable to go anywhere. My saving grace last time was trips to target, the mall, the zoo - anywhere I could get out. I’m terrified of PPA/PPD with the current restrictions in place. 

I don’t know that I need anything other than just getting that out because DH is sick of hearing it for his own mental health. Grateful for this community and the fact that I know we are all in this together. 

sheshe3386

@chaos-and-coffee I feel ya on all of that. I’ve had three days off but I’m back to work tomorrow and every time I think of it I cry. This is the first time in my life I have no desire to be a nurse. There are just too many unknowns for me to feel any sense of comfort or reassurance with anything.

i will say, however, if it’s any help to your state of mind that I track the John’s Hopkins map religiously and most of the cases in China are resolved with no new cases.
they actually have shut down some of their Covid hospitals because they don’t have enough infected patients anymore. Since their outbreak started to get really out of control in December/January then it seems to have lasted 2-3 months. If people take social distancing seriously, there could be an end in sight.

one of the infectious disease doctors at my hospital said he believes it will have run its course by June or July. I’m holding on to the hope that that is the case.

JessiBride

@chaos-and-coffee - I feel similarly. 

I'm trying to stay informed, but not become overly consumed by news but it's HARD.  I'm worried about the mental health of the elderly who live alone and have to home isolate.  I'm worried people will fall through the cracks and not have the food and goods they need.  I'm worried about grandparents not being able to meet this baby.  I'm worried about the 20% unemployment number being proposed if measures aren't taken.

hayhay2501

Uch I literally cannot believe what’s happening. They’re saying London will be put in an Italy style lockdown by the weekend. We have no outdoor space. I’m absolutely dreading it and feeling really sad about it.

But like others when I exit my own pity bubble I’m really worried about the people who CANT work from home and will lose their jobs. And I feel bad for kids who are going to be kept home in bad situations. And So on. I just want to know when this will go back to normal!

carpediem55

@kyrwyn which city are you in? I’m in the Bay Area too. The restrictions have changed day by day, and just hope I can at least have my husband with me during labor. I’m sure we will. But who knows! 

lilaros

@chaos-and-coffee I feel the same way. I am scared of everything right now. I am scared for my parents both of whom are over 60 and with some past major health issues. I am scared for my Grandma, whose birthday is in 2 weeks and she will have to spend it alone since no one wants to get her sick. I am scared for my husband who is a cop and still has to go to work everyday. I'm scared that he'll get sick and get me or my son sick. I'm scared that he might not be allowed in the delivery room with me. Most of all, I am scared that my loved ones won't make it to meet this baby.

Then I keep thinking of all the dumb ways this virus has messed up my last couple of months of pregnancy (like having to cancel our vacation to Hawaii next month), then I feel like the biggest jerk in the world for thinking so selfishly because the real issues are so much bigger and scarier.

The one thing that does help me feel a little better, is knowing that I am not the only one who is pregnant and having to come to terms with this new reality. I would prefer if that wasn't the case for any of us, but I am grateful for this group and the fact that we can all stress/commiserate together. Hope you all are hanging in there.

JessiBride

I will say I'm happy I'm not due in the next month.  I can't imagine how that group is feeling.  Hopefully by the time we're due this will be contained.  I realize that may not be the case, but I'm clinging to that hope.

pourmeanothermocktail

As an asthmatic who had my first a month early due to physical and emotional stress...I'm very worried. I am due 6/6 and realistically anticipate more like 5/25-5/30 from family history and my second baby's birth, but I figure if I get infected or just things get too hectic could be 5/5. and that would be bad, NICU time, nix the home birth, badness. So I'm trying to not freak out, but so much not good. Chicago-general-area is only a tiny bit behind California and still has nearly no tests. I know 4 people who almost certainly have virus but haven't been tested still. Likely 3 will end up hospitalized within the week. but they were out and about until fever started, so I know there are a ton of non-reported cases.A ton. With China taking 2-3 months to start getting out of under the worst...well even my later date is in there, but the early one could be still in zero labor support zero visitor mode...and I have two kids at home that I've never spent a night away from. My husband has zero days off (can WFH but not while caring for kids) and no one else in state under 60 to take care of kids while I spent time in hospital or NICU. My mom is planning to come, assuming travel restrictions don't prevent her. But she's in Florida....so....we'll see.

kyrwyn

@carpediem55 I'm in San Diego, so southern California. We tend to be about 4-7 days behind the Bay Area in enacting policies or restrictions right now. My friends in city governance expect we'll be shelter in place by this time next week at latest. 

We are lucky in that DH can WFH indefinitely in his current position and my work is independent consulting (the company I'm currently contracted with is in Palo Alto and on shelter in place orders). We'll be financially okay one DH's income if we have to drop my work to juggle everything. 

I have a lot of anxiety about how this changes things for us for delivery and 4th trimester, but I'm also hopeful that we'll figure it out with some measure of grace. I'm trying not to indulge in reading these threads or articles nonstop because managing my stress and anxiety is important to keeping my blood sugars normal, and keeping those normal is important to preserving options for us at delivery. We are very much in the one day at a time mentality right now because that's all the bandwidth I have. 

chaos-and-coffee

@kyrwyn I’m happy that you are doing what you can to mentally take care of yourself right now ❤️ Also taking it one day at a time over here. 

SpartanCat

I'm finally 100% wfh and my husband has been doing the grocery shopping for necessities so other than doctors appointments I have no need to leave the house. It's helped my anxiety a bit but seeing positive things like China improving has helped a lot.

I worry about my husband now. He works in a lab so he cannot work from home. No one in his department is taking it seriously and the stress and anxiety is building. I am scared he'll bring it home and I'm worried about his mental health. Not much I can do about it and it's hard to see

chaos-and-coffee

@SpartanCat I think the unknown is the hardest part for me. I like facts, and we have none. Is there going to be a nationwide shutdown, can I order takeout without worrying I’m bringing germs in my house, can I take my toddler to play outside without fearing I am constantly doing the wrong thing? It gives me so much anxiety, trying to find a balance between keeping everyone safe while also maintaining some semblance of mental health. I had to turn off the news tonight. I’m pretty fearful for how long this is going to last. 

kyrwyn

All of CA just went to an indefinite stay at home order. 

State issues order for anyone living in California to stay home except for essential needs. https://bit.ly/33xGu4a

JessiBride

kyrwyn said:

All of CA just went to an indefinite stay at home order. 

State issues order for anyone living in California to stay home except for essential needs. https://bit.ly/33xGu4a

This is gonna get crazy

kyrwyn

@JessiBride Yes ma'am, it sure is. 

SpartanCat

@chaos-and-coffee same. Neither of us feel comfortable ordering out so we've actually been making food at home. Positive effect I guess. The increased wearing of gloves is not a comfort to me when it's airborne. So in the meantime, we'll keep hunkering down and pray the "daily life is fine" people will start to cooperate with social distancing so we can see improvement and go back to real life.

chaos-and-coffee

@SpartanCat we just got groceries since we were really low, and the best I could do was have DH change and shower immediately, drop bags on floor, put groceries away and wipe down bags with a Clorox wipe. If we do order takeout, it’ll be hot food, and I’ll take it out of the box, transfer it to plates and make sure everyone has washed hands really well before eating. I think both issues are similar. Honestly, I don’t think at this point there’s more we can do to prevent the spread of this. 

alli392

I’ve been avoiding this thread but gave in this morning. My medication for my lupus is one of the ones they’re testing to treat this virus and it’s gone into shortage. Thank goodness I stocked up and have enough to get me through delivery because it’s the only thing keeping my counts okay but it was terrifying to realize the people who won’t have that medication that also need it. But then, am I being selfish for “hoarding” enough for this third tri? Since my delivery was actually quite dire, I don’t actually feel that selfish-my dose is relatively small but incredibly effective and absolutely necessary for health of me and baby. But there is definitely guilt there still. 

I’m just praying so hard for my parents in health care-both over 60 with major high risk diseases. They keep going in to fight this because that’s what they do. They can’t imagine giving up on their patients now when they need it most. I need them to lend me some courage. I wish I had that ability to sacrifice like that but I also know that it’s not just me, it’s this little baby inside too who can’t help that her mom is already immunosuppressed. I have to keep her safe for now. 

That and the fact that we’re rolling out online learning all week but I don’t have childcare and DH isn’t WFH yet (hopefully that’s a yet).so I’m working between 5:30-7:30 in the mornings with students, after DD goes to bed, and full time mom in between. It’s not ideal. I feel like I’m failing my students and DD caught trying to do both. I’ve cried a lot from being overwhelmed. I’m trying to see the positives-news in China is good. My area is still relatively low on cases but it’s only a matter of time as we do have community spread. Trying to take it day by day. Trying to love this extra time with DD. 

Basically I’m in the same boat as everybody else. We’re all a little scared and anxious all of the time. Let’s to whatever we can to keep that BP down!

kyrwyn

@alli392 You are NOT being selfish for making sure you have the medication you need to manage your condition through the end of your pregnancy. Not at all. You are being RESPONSIBLE about the realities of shortfalls due to either panic stocking or off label use. I have enough insulin to get me through until delivery, unless my needs rise sharply, and while it's sad that others may not be able to secure the same peace of mind I definitely don't feel guilty about it. Systemic faults are not yours or mine to shoulder right now beyond doing what we can to flatten the curve, delay spread, and reduce the peak burden on the healthcare system. 

mummasteen

I have tried so hard to stay positve through out all this unrest but for some reason today i feel its all come down on me... first week of 2 kids home probably didnt help.. just feeling ls like why am i bringing an innosent baby into all this mayham, (june15dd) and DH possible pay cut coming... anyway vent over hope tomorrow is a better day....

wildspiritmama

I've been trying to keep a level logical head about all that's been going on but I'm honestly starting to lose my mind at this point. Theres hardly any articles or news out about risks/concerns/guidelines for pregnant women to follow especially those in the last trimester. I've been working this whole time and have alot of foot traffic in and out of my workplace. I've tried talking with family members about what they think I should do, or if I should keep working despite all these concerns. And it feels everyone else just cares about money and not my concerns of mine or my child's life. It's so frustrating not knowing if I should stay home from work or keep risking it everyday by going in. How are all of you feeling about working while 7+ months along? I've read several articles from people who were healthy in their late 20's early 30's and still had very severe cases of the virus. It seems the general consensus is, be very concerned but also not concerned and I dont know what to do with that. This is my first baby after a previous miscarriage last year and I have Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome and Endometriosis so I feel very lucky as is to have carried as far as I have with this little boy.

chaos-and-coffee

@wildspiritmama I have been working from home for a week and my boss has told me to continue to do so indefinitely - at this point I expect it’ll be until I return from maternity leave. My OB advised I stay home as much as possible. I agree the lack of concrete data is scary. Is working from home an option for you? 

kyrwyn

My storage freezer just crapped out. I was able to save all the meats by moving them to the inside freezer, but the frozen veggies I was counting on to balance my meals for GD during shelter in place are all going to get lost. I'm going to turn what I can into soup tomorrow, but I'm pretty pissed. Now we have a repair tech coming Tuesday -- with the risk and cleaning burden that entails -- and another coming Wednesday to install the dishwasher after this week's failure that I didn't even have bandwidth to tell you guys about. 

I'm so tapped out. A bunch of my prepped foods for GD just got lost and things feel ten times harder than they were this morning. 

pourmeanothermocktail

@kyrwyn Ugh. I'm really sorry. Any little thing (and that doesn't sound little to of!) really makes everything all much harder. 

Hopefully tech will year mask? And you can stock back up quickly. Not that I love anyone going to the stores, but of course everyone has to at some point. Hugs.

My husband's computer monitor died this week too. He's working from home. It was not a big deal though, I gave him mine which was small and inefficient, but avoided a store. We've since ordered a new cord for our tertiary monitor (his is really and truly dead) and now he is using that. No real work disruption for him. He was still pretty upset though and I think shaken just because again REALLY???? RIGHT NOW this thing had to break???? 

I hope the soup turns out great, and that replacing supplies gets a bit easier. Around here our less common stores are doing better with stocking and low customer volume. Woodman's has paper goods and groceries in stock, and Asian Supermarkets are nearly empty, super clean, with lots of fun frozen goods.

But cry first, grieve over the added chaos, be mad and sad. And hopefully have working dishwasher and freezer soon!

alli392

This weekend I’ve taken a need break from the news and it’s been such a relief. We’re still isolating and doing all the right things, I just gave myself permission to take time off. It was so good. It was so so good. I didn’t realize how emotionally wiped I was and how physically tired it was making me. I don’t think I went a day last week without stress crying from trying to teach/watch toddler/stay in the house/doit all. I’m hoping tomorrow I can face it all a little more ready for whatever comes ❤️ Hope y’all can do the same!

mummasteen

Omw.. so i was in the hospital today getting a b negitive rogam injection... and this nurse walked passed me and says "great time to be pregnant".. i was so taken off guard i sat stunned till it sunk in... i thought man that was a really ignorant thing to say.. like i would no the position the world would be in at this stage. Feeling a bit hurt to be honest.

lilaros

@mummasteen That is awful and that would hurt my feelings too. I am pretty sure no one on earth wants a baby to be born during a global pandemic. I'm sure she meant that as a joke, but what's going on is outside anyone's control and a remark like that makes it seem a bit like you chose this. I'm inclined to give her a pass though, she may be feeling the stress of being a healthcare worker in a time when it's pretty risky to work in a hospital. This is just a tough situation for everyone.

wildspiritmama

Unfortunately for me I'm considered an essential worker in the animal care field, I groom cats & dogs. I live in New Hampshire and they haven't called mandatory stay-in-place order however, even if they did, my company expects me to still come to work. They also sell pet food & supplies so there is heavy enough foot traffic in the store for me to be concerned and my grooming office has no ventilation and is not much larger than a walk-in closet. I'm at a loss as to what I should do, I know there isn't enough scientific evidence for public officials to truly address the virus for pregnant women, however I feel infuriated that there has pretty much been ZERO mention of precautions or concerns for pregnant women. Even in terms of the fact that pregnant women can't take most medications, and also having a fever poses great risk to an unborn child. It makes me feel as though, since they don't have enough scientific evidence, they aren't saying anything at all, putting most pregnant women at risk of contracting it, therefore giving them a larger group of women/newborns to study. And I don't feel it's right to allow women in pregnancy to go un-advised as if some sort of scientific experiment to just 'see what happens'.. maybe I'm the only one feeling this way, and maybe I wouldn't feel so upset about it if I wasn't an essential worker and was told to stay home and self-isolate, but even if I wanted to make the choice for myself, I feel such a complete lack of information/support for me to even make a decision on whether this is is risky enough to leave work on my own accord, or continue going because I shouldn't be as concerned as I currently think I should be. 

mummasteen

I put it too stress to.. maybe she was having a bad monday. I decided not to let it ruin my day...

diagonalley

@mummasteen That was super inappropriate of her.  Sure, she can think it.  I've thought it about myself.  But no matter what, WHO would have predicted this would happen?

I did join a FB group for women who are pregnant during all this and it's been...interesting.  One woman posted about how she really wants to be a mom and she had been planning to try around now, should she still move forward with those plans?  And all I can think is no, that sounds like a terrible idea! Fevers in the first trimester are far more dangerous.  People also joke about all the Corona babies that will happen as a result of being quarantined, and again, this sounds like a terrible idea.  Who knows when this thing ends and when you can realistically receive quality care again?

In semi-related news, an anesthesiologist who worked with OB patients tested positive at the hospital I'll be delivering in, so that's fun.  

pourmeanothermocktail

TW abortion/loss talk

I'm having a hard time with this having been am unplanned baby in the first place, and we debated whether we were going to choose to move forward with this pregnancy. Months later, being disabled during this time so I can't even effectively take care of the two kids I have, especially during this time where running around the house and yard plus being able to be up on my feet dancing and playing would be HUGE considering they no longer get to play with other kids...and how scary things look now and moving forward...it's really hard to know that we could have been going through this time without me expecting. I'm not exactly regretting our decision to keep the baby as much as regretting how hard that decision is hitting now that things have gone from not-ideal with finances timing etc, to astronomically terrible with the virus and disability too.

I just read an article this morning that Hong Kong who had just relaxed restrictions was back to outbreaks and closing things back down.

I don't do well at all with optimism that gets dashed...so I'm now firmly into believing this is a many many months impact globally on our lives. Spanish flu was 18 months of issues....

sheshe3386

Just had a breakdown at my OB appointment and she was so concerned she recommended me restarting my Prozac that I had gone off of. 

I agree @pourmeanothermocktail, I’m not optimistic with this one. I think it’s going to be bad for a long time. 

chaos-and-coffee

@sheshe3386 I am planning to ask my OB about proactive meds at my next appt. I don’t foresee getting through this without help. 

kyrwyn

@pourmeanothermocktail Sending you lots of love. That is a tremendously tough practical and headspace to be in. I wish there were comforting words to offer right now, but I'm not good at platitudes. All I've got is: you're seen, and not judged, and I can only hope that this tremendous weight lifts soon. 

@wildspiritmama As a scientist, I want to assure you that we don't fail to issue guidance because we want to stand in the middle of the storm and say "we have no effing clue." We do it because that's the only responsible and credible thing to do when there isn't enough data to make an assessment. Because this is novel, we haven't amassed enough collective experience, much less controlled data, to say much of anything with any degree of statistical confidence. Public health officials, in most cases, are doing their absolute best to extrapolate, plan, and respond to an entirely unforeseen situation. We are all, sadly, pregnant or not, part of the first terrible experience with this disease and there will be retrospective analyses for decades dissecting what did and didn't work. It's scary to be at the forefront of something we didn't choose into, but the people I know who are still in the lab right now are working just as tirelessly as our medical professionals and first responders to get more concrete and actionable information, or to convert research spaces into testing facilities, or even to donate their time (at personal risk and beyond their already essential jobs) to staffing testing centers that are coming online. 

sheshe3386

@chaos-and-coffee thinking of you. Sometimes we need a little help to get through, and these are especially dire circumstances.