@lachnessmomster yes its sooo painful! It also looks horrible. Everyday theres one to 2 new zits.
Pregnancy #1 DD 08.30.2007 Pregnancy #2 Natural Miscarriage at 6 weeks 03/2014 Due date 11/9/2014 Pregnancy #3 DS 02.23.2015 Pregnancy #4 Missed Miscarriage at 11 weeks 11/2018 Due date 5/22/2019 Pregnancy #5 Positive test 12/11/2019 Due Date 8/17/2020
@psychobutthead glad they okayed a couple things that should give you some relief!
@jwhite3116 great job talking to the principal I know it's hard. I am getting closer but have still not had the full convo with my boss. I did mention that DH and I had been talking about me taking a leave so.... At least she will see it coming. But it still sucks.
@BusinessWife I think mentioning that will help lessen the blow. That's how our conversation started, I filled out my letter of intent as uncertain and he had been asking me if I had a decision so I finally found the courage to tell him. Some teachers I worked with said I should just put yes that I was coming back but that felt so wrong as it was a lie. He is a great principal and I didn't want to lie to him. He actually offered me a part time teaching position but it will still be so hard to get all my kids out of the house, pump, teach all day, come home, cook dinner, etc. I've been on both ends of the spectrum, SAHM and working mom. They are both so hard. Being a mom is just so hard but I believe staying home is the right move for our family right now.
Y'all I had a dream last night the nurse read us the wrong results on our NIPT. Our last name starts with a W and in my dream the last name of the patient she read for started with an M. Anyway, when we went in for our A/S the u/s showed girl and I freaked. Sigh. I don't know why I'm having such anxiety about this.
That's good that you braced him for it. @jwhite3116 No need to string them along if really they need to think about hiring. That is an interesting perspective on having done both. If I'm 100% honest, as much as it's the right thing and I want to SAH, I'm also nervous about how hard and how different it's going to be. I feel like I'm boring and have already started watching some of those YouTube mommies doing toddler activities and whatnot. But I am looking forward to creating a little schedule / routine for ourselves, and at least a few regular outside activities to get some social interaction and not feel too pent up. I think making friends and being physically active are going to be two big things to focus on, being at home. But I do also think the sibling bond is going to be pretty awesome. Idk. I'm rambling....
@wildrainbow omg I just had a crazy dream night, too.
<div class="Spoiler">I dreamt we saw the doctor for a scan and he told me the baby was already looking <i>dangerously</i> long. And I remember looking at DH like omg are we serious? Are we actually going to have to manage a potentially dangerous delivery? Do I need to seriously go on a strict diet??? Are we going to get to carry our remaining embies? Or if we are lucky enough to have another pregnancy, will it be dangerous too? All of that in an instant look at DH. In a dream. I know you have reasons to feel anxious too, but gosh, I really thought I had gotten past a lot of the fear stuff for the time being. :(</div>
@BusinessWife Do you follow Busy Toddler on ig? If not, I think you'd like her / her candidness would help assure you that even the youtube moms that plan toddler activities for a living are winging it and gritting their teeth to get to nap time more days than not. I also love her perspective on the value of having siblings at home together, learning to bond and rely on one another as "their people." (Of course, as a non-SAHM I also think there are all kinds of valuable things that daycare offers kids, but I do think missing out on those early days of "just us" is a loss and it's very cool that you'll be in a position to give your little ones that. It's going to be so hard but also amazing.)
Thanks for the rec! @emiliadkay I will have to follow. We never really planned on me working outside the home, but our IF threw a wrench into several aspects of growing our family... Working for IF coverage being one of them. So we have tried to make the most of it, knowing that it would not be a permanent situation. Since we are here, there have been some very hard things that have not gotten any easier, and other things I really appreciate about daycare.
One of late that I'm not too pleased with is the fact that this stomach bug we are now stuck home with, was known to be going around, but no one bothered to mention till after she came down with it. 😡 Really??? But there's other things like art projects and signing and interacting with her peers I know are important, too. And I realise we can find other outlets for that besides daycare (there's a Mom's group at church that meets every other week, and another one close by at the hospital we delivered) so that's a start. It's all just such a big change.
@BusinessWife you have every right to be anxious. It is scary going from two incomes to one. The stability you lose until you adjust is very noticeable for awhile. It is worth it though, in the long run. Being able to stay home is a blessing but it also comes with its drawbacks. I think setting a routine/schedule and having plans that get you all out of the house every so often is a great idea. If I get the job working from home I still plan on sending the boys to school for one more year. I really thing a 6 and 4 year old being stuck at home with a newborn every day would be insanely boring for them. Perks would be that I can pick them up much earlier from school each day since I'll have a more flexible schedule. I will keep them home to home school after that, when the baby is older so we can do things outside of the house.
@wildrainbow I have anxiety dreams about gender and just anxiety overall. I think until I see it on the anatomy scan it just doesn't seem real. I hate pregnancy dreams in general anyway. They are freaky and vivid.
@BusinessWife What are you thinking about child care for DD after baby arrives? I've got to make decisions fairly soon about nursery for DS after baby arrives. Currently I think I will be taking a full year of maternity leave. Obviously having them both at home with me will be the cheapest option but for the sake of my sanity with two under two it might be good to still have hime go some days/mornings.
We go to MOPS, which is a faith-based moms of young children group (5 and under). There are local chapters all over. Not sure if Catholic churches do it (I think that's what you are?), but I know lots of people who go to other churches for it because not every church has a chapter.
We also go to story time at the library pretty regularly.
You know @cornichonmam I'm not too sure yet. If I leave work super early it will be nice to have that time to get into our routine before baby sullies it all up! Lol but for now the plan is just me at home with both of them. Not sure how much time DH will be able to take off to help with DD, or SIL, since she is working again these days, so I can't count on that really, and with MILs health now, I'm sure it will break her heart not to be able to help as much as she would like. I'm really not too sure, but when I mentioned the idea of doing a few days a week or something for DD when the baby arrives, he poo-pooed that PDQ. So I'm not sure how his tune may change when the time comes, or not. 🤷 Of course it would be a no brainier if I work till the end to just keep her in school a bit, but his assumption even then was that as soon as mat leave started, daycare would end. 🤦 I'm not sure if he really has thought it through, tho. :/ It's tough.
I just went through this last March when I had my second daughter... at the time I had a 2.5 (almost 3) year old. As tempting as it was for me to save money I recognized I’d need time to physically recover from childbirth and adjust to the lack of days and nights in the newborn world. We kept our daughter in daycare full time, until about 5 months into my leave when I felt ready to have her (now just over 3) home with me some days. I ended up keeping her in daycare part time and keeping her home with me a few days a week. It was nice to have some days with her and some just with baby. Having her home definitely made putting baby down for a nap in the nursery tough since I had to leave my 3 yo unattended... and forget napping when baby naps! I’ve recently managed to sneak some short naps in the days when I have both home, by putting my now nearly 4 yo in front of a movie while I nap on the couch and baby naps in the nursery. I do think it’s worth considering keeping older kids’ routines (school/childcare) the same for the first 4-6 weeks while you are physically recovering from birth. Who knows what’s to come - c section, tough birth, lots of stitches? It’d be pretty tough to run after an older kid while having a fresh newborn and physically recovering.... just my two cents since I just did this all last spring! This time around I’ll be keeping my youngest in full time daycare (she starts March 1 and will be 17-18 months when this baby arrives, so WAY too busy to be caring for while recovering) and our soon to be 4 year old will be starting preprimary school (8:30-2:30 so I’ll have to figure out if there’s another local mom I can share drop offs and pick ups with as getting a baby out of the house at a very set time twice a day can be very disruptive to naps, especially as they’re starting to get on a schedule). If and when I feel ready I will take younger DD out of full time daycare and switch her to part time to save some $, possibly halfway through my mat leave around the 6 month mark (when she’ll be two). We’ll see. Depends on what kind of 2 year old she is
Re: Weekly randoms 2/3
Pregnancy #2 Natural Miscarriage at 6 weeks 03/2014 Due date 11/9/2014
Pregnancy #3 DS 02.23.2015
Pregnancy #4 Missed Miscarriage at 11 weeks 11/2018 Due date 5/22/2019
Pregnancy #5 Positive test 12/11/2019 Due Date 8/17/2020
@jwhite3116 great job talking to the principal I know it's hard. I am getting closer but have still not had the full convo with my boss. I did mention that DH and I had been talking about me taking a leave so.... At least she will see it coming. But it still sucks.
@wildrainbow omg I just had a crazy dream night, too.
<div class="Spoiler">I dreamt we saw the doctor for a scan and he told me the baby was already looking <i>dangerously</i> long. And I remember looking at DH like omg are we serious? Are we actually going to have to manage a potentially dangerous delivery? Do I need to seriously go on a strict diet??? Are we going to get to carry our remaining embies? Or if we are lucky enough to have another pregnancy, will it be dangerous too? All of that in an instant look at DH. In a dream. I know you have reasons to feel anxious too, but gosh, I really thought I had gotten past a lot of the fear stuff for the time being. :(</div>
One of late that I'm not too pleased with is the fact that this stomach bug we are now stuck home with, was known to be going around, but no one bothered to mention till after she came down with it. 😡 Really??? But there's other things like art projects and signing and interacting with her peers I know are important, too. And I realise we can find other outlets for that besides daycare (there's a Mom's group at church that meets every other week, and another one close by at the hospital we delivered) so that's a start. It's all just such a big change.
@wildrainbow I have anxiety dreams about gender and just anxiety overall. I think until I see it on the anatomy scan it just doesn't seem real. I hate pregnancy dreams in general anyway. They are freaky and vivid.
We also go to story time at the library pretty regularly.
This time around I’ll be keeping my youngest in full time daycare (she starts March 1 and will be 17-18 months when this baby arrives, so WAY too busy to be caring for while recovering) and our soon to be 4 year old will be starting preprimary school (8:30-2:30 so I’ll have to figure out if there’s another local mom I can share drop offs and pick ups with as getting a baby out of the house at a very set time twice a day can be very disruptive to naps, especially as they’re starting to get on a schedule). If and when I feel ready I will take younger DD out of full time daycare and switch her to part time to save some $, possibly halfway through my mat leave around the 6 month mark (when she’ll be two). We’ll see. Depends on what kind of 2 year old she is