I plan an epidural but probably not as early as last time. I ended up with a csection last time and might again. But while I labored contractions were pretty intense. I’m pain aversive. And I would not have been able to keep trying to labor without it.
Is there a hospital bag post up yet? As a first time mom I would really love to know what I need to bring vs what the hospital provides. Specifically for U.S. hospitals.
@rjgmcmanus@mrszoobear wow, you ladies are really on the ball to be planning your hospital bags already. Way to go!👍👍 I just got a little nervous, because I have yet to clear out our spare bedroom/nursery, and I just realized that I have only bought a handful of baby things, and most of them are hats😆
@blueskychicago12 Oh, believe me, I'm totally unprepared. We haven't purchased a thing yet, and we're only just this weekend going to start moving furniture out of the office to turn it into the nursery. But I want to know what I need to prepare when that time comes, haha!
@blueskychicago12 - Oh gosh nothing is packed yet I promise! I'm just an extremely type A person and being a FTM I want to know everything I need to know yesterday 😂
Going back to mommy YouTube vloggers. I'm really loving the videos put out by Olivia Zapo. I would highly suggest checking her out. She can get long winded but I've found her baby product reviews and suggestions useful.
Is everyone feeling their babies move? I'm over 18 weeks and not sure I have felt her move at all yet. Possibly a tiny flutter once or twice but that's it, and I'm not even sure if it was the baby.
@blueskychicago12 I have been feeling mine for a while now, I am 16 weeks today. But, everything I have read said most people usually start to feel movement between 18-22 weeks.
@blueskychicago12 17 weeks yesterday, have been feeling flutters for probably about a week and a half now. But I don't think 18 weeks is abnormal. My doc said between 17 and 22 weeks is the typical for starting to feel movements, so I'm sure you'll feel her soon. 😊
@blueskychicago12 I've been low-key concerned about movement too! Haven't for sure felt anything yet, and I was feeling much more movement at this point last time. I'm wondering about a possible anterior placenta? Guess I'll find out at my anatomy scan this week.
16+6 and I haven’t felt anything. My OB said between now and the 20 week anatomy scan I should start to feel. My college bestie had an anterior placenta and apparently that can make to harder to feel - so I guess I’ll know more at the anatomy scan.
@blueskychicago12 - Currently 16 & 1/2 weeks along. I for sure felt her once but it was a tiny flutter when I was laying down. The 2nd time I wasn't sure if it was baby or gas lol. But no gas "came out" anywhere so I'm fairly current it was her.
I've read you feel it more when laying or sitting down and taking it easy. Basically when your calm and resting. Not sure how true that is. I also heard FTM's have a hard time identifying the flutters as baby until 20 weeks or after when they become certain and more frequent. Usually the moms who can tell right around 16 weeks have had a baby before and know exactly what it feels like.
@blueskychicago12 Yesterday was the first time I’ve felt anything that I was sure wasn’t gas. It was a few taps in the same spot. But it’s hasn’t been consistent so far. I think 22 weeks like others have said is the time to really worry about lack of movement.
Anyone experiencing or have experienced hip pain while laying down? The only time my hips ache is when I’m laying down on my side. I have a pregnancy pillow...I guess that’s supposed to help? 🤷🏾♀️ Any tips for how to cope with it? Last night it felt like I had a Charlie Horse in my hips!
@lioness_389 - for me the hip pain has been pretty brutal!
I've been sleeping with a pillow between my legs but I took it away last night and that maybe seemed to help some. Charlie horse is a good way to describe it - its almost like a bruise when I lay on it (there isnt one though).
My midwife recommendes some pelvic floor physio therapy to see if I am out of alignment.
Does anyone have any ideas on how to get short term daycare? We've been touring daycares for when I go back to work in May 2020 and the one with the nearest availability isn't available until August 2020 (what?!?). Does anyone have any suggestions on how to go about finding full time childcare for a 5 month old, but just for 2 and a half months?
@rjgmcmanus I have no words of wisdom on this. I drive a Jeep and have been wondering how next summer we will juggle dogs, baby and bags/stroller to the beach. And that’s even with putting the dogs in the “trunk” area. With having two I’m not loving the idea of having them on the backseat with baby.
@anniemarie887 Yeah, that's why I'm thinking a combo of this bucket hammock and the buckle in harness might do the trick...I hate the idea of him just free floating in the backseat with the baby too. We figure the hammock will basically act as a barrier, and the belt will keep him from knocking over the hammock/reaching baby just in case. But if anyone has a different idea, I'm open to it.
We've pretty much decided that when we get pregnant with the second, we're upgrading to bigger cars. But it doesn't make sense right now, and is still manageable.
Anyone else heard of or follow " mommy.labor.nurse " on Instagram? She admits she's not an expert, but man...she is smart, and brings up so much stuff most of my apps and doc have not even touched on and it is all very interesting. She also has a website with tons of info. I really love following her and she is super real! I also love reading the comments on her posts because her followers are all very insightful & realistic. Just thought I'd share!
@rjgmcmanus I have a dog, but I also have a Subaru Impreza with plenty of room in the hatch for my pup. That's been her spot as long as I've had her. The hammock you posted looks like a pretty good solution, though! 50 lbs is a manageable size...is your dog well behaved enough that they'd hang out in there okay?
If so, my only other thought (if you weren't planning on doing this already) would be to introduce your pup to the setup before baby comes. Maybe put the hammock in first, let him/her get used to riding around in it (lots of treats to reinforce??), then put in your car seat, too.
Good luck! I'm doing PLENTY of dog-related prep for baby in my own house right now!
@ninrms He's pretty well behaved, but he is also used to being sprawled out across the entire backseat, so I'm not sure how he'll feel about being limited to the one corner. But definitely, we're planning to get the hammock within the next few weeks and just start using it with him before baby comes along.
@rjgmcmanus we had a pop up house for our dogs that actually had a car seat loop so you could strap it in. My one dog chewed the zipper so we now just have them lay on the floor but typically are only in the car for a few min.
@ktmaesim yes! I love her posts. She really is spot on with what she’s saying.
@lucylivesinwa there is an agency near my town who handles baby nurses, typically you only have them for a short time and they also offer members babysitting service. A company like this might be your best bet. Or may to aug is typically when college students are out for the summer. If you find someone who comes to you when the baby is born you may be comfortable enough leaving your baby with that person while you work.
@rjgmcmanus we have a 51-lb German Shepherd mix and a Corolla! We put the car seat in the middle and she just sits on the end. She's been really good about not harassing the baby, but we made training a priority when we got her and it helps that she doesn't have any problems with riding in the car. It'll be interesting when we have 2 car seats, though. She'd probably fit in the middle (she's skinny) but we'll have to see.
@nothingbuttherain He's well trained, we made that a priority too when we first got him, but he is a nervous car rider...it takes him a while to get settled back there, and when he does, he sprawls across the whole thing. He's a rescue, and was found abandoned on the side of the road. For the first few months we had him, we had to straight up pick him up and place him in the car, he wouldn't go himself. We think whoever had him prior literally just drove him out and dropped him off in the middle of nowhere, and that's why he had issues with getting into cars. Now he will get in on his own, but like I said, he's still nervous and takes a while to settle and just lie still.
I’ve been feeling flutters since about 13 weeks, but it’s not uncommon for multi-time moms to feel it sooner. Or rather, identify it earlier. Many of you FTM’s probably are feeling movement, but just aren’t yet able to identify it as such instead of it being other bodily functions.
Has anyone else lost any friends during this time? My best friend in the area no longer reaches out to me because she struggles with infertility herself (I think that's why.... she never told me). Another friend really took advantage of me and I called her out on it and I don't wish to continue the friendship. My only real friends don't live in my area, they live time zones away and I'm pretty lonely.
@bookworm492 Take this however you like but speaking from experience your friend may just need time to sort thru her emotions. It took us 5 years, 6 months of Clomid, and IVF to get here but each time a friend announced a pregnancy it was a knife to my heart. Don’t feel guilty about your pregnancy or like you pushed her away, if she’s a true friend she’ll come around.
@k_mama91 yeah I get that. Maybe I'm a jerk but if she comes around eventually and acts like nothing happened I'm not sure I'm willing to welcome her back in my life. It's been a rocky few months for me outside of pregnancy as well (rough job transition, tomorrow I'm putting down my second cat in under 6 months) and I could have used a friend. She told me at one point I was ther only friend of hers that was understanding about her fertility struggles. I've tried to be gentle, I don't talk or post about the pregnancy (none of my other local friends even know), I'm trying to be as kind as possible. It's like idk if she does come back, if she'll just back away again when she needs to without a word and I'm left wondering.
@bookworm492 I haven't "lost" any friends or anything, but I have def had my feelings hurt by one of mine not EVER asking how I am doing, or feeling etc. when the rest of my close friends have...our relationship has been a bit rocky bc of some big life changes in the past year or so ...which just sucks. I'm done reaching out myself thought because I do ALL the work!! I literally sent her a video of the heartbeat the first time we heard it and she didn't even respond.... Sorry you are going through that I think it's really hard. I think a lot of us have it happen unfortunately. :-/ And so sorry about your kitty :-(
@ktmaesim gosh I'm sorry she didn't even respond to the video! And thanks, I'm sad to lose my cat, she's terribly ill though and her quality of life is just nonexistent. We only adopted her 3 months ago, as a way to heal after our other cat died. I wish I could have spent more time with her.
Re: QUESTION Thread
Married 1/28/17
TW:
BFP #2 10/10/17, MC 11/4/17
BFP #3 12/17/17 Birth 8/13/18
BFP #4 4/21/19 Birth 12/5/2019
Going back to mommy YouTube vloggers. I'm really loving the videos put out by Olivia Zapo. I would highly suggest checking her out. She can get long winded but I've found her baby product reviews and suggestions useful.
I've read you feel it more when laying or sitting down and taking it easy. Basically when your calm and resting. Not sure how true that is. I also heard FTM's have a hard time identifying the flutters as baby until 20 weeks or after when they become certain and more frequent. Usually the moms who can tell right around 16 weeks have had a baby before and know exactly what it feels like.
I've been sleeping with a pillow between my legs but I took it away last night and that maybe seemed to help some. Charlie horse is a good way to describe it - its almost like a bruise when I lay on it (there isnt one though).
My midwife recommendes some pelvic floor physio therapy to see if I am out of alignment.
on this. I drive a Jeep and have been wondering how next summer we will juggle dogs, baby and bags/stroller to the beach. And that’s even with putting the dogs in the “trunk” area. With having two I’m not loving the idea of having them on the backseat with baby.
We've pretty much decided that when we get pregnant with the second, we're upgrading to bigger cars. But it doesn't make sense right now, and is still manageable.
https://mommylabornurse.com
https://www.instagram.com/mommy.labornurse/
If so, my only other thought (if you weren't planning on doing this already) would be to introduce your pup to the setup before baby comes. Maybe put the hammock in first, let him/her get used to riding around in it (lots of treats to reinforce??), then put in your car seat, too.
Good luck! I'm doing PLENTY of dog-related prep for baby in my own house right now!
I’ve been feeling flutters since about 13 weeks, but it’s not uncommon for multi-time moms to feel it sooner. Or rather, identify it earlier. Many of you FTM’s probably are feeling movement, but just aren’t yet able to identify it as such instead of it being other bodily functions.