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lelkcot

@kt2019mom if both your OB and the OB from whom you got a second opinion from agree that this isn’t a worrying sign, I would try and take comfort in that. In pregnancy the doctors tend to be very up front about concerns and potential issues. You may want to consider speaking to a councilor about your fears and anxiety around this finding and seeing if that helps. You could also consider a private ultrasound, however the timeframe for the follow-up is likely related to the time it typically takes for the cyst to resolve itself. Hoping you can finding some peace.

lindseyb918

@kt2019mom that sounds really stressful, though I hope you find their feedback encouraging/ reassuring. If it was me, I would tell my doctor that my anxiety from the cyst has been really severe. If you'd be willing to pay out of pocket, maybe they'd be willing to do another ultrasound at 24 wks to see if anything has changed? Then you could at least see something on the calendar to put you at ease a bit and look forward to in the near future

govanalyst86

@meggyme @lelkcot I think you both have a point on bras. In the morning the symptoms are minimal so not wearing a bra over night does seem to make things better. Thanks for your thoughts on massage / warm compress also.

westslopemama

@govanalyst86 I have also noticed brusing/darkening of the inner side of both of my breasts. They don't hurt, but it seems like the pores in that area are enlarged and there are increased fatty deposits there. My Midwife examined them, but she didn't seem concerned. She thought they might be from wearing a bra that was too small or the underwire irritating my skin. I have also gone up a few sizes and I feel like my breasts now rub/squish together so it might be from that. It started around 13 weeks and I'm 19 now. It hasn't gotten better or worse since changing bras. I am planning on asking her to look again at my next appointment.

govanalyst86

@emarcinek99 thanks for sharing your symptoms! Makes me feel less abnormal. I think having my midwife check again is a good idea too. Thanks.

maggiemadeit

Any c-section mamas having a lot of pain in the incision site? My belly has really popped here in the last 2 weeks (I feel HUGE) and I am getting a ton of sharp pain right down low around that area, especially when I am walking. Not sure if it’s normal RLP or c-section scar related? 

I am heading to the midwife on Tuesday for a regular appointment so I can ask then. Just curious if anyone else has the same thing going on. 

BuckeyeNut05

@maggiemadeit I had a c-section with my girls, but so far no pain at the incision site this pregnancy.  I hope you're able to get some answers soon and some relief!

tennisbabymama

@maggiemadeit I’ve had some pain down there for sure. I wouldn’t call mine a ton of sharp pain but definitely some every now and then. My doctor warned me at my first appointment that it would happen so I haven’t been too worried about it. 

violetmarie61516

Alright ladies, I'm on my lunch break so this will need to be short but I have to update and get some thoughts from others.  Let me reminder everyone about my FFFC quite some time ago.  This LO is not my husband's child and he still doesn't know.  At first I was sure the pregnancy wasn't going to last and then we both started new jobs, our adopted DD started daycare and there has just been so much going on and now I'm 19 weeks, everyone knows I am pregnant and I still haven't told him it isn't his.

We went through 5 years of IF treatments and I was told I couldn't get pregnant.  Well I made a choice to go visit someone who I fell in love with years ago and never really resolved my feelings.  Basically, I think I married the rebound guy.  And well now I'm pregnant.

Our DD was a planning adoption from my best fri nd and her husband.  We've had her since birth, o was in the delivery for the C-section and the adoption has been finalized for a long time. She turned two in June.  So I told my friend finally that I was pregnant and I also told her who's child it is. She flipped out completely and hasn't spoken to me.  She said she can't believe I'm going to be divorcing my husband and having a baby with someone else and basically destroying Their daughter's life (as in her and her husband's daughter).

The last thing she said to me was that she was losing sleep over this. Um hello, what does she think I've done?  

Honestly I just don't even know what to do at this point. My husband doesn't know, my best friend hates me, I feel completely used by the father because he's been a complete asshole and I haven't seen or talked to him (only via texts) since I got pregnant.

I know how many mistakes I've made on so many levels so please try not to be too mean but any thoughts on what you would do?  

swanbrooner

@violetmarie61516 Easier said than done, but I think you have to come clean. You owe it to your family and this baby, too. 

As for your friend, that adoption arrangement sounds like it could definitely get a little messy. I guess I could sort of understand that she envisioned placing her bio daughter with you and your now husband, but when she placed her, she also gave up the ability to dictate anything to do with her upbringing and how she'd be raised. If you and your DH don't work out, he will still be her dad, regardless of your marital status. 

Do you want to stay with your husband?

meggyme

violetmarie61516 said:

Alright ladies, I'm on my lunch break so this will need to be short but I have to update and get some thoughts from others.  Let me reminder everyone about my FFFC quite some time ago.  This LO is not my husband's child and he still doesn't know.  At first I was sure the pregnancy wasn't going to last and then we both started new jobs, our adopted DD started daycare and there has just been so much going on and now I'm 19 weeks, everyone knows I am pregnant and I still haven't told him it isn't his.

We went through 5 years of IF treatments and I was told I couldn't get pregnant.  Well I made a choice to go visit someone who I fell in love with years ago and never really resolved my feelings.  Basically, I think I married the rebound guy.  And well now I'm pregnant.

Our DD was a planning adoption from my best fri nd and her husband.  We've had her since birth, o was in the delivery for the C-section and the adoption has been finalized for a long time. She turned two in June.  So I told my friend finally that I was pregnant and I also told her who's child it is. She flipped out completely and hasn't spoken to me.  She said she can't believe I'm going to be divorcing my husband and having a baby with someone else and basically destroying Their daughter's life (as in her and her husband's daughter).

The last thing she said to me was that she was losing sleep over this. Um hello, what does she think I've done?  

Honestly I just don't even know what to do at this point. My husband doesn't know, my best friend hates me, I feel completely used by the father because he's been a complete asshole and I haven't seen or talked to him (only via texts) since I got pregnant.

I know how many mistakes I've made on so many levels so please try not to be too mean but any thoughts on what you would do?  

@violetmarie61516 I think you firstly you need to decide what you want the end result to be. Do you want to stay with your husband, the "rebound guy" or are you happier alone, since it doesn't seem that the father is interested in being a family. I think a counselor/therapist would be helpful in figuring out your feelings and how best to move forward. I think you know what you NEED to do and that is tell your husband the truth. It's all a ticking time bomb now that you've told someone else and it's probably better to let it explode on your terms than let it fester. The longer he is deceived the more catastrophic it will be.

You've made it seem previously like you are in a sort of companionate marriage, but it's unclear if that feeling is mutual or not. If you both feel that you are married for the convenience and friendship of it, you might be able to come out of this together with the help of a therapist and a lot of HONEST communication. If you do not both feel that you are in love, then you have been stringing your husband along for too long already. Either way a therapist will be helpful to your co-parenting relationship with your daughter.

This probably seems mean, but I am a straight forward person. I'm not one to sugarcoat. And I think you already know this is what needs to happen but it has the potential/ probability to blow up your whole life and it's scary. Regardless of what you do, we are here to support you emotionally. You can do this and I think eventually, one day you will feel better not having to lie about this anymore.

lelkcot

@violetmarie61516 I think @swanbrooner asked, in my opinion, the most important question: do you want to stay with your husband. I think that is probably what you need to figure out first, and then move forward from there. I do think, regardless, he deserves to know about the bio-father, especially since bio-father know about the baby.
As for the fight with your friend, when they chose you &YH as adoptive parents, they also gave up their rights to make choices for the child. I’m sorry you’re not getting support or understanding from your friend, it sounds like a tough and complicated situation.
Regardless of what you decide to do, sending some positivity your way!

mayoduck

@violetmarie61516 Phew. There is no easy resolution here without consequences of some sort but I agree with others that you need to figure out whether you still want to be with your husband, be honest with him and honest with yourself. I'm sure it is a huge emotional weight and I agree with others that a therapist may be helpful. The truth has a way of coming out eventually and the longer it goes unsaid, the worse the potential consequences.
I hope you are able to find some clarity in which decision will ultimately make you happiest.

ashley14598

Tonight after I got out of the bath I was
getting dressed and had shooting, sharp pain in my vagina. Anytime I stood all the way up it was still there. I know it’s probably lightening crotch but I don’t remember it lasting as long as this feels like it’s lasting (off and on going on 15-20 minutes now). I was in tears from the pain and DH had to help me get to bed. I felt like I was/am being very dramatic but it hurt! I’m laying down now and if I extend my legs out of the fetal position it comes back ... any clues as to what’s going on or how to make it stop. Thanks in advanced! 

Edited because when I’m in pain spelling and grammar are hard! (Sorry if I missed any)

3rdtime_charmed

@ashley14598 I don’t know how to make it stop but it sounds like Round Ligament Pain. Mine got better when my belly popped but it was really intense at times.

litzi-2

@ashley14598 I've had that a couple of times, it hurts!! Mine was worse when I was on my feet all day and more vulvar varicosities issues. I get RLP too but its on the sides.

@violetmarie61516 I'm sorry you're going through this all. If you could, finding a therapist might be a good idea. You could use that support and advice from a professional ongoing.

ashley14598

@3rdtime_charmed @litzi-2 thanks! I was sure it was somewhat normal but it scared me with how painful it was and how long it was lasting. 

mamakate1616

Anyone else getting crazy cramps? I got them in my calves pretty regularly with DD and could make them go away by flexing my feet, but this time around I’m getting big toe cramps and they hurt sooo bad. Can’t get them to stop either 

meggyme

@mamakate1616 I got crazy charley horses last pregnancy and when my legs are tight and I’m a little dehydrated I get them. Like you, I can make them stop sometimes by flexing my feet. They started this last weekend after I spent too long walking in heels. I haven’t gotten toe cramps but did have some pinched nerves that made my toes go numb. Make sure you wear shoes with good arches and don’t walk around barefoot too much.

Kenneylynn3

When to take classes?  I really want to take a breastfeeding course and birth prep class. When should I be looking to take these classes?

purpleteacher82

@Kenneylynn3 Great question! I’ve been wondering the same thing! 

meggyme

@Kenneylynn3 I would take them sooner than later. You never know when you're going to go into labor and often times the people teaching them are doulas/labor nurses with some really helpful comfort measures you can use during pregnancy as well as during labor. That said, we took ours last time over a weekend in my 8th month of pregnancy because DH wasn't home from deployment until then.

maggiemadeit

@Kenneylynn3 Check out the format of the classes you are interested in. If you are going for a weekend course then you have a lot of flexibility, but some courses, like Bradley method, are 12 weeks so you would want to start soon. 

lelkcot

@Kenneylynn3 there was no way I was getting DH to commit to a multi week class, so we just did a one day intensive birthing class early in third tri with DS. Did the cpr/first aid class around then as well.

navete

@Kenneylynn3 I just signed up with a doula and she suggested starting between weeks 23-27, so that I could space out the classes once/month rather than trying to cram them in at the end. Her classes are three 3hr sessions. 

It sounds like there are different methods/types of classes, so as @maggiemadeit suggested, it’s probably good to start looking soon in case the method you’re interested in needs an early start.

blueberry0326

Is anyone else dealing with itchy skin?? Mine is mostly my arms and legs...literally putting lotion on numerous times throughout the day and it is still driving me crazy!! Any ideas?

gowenc

@blueberry0326 you may want to call your OB about it since itching can be a sign of cholestasis. Might just be dry skin, but better to know for sure.

maggiemadeit

@blueberry0326 I agree with @gowenc that you should mention it to your doc, just in case. I have been itching like crazy too. Between dry winter air, heat indoors, and my stretching belly, there isn’t enough lotion or coconut oil in the world...

violetmarie61516

I've been looking into classes as well and I'm curious what everyone previous experiences have been if you are not a FTM. Lamaze? Bradley? Hypnobirthing? Birthing from within? Any and all experiences and knowledge welcome!

diaphena

Is anyone else a stubborn back sleeper? My OB advised me to stop sleeping on my back by 20 weeks, which I'm about to be in a few more days. Even before pregnancy I would fall asleep on my side and wake up on my back, so I've just continued doing that throughout this pregnancy. I've put a regular pillow behind me to try to stop myself from rolling over, but I seem to just push it out of the way in my sleep. Any suggestions for keeping me on my side? Or is it time to spring for one of those big U-shaped pregnancy pillows?

mamakate1616

@diaphena I think the general idea is once it becomes too uncomfortable to sleep on your back, that’s when it’s time to stop. I’m a stubborn back sleeper too and almost always wake up on my back even though I try to sleep on my side. Same was true for my whole pregnancy with DD & I had the giant U shaped pillow with her. 

mayoduck

@diaphena My hips hurt so much after a certain amount of side sleeping that I HAVE to lean at least partially on my back in order to take the pressure off. I just use a regular pillow but I really wedge it under my back and then lean against it. I don't know if that'll work for you I would thing it's harder to push it out of the way if your weight is on it. I have a u-shaped pillow that I started using in the late first trimester but stopped because it was just so darn BIG and took up so much space! I might try out one of those smaller wedge pillows.

meggyme

@diaphena I think you're just not supposed to lay flat on your back. A little angle to either side (or up if you have heartburn) with the use of a pillow (even just a regular pillow) should be enough to keep your uterus from squashing your arteries. And like mamakate1616 said, at a certain point you will feel uncomfortable on your back for extended periods and naturally move around in your sleep.

diaphena

Thank you ladies! @mamakate1616 @mayoduck @meggyme I have noticed some discomfort in my legs/hips when I wake up on my back so it made me a little nervous. I think I'll try another pillow wedged behind my back so I can lean on it and at least not be laying flat.

chocolatelemons

@diaphena I’m a back sleeper too and I still end up that way sometimes, but it’s definitely become more uncomfortable lately and I haven’t been waking up as often that way. For me, I feel short of breath when I’m on my back. I’m 23 weeks tomorrow so maybe it will start becoming less comfortable for you and your body will naturally start sleeping in a different position. 

I have a snoogle which I use occasionally but it makes me super hot so I usually end up throwing it on the floor. If it doesn’t bother you, the pillow did seem to stop me from rolling over.

catlady2015

@diaphena - I’m having the same issue. I had to train myself to sleep on my back a few years ago and now going to my side is really hard, I keep waking up on my back and only sleep about 3 hours at a stretch. This is due to presssure on the back or arm pain from lying on my side (old injury/surgery makes it hard to sleep on my side). I do what @mayoduck does and really wedge it underneath my back to try to prop. Considering springing for a snoogle now that we have a bigger bed, but hoping I’ll adjust to the regular pillow behind position and get a bigger sleep stretch. Hope that might work for you! 

diaphena

@catlady2015 Hope you can find a way to get some better sleep soon! I wonder if something like the snoogle would help take some pressure off your back and arm. I ordered one of those c-shaped pillows off Amazon - cheaper than the snoogle but we will see about the quality  If the regular pillow wedged under my back works then maybe I'll return the body pillow.

@chocolatelemons Yeah I'm hoping as I get farther along I'll naturally roll off my back more. So far it isn't uncomfortable enough to wake me up at night or make me change positions in my sleep, but I definitely feel it when I wake up in the morning!

Thanks again ladies for your suggestions!

catlady2015

@diaphena - if you like it, let me know which one it is! I’d really rather not spend the money for the snoogle, but I’m getting desperate for a good sleep stretch. 

ashley14598

I know being dizzy has come up a few times but I didn’t pay too much attention because it hasn’t affected me ... until this point. I’m kicking myself for not paying more attention. Anyways I woke up this morning and I knew I was tired but when I got out of bed I literally couldn’t walk in a straight line. I was walking all over the place and was very close to walking into the door of our bedroom to get to the bathroom. The entire room was spinning and I had to sit to a bit to get things to calm down. Any idea what this is or if it’s to be concerned about? I’ve been fine since. 

Thanks! 

catlady2015

@ashley14598 - this is often due to lower blood pressure. You might have sat up/stood up too quickly. This has happened to me when standing up too quickly. Take your time changing positions and it should be better.  Scary! Sorry you had to experience that this morning!