Question? Need help? ***POST HERE***

JLaVO888

Post any and all of your pregnancy related questions here and you will receive a quick response. Also, read through other questions and chances are your question has been asked and already answered! Make sure you drop by the introduction thread as well so we can get to know you.

JLaVO888

@BumpAdmin Can we get this pinned please? 

brookepdavis

@BumpAdmin pin please!

Swanigam

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bluebell08

I've exhausted google today but I'm realizing I probably should have started here in the first place. (Not sure if the is TW)Question for mammas that have experienced pregnancy after losses or have delt with anxiety in general. How do you cope? I've personally never really delt with anxiety but the past two weeks it's almost been crippling, border line panic attack heat racing/ reminding myself to breath type stuff. None of my friends have really delt with losses and it's hard to explain how I feel when I can't even bring myself to tell anyone I'm expecting again. Did anything specific help anyone?

Allycat11

bluebell08 said:

I've exhausted google today but I'm realizing I probably should have started here in the first place. (Not sure if the is TW)Question for mammas that have experienced pregnancy after losses or have delt with anxiety in general. How do you cope? I've personally never really delt with anxiety but the past two weeks it's almost been crippling, border line panic attack heat racing/ reminding myself to breath type stuff. None of my friends have really delt with losses and it's hard to explain how I feel when I can't even bring myself to tell anyone I'm expecting again. Did anything specific help anyone?

Therapy has been the single most helpful thing for me. I have struggled with it my entire life and have left it untreated for most of my life. After DD was born it got really bad but I did not seek help because I was not depressed...when I was pregnant with DS it got bad enough it led to major depression and that is when I finally got help. Now it is out of control again so I am working on fixing it again. 

Some specific things that help me other than therapy:
-routine
-not falling behind on things ( I currently can not clean my house because it has gotten so bad)
-diet and exercise to an extent
-taking time for myself
-regularly doing something social

I am at a point where the above aren't even working so I likely will go back to medication sooner than later. FWIW i was medicated for 3 months of my pregnancy with DS and he is a happy healthy 2 year old. 

Hang in there you are not alone ❤

maggiemadeit

@bluebell08 I have suffered from anxiety most of my life. The single most impactful thing for me is regular exercise. I have to move my body every single day, or my anxiety really starts to creep in. There are also studies that show that exercise is as effective as drugs for anxiety/depression.

That being said, hormones play a HUGE part in regulating emotional responses like anxiety, so if you are truly suffering please seek the help of a professional. I had to go on anxiety medication during the 6 months of chemical menopause I went through because my hormones were just so out of whack. 

And please accept these internet *hugs*. I know what it feels like, and I hope you will be feeling better soon. 

mschanandlerbong1214

I’m going to second therapy. I drive myself insane in my own head but once I talk it out with someone who knows the right questions to ask, it helps me so much.

Allycat11

@bluebell08
If you do end up going the therapy route make sure you find someone you are truly comfortable with. My parents made me see someone in highschool who I was not comfortable with and it did more harm than good. I tried again in college and saw someone who was a terrible fit, which steered me away from therapy for years. When I decided to seek help a few years ago I spoke up first in my OB office and they connected me with an amazing woman who specializes in perinatal and post partum mood disorders. My first visit with her I explained my history with therapists and she said if I am not comfortable with her there are no hard feelings and they could help find someone else in the organization or I could go elsewhere.  For the past 2.5 years I have seen her off and on and can not imagine seeing anyone else. 

kerco925

I agree with therapy.  Being able to tell someone everything you feel can be so helpful.  Being pregnant and raising kids can bring up so much stress and anxiety, in addition to all the hormone changes.  I hope you can get some relief soon.  

mschanandlerbong1214

Allycat11 said:

@bluebell08
If you do end up going the therapy route make sure you find someone you are truly comfortable with. My parents made me see someone in highschool who I was not comfortable with and it did more harm than good. I tried again in college and saw someone who was a terrible fit, which steered me away from therapy for years. When I decided to seek help a few years ago I spoke up first in my OB office and they connected me with an amazing woman who specializes in perinatal and post partum mood disorders. My first visit with her I explained my history with therapists and she said if I am not comfortable with her there are no hard feelings and they could help find someone else in the organization or I could go elsewhere.  For the past 2.5 years I have seen her off and on and can not imagine seeing anyone else. 

Yes! This is so so so important! It took me well over a decade to find the right fit for me. Don’t be afraid to say it’s not working out if it isn’t. Your health is far more important than any preceived hurt feelings. 

bluebell08

Thank you all so much for the responses!! Truly so kind. After reading the responsees, I realized I haven't been to the gym once since finding out when normally I'm there4-5 days a week. Hopping back on the routine Monday morning and hoping that helps. If I don't feel big changes in a few days I'm definitely going to contact my dr for a suggestion on who to see. 

mappowell

@bluebell08 I had two losses before my daughter, this is my first pregnancy since her, I can completely empathize with you, honestly it’s just day to day for me, it’s so hard I try to stay busy but really it’s hard AF. Like I said I don’t have lots of advice other than it’s totally normal and I get you mama❤️

swanbrooner

@BumpAdmin Can we get a sticky, please?

midwestmommatobe

Anyone else sneezing a lot more than usual? 

sew322

@midwest1sttimemama I have been sneezing like crazy, but I caught a headcold from DS. I have been sneezing and having head congestion with headaches for 2-3 days now. It is FINALLY starting to let up.

mamakate1616

I have been a non stop sneezer, thankfully no accompanying cold symptoms!

I assume everyone who has been thru loss agrees that it is hard AF to cope, especially in the early weeks. This is my 5th pregnancy and will hopefully be my second take home baby, the worrying is basically consuming every free moment I have. What gets me thru most of the time is the “today I am pregnant” mantra. Hang in there 

purpleteacher82

@BumpAdmin Sticky Please!!!!

swanbrooner

@BumpAdmin A sticky would be lovely!

novelblessings

A note on the therapy topic. I’m a therapist in private practice. It’s ok to shop around, we don’t take offense. Not everyone clicks with their initial therapist, their personality, or their techniques. I know I attract a certain client but then I know I can make the most impact with that specific client compared to another. If you have further questions about the process let me know! 

brookepdavis

@BumpAdmin Can we get a sticky please?

indigoheightsblog

Thoughts on me going to Atlantic City this weekend? I was invited to my husband's friend's 30th birthday. I was going to sit out because 1. I can't drink, 2. Ther'es a ton of smoke in the casinos, and 3. I'm a little tired these days..... but they are all begging me to come, telling me Harrah's has a ton of stuff to do including a great pool and that I can avoid the casinos and nap whenever I want....... I'm on the fence! Curious to know what the rest of you think! I'll be 8 weeks along this weekend with no crazy symptoms, no morning sickness, generally feel really good. Thinking if I go I could always shop, get a facial and lounge by the pool in the worst case scenario. What are your opinions? 

Allycat11

indigoheightsblog said:

Thoughts on me going to Atlantic City this weekend? I was invited to my husband's friend's 30th birthday. I was going to sit out because 1. I can't drink, 2. Ther'es a ton of smoke in the casinos, and 3. I'm a little tired these days..... but they are all begging me to come, telling me Harrah's has a ton of stuff to do including a great pool and that I can avoid the casinos and nap whenever I want....... I'm on the fence! Curious to know what the rest of you think! I'll be 8 weeks along this weekend with no crazy symptoms, no morning sickness, generally feel really good. Thinking if I go I could always shop, get a facial and lounge by the pool in the worst case scenario. What are your opinions? 

I would definitely go and would just avoid smokey casinos. 

southerngirlinwi

indigoheightsblog said:

Thoughts on me going to Atlantic City this weekend? I was invited to my husband's friend's 30th birthday. I was going to sit out because 1. I can't drink, 2. Ther'es a ton of smoke in the casinos, and 3. I'm a little tired these days..... but they are all begging me to come, telling me Harrah's has a ton of stuff to do including a great pool and that I can avoid the casinos and nap whenever I want....... I'm on the fence! Curious to know what the rest of you think! I'll be 8 weeks along this weekend with no crazy symptoms, no morning sickness, generally feel really good. Thinking if I go I could always shop, get a facial and lounge by the pool in the worst case scenario. What are your opinions? 

I am always pro-facial and pool lounging. I'd go and just duck out of the things that you don't want to do.

meggyme

@indigoheightsblog it doesnt seem like there is any reason for you not to go if you want to.

3rdtime_charmed

Laying by the pool and a great hotel room for naps? Plus food anytime and fun mocktails? I’m jealous!!

indigoheightsblog

@3rdtime_charmed well when you put it that way....... heck yes! haha. thanks for all your responses! felt great to have some reassurance! 

bluebell08

@indigoheightsblog I hope you enjoy the pool and get some lovely R&R!

sew322

Over the past few days I have noticed brown discharge when I wipe. The TP is just tinged light brown. There have been other times that I have noticed some darker brown specks as well (similar to pepper). When I first noticed it it came and went. The first day I only saw it once, a few days later I noticed it again, I noticed it last night and it has continued today. Soon after my BFP (about 11/2-2 weeks ago) I started feeling cramps allover, but also specifially on my left side about 2-3 inches from my hip bone. The cramping comes and goes and is relly mild. A few times I have felt stronger/pulling sensations that I assumed were RLP. I had cramping with DS, but can't remember exactly what it felt like/where it was located. I know that brown blood signifies old blood so I am trying not to worry to much, but I am terrified it is an ectopic pregnancy or something. My first appointment isn't until August 6 (at 8 weeks 2 days). I have called the nurse line twice today and left messages, but no one has contacted me back. I am really nervous and just wanted to see if anyone else has experienced this and what the outcome was. Thanks!

laur84ns

@sew322 I had an ectopic pregnancy last November. I didn't notice anything amiss symptom-wise until 6w5d, when I had a spot or two of red blood. I had no cramping and no brown spotting with my EP. 
I did have lots of brown spotting with my pregnancy 3 years ago, which resulted in my DD. 
The major "sign" for me that something wasn't right during my EP was that my pregnancy tests were taking a long time to darken and the Clearblue Weeks Estimator took a long time to go from 1-2 to 2-3 weeks, and never hit 3+ weeks. 
What I did when I felt something was amiss was drive myself to the ER (my dr was out of town). I felt a bit silly for doing so but when I found out it was an EP I was relieved that if trusted my gut. When in doubt, call your dr or go to the hospital. A ruptured ectopic can be very dangerous. 
I wish you the best of luck and hope all is well with your pregnancy!

sew322

@laur84ns Thanks. My cramping seems to be lessening. I took about 20 hpt and they progressed nicely. This pregnancy is just differnet from DS, I know each is different,but it is just throwing me off. I think I will just wait and relax and see what happens. Thanks for responding. 

laur84ns

@sew322 no problem! Trust me, I know how worrying the first trimester can be. After my experience last fall I'm pretty anxious about this pregnancy. 
I forgot to mention that I had lots of cramping with my successful pregnancy. To me, your symptoms definitely sound more like my successful pregnancy than my EP.  

sew322

@laur84ns You have NO idea how relieving that is to hear. I go through phases where I'm freaking out and then I'm calm and think everything is normal. Sometimes you just need a little reassurance. Lol. 

JLaVO888

I’ve had a ton of cramping with this pregnancy as well. 

ashley14598

I have had a lot of cramping with this pregnancy as well esp weeks 4 & 5. So much I had to sit down but it’s getting better! 

a_fauver

This is not pregnancy related but I’ve known a lot of friends who have used his app and used FB for easier access. Is there a page started for March 2019? I’d love to keep in contact that way as well! 

meggyme

@a_fauver that will probably come later when we’re a bit more comfortable with everyone knowing our full names and more personal info. We’ve got to weed out the crazies and the catfish first.

JLaVO888

@a_fauver My last BMB didn’t make the switch until the very end of our pregnancies. By then there were only 40 of us that were really active so it was nice to have a small group of people we trusted. 

hummingbird35

What are you guys’ opinions on N/A beer or wine? I’m going to ask my OB when I see him this week, but just curious how the ladies on the board approach this. 

a_fauver

@meggyme @JLaVO888 sounds good! 

laur84ns

@flyingmombula My go-to trick at a party or BBQ lately is to sip on a glass of the dealcoholised wine they sell at the grocery store (I'm in Canada so we don't have actual liquor/beer/wine in our grocery stores). We don't plan on telling family until 12 weeks so it's the only way I've been able to stave off suspicion! It works better when I'm in my own house, but I've taken it poured into a growler of cider to a BBQ before and pretended to be drinking alcoholic cider. It also helps to have something to sip on since I normally would have a few drinks when we have people over. 
I cant imagine why it wouldn't be ok/safe during pregnancy? The stuff I'm talking about doesn't have any alcohol in it at all. (I just quadruple- checked the label!)
Im not much of a beer drinker, but a friend who was pregnant last summer did sip on the occasional non-alcoholic beer when she really felt the urge (I believe those have a trace amount of alcohol in them).
Hope that helps!