October 2018 Moms

Questions 3/2

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Re: Questions 3/2

  • I'm a step mom as well, and would feel really weird about my husband going on vacation with his ex. I get it, and why you want to though. Would you be totally against your SO going to? I think blended families who can get along like that are great (even if I doubt mine ever will be). I just worry your SO might feel left out. I know I would. I try my hardest to be a good mother figure to my step son, and it's hard to know that I will always be second no matter how much I do for him.
  • I'm a step mom as well, and would feel really weird about my husband going on vacation with his ex. I get it, and why you want to though. Would you be totally against your SO going to? I think blended families who can get along like that are great (even if I doubt mine ever will be). I just worry your SO might feel left out. I know I would. I try my hardest to be a good mother figure to my step son, and it's hard to know that I will always be second no matter how much I do for him.
    It's not that I wouldn't want him to go but he would need to save his PTO for when the baby is born. He works in construction so it's harder for him to take days off. 
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  • @momtbx2 Also a stepmom. We get along fine with my husband’s ex and are able to parent as a team and her and I are cool.... but I would never be ok with this. I would actually find it incredibly inappropriate. If you want to do something with your first before the baby is born, I would do it just the two of you. 

    E will be 18 on July 24th
    Z was born October 16, 2016
    #3 Due October 9, 2018

    MC - November 29, 2012
    CP - November 15, 2014
    D&C for MMC - October 13, 2015




  • momtobx2 said:
    I have a 5 year old from my first marriage and we get a long great. My question is, would it be weird to go on a "family" vacation this summer just the 3 of us? We did it last year but my SO and I had only been together for a little while. I want to be able to take a vacation before this baby comes and SO needs to save his PTO.
    Honestly- that is going to be something that is unique to you, your ex, and your current SO. Some people will be okay with it, some will not.

    My suggestion would be, assuming SO and ex are amicable, to suggest a family vacation including all four of you.  Allow SO to make his own decision regarding his leave. 
  • momtobx2 said:
    I have a 5 year old from my first marriage and we get a long great. My question is, would it be weird to go on a "family" vacation this summer just the 3 of us? We did it last year but my SO and I had only been together for a little while. I want to be able to take a vacation before this baby comes and SO needs to save his PTO.
    Honestly- that is going to be something that is unique to you, your ex, and your current SO. Some people will be okay with it, some will not.

    My suggestion would be, assuming SO and ex are amicable, to suggest a family vacation including all four of you.  Allow SO to make his own decision regarding his leave. 
    Very true. I will discuss with SO and see what he says. Thanks for the advice
  • @momtobx2 Disclaimer, I'm not in one of these relationships, nor did I grow up in a divorced household.

    Do you think that it might confuse your 5-year old? That seems like a lot to process for someone so young, and they might not totally understand why you guys can go on vacation together, but you can't live together. Just a thought!
  • stithof said
    @momtobx2 Disclaimer, I'm not in one of these relationships, nor did I grow up in a divorced household.

    Do you think that it might confuse your 5-year old? That seems like a lot to process for someone so young, and they might not totally understand why you guys can go on vacation together, but you can't live together. Just a thought!
    I thought of it more as although mommy and daddy don't live together, we can still get along for him and are able to take him somewhere awesome for vacation.
  • @momtobx2 That might be the case for your kiddo. But in general, from a developmental standpoint, that's a pretty difficult concept to grasp at his/her age.

    Furthermore, it might be a good bonding experience for your current husband and child. Allowing the child to experience the new family dynamics might be more beneficial in the long run.
  • I'm 7+4 today and I have been feeling so sick today. I thought I was hungry but that didn't fix the problem. I'm wearing maternity pants today, so I'm hoping it's just because they're a little tight and that nothing is wrong. 
  • momtobx2 said:
    stithof said
    @momtobx2 Disclaimer, I'm not in one of these relationships, nor did I grow up in a divorced household.

    Do you think that it might confuse your 5-year old? That seems like a lot to process for someone so young, and they might not totally understand why you guys can go on vacation together, but you can't live together. Just a thought!
    I thought of it more as although mommy and daddy don't live together, we can still get along for him and are able to take him somewhere awesome for vacation.
    My SS wanted my H and the ex together until he was 13. I would tread carefully. Some kids have a very hard time giving up on that dream even after they stop vocalizing it. 

    E will be 18 on July 24th
    Z was born October 16, 2016
    #3 Due October 9, 2018

    MC - November 29, 2012
    CP - November 15, 2014
    D&C for MMC - October 13, 2015




  • Question: How long does it take the B6+ Unisom to cut the nausea? I started it last night, and I swear I'm feeling worse today. I also think the Unisom made me sleep worse not better. Should I persevere, or give up on this idea?
    ***TW***
    DD born April 2015 after many rounds of IVF and losses.

    After much more of the same...

  • It's such a tricky situation. It really does depend on the family and relationships. However, I know it would confuse my 6yo.

    I just recently found my bio-dad. My husband and I were talking (with my SS in the car) about how I want to get everyone together for a gender reveal, but I feel weird inviting my dad over when my mom and step-dad will be there. My step son chimed in "I understand how you feel". It was so unexpected for him to voice his feelings about it. He explained (in as much clarity as a 6yo can) that he understands how it's hard to have your mommy and daddy in the same place since they don't live together. 
  • Question: How long does it take the B6+ Unisom to cut the nausea? I started it last night, and I swear I'm feeling worse today. I also think the Unisom made me sleep worse not better. Should I persevere, or give up on this idea?
    I felt the same way. I did continue it for about a week and a half to see if it would change, but it did not. That being said, I did not feel better when I stopped, so I think for me the feeling worse was just a natural progression and not as a result of the medication, but it certainly did not seem to help.
  • @muchwanted It took about 5 days for it to work for me. I'm only taking it at night though so it only works for the morning nausea. I'm still throwing up every night and I'm pretty miserable during the day. I stopped taking the B6 during the day because it made no difference for me. 
  • For your OB visits what did the nurse visit consist of? They said it would be an hour visit and then I would see the doctor afterwards.  I had an 8 week US today with the OB and she also gave me all my lab orders, reviewed OTC medications, nausea/vomiting tips and when to call.  She answered questions and discussed 1st trimester screening. 

    My next visit is at 11 weeks and will be my new OB visit with the nurse first and then with the doctor. I did not meet with a nurse last time so just curious as to what we could possibly be doing for a whole hour.
  • KFrobKFrob member
    @drb2424 My next appointment is with the nurse practitioner and its at 10w4d.  Its the actual gyno exam, like a yearly physical and they've also sent me for labs.  So it sounds like that's what it must be.  
  • @drb2424 My nurse visit was about an hour. A good 15 mins was spent on my personal history, depression screening, if I felt safe at home etc. My husband was not allowed in with me. After he was allowed in the nurse went into extremely detailed family history which took a while. After that she gave me a punch of pamphlets and went over the first tri screening and the labs they were ordering.
  • @drb2424 my first appointment was a whole hour. They went through my entire health history, pregnancy and birth history and did an exam. They also gave me tons of info. Plus labs.
  • My first appointment wasnt very long at all. Just a normal pap, pelvic and breast exam. Dr gave is some info on the first trimester screen and answered any questions we had. Although, it may make a difference that I've been going to his office most of the last 10 years and my mom also goes there. So they have all my info. He's the Dr who delivered me and all my siblings.
  • Thanks everyone! I actually talked to the nurse yesterday because I had to reschedule my appointment and she told me it was basically what all you ladies said, she will review health history and review pregnancy plan of appointments, screening tests and a booklet the office provides.  Then I will meet with my OB and have a 12 week ultrasound and review any labs that came back from my previous visit.  :)
  • edited March 2018
    Ok so I have a red patch of skin on my chin for the past few days. Doesn't seem dry, doesn't seem like a pimple (bigger area anyway, and I have been putting Lotion on it to see if it would help. Nope. Still there. Dr Google isn't helping and nothing I am concerned about to contact the Dr. More curious. 
    Edit for time
  • @SweetSweetTooth I have been getting red patches under my lip for the last couple of months. Not sure if it's the hormones? I'm going to ask my Dr. about it next time.
    Me 33 DH 41
    TTC since 2016
    Due: October 12, 2018
    Location: Ontario, Canada

  • @SweetSweetTooth Have you looked up Perioral Dermatitis? I had that over the summer and it was rough. Mine was mild, so it was just red patches, but it got worse over time until I finally figured out what it was. I don't know besides that since I obviously haven't seen your face. Lol
  • @acciocoffee I will look into that and let you know :) 
  • @acciocoffee I think that is what it is! It is very light as DH can't see it when I ask, but I know something is there. I was looking on Google for pregnancy issues but that one can be brought on by many things. None of which are related to my situation except hormones. Lol will do some more research and see what I should do. Thank you for the suggestion! 
  • If it is that. I recommend reading this post:
    https://www.karmacontinued.com/2015/05/perioral-dermatitis-treatment-my-story.html
    She also has a follow up post that was helpful. I used the cream she recommended which worked really well, but then I finally discovered that my issue was being caused by my face wash and not my toothpaste so I got the sulfur face wash she recommends and it went away within a few days. I still use it because it helps my acne a lot.
  • @acciocoffee OMG this is exactly what I have! I'm going to go out and get that cream tonight and try it. My skin has been awful below my lips so much it is causing me so much pain. Thanks for the article!
    Me 33 DH 41
    TTC since 2016
    Due: October 12, 2018
    Location: Ontario, Canada

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