So a FFFC about names- We don't have one picked (I mentioned my displeasure with my DH's lack of commitment to picking earlier) our a/s is Monday so once we know the sex we'll start seriously considering names. I don't have any strong convictions on names for either sex like I did last time so I'm lurking to see if I get any inspiration. Once we have a name picked we don't tell anybody what the name is, even family, until after the baby is born. Everybody has an opinion on the name be it good or bad and I don't care if the name I picked was your ex-girlfriends name in HS and she was a real b*tch. Once that name is attached to a sweet little baby people don't make those kind of comments which is why we keep it to ourselves. My sister managed to get the middle name out of me for the first one and for the second one she cornered me in the hallway the night before we went in for our scheduled induction and all I would give her was the middle initial. She thought she knew what the middle name was from the initial but she actually was wrong so the second time nobody knew a thing about the name. My mom was actually the one who told us initially to keep the name to ourselves because it's nobody's business but ours and I really like that notion!
@LaurenAnn0405, I'm 100% with you on this one. We told no one DS's name until after he was born. We will be keeping this one a secret as well. I like the notion of calling family to announce baby has arrived, the sex if not known, and what the name is! It adds so much excitement. Plus, I agree, that then no one can really judge the name as much or try to sway you ahead of time.
@LaurenAnn0405, I'm 100% with you on this one. We told no one DS's name until after he was born. We will be keeping this one a secret as well. I like the notion of calling family to announce baby has arrived, the sex if not known, and what the name is! It adds so much excitement. Plus, I agree, that then no one can really judge the name as much or try to sway you ahead of time.
All of this! We share initials but never names. The middle name here is not a surprise as we've always said we'd use the family name my husband and BIL have as their MNs, but that's it.
We gave my stepmom a list of about 10 potential names. She got excited about a few, but the husband ended up vetoing them later. She displayed a lot of dislike towards one of them, and I think that's the one we have decided to go with. Now it makes me kind of sad. I wish I hadn't shared any with her..
I told my Mom DSs name before he was born(Gabriel) and she kept saying things like- isn't that the angel of death? I have decided to only talk about it with DH and my kids this time.
DS thinks we are naming the twins max and ruby. There’s isn’t a lot I dislike more than that show and now he won’t stop calling them Max and Ruby. I guess it’s pretty funny lol
Yeah, I kind of regret telling IRL ppl we've told about our chosen names.... mostly the feedback has been really good, but I'm irritated at the 1 or 2 ppl who have made negative comments and they probably wouldn't have shared that post-birth. Also apparently my dad likes both but likes one better than the other so he thinks we should not give the "better" name to the first born because it gives one of them 2 advantages over the other? Um, what? Also, is there really an "advantage" to being born 5 minutes earlier??
All you people who are waiting to share names until the birth are doing it right. I need a time machine.
Interesting - I haven't had a single negative experience with telling people the name. Maybe I just got really lucky with the people being thoughtful or maybe the name is vanilla enough that no one really has strong feelings about it.
@antoto I'm glad to hear you haven't had that experience. I actually thought ours were vanilla too...? Honestly I think it's just that a lot of the people I know, especially in my family, are abrasive and judgmental, and don't know when to shut up. And this is something I was aware of before and should have kept in mind when deciding to tell people.
@antoto I'm glad to hear you haven't had that experience. I actually thought ours were vanilla too...? Honestly I think it's just that a lot of the people I know, especially in my family, are abrasive and judgmental, and don't know when to shut up. And this is something I was aware of before and should have kept in mind when deciding to tell people.
Like I just don't get giving people shit for baby names that they have already chosen. Unless there is something they might not be aware of (Oh, you want to name your daughter Isis? That's a lovely name, are you concerned about the negative connotations that name might have?) just leave people alone about it. If they already have their minds made up and they aren't asking for suggestions just keep it to yourself.
@vflux33 I think your dad is hilarious—don’t give the kid two advantages over his brother huh?? This has me sitting here trying to figure that out. ((Rolls eyes)). Honestly we didn’t tell anyone the name with DS for two reasons—my ILs were super pushy about how I must tell them what we were having like as.soon.as.we.found.out. And my FIL wanted a third if we were having a boy. Oh hi, you don’t actually get to name our kid. Thanks anyway. So we didn’t tell them the name and I made them wait over a week for what we were having because that’s obnoxious. Otherwise I might have, in all innocence told people our name and gotten an extra 20 weeks of people’s opinions over it. It didn’t stop anyone from telling us what to name DS for 20 weeks either. As it was, we still got comments about how he should have been a third after he was born and even after his first birthday, and my BIL refuses to call him by his given name or nickname and instead calls him a nickname that I personally don’t like. He also tries to get his kids to call DS by the wrong name.
Anyway, you may have still gotten these comments after having those precious boys anyway, so maybe the silver lining is that they will get it all out now before they are born?
@antoto 100% agree. At most when someone told me they were using a name I wasn't in love with, I thought, "Not my style, but OK", and out loud I said "Oh cute! You guys must be so excited." Like, how many names are really that bad, other than "Isis"?
@mdfarmchick Good point! I hope you're right. At least my ILs have been cool about the names so they either genuinely like them or are being tactful (not a common approach in my family). If I was getting shit about it from my ILs I'd be pissed, but the upside would be that MH wouldn't tolerate that either and since it's his family he'd deal with them instead of me having to!
I didn't sleep well last night and must be more out of it than I thought because when you said negative connotations to Isis my first thought was: haha
Unless someone is specifically asking for personal preference on names, I don’t understand why people need to offer their input. Unless it has the potential to be offensive and you know the parents well enough to understand they are just unaware, then leave it be. For example A friend wanted to name her baby Arian, I mentioned the association with the the Nazi party and she was totally unaware. Still named her kid Ar.rian though...and pronounces it the same
I didn't sleep well last night and must be more out of it than I thought because when you said negative connotations to Isis my first thought was: haha
I mean, the thought that comes to mind when I hear the name Isis is always the America's Next Top Model contestant. She was the first transgender person I think I ever remembered seeing on mainstream TV and I always that that was pretty cool.
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Unless someone is specifically asking for personal preference on names, I don’t understand why people need to offer their input. Unless it has the potential to be offensive and you know the parents well enough to understand they are just unaware, then leave it be. For example A friend wanted to name her baby Arian, I mentioned the association with the the Nazi party and she was totally unaware. Still named her kid Ar.rian though...and pronounces it the same
My husband’s family is giving him a giant hard time and I hate seeing how it gets to him. He is the youngest of 5 and his sisters still treat him like their silly little brother but he is a 49 year old man and this baby’s dad! I know our name (Romeo) is polarizing, I see instantly people either loving it or not but being polite anyway, but the few people who have actually made it clear they don’t like it, or suggested something else just baffle me.
@Gingermom15 She should have spelled it Ariane if she really was attached to the name. Ariane is a real name and giving the e at the end makes it clearly Ari-ann rather than you know... Aryan.
My husband told me last night his aunt didn’t like the name we have as a top contender . She even has gone so far as to suggest other names ! It’s fine if someone doesn’t like the name we chose but don’t go on and on about it ! It’s our kid not hers. I’m sorry but if someone decides to voice their dislike to me in a rude way I’m going to tell them that’s their opinion which they are entitled to but we won’t be changing the name because they knew someone with that name who was crazy or whatever . In summary , I don’t give a shit what other people think ! Sorry for the rant - my husbands aunt really pissed me off .
Me: 36 DH: 37 Married: 5.27.16 Baby Boy Due: 3.18.18
Anyone else feel like their child will probably be unnamed forever? we haven't even talked about names in over a month now because we don't agree on anything lol! Also... what's everyones opinion on this.. DH and I have k/c names and DS has a c name. Our girl name we've had forever is also a k name so if baby 3 were to be a girl we'd for sure be using it. Should we name our current boy a c/k name also?? Or just pick whatever? I can't decide!
@scoogy19, I like matchy names to a point. If they all have a hard C/K sound, then I think you should run with that.
A friend of mine had him and his wife with A names and their 2 kids as well. Then they got pregnant with their 3rd and were going to give him a name starting with a Q. I was like really?? They ended up changing to an A name.
@justkeeptrying yes, all the names are the hard k/c sound. That's what I'm afraid of is if number 3 is a girl and we use that k name than the middle child would be weird to have a random letter when everyone else has the same sound! I have several k/c names that I like so just gotta get DH on board...
My husband’s family is giving him a giant hard time and I hate seeing how it gets to him. He is the youngest of 5 and his sisters still treat him like their silly little brother but he is a 49 year old man and this baby’s dad! I know our name (Romeo) is polarizing, I see instantly people either loving it or not but being polite anyway, but the few people who have actually made it clear they don’t like it, or suggested something else just baffle me.
I think Romeo is sweet and adorable. It's not that uncommon a name. I'm mad at your in laws for you now!
@bettyvonsomethingstein OMG I forgot about her. That's totally awesome. I mean, one could make the argument of reclaiming an ancient name and make sure the kid is educated and able to simply explain what her names means in her family. But it would be a challenge...
@scoogy19 I’d just go with a name you like, don’t settle on a name you feel meh on just because it begins with a certain letter. My sister, the father of her kids/her ex both have A names and their daughter has an A name too, but they named their son with an E name. He is 6 now and he couldn’t care less, they even call him “E” sometimes as a nickname and he likes it. Also if it is for a middle child maybe even better to have a different letter to make him feel special
@scoogy19 I’d just go with a name you like, don’t settle on a name you feel meh on just because it begins with a certain letter. My sister, the father of her kids/her ex both have A names and their daughter has an A name too, but they named their son with an E name. He is 6 now and he couldn’t care less, they even call him “E” sometimes as a nickname and he likes it. Also if it is for a middle child maybe even better to have a different letter to make him feel special
Agree with this. Not to mention that the person your kid will grow to be will spend the vast majority of their lives NOT living in the context of their siblings. Priority should definitely be on giving the kid a great name, not as much how their name sounds in relation to other other kids.
@antoto good point!!! I always thought it was weird when people insisted their kids' names had to "go together" so I don't know why I'm thinking so hard about this lol!
@antoto, I agree but also disagree. The nickname for my favorite boy name right now basically rhymes with my baby's nickname, and I just cannnnnnnottttttt do it. My husband has two cousins who have almost exactly the same first name except for one letter. Both are great names on her own, but when trying to identify who the eff is being talked about or spoken to, it's a nightmare. So in that sense, the name in relation to siblings does matter quite a bit.
But as as far as worrying about "going together," yeah, fugggggetttaboutit.
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I think if the same two parents are picking names together for all the kids, they will naturally go together. I just can't imaging parents picking something really classic for one kid, like James, and then naming the next kid something modern like Tate.
Even if that did happen I might raise an eyebrow for a tenth of a second, think "huh," and move on. There are just more important things to worry about in this world!
So far the only name DH and I have agreed on for longer than a day is Ada. Would you pronounce it A-da or Ay-da?
I almost picked this name! It's pronounced Ay-da. I adore this name.
I wonder if the majority would know how to pronounce the name? We don’t want her to correct people everyday, either. We love the name, too! Middle name is Ruth, so Ada Ruth Blain isn’t too much of a mouthful.
So far the only name DH and I have agreed on for longer than a day is Ada. Would you pronounce it A-da or Ay-da?
I almost picked this name! It's pronounced Ay-da. I adore this name.
I wonder if the majority would know how to pronounce the name? We don’t want her to correct people everyday, either. We love the name, too! Middle name is Ruth, so Ada Ruth Blain isn’t too much of a mouthful.
You will inevitably get a few people who don't know how to pronounce it. But I think the majority will. We are going with Elise and there are slight variations to how people pronounce that name too. I think unless you go with names like "Sarah" or "Katie" you will just have a few people who fumble it. I think it's such a lovely name you shouldn't be scared off by that!
Re: Name Thread 2.0
So a FFFC about names- We don't have one picked (I mentioned my displeasure with my DH's lack of commitment to picking earlier) our a/s is Monday so once we know the sex we'll start seriously considering names. I don't have any strong convictions on names for either sex like I did last time so I'm lurking to see if I get any inspiration. Once we have a name picked we don't tell anybody what the name is, even family, until after the baby is born. Everybody has an opinion on the name be it good or bad and I don't care if the name I picked was your ex-girlfriends name in HS and she was a real b*tch. Once that name is attached to a sweet little baby people don't make those kind of comments which is why we keep it to ourselves. My sister managed to get the middle name out of me for the first one and for the second one she cornered me in the hallway the night before we went in for our scheduled induction and all I would give her was the middle initial. She thought she knew what the middle name was from the initial but she actually was wrong so the second time nobody knew a thing about the name. My mom was actually the one who told us initially to keep the name to ourselves because it's nobody's business but ours and I really like that notion!
All you people who are waiting to share names until the birth are doing it right. I need a time machine.
Anyway, you may have still gotten these comments after having those precious boys anyway, so maybe the silver lining is that they will get it all out now before they are born?
@mdfarmchick Good point! I hope you're right. At least my ILs have been cool about the names so they either genuinely like them or are being tactful (not a common approach in my family). If I was getting shit about it from my ILs I'd be pissed, but the upside would be that MH wouldn't tolerate that either and since it's his family he'd deal with them instead of me having to!
haha
For example A friend wanted to name her baby Arian, I mentioned the association with the the Nazi party and she was totally unaware. Still named her kid Ar.rian though...and pronounces it the same
I guess, in her mind, the spelling made it all better.
Sorry for the rant - my husbands aunt really pissed me off .
Married: 5.27.16
Baby Boy Due: 3.18.18
A friend of mine had him and his wife with A names and their 2 kids as well. Then they got pregnant with their 3rd and were going to give him a name starting with a Q. I was like really?? They ended up changing to an A name.
@bettyvonsomethingstein OMG I forgot about her. That's totally awesome. I mean, one could make the argument of reclaiming an ancient name and make sure the kid is educated and able to simply explain what her names means in her family. But it would be a challenge...
But as as far as worrying about "going together," yeah, fugggggetttaboutit.
Even if that did happen I might raise an eyebrow for a tenth of a second, think "huh," and move on.