@kswiger06 oh I totally used to use the phrase " you get what you get and you don't get upset" with the younger kids I taught! And I am for sure implementing that in our house as well.
When our kids first started school, we were about pulling our hair out with all the new phrases they were trying to use at home. This one though has been very beneficial with a lot of things like supper, flavored drinks, snacks, lol our daughter even got my husband once when I made spaghetti and he grumbled lol
@Spicyweiner i am sure there are many many things that I will cave on or change my mind about once parenting is actually here.
but it there's some stuff that is just completely against what i believe/my values. i hope those don't change. although they might. we shall see. i am sure it's about to be an insane ride.
Me: 36, H: 37 FTM, 2 Furbabies married 03/17/07 lived in Houston, Austin, Los Angeles and NYC due: 2/15/17
Facebook for some reason is showing me lots of ads for the most amazing kids' beds that look like treehouses and castle forts and stuff. I want, but we have nice twin beds in the basement so that'll be the plan unless there's a good reason to do otherwise. I hadn't even though about the fact that just providing the bed as opposed to making him part of the process could make the transition tougher. Oh well. Hopefully picking out a bedding set will keep him happy.
I can't wait to come back here down the road and read all the "I'm going to be THIS type of parent" ish and chuckle.
LOLz. My biggest thing was I hated Disney Princess crap. That licensed/commercialized pink and poofy- gross! Yeah, nothing makes my girls happier than a Cinderella tee shirt or an Elsa&Anna blanket. Their bedroom is decorated in Disney Princess. Literally, that's the "theme". 6 years ago me is screaming in deep pain and shame.
DD1- Aug11 Angel Baby- June13, said goodbye Oct12 DD2- Aug13 DD3- due Feb17
@Spicyweiner i am sure there are many many things that I will cave on or change my mind about once parenting is actually here.
but it there's some stuff that is just completely against what i believe/my values. i hope those don't change. although they might. we shall see. i am sure it's about to be an insane ride.
So much will change, and you won't even realize it until one day you are in her room surrounded by pink shit, with an IKEA bed she picked, and more toys than you know where to put. What?? No, I'm not talking about me.......
@peachesnbean OMG! that would be my worst nightmare also. LOL.
but decorating in what their interest is, is totally different to me than letting a toddler/child decide on a piece of furniture that i am paying for. or for me to feel the need/pressure to get them what they want. if i want to get it for them, great! but i will not be dictated to by the wants of a child.
me=asshole mom
but i am willing to come back here if we are all still around in 4 years (for multiple reasons) and admit i caved if i do.
Me: 36, H: 37 FTM, 2 Furbabies married 03/17/07 lived in Houston, Austin, Los Angeles and NYC due: 2/15/17
My kids frequently hear that phrase too. I pick out all of their bedding and stuff because if I didn't they would want to update to new stuff constantly. I tend to buy stuff that will last them a while and isn't a theme they will hate in a year. They have yet to complain and I don't see them growing out of the styles anytime soon. Plus I don't want them to have super themed rooms that in 2 years will be too baby-ish. My girls share a room right now and the boy has his own room.
@peachesnbean oh thats not too bad at all. the pink might drive me crazy. but you did a good job keeping it minimal.
i also feel like I'm not expressing this the rights way. i am open to buy my kid something that they want if they need it. but i am not buying my kid a new bed because they are sick of their old one, as expressed by PP FIL
Me: 36, H: 37 FTM, 2 Furbabies married 03/17/07 lived in Houston, Austin, Los Angeles and NYC due: 2/15/17
+1 to not being 100% baby ready. I told DH we need to get our butts in gear after Christmas, or else, we will be ordering an Amazon prime crib while in the hospital!
Also, +1 to all the crazy boy mom penis stuff! My boys were asking me what balls were for the other day and why they had them.
Can we talk about kids sharing rooms? It seems like we have a couple of ladies on here with kids that shared rooms. DS is 2.5 and when I found out that I'm having another boy, several friends have said that we should bunk them up because it makes them grow up as better friends. Would you chose to bunk up same sex sibs even if you have the space not to?
Can we talk about kids sharing rooms? It seems like we have a couple of ladies on here with kids that shared rooms. DS is 2.5 and when I found out that I'm having another boy, several friends have said that we should bunk them up because it makes them grow up as better friends. Would you chose to bunk up same sex sibs even if you have the space not to?
We bunked ours, but we didn't have the room not to. They still share a room at 6 & 7. It's easier now than at the baby stage. When #2 was younger and would wake up crying, he would wake #1 up a lot. And we also missed out on the self soothing thing so they are both a bit spoiled kids and need mom or dad to put them to bed.
We put our 2 oldest together then #2 was 18 months old and started climbing out of her crib. So they were 18 months and around 4 years old. We physically didn't bunk their beds until the oldest was 6 for safety reasons(because I fell out of a bunk bed and needed stitches when I was young). They were both good sleepers by the time they were put together. They had 2 twin beds which we ended up pushing together because they always ended up in 1 bed together anyway. It was cute they always wanted to snuggle. I still occasionally find them sleeping together. I don't think I would personally put a baby in with an older child until they were sleeping through the night because I want my older kids to get good sleep. Obviously some people don't have the luxury of having the extra rooms to separate them though.
Dd and new baby will probably share eventually. We have four bedrooms though, so for now baby is getting her own room. We've talked about a few years down the road though putting them in the same room so we could use the other as a playroom or guest room again. But we'll see how it goes.
I just knew I would be an asshole parent until my son managed to out-asshole me over and over and I ended up caving many times to save my sanity and his.
I'm late to the party but @LivingLaVidaGinger if you're still friends with this chic a few years down the road and she's pregnant, feel free to bring up her comments on how cute she always thought she'd dress *eyeroll* what a twatwaffle.
I've been dealing with a sick dad and ended up staying at his house for a few days. I didn't have multiple outfits with me, so I stayed in DH's ratty sweatpants and my dad's big Tshirts paired with muddy snowboots for running errands. I was comfy as hell, full stop. Good thing I didn't have a doctor's appointment though
I was out to breakfast with DH after our OB appt this morning and I was watching this poor mother try to wrangle her whiny, and rather bratty toddler son who seemed to think the entire restaurant was a playground, and her infant daughter. She tries to breastfeed the daughter several times and is struggling to get baby still while simultaneously answering question after question by this rowdy toddler. All while dad sips his coffee and chats away with the rest of the party (there were like 12 people). She can't get the baby to nurse and is fighting and getting tangled with her nursing cover and eventually her baby gets fussy. The moment their breakfast comes out, the baby starts crying and the son is screaming for his pancakes to be cut. So after handing their daughter to the dad, she cuts the pancakes for her son, then proceeds to leave her own hot plate to calm her daughter while her H is chowing down on his still hot food and laughing away with the rest of the family. Watching this makes me truly hope my H is a better man than hers and doesn't just ignore my struggling with our kids when that time comes. Also watching her plate sit there and get cold makes me realize how overwhelmingly unprepared I am for parenthood.
I was out to breakfast with DH after our OB appt this morning and I was watching this poor mother try to wrangle her whiny, and rather bratty toddler son who seemed to think the entire restaurant was a playground, and her infant daughter. She tries to breastfeed the daughter several times and is struggling to get baby still while simultaneously answering question after question by this rowdy toddler. All while dad sips his coffee and chats away with the rest of the party (there were like 12 people). She can't get the baby to nurse and is fighting and getting tangled with her nursing cover and eventually her baby gets fussy. The moment their breakfast comes out, the baby starts crying and the son is screaming for his pancakes to be cut. So after handing their daughter to the dad, she cuts the pancakes for her son, then proceeds to leave her own hot plate to calm her daughter while her H is chowing down on his still hot food and laughing away with the rest of the family. Watching this makes me truly hope my H is a better man than hers and doesn't just ignore my struggling with our kids when that time comes. Also watching her plate sit there and get cold makes me realize how overwhelmingly unprepared I am for parenthood.
I hate seeing stuff like this. She shouldnt have to ask for help from her H or anyone else but there were at least 11 assholes at that table. H should have done something but I'd tell my H to take care of the toddler. Or cry. I might cry.
Seeing stuff like that also drives me crazy. I totally expect more from my husband than that in all aspects of our life and that will include childcare duties. I think the husband should have stepped up - but also the woman needed to tell him what she needed at that moment instead of just dealing without him.
@LivingLaVidaGinger communication is key to ty and avoid those situations. My H is really good about helping with DS without me asking, but this has come after several conversations. There have been moments where I was that mom(thankfully with only the one kid... so far). Honestly I feel as though most men fall into the habit of not helping unless being asked because most moms fall into the habit of doing everything. I'm very much an "I've got it person", but once I had DS, I had to talk to my H and tell him I don't always "have it". I feel like certain aspects of parenting take longer for men to develop than woman... and from my experience this seems to be one of those aspects.
Also to add this doesn't mean I agree with said dad in that situation.. if they have a toddler and a newborn he should definitely be on his game at this point.
@kirstynikole totally agree that communication is key. I think it goes even further back to the idea of the dad "helping," though - you don't help, dude, you parent. If you're not parenting equally, in this situation or any other, then you're being an absolute fuckface. I also want to know what the hell was wrong with the rest of the party, that not a single person could get their shit together to distract the toddler for five minutes.
I'd like to say I can't wait to see what would happen if my husband tried to pull that kind of shit, but then I realized I didn't marry a total douche canoe.
@kirstynikole +1 to communication is key. That being said, my H has ADHD so I sometimes have to remind him to not take over the whole conversation and help
This reminds me of one time when I was going out out and Mil said "oh, is D( my H) babysitting?" H said: "no, Mom. I'm her Dad, not her babysitter" :::swoon:::
@kirstynikole totally agree that communication is key. I think it goes even further back to the idea of the dad "helping," though - you don't help, dude, you parent. If you're not parenting equally, in this situation or any other, then you're being an absolute fuckface. I also want to know what the hell was wrong with the rest of the party, that not a single person could get their shit together to distract the toddler for five minutes.
I'd like to say I can't wait to see what would happen if my husband tried to pull that kind of shit, but then I realized I didn't marry a total douche canoe.
+1 to everything everyone else has already said. in keeping with today's theme of me as asshole mom, this is when I call him out at the table. cause i'd rather be an asshole than a martyr. I'm not gonna suffer silently
Me: 36, H: 37 FTM, 2 Furbabies married 03/17/07 lived in Houston, Austin, Los Angeles and NYC due: 2/15/17
Oh yeah, that poor mom, but husband man up! That reminds me of my own Dad though, when we go out to eat with them we have 3 kids that need food cut up or ketchup poured, etc, and I am working on that and my mom has another, and my DH is taking someone to the bathroom and my Dad just starts eating. He has to be told what to do and he is s parent! Or I am running around at dinner getting drinks together and my husband has finished half his dinner. This is especially irritating while I am pregnant, lol.
Married - 7/29/06 Ben and Maggie - 4/10/09 Mia - 6/16/11 Surprise! due 2/23/17
I think @BeckS13 has more of a people are saying they want to get it, not being gift grabby, but wanting follow through on a better time frame and I get that.
I agree though, you need a car seat more than anything and a place for baby to sleep. Get those and don't stress!
That's pretty much exactly it. I am not expecting gifts from ANYONE, I was fully expecting to have to get everything on my own anyway. MIL is insisting she has to buy me something because it's her first grandchild, and I appreciate that, please don't get me wrong. The problem is her and my FIL are divorced, and they're bickering about what they're going to go halvsies on. I have even expressed to my MIL that I am okay to get it on my own and she doesn't have to worry, she won't have any of it. She wants to buy something end of story. That's what's getting me frustrated. For those suggesting I buy something I can return, well I frankly hadn't thought of that. I am going to have to look up Costco's policies on returning something you've ordered online, because that might actually be the best course of action right now. I really didn't mean to come off as a brat, I am grateful for any help I get, it's just the fact that my MIL won't budge and her and my FIL keep arguing back and forth that has me really annoyed with it all.
There's an entertaining thread on July17, if anyone is interested. I think you can find it
ETA omg it's gone now!! BGs do that?!
It looks like the follow up thread is titled "just for fun" but I didn't get to read the original thread .. I did read a couple fun threads over there though. They have some funny ladies!!
Edit... did you know that a couple other bmbs have Llama drama or alpaca threads or whatever.... they literally lurk all sorts of forums and boards and post about drama they find. I think I saw them in June and July? It's pretty entertaining... oh and I see a few other bmbs think they are the mean girls of 2017 lol
Sorry, went to bed! Someone posted a 12w u/s pic and the board responded exactly as you'd expect. But OP flipped her shit. Couldn't delete so she changed the thread title to something like "where all the whores gang up on one person" or something. GBCB, etc.
ETA: 12w us asking the board to tell her baby's sex
Re: Weekly Randoms (12/19)
FTM, 2 Furbabies
married 03/17/07
lived in Houston, Austin, Los Angeles and NYC
due: 2/15/17
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/30-songs-spotify-says-you-should-listen-to-while-giving-birth_us_56d84dd1e4b0000de403786e
but it there's some stuff that is just completely against what i believe/my values. i hope those don't change. although they might. we shall see. i am sure it's about to be an insane ride.
FTM, 2 Furbabies
married 03/17/07
lived in Houston, Austin, Los Angeles and NYC
due: 2/15/17
What?? No, I'm not talking about me.......
but decorating in what their interest is, is totally different to me than letting a toddler/child decide on a piece of furniture that i am paying for. or for me to feel the need/pressure to get them what they want. if i want to get it for them, great! but i will not be dictated to by the wants of a child.
me=asshole mom
but i am willing to come back here if we are all still around in 4 years (for multiple reasons) and admit i caved if i do.
FTM, 2 Furbabies
married 03/17/07
lived in Houston, Austin, Los Angeles and NYC
due: 2/15/17
i also feel like I'm not expressing this the rights way. i am open to buy my kid something that they want if they need it. but i am not buying my kid a new bed because they are sick of their old one, as expressed by PP FIL
FTM, 2 Furbabies
married 03/17/07
lived in Houston, Austin, Los Angeles and NYC
due: 2/15/17
+1 to not being 100% baby ready. I told DH we need to get our butts in gear after Christmas, or else, we will be ordering an Amazon prime crib while in the hospital!
Also, +1 to all the crazy boy mom penis stuff! My boys were asking me what balls were for the other day and why they had them.
I've been dealing with a sick dad and ended up staying at his house for a few days. I didn't have multiple outfits with me, so I stayed in DH's ratty sweatpants and my dad's big Tshirts paired with muddy snowboots for running errands. I was comfy as hell, full stop. Good thing I didn't have a doctor's appointment though
Watching this makes me truly hope my H is a better man than hers and doesn't just ignore my struggling with our kids when that time comes.
Also watching her plate sit there and get cold makes me realize how overwhelmingly unprepared I am for parenthood.
I'd like to say I can't wait to see what would happen if my husband tried to pull that kind of shit, but then I realized I didn't marry a total douche canoe.
H said: "no, Mom. I'm her Dad, not her babysitter"
:::swoon:::
FTM, 2 Furbabies
married 03/17/07
lived in Houston, Austin, Los Angeles and NYC
due: 2/15/17
ETA omg it's gone now!! BGs do that?!
Ben and Maggie - 4/10/09
Mia - 6/16/11
Surprise! due 2/23/17
For those suggesting I buy something I can return, well I frankly hadn't thought of that. I am going to have to look up Costco's policies on returning something you've ordered online, because that might actually be the best course of action right now.
I really didn't mean to come off as a brat, I am grateful for any help I get, it's just the fact that my MIL won't budge and her and my FIL keep arguing back and forth that has me really annoyed with it all.
It looks like the follow up thread is titled "just for fun" but I didn't get to read the original thread .. I did read a couple fun threads over there though. They have some funny ladies!!
Edit... did you know that a couple other bmbs have Llama drama or alpaca threads or whatever.... they literally lurk all sorts of forums and boards and post about drama they find. I think I saw them in June and July? It's pretty entertaining... oh and I see a few other bmbs think they are the mean girls of 2017 lol
ETA: 12w us asking the board to tell her baby's sex