On paternity leave: My husband runs a summer camp, and the baby is due the first week of camp! It's pretty stressful to think about. He works 12-16 hour days in the summer, and we live at the camp in a cabin. At least it's a beautiful place to take my maternity leave, and he's around (but busy) all day. My family is nearby, though, if we need help. I just hope DH has time to bond with the baby and enjoy the first few months.
After the camping season, he's on his own schedule. Year-round employee, but he works from home and he'll be able to provide childcare. The spring and fall can be busy with groups, too, but it's nothing like the summer!
Me: 29, DH: 31 Married: October 2014 Began TTC: April 2015 BFP #1: 9/18/15. EDD 5/18/16. MC 10/26/15. (9w) BFP #2: 2/27/16. EDD 11/7/16. MC/D&E 4/20/16 (11w) BFP #3: 9/22/16. EDD 5/29/17. DS born 4/24/17 BFP #4: 5/20/18. EDD 1/23/19.
@OmegaRose3 I've had a harder time with this pregnancy. I was finally getting back into the shape I wanted and finally getting free time to go out with girlfriends and getting more comfortable with DD being able to be a little more send sufficient. So when this came as a surprise I was just miserable for the first 8 or so weeks. I feel guilty for feeling that way, but I'm past that and to the excitement. Especially finding out the sex and feeling him move.
@OmegaRose3 it always takes me longer to connect to the pregnancy. I'm busy with DD1 and DD2 throughout most of the day and I feel like before I know the sex it's hard to imagine them in our everyday life. Once I start feeling kicks and movements all the time it makes it easier too!
Married 03.09.09 Sweet Baby H 12.21.11 Sassy Baby P 03.26.14 Little Brother Due 05.22.17
Loving the activity on the board today and the new faces!
Thanks everyone for the reassurance that I'm not a (totally) terrible wife! Maybe some "alone time" might be helpful for getting myself back in the groove.
As far as paternity leave, MH "thinks" he has 4 weeks but never seems too sure of his benefits - much to my Type A dismay... If he can, I'd like for him to take maybe two weeks for the birth and then 2 weeks when I go back to work so I have a LITTLE less to worry about. We'll see how it shakes out.
Just another Monday but feeling insanely happy to have a healthy 4 year well check for my oldest. On a more tragic note... my sister, who is a preschool teacher, found out this morning that one of the mom's passed away in her sleep in her late twenties this morning. The kids tried to wake her up. I mean, can you even imagine? She's known the woman for years and had both of her kids in her class. She's devastated and has been in tears all day. Just awful. She wasn't sick and they don't know yet what happened. Those poor babies. It really brings a rough day into perspective doesn't it? Wow.
@mamatowildones oh that's so terribly sad. An okay friend of mine who had a baby under a year old had passed away in her sleep unexpectly. It turned out she had a brain aneurysm. This was about 8 or so years ago. Positive thoughts to all those affected.
My oldest DD has two hours of gymnastics twice a week. The only seats are bleachers. My butt and back hurts. I can only imagine how uncomfortable this is going to start to become. Ugh.
Married 03.09.09 Sweet Baby H 12.21.11 Sassy Baby P 03.26.14 Little Brother Due 05.22.17
My oldest DD has two hours of gymnastics twice a week. The only seats are bleachers. My butt and back hurts. I can only imagine how uncomfortable this is going to start to become. Ugh.
Not to be mean but... do you always have to stay the whole time? My mom always just dropped me off at practices and classes etc. then would come back for me when it was over. Bleachers sound like murder. I would shameless get one of those cushions at least!
My DH only comes to the ultrasound appointments. Otherwise it's too difficult for him to break away from work. For paternity leave, he gets 10 days. And it has to be used within 30 days of birth. We recently found out that he has some military training for 3 weeks like 15 days after my due date and then 5 weeks of training when the baby is 3 months old. I'm hoping my mom is able to fly out, not so much for help with the baby but to help keep my older two occupied!
I thought you had up to a year to use the 10 days? We had friends who were duel military but she was getting out so he saved his paternity for when she went back and had to do her outprocessing. Plus if they are deployed they can take it when they come back.
Anyone get spider veins on their ribs during pregnancy? I just started noticing them about a week ago. It's a small "patch" on both sides of my ribcage of really tiny, dark veins. I'm not sure if this is a normal pregnancy thing?
Yep, but a little higher - between the boobs (almost like where the cups come up between them). Happened last time towards the end, then faded, now they're back in full force right away.
My DH only comes to the ultrasound appointments. Otherwise it's too difficult for him to break away from work. For paternity leave, he gets 10 days. And it has to be used within 30 days of birth. We recently found out that he has some military training for 3 weeks like 15 days after my due date and then 5 weeks of training when the baby is 3 months old. I'm hoping my mom is able to fly out, not so much for help with the baby but to help keep my older two occupied!
I thought you had up to a year to use the 10 days? We had friends who were duel military but she was getting out so he saved his paternity for when she went back and had to do her outprocessing. Plus if they are deployed they can take it when they come back.
I thought it was a year too! I also thought they voted to change it to 14 days but apparently that policy hasn't been officially adopted yet. A friend of ours just had a baby and he said he had to use it within 30 days unless he was deployed then it's different. Either way, he has block leave in between those trainings that he's planning on taking advantage of too so we can take the baby home to see family, just will have to be actual leave days instead of the free paternity ones. I was hoping we could stack them back to back!
Married 03.09.09 Sweet Baby H 12.21.11 Sassy Baby P 03.26.14 Little Brother Due 05.22.17
My oldest DD has two hours of gymnastics twice a week. The only seats are bleachers. My butt and back hurts. I can only imagine how uncomfortable this is going to start to become. Ugh.
Not to be mean but... do you always have to stay the whole time? My mom always just dropped me off at practices and classes etc. then would come back for me when it was over. Bleachers sound like murder. I would shameless get one of those cushions at least!
Not mean at all! I don't have to stay but traffic is pretty bad to and from so it would be half the time driving to spend an hour at home. I do run to Target when I have some stuff to pick up but Target twice a week wouldn't make my husband happy! Lol I'm definitely looking into those seat cushions!
Also it's a metal building so wifi/cell service is awful so I can't even spend my two hours to catch up on The Bump!
Married 03.09.09 Sweet Baby H 12.21.11 Sassy Baby P 03.26.14 Little Brother Due 05.22.17
@h&pmomma I think I'll feel more connected after we find out the sex, but it's like family are just not very interested in this pregnancy at all and probably won't be ubless I end up with a boy this time and I'm so busy with DD it feels foreign and weird this time.
I'm so glad it's not just me that feels this way though. @BeachMommy2B that's exactly where I'm at, just haven't found out the sex and I hope that it will help.
@OmegaRose3 YES. My parents are always asking me how I'm feeling or what not, but my brother doesn't have any kids yet so this is just grandbaby 3 for them. But my in-laws could care less! This will be grandbaby 10 for them and we already have two girls so they could care less except "when are you finding out if it's a boy?" So annoying.
Married 03.09.09 Sweet Baby H 12.21.11 Sassy Baby P 03.26.14 Little Brother Due 05.22.17
@h&pmomma Seriously! Everyone keeps saying they think it's going to be a girl if the topic is brought up and I just get this feeling that unless the baby is a boy, the excitement will stay about the same, which is very minimal. My own mother doesn't seem interested and she's usually my biggest supporter not counting DH. I feel like the excitement is what made things feel so real with DD. And now it's like I remember I'm pregnant when I get dressed or when everyone else is cracking open a beer.
I just renewed by my registration a couple of days ago, also late because it was due the 30th, and have now lost the stickers. It was raining when I got them so i was going to wait until it stopped and now I have no idea where I put them. Dumb.
DH went to 80% of the appointments with DD but so far hasn't been able to go to any this time. He's supposed to be at the anatomy scan in a couple weeks but that will probably be the only one this time.
Last time DH took 2 week after baby was born but had to use his vacation days. This time I think he will only take a week because we are going on a missions trip for a month roughly 6 weeks after baby is born, so he needs to save vacation days.
DD is RFing in the middle right now. After baby we will probably move her behind one of us and put the new baby behind the other seat. I don't quite trust her to keep her hands/toys/etc to herself.
Sex drive is slowly coming back finally! This week was the first time in a loooong time that I initiated and didn't feel like i was going through the motions as a "duty".
Nothing new pregnancy related, but we did Santa pictures last night and got the most epic picture ever! Thankfully it was at my MoMs club Christmas party so no crazy lines and it only cost us some canned goods for the food drive.
@CCNellans At the risk of sounding snarky, I'm sure your doctor has other more important matters to meet with patients about than getting you gender results before Christmas. I think more than 1/2 of this board is in the same boat as you. I have my anatomy scan 2 days after Christmas. I'd love it before, but that's the way it is. And honestly, you'll find out the gender eventually. That's just a bonus. I'm sure you know this, but anatomy scans aren't just for finding out the gender.
Which is exactly why I didn't push it and just said "Thank you, I will wait then!" and hung up.
This is my 2nd child so I know the drill, but it never hurts to ask.
DS Born 1/12/13 - Molar Pregnancy 3/2014/D&C 3/2015 - EDD with Baby #2 May 26th, 2017
@NotAPlaya-JustCrushAlot Get this instant pot! I LOVE mine!!! I use it probably five times a week at least. If you like yogurt , get the 7 in 1 because it has the yogurt function. Yogurt is so freaking easy to make and so much cheaper than buying it. And you know exactly what's in it. If you have any questions let me know! There's an instant pot Facebook group that is extremely helpful and I get recipe ideas from it all the time.
@Louise_Belcher not to be your mom but get that checked out! You don't want to mess with your vision.
My sex drive is nill. DH has been pretty cool about it but he's getting frustrated now I think. I may have to suck it up this week.
DH went to more appointments with my first pregnancy but he went to the appointment to confirm the pregnancy and he'll go to the anatomy scan. Has anyone taken a child to that one? Thinking of taking my three year old son but not sure if that's a terrible idea.
@champhe If DD is up from her nap in time for my anatomy scan then all three of will probably go. The practice has a big bowl of lollipops so we will grab some, plus bring her coloring book and crayons, and her tablet. Oh and snacks if they will allow it. The practice I go to seem to prefer that she stays contained in her stroller. They are very welcoming of all kids regardless of appointment type which is nice to see.
As for pregnancy announcements, I just posted mine the other day.
@champhe check with where you are having the ultrasound, most do not allow kids at all. My hospital will send you downstairs to check the kid into short term daycare if you show up with a child.
Oh and since my husband works in the clinic next door he shows up more often than not if he isn't already with a patient. Usually it's just to say hi to my doc and then he bounces. We aren't big about hearing the heartbeat and whatnot, as long as things are normal its business as usual.
My DH only came to the anatomy scan with DD. I was induced due to pre-e and he got there later in the day after I was admitted (there was no rush and I told him to finish up stuff with work). Military gets 10 days as others have said. DH 10 days started once we went home from the hospital. I was in the hospital 5 days.
DH hasn't been to any appointments this time and we are currently separated and in different states. Even if we were together he is in a special class and can't get time off.
I am not one that's super connected with pregnancy. I'm pretty visual and I obviously know I have a baby in me, but I'm not all warm and fuzzy about it. My daughter and I bonded after birth and she is still overly attached.
@champhe , I second @WombThereItIs --check with the ultrasound place, many do not allow kiddos (mine included). And my son is a bit of a wild child (and just over 2 years old)--I can only imagine the havoc he would create in a room with so many "fun toys". EEK! Obviously, every child is different!
You guys...I had a plan to stop suggesting names in hopes that my husband (who never suggests names, just nixes my suggestions and never seems thrilled with ANY names I suggest) would come around to my top name choice. After a week of no name talk, I said to him last night "So...what are we going to name this baby girl?" And he said "Estelle...of course that's what we're going with." WTF? My plan worked, and I'm thrilled, but we NEVER had a final name conversation. Or even something that was close to a final name conversation. I just stopped talking about it entirely. I guess that's a win for me?
And another thing...I'm TOTALLY dragging my feet about posting something pregnancy announcement related on Facebook and I have no idea why. With our first, we were so excited, especially because we have friends and family spread out all over the country that we wouldn't call individually to tell. This should be just as exciting, but for some reason, it seems a lot more...personal? Maybe I'll feel different after the anatomy scan next week...
This is going to be kind of an insane week for me. My company is up for sale and bids are due this week, so I'll be working long days without much time to get online. I probably won't be very active until next week, but I just wanted to swing by, say hi and say that I hope everyone has a fantastic week!
Ah, I'm so behind! I have a deadline this week and haven't had time to bump.
With our first, DH came to pretty much every appointment. With this one, he's just coming to the anatomy scan. Second child syndrome, I guess.
Getting on the Bump has made me realize how disconnected from this pregnancy I actually am. I haven't even thought about the nursery or the registry and haven't posted anything on Facebook. My family is really excited (we found out this one will be a girl) and they seem to talk about it a lot more than I do. I think it's just because I'm busy with DS and I have a hard time picturing how an actual baby is going to fit into our life. I think it will become more real when she starts moving around more.
I feel really connected to this pregnancy now. After we got the Panorama tests back, that's when most of my worry eased and I allowed myself to become excited! However, for me, that means feeling connected to the baby and how my body is changing. I honestly don't care about the nursery much. Is that weird? Yes, we plan to put up a crib and get furniture and do some decorating, but I think it's still aesthetically going to look similar to the rest of our house. Plus, the plan is to have crib and baby in our room for at least 6 months (if that works out), so I'm not even in a rush to get the room done.
Wow that was a lot to catch up on! I'm shocked by how many of your SO's go to appointments! We've had two losses but I still haven't felt like DH needed to go. He went to the first scan for each of our pregnancies and I don't think I asked him to come to any more for DD's and probably won't this time either unless something was wrong. I never know how long they will take and feel like I shouldn't interrupt him at work. I'm also surprised by how much time off your SO's get for paternity leave! My husband was accepting a new job when I was pregnant with DD and negotiated in a week after she was born, but I was in the hospital for 4 days of it so that flew bye. I'm assuming it will be the same this time, although I wish he had way more time!
Random question- I don't want to call my Dr because I am always worried about something, but- My daughter likes to play "ride a horsey" and bounce on my husband and I. I was laying on her floor this morning on my side and she came over and started playing, I let her play because I sat her high up on my rib cage on my side. Now I'm worried I shouldn't have let her bounce on me but I thought she was high enough at the time and figured my ribs would get most of it. Do you think its okay?! I'm having twins and have a short torso.
@Jkp7749 I was just reading about that last night after H rested his head on my stomach. Apparently short of a traumatic hit or car wreck, you can't really hurt baby(ies) as they're so cushioned in there. I still get a little nervous, but...hey.
@Jkp7749 I had my friend's toddler jump on me like that when I was around 15 wks with the twins. I called the OB and they told me it should be fine but I was welcome to come in for a scan if it would calm my mind.
My favorite nurse just called back. Thank goodness She reassured me and said it was fine, just don't do it often- which trust me, I WON'T! lol second pregnancies are so different from the first one! I wouldn't even let our dog TOUCH my belly, and it's not that I'm not trying to be careful this time, I just didn't think about it that much until after!
@Kipperoo I am doing the same thing for the name! I'm hoping if we just ignore the conversation he will come to my side he just kept shooting down all the other ideas anyway. And we have an app that is basically baby name tinder where we can add names we like to a list that each other can see and he added my #1 name so that's progress right??
I also feel pretty disconnected from this pregnancy. Like I know there's a baby there (most of the time lol)and I'm excited but just can't really get connected or get in gear to do anything. We announced super early with our first to family and face book (8ish weeks) and this time we didn't tell family until 15 weeks and nothing in Facebook yet. I don't even really want to announce but DH does. Second baby syndrome?
@RainyDays86 I totally feel you on the Christmas card announcement. As soon as I dropped them in the mailbox, I wanted to bring them all back. I'm sure everything will be fine (for both of us), but the worry feels so real!
@NotAPlaya-JustCrushAlot look up "baby name" in the App Store. It's a yellow background with a white egg. When you set it up you send an invitation to your partner for them to install it and then it links your accounts. Then it gives you name, swipe right if you like it, left if you don't. All the ones you like go on a list that only you can see (same thing for the list your partner likes) and then any name that you both said you liked go on a "match" list that you both can see. Some of the names are way out there though, so just a warning. You can buy upgrades that allow you to filter what kind of names they show you.
I decided not to announce on facebook because I'm having more fun telling people as I see them in person. We're seeing friends from across the country over Christmas and it'll be fun to just show up with an 18 week bump.
Re: sex drive. Mine has been coming back, but DH's has been low this whole pregnancy because he has unfounded worries about whether it's safe (I know it is...). After all the sex we had when we were trying to get pregnant, this feels really weird. He's taking me out for my birthday tonight, so I'm expecting some!
Me: 29, DH: 31 Married: October 2014 Began TTC: April 2015 BFP #1: 9/18/15. EDD 5/18/16. MC 10/26/15. (9w) BFP #2: 2/27/16. EDD 11/7/16. MC/D&E 4/20/16 (11w) BFP #3: 9/22/16. EDD 5/29/17. DS born 4/24/17 BFP #4: 5/20/18. EDD 1/23/19.
Do we have a post about what we want for Christmas (not baby related)? I tried searching but couldn't find anything. All the family keeps asking for ideas so I need some inspiration.
Re: Randoms and Questions 12.5 - 12.11
May17 Siggy Challenge
Labor
After the camping season, he's on his own schedule. Year-round employee, but he works from home and he'll be able to provide childcare. The spring and fall can be busy with groups, too, but it's nothing like the summer!
Married: October 2014
Began TTC: April 2015
BFP #1: 9/18/15. EDD 5/18/16. MC 10/26/15. (9w)
BFP #2: 2/27/16. EDD 11/7/16. MC/D&E 4/20/16 (11w)
BFP #3: 9/22/16. EDD 5/29/17. DS born 4/24/17
BFP #4: 5/20/18. EDD 1/23/19.
So when this came as a surprise I was just miserable for the first 8 or so weeks. I feel guilty for feeling that way, but I'm past that and to the excitement. Especially finding out the sex and feeling him move.
Sweet Baby H 12.21.11
Sassy Baby P 03.26.14
Little Brother Due 05.22.17
Thanks everyone for the reassurance that I'm not a (totally) terrible wife! Maybe some "alone time" might be helpful for getting myself back in the groove.
As far as paternity leave, MH "thinks" he has 4 weeks but never seems too sure of his benefits - much to my Type A dismay... If he can, I'd like for him to take maybe two weeks for the birth and then 2 weeks when I go back to work so I have a LITTLE less to worry about. We'll see how it shakes out.
@mamatowildones oh that's so terribly sad. An okay friend of mine who had a baby under a year old had passed away in her sleep unexpectly. It turned out she had a brain aneurysm. This was about 8 or so years ago. Positive thoughts to all those affected.
Sweet Baby H 12.21.11
Sassy Baby P 03.26.14
Little Brother Due 05.22.17
May '17 labor memes
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Sweet Baby H 12.21.11
Sassy Baby P 03.26.14
Little Brother Due 05.22.17
Not mean at all! I don't have to stay but traffic is pretty bad to and from so it would be half the time driving to spend an hour at home. I do run to Target when I have some stuff to pick up but Target twice a week wouldn't make my husband happy! Lol
I'm definitely looking into those seat cushions!
Also it's a metal building so wifi/cell service is awful so I can't even spend my two hours to catch up on The Bump!
Sweet Baby H 12.21.11
Sassy Baby P 03.26.14
Little Brother Due 05.22.17
I'm so glad it's not just me that feels this way though. @BeachMommy2B that's exactly where I'm at, just haven't found out the sex and I hope that it will help.
Sweet Baby H 12.21.11
Sassy Baby P 03.26.14
Little Brother Due 05.22.17
Sounds like I'm in the minority, but H and I just had some hot & heavy time in between the sheets!
DS1 7/24/15
DS2 5/7/17
DH went to 80% of the appointments with DD but so far hasn't been able to go to any this time. He's supposed to be at the anatomy scan in a couple weeks but that will probably be the only one this time.
Last time DH took 2 week after baby was born but had to use his vacation days. This time I think he will only take a week because we are going on a missions trip for a month roughly 6 weeks after baby is born, so he needs to save vacation days.
DD is RFing in the middle right now. After baby we will probably move her behind one of us and put the new baby behind the other seat. I don't quite trust her to keep her hands/toys/etc to herself.
Sex drive is slowly coming back finally! This week was the first time in a loooong time that I initiated and didn't feel like i was going through the motions as a "duty".
Yay for all all the posts today!!
1/7/2015 Twins born @ 34 weeks
My sex drive is nill. DH has been pretty cool about it but he's getting frustrated now I think. I may have to suck it up this week.
DH went to more appointments with my first pregnancy but he went to the appointment to confirm the pregnancy and he'll go to the anatomy scan. Has anyone taken a child to that one? Thinking of taking my three year old son but not sure if that's a terrible idea.
Are a lot of you doing pregnancy announcements?
As for pregnancy announcements, I just posted mine the other day.
Oh and since my husband works in the clinic next door he shows up more often than not if he isn't already with a patient. Usually it's just to say hi to my doc and then he bounces. We aren't big about hearing the heartbeat and whatnot, as long as things are normal its business as usual.
May '17 labor memes
I seem to have a higher sex drive when pregnant.
My DH only came to the anatomy scan with DD. I was induced due to pre-e and he got there later in the day after I was admitted (there was no rush and I told him to finish up stuff with work). Military gets 10 days as others have said. DH 10 days started once we went home from the hospital. I was in the hospital 5 days.
DH hasn't been to any appointments this time and we are currently separated and in different states. Even if we were together he is in a special class and can't get time off.
I am not one that's super connected with pregnancy. I'm pretty visual and I obviously know I have a baby in me, but I'm not all warm and fuzzy about it. My daughter and I bonded after birth and she is still overly attached.
You guys...I had a plan to stop suggesting names in hopes that my husband (who never suggests names, just nixes my suggestions and never seems thrilled with ANY names I suggest) would come around to my top name choice. After a week of no name talk, I said to him last night "So...what are we going to name this baby girl?" And he said "Estelle...of course that's what we're going with." WTF? My plan worked, and I'm thrilled, but we NEVER had a final name conversation. Or even something that was close to a final name conversation. I just stopped talking about it entirely. I guess that's a win for me?
And another thing...I'm TOTALLY dragging my feet about posting something pregnancy announcement related on Facebook and I have no idea why. With our first, we were so excited, especially because we have friends and family spread out all over the country that we wouldn't call individually to tell. This should be just as exciting, but for some reason, it seems a lot more...personal? Maybe I'll feel different after the anatomy scan next week...
Married:09/14/13
Baby 2 - Due: 5/4/17
With our first, DH came to pretty much every appointment. With this one, he's just coming to the anatomy scan. Second child syndrome, I guess.
Getting on the Bump has made me realize how disconnected from this pregnancy I actually am. I haven't even thought about the nursery or the registry and haven't posted anything on Facebook. My family is really excited (we found out this one will be a girl) and they seem to talk about it a lot more than I do. I think it's just because I'm busy with DS and I have a hard time picturing how an actual baby is going to fit into our life. I think it will become more real when she starts moving around more.
Random question- I don't want to call my Dr because I am always worried about something, but- My daughter likes to play "ride a horsey" and bounce on my husband and I. I was laying on her floor this morning on my side and she came over and started playing, I let her play because I sat her high up on my rib cage on my side. Now I'm worried I shouldn't have let her bounce on me but I thought she was high enough at the time and figured my ribs would get most of it. Do you think its okay?! I'm having twins and have a short torso.
1st Baby 5/12/17, Henry
1/7/2015 Twins born @ 34 weeks
I also feel pretty disconnected from this pregnancy. Like I know there's a baby there (most of the time lol)and I'm excited but just can't really get connected or get in gear to do anything. We announced super early with our first to family and face book (8ish weeks) and this time we didn't tell family until 15 weeks and nothing in Facebook yet. I don't even really want to announce but DH does. Second baby syndrome?
May17 Siggy Challenge
Labor
Re: sex drive. Mine has been coming back, but DH's has been low this whole pregnancy because he has unfounded worries about whether it's safe (I know it is...). After all the sex we had when we were trying to get pregnant, this feels really weird. He's taking me out for my birthday tonight, so I'm expecting some!
Married: October 2014
Began TTC: April 2015
BFP #1: 9/18/15. EDD 5/18/16. MC 10/26/15. (9w)
BFP #2: 2/27/16. EDD 11/7/16. MC/D&E 4/20/16 (11w)
BFP #3: 9/22/16. EDD 5/29/17. DS born 4/24/17
BFP #4: 5/20/18. EDD 1/23/19.