**June TWW**

Wishilivedinflorida

Welcome to the June TWW! Craziness and irrational thinking is welcome and safe in here...hoping June is everyone's month! 

I feel like a gif would be appropriate here but I can never get it to work on mobile, so...

SnobunnieMel

Woooohooo! Starting off June on DPO 1 so that makes counting easy.

So excited to be here. This month has been the most optomistic since starting TTC. We will see if that kicks me in the ass in 2 weeks. Atleast I know we did everything and then some to ensure the very best chances this month. 

And lets all all get some awesome Father's Day BFPs ladies!!!

BornReady

So, what sort of 2WW voodoo are you ladies working this month? So far I"m doing pineapple core and sunflower seeds. I did both the cycle I conceived #1 and so I've dedicated this cycle to recreating what I did then.

Wishilivedinflorida

2dpo here. I plan on spending my TWW convincing myself I'm not KU. That method seemed to work with BFP #1, which was conceived on what I'm almost certain was -3, +1 timing. We hit -4, -3 and O this time, but DH is sick, so who knows. O BD was sad and uncomfortable and out of desperation. 

I wish I liked pineapple more. 

fivetimesnoluck

@BornReady Tell me about the sunflower seeds... I haven't heard of that one! I learn/hear about something new each month, I swear....

I am pretty sure O is on the money today. I felt lots of ovulation discomfort over the past couple of days. My US on Monday showed a mature follicle on my right side and I think she looked like a winner! We have had a great schedule of BD, hitting -4, -2, -1 and we'll go today for good measure. Maybe tomorrow too - just cause it's fun and it's my birthday week.

As per usual, I am just going to do my best to keep my head on straight. I have acupuncture today. I went to yoga yesterday. I think I am going to try some of the fertility based meditations (have been inconsistent, need to make it a priority more often). I am going to buy a pineapple tonight. Haven't done that one yet... Have a carton of sunflower seed under my desk, may go dive into those now too.

I have been putting in a little less time over here, trying to see if that helps me stay balanced, so I apologize if I am inconsistent with my engagement. Still rooting for us all!!

SnobunnieMel

I make sure I stopped at 11 pm last night coming home from work for a pineapple. I also have acupuncture at dpo5 to help with blood flow and implantation. He does micro current with needles on my belly. It's weird but if it works I don't care. I am also continuing my mediation and I guess "positive visualization" of seeing a healthy egg traveling along in my mind and sticking down. 

We have had relations 8 times in the last 7 days so I know his swimmers are there. All up to me now 

BornReady

@fivetimesnoluck I've heard it's for implantation, but who knows! The unsalted sunflower kernels are one of my favorite snacks most of the time anyways, so I plan to just plan to eat them more mindfully during this TWW.

MissPrint1219

I need some tww voodoo! I'm in limbo - CD 29, 12ish dpo if my opk is to be believed. Took a FRER last night after work and thought I saw a very, very faint second line. Did a wondfo this morning with fmu and nothing, but did have a small amount of bright red spotting when I wiped (sorry if tmi) and I NEVER spot before af. Since then, nothing. No spotting, no af, no real cramping but I feel "off". Started progesterone supplements last night just in case, but other than that, I'm feeling stuck. We've been at this so long that I know better than to read into anything, and so I'm just waiting for my body to throw me a clear sign either way. UGGGGGH!!!!

brooklyngirl18

making a mental note to pick up pineapple and sunflower seeds on my way home from work. I'm sitting here at 4DPO I think, my temps have been very rocky so I'm not sure if FF is correct or not. I will be starting to test super early because I will need bloodwork done early due to my previous ectopic. 

i woke up with a UTI this morning and started antiobiotics. I'm hoping this doesn't mess with anything. 

SnobunnieMel

For those who are doing pineapple, all my research says slice it into 5 pieces including the core and eat one a day from dpo0-5. The core is the most important part for the bromelin. If you are past that I don't know. It does say avoid once comfirmed BFP so careful eating to too late.

mylittleversailles

Pineapple core is actually my favourite part of a really ripe fruit. One time, I had my friend prepare a fruit tray for a lunch we were serving for my mother-in-law. He proudly served the pineapple core on top because he'd always seen me happily munching on it in secret and figured it was the best part I kept as a treat for myself. 

Carry on TWWing.

roxgibbons

I'm 5 days past iui- My voodoo plan consists of pineapple core, bone broth, and warm foods, and  staying away from cold foods and drinks as much as possible but with 90 degree weather it's been challenging. I have an acupuncture appt today too to help with implantation. I'll throw some sunflower seeds in the mix too. I've been trying hard not to over analyze every cramp and twinge but man it's tough. I'm all in and hope this our month. I'm waiting till 14 days past iui to test. GL everyone!!
 

lilyaster

I'm 6DPO and our timing was good this month...but DH and I spend several drunken hours in a hot tub back in April, so I don't know if his boys have recovered from that yet.  I only have 4 hpt's left and I'm going to try to hold off testing as long as I can.  Which won't be very long!  I'm not trying anything special this month to help with implantation, just trying not to dwell on it too much.

dubcompanion

5-6 DPO here...assuming I didn't O earlier or later... Man, I picked a bad month to both not do OPKs/begin temping and to become more active on this board. I feel like the past two weeks have been me going, "Soooo, not really sure what's goin' down in D-town? Hai guys."  I swear, I'm usually more certain...

The voodoo I am doing this TWW are sunflower seeds (easy one; they are my go-to snack food forever and always) and not assuming all "twinges", aches, and other typical KU symptoms I had in the past means that I am. I thought I did great today until I remembered that on the car ride home, I swore my lower abdomen felt hard, like it did when I was 11 weeks along. And then I started-

Oh god, never mind. Let the BSC begin.  

Wishilivedinflorida

@dubcompanion I hear you on comparing symptoms. Both prior pregnancies I felt an unmistakable pressure in the lower pelvis starting around 12 dpo. In fact, the first time I thought I had a UTI, and it turns out it was likely implantation-related discomfort. The second time I knew what it was right away and drove to the store at 530 am for a digi to confirm. 

Now my post-loss brain wonders if those feelings were a bad sign in some way. The next time I'm pregnant, I want it to feel completely different just to appease me. Make no mistake, I have 12dpo clearly marked down for symptom spotting, though. Ugh. 

brooklyngirl18

luckily (or unluckily) I woke up with a uti yesterday which is totally throwing off everything down there so I'm not over analyzing every little feeling but I also worry it'll affect implantation. ughhhh so annoying! and I'm pretty sure FF is wrong about my O day. I had ewcm for 2 days following the red line indicting O so I think I'm 2DPO instead of 5 days DPO which is a total bummer. this is going to be a long 8 days. I plan to start testing at 10 DPO since I will need early bloodwork which is probably just a waste of time since I didn't get a positive until my period was late both times. 

MissPrint1219

@Wishilivedinflorida - I totally understand those thoughts. Every time I start symptom spotting, I always find myself comparing to previous pregnancies, and then I get frustrated because every one was different but I can't remember now which one I felt this way and which one I felt that. It's almost panic inducing. I also remember not getting positives until well after af was late at least twice (I've never tested positive before a missed period), so my brain says maybe, but then with both super early losses the lines were faint to start and never got dark, so I start wondering if that's what's happening. My loss experience has become one big blurred memory and I keep praying for a completely different experience, too, so I can stop anticipating what will happen next.

dubcompanion

@Wishilivedinflorida - I know what you mean about wanting different symptoms next time around. Even though I know it had nothing to do with the loss, I never once felt nauseated for the 12 weeks I was pregnant. When it happens again, I feel like morning sickness would let me know things will be different. Not rational, I know. But just maybe.

@brooklyngirl18 Sorry to hear about the UTI. That's no fun. I'm prone to yeast infections and whenever I have them, I worry that both the infection and treatment will affect conception.  

My boobs are a bit sore and I feel very mild cramping sitting in the van on the way to Kansas. I'm also rather moody today, although I hardly got any sleep last night. I'm attributing the symptoms to early PMS and I'm already feeling down that I'm out this month. See, my irrationality works both ways: so sure I'm KU'ed, and then so sure I'm not... It's only, at the most, 7 DPO.

I'm going to start a more structured charting method next month. The "break" from active fertility tracking was kinda nice, but I'm thinking I don't have the personality for it. I need to know things  

MooFish2364

@Wishilivedinflorida I feel the exact same way. When I was right at 4 weeks, I had a lot of pressure and cramping along with bad lower back pain. It was similar to my period but slightly different. Everything I read said that it was normal and my midwife didn't seem too concerned when I went in for my first appointment. I got more and more symptoms and my tests did get a bit darker. I didn't know anything was wrong until I was 7 weeks and my body still wouldn't give up at 10 weeks when I had my d&c. Now I'm worried that I will have the same cramping if I get another bfp and that scares the crap out of me. 

MooFish2364

I've been slightly nauseous on and off since Monday. I know that it's not because I'm KU because it would be way too early even if I was. I'm pretty sure it's just sinus drainage. DH keeps asking me if I'm KU and it's driving me crazy! I keep telling him to knock it off and that if I am KU he will be the first to know. Does he think I have some kind of magic crystal ball or something?! I've explained the process to him to no avail. Lol

dubcompanion

@MooFish2364 Sounds like he's just as eager as the rest of us!  

Wishilivedinflorida

@brooklyngirl18 Sorry about the UTI. I'm prone to them myself, and they've been more frequent with the ambitious BD schedule since TTC, despite the post-sex pee. Fx you feel better soon. 

@MooFish2364 Sounds like DH has caught a little of the BSC! This is precisely why I don't tell DH any of my symptoms. 

@dubcompanion I wished for morning sickness this last pregnancy for the same reason and it never arrived. Both times I never really had it. I maybe got slightly queasy over thanksgiving with my first pregnancy, but it didn't impact my eating or anything. I would give anything for a miserable first tri after having two losses where I barely felt pregnant. What an awful thing to wish for...loss is so cruel like that. Keep your chin up, you're only 7dpo, so you're definitely not out yet!!

@missprint1219 I agree that multiple losses tend to blur together. I'm already mad at myself that I can't remember exactly how far along I was with each when we found out about the losses. I'm slowly losing the details, and it's saddening because I feel like I'm losing the few memories of my only children. 

MissPrint1219

@Wishilivedinflorida  - That's a really good way to put it, that it feels like losing the few memories you have of your children. It's scary and sad and at the same time comforting because it's a duller pain when the memories aren't as sharp.

fivetimesnoluck

Ugh, I am so irritated that a mixture of exhaustion and performance anxiety prevented us from sealing the deal on O day last night/this morning. I immediately spiraled into a frustration with my DH that I am not proud of. I kept it to myself, but have to spew it somewhere.

Lately if he ticks me off (and as irrational as it is, I am ticked about not getting it done), I tend to focus on the many sacrifices I have had to make through this ordeal and comparatively, he has made very little. I am not trying to minimize any part of what he has felt, because he has absolutely shared in the grief of our losses, has had his own struggles and has been an outstanding support - but he hasn't had monthly ultrasounds. He hasn't given pints of blood for testing. He doesn't have to keep up with myriad prescriptions, including shots and suppositories, some that have gross side effects. He hasn't quit smoking. He hasn't changed his diet or his exercise. UGH, I do NOT want to be this person.

Thanks for listening, internet. Maybe I will be able to move on more quickly just by getting it out into space and off my mind.

fivetimesnoluck

@Wishilivedinflorida @dubcompanion @MissPrint1219 @MooFish2364 I hear you all on the symptom comparisons. It is so maddening to try and figure it out. I keep telling myself I will not go overboard with SS each cycle.... and yet, there I go. I, too, have a hard time keeping my memories straight with regard to my previous pregnancies and feel very conflicted about not having a clearer picture of what each experience was like.

@brooklyngirl18 I am sorry to hear about your UTI. Such a pain, literally and figuratively.
@MooFish2364 Hope you're not getting sick!

Every day is a new roller coaster, it seems.

Who is going to be the first to test this month? I am not up until the 13th... @MissPrint1219 Did you test again today? FX for you to get a clear (+) sign!

MWoodside

@fivetimesnoluck, I hear you. On all of it. I do the same thing. Cut yourself some slack.  Sometimes the frustration is totally warranted, even if it makes you feel bad later.

@brooklyngirl18, UTIs are the worst, I am sorry.

@SnobunnieMel, the pineapple thing is so interesting! I always avoided it until the very end b/c I understood it can bring on surges.

I am on 9DPO over here. Trying to avoid testing this weekend. Hopefully I will forget during FMU time all weekend b/c we have family in town and they will be keeping me super busy 24/7. I do not have a feeling this is my month at all. I am expecting BFN. We only had one well-timed attempt this cycle.  In a way a BFN will be a mild feeling of relief b/c I had a Feb EDD with my last loss so I've waffled between thinking a Feb EDD again would be a redemptive experience or a total mind f*ck.

SnobunnieMel

@fivetimesnoluck you are not alone in that. It's completely normal to feel that way. I have started several fights with DH about a bad habit he says he stopped but I will catch him doing. I remind him I go through weekly blood draws, take 34 pills a day, endure physical pain to keep trying and he can't do my one request. Sometimes men don't realize how much this is and vocalizing it helps. Just know we are all with you in your emotions. It's ok to be "that" person some times 

Spartanrd4

**lurking from waiting to O***

@fivetimesnoluck DH on several occasions has complained that he feels like I only want him around for baby making and no other time...like he is being used. I had to further remind him of all the things that I do- take my temperature every day, check cm, pee on sticks, had blood drawn in addition to having a D&C and hormones being out of whack the past 3 months. Asking him to have sex with me when I need him to is not that out of the question. That shut him up quick. 

@MooFish2364 DH doesn't want to know anything about when I'm fertile because he'll freak out but then he keeps asking if I've ovulated yet (hows your temp today, did you have solid smiley yet). Then he keeps saying after O how much he thinks I'm pregnant and I'm like dude when I'm KU I'll let you know, STFU. 

MissPrint1219

@fivetimesnoluck - I tested again this morning with a wondfo. Nothing. I'm CD30, 14ish dpo so a definitive answer would be nice any day now....Thank you for the good juju!

brooklyngirl18

+1 to comparing all symptoms to prior pregnancies. The biggest red flag to me with my ectopic was how much lighter all my symptoms were than with my pregnancy with DS. I kept trying to push the thoughts out of my mind and tell myself I was lucky to have such mild symptoms, but deep down I knew something wasn't right. As crazy as it sounds, i'm also hoping for strong symptoms throughout to keep my mind at ease. 

@fivetimesnoluck vent away!! i understand not wanting to confront him and start a fight, hopefully venting here will get it off your chest so you can move on without making it a 'thing'. pretty sure we've all been there and can totally relate.

BornReady

@fivetimesnoluck Friend, as you can see from PP, we've all been there. I have had not some of my better moments myself in similar situations. One particularly bad moment I reminded my DH what "time" it was and he said, "nope, maybe in the morning". I took it as a huge power struggle move and wanted to scream in his face. Overall, he is game for the "plan", but that's not to say TTC is without it's moments of frustration and relationship testing.

Wishilivedinflorida

@fivetimesnoluck +one million to the frustrations with DH from time to time. It's hard to remember that they are somewhat removed from the process when their physical "involvement" lasts minutes, compared to weeks/months of things we go through. I'm glad we have this place here to vent to one another. Big hugs, lady.

I had a thought pop up now that I'm in the TWW...

For those of you that have been here longer than me, what is etiquette here about posting BFP's? I highly doubt this is my month, but I'm rooting so much for all of you. With my last BFP I did not announce here because I wasn't here that long and didn't want to upset anyone. That being said, I want you ladies to know that I personally want to hear about everyone's BFP's. I don't think anyone announcing here would be triggering for me personally, but rather give me hope. Plus, I feel more invested in you ladies than most anyone IRL when it comes to TTC. What does everyone think about this?

Edit: Fixed a sentence.

mylittleversailles

@Wishilivedinflorida We have generally been posting them in the TWW threads. I'm happy to see people graduate, as well. I'd be sad if I didn't see when people I care about got their BFPs.

dubcompanion

@Wishilivedinflorida @reneeannemm I'd say I'm perfectly fine with seeing BFPs in the TWW thread. It would give me hope as well and would also be really neat to see their "path" as they posted throughout their wait!

rainbowturtles

Lurking but ugh @fivetimesnoluck I feel ya and don't feel bad! I get so annoyed when DH doesn't "finish up" and in my head I can't help but think "HOW WILL WE EVER MAKE A BABY AT THIS RATE??!!!" Lmao and then I picture myself potentially losing it on him in a moment of weakness one day. But hopefully venting here about it will help us both. I really don't think I'll be telling him when I'm O'ing when we start TTC; I imagine that will just make it worse!

MissPrint1219

@Wishilivedinflorida - PP are correct, etiquette on the main board was always to quietly move to PGAL or a BMB, but in here, I want to live vicariously through all of you until my next time comes :-)

I can also relate to DH not always being as...compliant...as i need him to be, so I just started tricking him. This month i ordered some, flavored party favors we'll call them, and left them out on the coffee table when I needed him to cooperate. Surprisingly, no pushback! ;-)

catiecatp

I thought I'd give some insight into the sunflower seeds - my naturopath had me take ground flax seed in the first 2 weeks of my cycle and sunflower seeds in the second half while I was on BC and it dramatically reduced my PMS. The idea is that flax supports estrogen and sunflower seeds support progesterone. In terms of amounts, 1-2 Tbsp of each per day was what I was recommended...

In the TWW too 8DPO - told another friend and a former supervisor (now mentor) about the MC - both sympathetic and nice - but we moved quickly onward because I needed advice about the job offer stuff... we still need details about the offer, but we are seriously considering it. I'm partly thinking it is stupid to move and change so much when our relationship is strained, but I think that it is the best choice for us right now... Fingers crossed for a Feb baby - the due date would be the same birthdate as my childhood (and current) BFF and she is an amazing person. Plus I think it would give DH a kick in the arse to figure out relationship stuff. I'm tired of life exploding after I "O" each month - I think we're at 2-3 months in a row.

fivetimesnoluck

Y'all know how to make a girl feel good. Thank you. Knew I wasn't alone, but definitely comforted by all of you and the fact that this frustration isn't unique. ❤️

fivetimesnoluck

And, @rainbowturtles - YES! Same thought this morning. In caps and everything!  - "HOW WILL WE EVER MAKE A BABY AT THIS RATE??!!!"

rainbowturtles

Ladies! This just freaked me out because you're all eating sunflower seeds and my mom just sent me a link about listeria and Spitz sunflower seeds! What is happening with listeria lately??!!! It's showing up everywhere 
https://glbn.ca/4Z6lO8

iceandsnowflakes29

Lurking from WTO

I'm adding sunflower seeds to my grocery list!

So, this should look interesting at the check out: sunflower seeds, ovulation  sticks, a butt load of HPTs, pre-seed ( I'm all out) and tampons. Cause that's on my shit -i-need-to-buy list