My glorious little BIL somehow talked his MIL out of the maternity shoot -- kind of. So at the last minute, she canceled with the photographer and bought the car seat.
But ... the trade off is now she wants us to come visit her in her city/state and have a family photo session with all of us where she makes all the decisions. But whatever -- I'll go pose in her cheesy pics if they're for her and that's clear.
Otherwise, our shower was AWESOME. The food was great, friends were great, etc.
I only had a few gifts to return to BRU -- a fancy baby food processor that we didn't need (we already have every kitchen gadget that does the same thing) and a diaper bag accessory kit. SO I returned those two things and got a crib mattress, a first aid kit, sheets, washcloths, sun screens for the car, a car mirror, and a "baby on board" sign that H wanted. SCORE!
By the time I got home, we had two things left that we needed: a stroller and a Pack-N-Play. I remembered these old JCPenney gift cards left over from forever ago, dug them out, and WIN! There was enough money on them to order a jogging stroller! And a threw in some clothes for H, since he's been so awesome.
So at this point, we have spent somewhere around $30 on the kid of our own money and will only need to spend $100 to buy the PNP. I considered a used one, but they're only $20-30 cheaper and we have to wonder if someone else's kiddo peed in the corner. Plus, I have a 20% of discount for BRU, so I can get it for $80, shipped to our house. So this budget baby is coming along well! Plus our parents just let us know they'd give us money toward the birth cost as our gift, which is awesome. Our insurance covers it pretty well anyhow.
THEN - then - THEEEEN -- the best thing ever happened. Last night, my much adored and cherished little BIL told us that he and his girlfriend are getting married. GUYS, I'M SO EXCITED. I adore this guy -- he's 24 now, but he was 13 when I began dating his brother in college. Thus, I've watched him grow up and he means so much to me. And my new sister-in-law is amazing and awesome. I wish they'd just move here and live with us and we could raise the baby Full House style.
Thumbs down part: my MIL managed to be the worst about the news when they were told at brunch today. Once she and my FIL were back in the car with us, she kept ranting about how she "knew this shit was coming" and how he isn't "ready." WTF, YOU'RE THE WORST. She's a pretty well established narcissist, and controlling her youngest son is part of that. She just cried like a crazy woman in the backseat. Even though this should be seen as awesome news: her son has found a woman he loves and adores, who is responsible, who has an amazing career, who makes him incredibly happy, and who motivates him to work harder. Zero sads about it.
Thumbs up: we now get to find a ridiculous, over-the-top dress to stick this baby in for the wedding. It's going to be as lavish as I can find. You only get to be a poofed out baby in your uncle's wedding once.
@wtfisup I've been waiting for your shower update since yesterday evening! So glad to hear things went well, with the exception of a few hiccups. I'm also very impressed with the amount of money that y'all have saved/not spent! Kudos to you and H!
edit: spacing
Thanks! We budgeted pretty frugally knowing we have bigger goals coming up in later years. It meant taking a used dresser and crib we didn't love, but they don't really matter long-term and work just fine. (And I initially planned to refinish the dresser; realize recently I don't care enough to do that.) But the payoff is that H is going to now be able to take a full three months off with me this summer while I'm on maternity leave. This is our one and only kiddo and he starts a new job in the fall, so I'm pretty excited to spend twelve weeks with him and the new baby. We'll be able to take a week at a time to visit friends and family in other states whenever we like. I knew I'd need his support, and I'm glad we've been able to make it work.
I'm having a bit of a panic attack today. Like holy-shit-we-will-have-a-baby-soon. Forever. And how will I change a baby in the middle of the night and feed it and do all the things. And then we will have a little boy. What do you do all day with a little boy?
I know people have always had children and we will figure it out, but today it feels incredibly overwhelming.
I'm having a bit of a panic attack today. Like holy-shit-we-will-have-a-baby-soon. Forever. And how will I change a baby in the middle of the night and feed it and do all the things. And then we will have a little boy. What do you do all day with a little boy?
I know people have always had children and we will figure it out, but today it feels incredibly overwhelming.
Totally normal. Just get yourself through the day. There will be days that feel excited and days that feel petrified.
DH has been off with me since I had Henry. And I've struggled with being alone. He tried to go meet his friend for a drink the other day and I ugly cried for 2 hrs at the thought of being by myself. He didn't go cuz he felt bad. Anyways he goes back to work tomorrow and I'm scared I'm gonna have a major breakdown! Any STMs have any suggestions or been through this sort of thing?? Is this my hormones going crazy?
Sorry I didn't know what thread to post this on and I did ask on the preemie board about it but haven't gotten any responses yet.
DH has been off with me since I had Henry. And I've struggled with being alone. He tried to go meet his friend for a drink the other day and I ugly cried for 2 hrs at the thought of being by myself. He didn't go cuz he felt bad. Anyways he goes back to work tomorrow and I'm scared I'm gonna have a major breakdown! Any STMs have any suggestions or been through this sort of thing?? Is this my hormones going crazy?
Sorry I didn't know what thread to post this on and I did ask on the preemie board about it but haven't gotten any responses yet.
It just sounds like you had a major, emotional life event and are looking for support from your partner. I think it's totally normal to have all the feelings you are having. While I don't think he needed to go have a drink with a friend, he does need to work to support you and Henry. Set yourself up to win: realize he has to work but also talk to him about your feelings. I have times when I feel similar and I am with an incredibly independent man. It really helps if I ask him to check in periodically - discuss what is reasonable with his schedule. That way you feel supported. Also, know that you are not alone, even when physically alone. You have a partner, Henry, family, friends and June 2014 backing you up! Sorry for the long response!
@hubbs173 , also consider some counseling. You can work through these emotions on your own, or you can make it much easier, more productive and often faster by letting a professional guide you. It doesn't need to be a MAJOR LIFE PROBLEM to seek counseling. It's just a form of self-care that will help you be in a better place.
Thanks ladies! I already gave him a heads up that it might be hard for me tomorrow morning and I know he'll feel bad leaving. I don't think I could've made it through this first week without him so tomorrow is going to be a big change for me. There is a NICU social worker that's available if I need it, but I'm just gonna take it one day at a time and see how I feel. My parents will be around a lot so that should help. And of course I'm so glad I've got my June 14 ladies for support!!!
My MIL sent me an e-mail saying she was going to add a name to our list. The name Gaius, pronounced "gay us" :-&
Also LOL that she thinks she can add a name to our list hahahaha
I also thought it was pronounced Guy-us and it totally makes me think of Battlestar Gallactica (anyone? just me? cool.). Also- HAHAHAHAHAHAHA- to your MIL for thinking she has a say... no seriously, HAHAHAHAHAHA!
My MIL sent me an e-mail saying she was going to add a name to our list. The name Gaius, pronounced "gay us" :-&
Also LOL that she thinks she can add a name to our list hahahaha
I also thought it was pronounced Guy-us and it totally makes me think of Battlestar Gallactica (anyone? just me? cool.). Also- HAHAHAHAHAHAHA- to your MIL for thinking she has a say... no seriously, HAHAHAHAHAHA!
@jwarnerb - YES! GAIUS BALTAR. That was honestly my first thought... and then Gaius Julius Caesar
Some days this baby moves ALL DAY. Like, she seems to have not rested for at least 10 hours. Big, strong moves. It worries me -- the stamina. I imagine infancy without napping for that long. She will conquer me.
I feel completely stoned and exhausted today. Dear. God.
I have a few vacation days saved up at work that won't be applied to my maternity leave. I was planning to take some time off the first week of May -- maybe make a 4-day weekend in which we could relax and just enjoy each other before the baby. But I'm so exhausted now; we have so much company this month; I'm just like, TAKE OFF NOWWWWWW. But logically, I know it will probably be worse/more needed in May.
I'm in denial. My due date got moved to May 30th so I keep thinking that tomorrow I can say - I'm going to have a baby next month! (give or take - I still think I'm going to have it in June).
I'm in denial. My due date got moved to May 30th so I keep thinking that tomorrow I can say - I'm going to have a baby next month! (give or take - I still think I'm going to have it in June).
When I think about the fact that there's essentially a ONE MONTH variable of when this baby could come (2 weeks early to 2 weeks late), I want to give up.
@wtfisup - one of my boobs was always a better producer and slightly larger. Just meant that I got more out of that side when I pumped. DD didn't have a boob preference and we nursed for 13 months.
You know you're a Mom when the panties hanging on your bedroom door handle have a picture of Mini Mouse on them, are devoid of lace and are made to cover the whole butt.
Why do you have panties hanging on your bedroom door handle?
You know you're a Mom when the panties hanging on your bedroom door handle have a picture of Mini Mouse on them, are devoid of lace and are made to cover the whole butt.
Why do you have panties hanging on your bedroom door handle?
DD put them there last night, I just noticed them this morning and had to laugh. She likes hanging things up, putting things is drawers or cabinets, balancing things in weird places. I guess the door handle looked like a good place for her underwear.
Have you never woken up after a crazy night with an undergarment hanging on your bedroom door handle?
OK, I thought it was some sort of code lol. Can't say I've woken up to undergarments hanging on my door, but I'm sure there's a first for everything
JUST finished talking to the person at my work who oversees these things. Looks like I will get an automatic 5 weeks of paid leave (ie the sick leave I don't really accrue, but that they use as mat leave), and since I've used 4 of my 20 days of vacation this year, I can use some of that. So I'm tentatively looking at at least 7-8 weeks of paid leave, not account for the (likely, b/c of RCS) 8 weeks of 60% pay I'll get from my Aflac short term disability policy.
Went with my best friends yesterday to do a photo shoot, I'm no pro, for ones engagement!! They insisted that I have some maternity pics taken to and I am so excited to say that about 90% of the pics turned out great!!! We were all so excited when we got to see them on the computer last night!!!
The one piece of furniture we ordered for the nursery wasn't supposed to be available until after baby was here, but we would've made do without until then (a dresser). Got a phone call last week saying that it is in (WHAT!?!?!) and just scheduled all the furniture to be delivered on Saturday I'M SO EXCITED!!!
Re: **3/25 AW/SS/Random Thread**
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#3 DD June 2014
CP December 2015
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Rainbow & Babe #4 EDD 7.28.18
I know people have always had children and we will figure it out, but today it feels incredibly overwhelming.
Sorry I didn't know what thread to post this on and I did ask on the preemie board about it but haven't gotten any responses yet.
Sorry for the long response!
@jwarnerb - YES! GAIUS BALTAR. That was honestly my first thought... and then Gaius Julius Caesar
https://www.peoplepets.com/people/pets/article/0,,20801658,00.html
Haha! Right? That's exactly what I thought!
*BFP- Sept 2013*
*Ryder due June 1,2014*
*Love of my Life*