@kinipela7 I wouldn't waste my breath. If she was worried about your feelings or potential problems it would cause, she would find a way to be there. Recitals happen all the time, baby showers do not. So, if your husband is hurt he should mention it to his mother but otherwise celebrate with the people who DO want to be there. NO sense wasting time on those who don't. If the favoritism continues after baby gets here, you're off the hook from trying to make time or prioritize someone who only sees you as an option. It might hurt now but will probably feel liberating eventually.
Not that it changes anything, but DH's mother passed away awhile ago so it's his step-mother. He was really upset but he doesn't like confrontation so he will never say anything that bothers him. I agree with you ladies though - even though I'd love to chew her out, it's not worth it one bit and I will never have to prioritize her ever again. Thanks!
Go to Disneyland! I've still been taking DD once a month and the walking hasn't been too bad. The weather is supposed to be cool-ish too so at least you won't be hot!
Along the lines of the clueless people at hospital tours:
On our first day of Childbirth Preparation class the instructor went around the room and asked all the labor partners how long they thought the whole thing lasted. One young gentleman said "2 hours". We all had a good laugh at that one.
And sure, 2 hours is certainly possible, but it is also NOT the average.
WWYD: DF went shooting yesterday in the rain. Now he is sick, but it sounds more like a virus. Would you sleep in the same room or guest room to avoid getting sick?
If it were a virus you're probably already exposed. It's unlikely he got sick from the rain, unless he inhaled the water as it fell from the sky and gave himself pneumonia. Good luck with the sickie husband tho!
June '14 September Siggy challenge- Favorite things about fall
So, I really want to start a thread to find out what other ladies are considering placenta encapsulation, get links to their articles, etc. But I just don't want to deal with all the inevitable "wwww gross" comments. But I'm not sure where to go.
A few years ago, I definitely would have fallen into the "that's weird" camp, but I don't think I would have cared if anyone else did it. Then I went through some hardcore crippling depression and anxiety relapses. I worked really hard to get better in order to be able to go off my meds and conceive and carry a child. Since before I got pregnant, all of my care providers have been throwing up red flags about my high risk for PPD. It would be quite devastating, since the treatment for it would most likely mean I couldn't breastfeed. Plus all of the hardships of bonding and nurturing while dealing with it.
Fast forward to my prenatal appointments and my midwife asked if I'd consider placenta encapsulation. Looking at my history, she recommended it. She acknowledged that there's no empirical research on it, but said that many of her patients had benefitted from it. She then said it wouldn't stave off full out PPD, but it might help with a bad bout of baby blues. I instantly didn't care if it was gross or weird. I've been through hardcore depression before: I'd ingest much weirder and grosser if it meant that it would help.
I don't know. This topic is frustrating for me. My husband is kind of terrified of me coming down with PPD, as am I. But nothing has sold me on this method. But then I'm kind of willing to try anything. And I feel like most internet resources are super biased -- i.e. the crunchy sources that are extreme and drunk on the placenta Kool-Aid, or the skeptics who have the sole interest of being skeptical. Well, plus the people who don't want to learn about it but just want to be judgmental. Blargh. Blaugh. Flaghoijdfkl.
@wtfisup, I tend towards the "ew gross" camp on that one, however, I also know that I use a lot of non-conventional medicine/treatment that works for me, so while I find it weird, I'm also not willing to just shrug off whether or not it might work for someone else. The way I see it is, if you think it might help, do it. Worst case, it does nothing to help and you're out whatever you spent on getting it done. Best case, it's a huge help and you're very thankful you did it. It's not the sort of thing you can change your mind on later if you decide not to do it. Better safe than sorry?
The fact that you and your husband are both so aware of the potential for PPD is already an awesome start to being able to see it before it's a big problem and get started with treatment, be that therapy, placenta pills, or conventional anti-depressants. We were worried about it with C, as i have a history of situational depression. While there were times that I didn't feel great, I certainly didn't have PPD, just minor cases of the baby blues here and there. While I am a proponent of don't worry until you have something to worry about, in this case, getting the encapsulation done may just give you enough peace of mind to calm some of your worries.
There, you just got an "ew gross" to tell you that you should have pills made from your placenta!
So, I really want to start a thread to find out what other ladies are considering placenta encapsulation, get links to their articles, etc. But I just don't want to deal with all the inevitable "wwww gross" comments. But I'm not sure where to go.
A few years ago, I definitely would have fallen into the "that's weird" camp, but I don't think I would have cared if anyone else did it. Then I went through some hardcore crippling depression and anxiety relapses. I worked really hard to get better in order to be able to go off my meds and conceive and carry a child. Since before I got pregnant, all of my care providers have been throwing up red flags about my high risk for PPD. It would be quite devastating, since the treatment for it would most likely mean I couldn't breastfeed. Plus all of the hardships of bonding and nurturing while dealing with it.
Fast forward to my prenatal appointments and my midwife asked if I'd consider placenta encapsulation. Looking at my history, she recommended it. She acknowledged that there's no empirical research on it, but said that many of her patients had benefitted from it. She then said it wouldn't stave off full out PPD, but it might help with a bad bout of baby blues. I instantly didn't care if it was gross or weird. I've been through hardcore depression before: I'd ingest much weirder and grosser if it meant that it would help.
I don't know. This topic is frustrating for me. My husband is kind of terrified of me coming down with PPD, as am I. But nothing has sold me on this method. But then I'm kind of willing to try anything. And I feel like most internet resources are super biased -- i.e. the crunchy sources that are extreme and drunk on the placenta Kool-Aid, or the skeptics who have the sole interest of being skeptical. Well, plus the people who don't want to learn about it but just want to be judgmental. Blargh. Blaugh. Flaghoijdfkl.
I've looked into it as I am high risk for PPD also. After my research, my conclusion is there's no scientific evidence either way. So people do feel better- is it placebo or real? Some people swear by it and then my midwife doesn't recommend it. You basically have to just choose.
@wtfisup, I tend towards the "ew gross" camp on that one, however, I also know that I use a lot of non-conventional medicine/treatment that works for me, so while I find it weird, I'm also not willing to just shrug off whether or not it might work for someone else. The way I see it is, if you think it might help, do it. Worst case, it does nothing to help and you're out whatever you spent on getting it done. Best case, it's a huge help and you're very thankful you did it. It's not the sort of thing you can change your mind on later if you decide not to do it. Better safe than sorry?
The fact that you and your husband are both so aware of the potential for PPD is already an awesome start to being able to see it before it's a big problem and get started with treatment, be that therapy, placenta pills, or conventional anti-depressants. We were worried about it with C, as i have a history of situational depression. While there were times that I didn't feel great, I certainly didn't have PPD, just minor cases of the baby blues here and there. While I am a proponent of don't worry until you have something to worry about, in this case, getting the encapsulation done may just give you enough peace of mind to calm some of your worries.
There, you just got an "ew gross" to tell you that you should have pills made from your placenta!
Awww, you're kind of the best.
So, I read one account (again, just anecdotal) of a woman who said they worsened her emotional situation. To me, that made sense: pregnancy hormones have been a hot mess on me. The reason the capsules are supposed to help is that they restore/preserve those hormones in your body. But if those hormones make me miserable, don't I want to purge them?
There, you just got an "ew gross" to tell you that you should have pills made from your placenta!
Awww, you're kind of the best.
So, I read one account (again, just anecdotal) of a woman who said they worsened her emotional situation. To me, that made sense: pregnancy hormones have been a hot mess on me. The reason the capsules are supposed to help is that they restore/preserve those hormones in your body. But if those hormones make me miserable, don't I want to purge them?
So, that sounds like the fact that some anti-depressants can make you feel suicidal. With any substance you put in your body, you run the risk of having an adverse reaction and need to keep an eye on yourself while you're adjusting. If you and your DH and your midwife are all on the same page and keep tabs on your emotional state, I vote they might still be worth a shot. I'm allergic to zoloft, makes me high as a fucking kite and then steals all my muscle control...but I still try other anti-depressants when I find I'm in need. If you try them and they don't work, meh. But if they do work, it will have been well worth it.
@wtfisup I say screw it -- start the thread. Pretty sure some of us will flame away at anyone who mocks or "eeeewwwwws." I know nothing about it and never thought about it, but I can't see why people can't have an adult conversation about it. Doooo eeet! Enough of us have your back to shut down the morons.
HIGH FIVE, FRIEND! But really, I still might not. I know this sounds incredibly wussy and whiny, but I just do such a shit job of handling online confrontation. I.e. It can make me really upset really quickly. I've been way less anxious for the past few days, so I just don't want to invite anything that will mess with that.
But I swear I'm a really confident person IRL. Like this:
There, you just got an "ew gross" to tell you that you should have pills made from your placenta!
Awww, you're kind of the best.
So, I read one account (again, just anecdotal) of a woman who said they worsened her emotional situation. To me, that made sense: pregnancy hormones have been a hot mess on me. The reason the capsules are supposed to help is that they restore/preserve those hormones in your body. But if those hormones make me miserable, don't I want to purge them?
So, that sounds like the fact that some anti-depressants can make you feel suicidal. With any substance you put in your body, you run the risk of having an adverse reaction and need to keep an eye on yourself while you're adjusting. If you and your DH and your midwife are all on the same page and keep tabs on your emotional state, I vote they might still be worth a shot. I'm allergic to zoloft, makes me high as a fucking kite and then steals all my muscle control...but I still try other anti-depressants when I find I'm in need. If you try them and they don't work, meh. But if they do work, it will have been well worth it.
emilyh107 How long was the time between your doctor's appointments? Could your baby have flipped? I hear there's still enough room in there for them to do that.
Oy. I kinda got nothing then. Unless you felt your baby doing a major backflip in that half hour. Maybe call your OB and say "hey, my peri said something different from you, what's the deal?"
(I'm kind of confrontational though; I realize that other people may not want to do that.)
FYI -- my baby moved into three very different positions today in less than five minutes during my appointment. My midwife commented that she was a very strong and "wild" one, but it's definitely possible.
@emilyh07 my doctor has never tried to feel for baby's positioning so I don't find it off. Did she mention a reason why it mattered?
They told me with Lincoln that he was breach and too big to move at like 36 weeks. Well, during week 37 or something like that I woke up in the middle of the night to him moving. It was the freakiest, uncomfortable thing. I could be off on my weeks but he totally proved them wrong.
@wtfisup I wanted to encapsulate mine and I am the furthest from crunchy. My hospital won't allow it. I second what someone else said about how it is better to have it and not use it or want it than want it and not have it. It's only a couple hundred bucks so I would do it.
I posted this in the appt thread but I know not everyone goes there so I am going to be repetitive. Is it weird my doctor told me baby was head down but when I went to my perinatalogist for my US she was definitely breech.
Why wouldn't my doctor know that?
I just got off the phone with my MIL (who I lurve) and she mentioned she wanted to wait a couple months before coming out to see the babies b/c I'd have a lot of help at first and she wanted to be there once all the help left and I felt overwhelmed and would need her. Heh? Ok, whatevs.
But her and my BIL (who I lurve but also want to simultaneously punch in the gut) were talking, and they're thinking of coming down 2 months post-partum during the week of my sister's wedding! Ahh, my sister is a huge bridezilla and I know she's going to be totally demanding, so I won't have time to entertain peeps.
Plus, they want to stay at our house. The first thing we did after the BFP was get rid of the guest rooms. She says the couch is fine, but that's a big n-o b/c her and BIL wear me out. My mom knows this and already offered to let them stay with her, but again, the week of the wedding? Ehhh not a good idea.
I already (nicely) talked to hubby and am letting him talk to them when the time comes. I just wanted to rant. I feel better.
@Rachel5130 yeah they know it's sis' wedding. Despite them being out of state our families are close and they are invited to the wedding anyways and want to go (kind of a kill two birds with one stone thing!). I'm going to have DH see if they'll be down for a hotel. If not, my mom has offered to let them stay with her, I just don't know if that will be crazy for her to host people while also in the midst of the wedding. Gah!
You get to lie on your belly during your massage?!?! They propped me up on a damn wedge and it wasn't as satisfying as I wanted it to be. I'm just banking my massages until after baby arrives.
June '14 September Siggy challenge- Favorite things about fall
late to the party, but @wtfisup - I would definitely do it. If you find that it is hurting not helping, you can stop taking it. From everything I've read it either does wonders, does a little to help or does nothing. I've never heard of someone who was negatively affected. Find a reputable place that will do it, and go for it!
wtfisup - do it. The most important thing you can do for your baby is take care of yourself physically and emotionally. If I were facing big questions about how I would fare postpartum (and I am definitely concerned, but maybe not to the degree you are), I would do whatever it takes!
@jshrop, yup! I was going to do the side lie massage as well, but then this place was recommended to me.
They have a special pregnancy table with a hole cut out of it for your belly and straps that will support your belly so it doesn't just hang while you're laying down. Soooooooo looking forward to this.
@wtfisup, I'll admit it's got a bit of the eww factor for me, but I didn't realize the benefits until I read @joules235 post. Sounds like it would help and like someone else said, better to have it on hand and not use it then want it and not have it.
And @emilyh107, yes!!! It's getting kinda annoying. I haven't participated yet either, but I've posted enough no makeup pics on FB so it may not be as much of a "challenge" for me.
I feel weird when people talk to me about my shower. It's this Saturday, but my friends that are throwing it have been super secretive. So when someone comes up and says, "We're going in on the gift together," I'm like, "Cool!" Smile. But I really feel like a greedy weirdo.
I think it's sweet that it's their thing. Of course I would have been happy with a girl, but I'm glad I'm getting another boy, I don't think I'd do very well in the braiding department either. We all have our strengths and just because you have a uterus doesn't mean you should be able to braid hair. Don't sweat it
My DD wants her hair braided a lot here lately and I actually have to pass her off to her daddy to let him do it. Just this morning she wanted her hair braided and daddy already went to work so she had a melt down. So I tried and she wasn't impressed. Aren't I suppose to be able to do these things? I'm having another little girl and she will have to have her hair braided by daddy, too. I can't even pull it back in a pony tail without there being lumps. Mommy FAIL.
My mom always did our french braids, but my dad always did our ponytails because he made them tight like we liked them...especially when we wanted the uber cool side ponytails, or the ones on the very top of our heads...oh the early '90's.... That's something that sticks out from my childhood, and since I got to do so much more 'girly' things with my mom, it's nice to have something like that to remember doing with my dad.
My daughter will likely have hair I don't know how to style. Mine is super straight and had few options. My husband has some of the thickest, coarsest, wavy/semi-curly hair. It's gorgeous, but this little girl is SOL. We're going to be watching YouTube tutorials together.
FYI - my husband is also a fab braider. He learned from making challah bread.
My DD wants her hair braided a lot here lately and I actually have to pass her off to her daddy to let him do it. Just this morning she wanted her hair braided and daddy already went to work so she had a melt down. So I tried and she wasn't impressed. Aren't I suppose to be able to do these things? I'm having another little girl and she will have to have her hair braided by daddy, too. I can't even pull it back in a pony tail without there being lumps. Mommy FAIL.
I cannot make a braid to save my life. My DD's ponytails are lumpy disasters. When she comes back from school, one of the teachers has always re-done her hair in a super-cute way. We can suck at doing hair together!
I have a condition that I am now calling "granola guilt".
So, I have always though of myself as a person open to new experience, I am definitely environmentally aware and enjoy swimming against the tide of what is considered "mainstream".
Now that I am pregnant I find that I want the most mainstream birth experience possible. OBGYN, in hospital, medicated, don't really care about letting the cord pulsate, etc. In esssence a medicalized birth doesn't bother me at all.
Except that it does bother me that I am not nearly as crunchy as I thought. This is weird, but going through this process has made me reevaluate my view of myself. Sorry for the rambling!
Re: **3/25 AW/SS/Random Thread**
WWYD: DF went shooting yesterday in the rain. Now he is sick, but it sounds more like a virus. Would you sleep in the same room or guest room to avoid getting sick?
The fact that you and your husband are both so aware of the potential for PPD is already an awesome start to being able to see it before it's a big problem and get started with treatment, be that therapy, placenta pills, or conventional anti-depressants. We were worried about it with C, as i have a history of situational depression. While there were times that I didn't feel great, I certainly didn't have PPD, just minor cases of the baby blues here and there. While I am a proponent of don't worry until you have something to worry about, in this case, getting the encapsulation done may just give you enough peace of mind to calm some of your worries.
There, you just got an "ew gross" to tell you that you should have pills made from your placenta!
Married DH 7/30/11
CSC arrived 5/7/12
CHC arrived 6/2/14
So, that sounds like the fact that some anti-depressants can make you feel suicidal. With any substance you put in your body, you run the risk of having an adverse reaction and need to keep an eye on yourself while you're adjusting. If you and your DH and your midwife are all on the same page and keep tabs on your emotional state, I vote they might still be worth a shot. I'm allergic to zoloft, makes me high as a fucking kite and then steals all my muscle control...but I still try other anti-depressants when I find I'm in need. If you try them and they don't work, meh. But if they do work, it will have been well worth it.
Married DH 7/30/11
CSC arrived 5/7/12
CHC arrived 6/2/14
FYI -- my baby moved into three very different positions today in less than five minutes during my appointment. My midwife commented that she was a very strong and "wild" one, but it's definitely possible.
Married DH 7/30/11
CSC arrived 5/7/12
CHC arrived 6/2/14
They told me with Lincoln that he was breach and too big to move at like 36 weeks. Well, during week 37 or something like that I woke up in the middle of the night to him moving. It was the freakiest, uncomfortable thing. I could be off on my weeks but he totally proved them wrong.
I'd guess that she is being naughty and flipped!
But her and my BIL (who I lurve but also want to simultaneously punch in the gut) were talking, and they're thinking of coming down 2 months post-partum during the week of my sister's wedding! Ahh, my sister is a huge bridezilla and I know she's going to be totally demanding, so I won't have time to entertain peeps.
Plus, they want to stay at our house. The first thing we did after the BFP was get rid of the guest rooms. She says the couch is fine, but that's a big n-o b/c her and BIL wear me out. My mom knows this and already offered to let them stay with her, but again, the week of the wedding? Ehhh not a good idea.
I already (nicely) talked to hubby and am letting him talk to them when the time comes. I just wanted to rant. I feel better.
SS: when my H packs my lunch, he packs enough food for a T-Rex. It's incredible.
@jshrop, yup! I was going to do the side lie massage as well, but then this place was recommended to me.
They have a special pregnancy table with a hole cut out of it for your belly and straps that will support your belly so it doesn't just hang while you're laying down. Soooooooo looking forward to this.
@wtfisup, I'll admit it's got a bit of the eww factor for me, but I didn't realize the benefits until I read @joules235 post. Sounds like it would help and like someone else said, better to have it on hand and not use it then want it and not have it.
And @emilyh107, yes!!! It's getting kinda annoying. I haven't participated yet either, but I've posted enough no makeup pics on FB so it may not be as much of a "challenge" for me.
Sorry for all the tags in the post.![:\](https://forums.thebump.com/resources/emoji/confused.png ":\")
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FYI - my husband is also a fab braider. He learned from making challah bread.
So, I have always though of myself as a person open to new experience, I am definitely environmentally aware and enjoy swimming against the tide of what is considered "mainstream".
Now that I am pregnant I find that I want the most mainstream birth experience possible. OBGYN, in hospital, medicated, don't really care about letting the cord pulsate, etc. In esssence a medicalized birth doesn't bother me at all.
Except that it does bother me that I am not nearly as crunchy as I thought. This is weird, but going through this process has made me reevaluate my view of myself. Sorry for the rambling!