Hello, let me introduce myself first..
For the first 30 years of my life, everything was smooth and worry-free. I was my parents’ most beloved child, found my true love in college, and happily married him after graduation.
At work, I was my boss’s most valued employee. Whenever I was in charge of a project, colleagues would inevitably say, “Oh, then I’m totally at ease.” I was constantly named “Employee of the Year,” with generous bonuses every year.
Later, I started my own business. Within just three months, I had broken into the market and started making money. By the fifth month, I was earning twice my previous salary. Growth was steady month after month. Right when the business needed more hands, I serendipitously met an amazing partner, and the company reached a whole new level.
Really, it seemed like at every step, whatever I needed, a pair of hands would always place it right in front of me, just in time.
My Two Girls: Ellie & Mia
Meet Ellie, My Firstborn
In 2020, my husband and I decided to have a child. After trying for over a year, we finally got the news in 2021 that a little one was on the way. In 2022, we welcomed our first child, Ellie. She made me a mother.
She is utterly adorable—big eyes, rosy skin, chubby little hands. Every time I look at her, I can’t help but give her a kiss. She is pure joy, and I love her more each day.
But as a first-time mom, I faced unprecedented difficulties. The postpartum tearing wouldn’t heal, and the pain was excruciating. Clogged milk ducts made my breasts hard as rocks. The severe sleep deprivation… And what was even more crushing was that, with zero parenting experience, I was clueless when faced with her unexplained wailing, night terrors, refusal to nurse, constipation, diarrhea, fevers… I desperately searched online, longing for one accurate, truly useful answer!
It was during this time that I thought, once I make it through this “dark” path, I must leave a light on for other new moms.
And Then Came Mia
Ellie had just turned one when I got pregnant again. In 2024, we welcomed our second daughter, Mia.
Completely different from Ellie, Mia is a great eater and sleeper. Although she had her fussy moments in the first two months, starting almost from month three, she became super easygoing. She feeds on schedule, gradually sleeps through the night, loves her solid foods, and adapted quickly when I had to stop breastfeeding due to mastitis.
This made me realize just how vastly different babies can be! It made me even more determined to write about my experiences.
Why I Had to Start This Blog
The Catalyst: A Life Pivoted
After Mia was born, my business also began to decline sharply. I had no choice but to close it and become a full-time mom. My work no longer involves Excel and Word, but instead revolves around changing diapers, washing bottles, making baby food, and managing household chores…
This has been a monumental challenge for me. All my past achievements seem irrelevant now. Managing two young children has brought me a sense of frustration I’ve never known before.
The Daily Reality
They are always fighting over things. When one is in my arms, the other immediately demands to be held too. When I try to cook, Ellie wants me to read her a book. When I attempt to load the washing machine, Mia has a diaper blowout, and I must drop everything to change her…
By the time I finish all that, I see the cup of hot coffee on the table has gone cold again. And it’s not until evening that I remember, “Oh my goodness, the clothes are still in the hamper, unwashed!”
Of course, being a mom is filled with happiness, but that doesn’t negate how hard it is.
My Promise to You
Because I’ve walked this path myself, I won’t just tell you how joyful motherhood is, like many websites do. I want to share my real, unfiltered experiences so every new mom can find a “companion” here.
I want to tell you: you are not alone. What you’re going through, I’ve been there too. Your breakdowns, your helplessness, your moments of losing control—I’ve had them all. You don’t need to feel guilty. This is just a small, necessary stretch of the journey for every mom.
My Hope for This Space
I really want to share my parenting experiences—not just the warm, glowing moments, but to honestly document the pitfalls I’ve stumbled into, the tears I’ve shed, and the “survival wisdom” I’ve scraped together in utter exhaustion.
The Goal: A Mom’s Toolkit
I hope this blog becomes a “mom’s toolkit,” filled not with vague theories, but with:
- Practical Tips: Like how to quickly figure out why a baby is crying, tried-and-true methods for dealing with clogged ducts, or how to efficiently manage the daily grind with twins (or two under two) solo.
- Pitfall Avoidance Guides: Sharing the baby products I regret buying the most, and those “game-changer” parenting hacks. Letting you know which parenting anxieties you can let go of, and which principles are worth holding onto.
- A Community for Moms: I hope my stories connect me with more moms like you. We can cheer each other on in the comments, share our own tricks, turning the storms we face alone into a journey we walk together.
The Bigger Vision
My previous career taught me to analyze data, solve problems, and optimize processes. Now, I’m applying all those skills to this new “position” of Mom. I want to prove that a mom’s value is absolutely not confined to the home. The mindset, resilience, and creativity we built in our careers can shine just as brightly—perhaps even brighter—in this more complex, long-term “project” of raising humans, and can even be transformed into a force that helps others.
My hope is simple: that every mom who opens this blog can let out a sigh of relief and say, “So it’s not just me.” Then, she can find a bit of practical info, a dose of comforting solidarity, and return to her sweet, chaotic mom-life with a little more confidence and a little less weight on her shoulders.
This road? Let’s walk it together.
kboydbowman
member
Re: The Great Big Queston Thread!
It didn't hinder us buying things either, because now we have a lot of cute, gender neutral stuff for the next kid. So much money is saved, and honestly, you'll have plenty of opportunities to buy specific colors and patterns once the baby is here. We painted her room a pretty, light green and white stripe that will easily transition to the next kid. Wins across the board!
@knottie29c2dde06fb4a956 It stands for second time (or more) mom. Also, you should consider changing your screen name on here so that it's easier to tag and get to know you!
We even talked about my husband finding out but not telling me or anyone else the entire time. That way, he could still buy gender specific things if it's something I really wanted. haha
Having my husband announce both was awesome. I made sure it was in my plan that we didn't know and that he was too announce. I had c-sections with both and the first one they held up while waiting for the cord to stop pulsating and my husband though the cord was a penis and got confused 😂. The second they held up and my 10 lb baby I was like I can't see anything with all those tools 😂.
I think he ends up with gender disappointment (we have 2 girls) and I prefer to allow him to have that one they're born instead of while I'm still gestating, I feel he'd be mopey until the baby was born. This way he can't be mopey because you just love the baby regardless when they're in your arms.
I also know he can't keep a secret and I don't want to share that information or deal with the "oh are you upset it's not a boy" question over and over, people don't ask that when there's a baby in your arms.
If it's your first, getting gender neutral things is so much better than getting pink everything in my opinion.
When our first was born, my husband sent a text with a blurry picture of me, and his thumb hiding the baby and just said, here's a picture everyone is doing well, I'll update you all later! And then let them all for a few hours guessing and having no idea what we had or what she looked like 😂 I thought that was a hilarious birth announcement and it gave us time just the 3 of us without the rest of the world looking in.
Source on all of this is Emily Oster, from "Expecting Better," who cites actual research studies and data.
First BFP on 1/4/22. Due date 9/13/22.
First BFP on 1/4/22. Due date 9/13/22.
First BFP on 1/4/22. Due date 9/13/22.
First BFP on 1/4/22. Due date 9/13/22.
First BFP on 1/4/22. Due date 9/13/22.
First BFP on 1/4/22. Due date 9/13/22.
First BFP on 1/4/22. Due date 9/13/22.
Call your doctor today (they should have a nurse's line) and confirm what you're taking. It's better to be safe than sorry. Too much or too little of any particular vitamin can be bad, so it's better to check with the professional who knows your history.
First BFP on 1/4/22. Due date 9/13/22.
that's my point - I literally have to take all that stuff to keep my levels in the normal range, but everyone's needs are different. My particular form of WLS tends to cause deficits in vitamins A, D, E, and K. I get all of my levels checked every 6 months or so and we adjust my regimen based on what my levels are doing.
First BFP on 1/4/22. Due date 9/13/22.
First BFP on 1/4/22. Due date 9/13/22.