The Great Big Queston Thread!

kboydbowman

Have a question? Drop it here so we can try and answer it, or point you in the right direction!

(Try to place questions here rather than in "one off" threads - keeps the board looking cleaner.)

whitta1015

This is super early but have any STM+ ever been Team Green? DH and I have been throwing around the idea. 

ladydi6

What does STM+ stand for?

trapperkeeper87

@whitta1015 I was! I plan to do it again this time. There was nothing like having my husband announce it to me after she came out. Texting family a picture and asking for their final guess was so much fun too. There is really no feeling like that one, with all the emotions flying around the room. We were the first to know (outside the doctor and care team, of course), and it was a beautiful secret to have. 

It didn't hinder us buying things either, because now we have a lot of cute, gender neutral stuff for the next kid. So much money is saved, and honestly, you'll have plenty of opportunities to buy specific colors and patterns once the baby is here. We painted her room a pretty, light green and white stripe that will easily transition to the next kid. Wins across the board!

@knottie29c2dde06fb4a956 It stands for second time (or more) mom. Also, you should consider changing your screen name on here so that it's easier to tag and get to know you!

whitta1015

@trapperkeeper87 - Thanks so much! We found out at 13 weeks with my little girl, but like you said, I can't imagine how special the moment would be when my husband got to announce it to me. I also read that it's nice because, if you have a baby shower/sprinkle, people tend to buy you more of the things you need (diapers/wipes) instead of clothes. 

We even talked about my husband finding out but not telling me or anyone else the entire time. That way, he could still buy gender specific things if it's something I really wanted. haha

jhysmath

@whitta1015 we were team Green for both of ours and plan to do that again despite my husband's wish to find out sooner. I always say when you're holding the baby you can know the sex, right now I'm holding the baby. 

Having my husband announce both was awesome. I made sure it was in my plan that we didn't know and that he was too announce. I had c-sections with both and the first one they held up while waiting for the cord to stop pulsating and my husband though the cord was a penis and got confused 😂. The second they held up and my 10 lb baby I was like I can't see anything with all those tools 😂.

I think he ends up with gender  disappointment (we have 2 girls) and I prefer to allow him to have that one they're born instead of while I'm still gestating, I feel he'd be mopey until the baby was born. This way he can't be mopey because you just love the baby regardless when they're in your arms.

I also know he can't keep a secret and I don't want to share that information or deal with the "oh are you upset it's not a boy" question over and over, people don't ask that when there's a baby in your arms. 

If it's your first, getting gender neutral things is so much better than getting pink everything in my opinion. 

When our first was born, my husband sent a text with a blurry picture of me, and his thumb hiding the baby and just said, here's a picture everyone is doing well, I'll update you all later! And then let them all for a few hours guessing and having no idea what we had or what she looked like 😂 I thought that was a hilarious birth announcement and it gave us time just the 3 of us without the rest of the world looking in. 

magnolia209

If you asked or were told: How much coffee did your doctor say was ok in the first trimester? My PCP said 1 cup. Last time, a different PCP said 2 cups. I googled and it said 1.5 cup. If you think I’m splitting hairs here, please know I have a 3 year old who is waking up at 5:15am all of the sudden! Thanks ladies! 

kboydbowman

Ok, take it for what it's worth, but the actual statistical data says there's no increase in miscarriage rates up to 2 cups a day (at 140 mg per cup of coffee, so 280-300 mg a day; I make very weak coffee, so that's 3 cups per day for me). Non-coffee sources of caffeine appear to have even less impact (of note, most "other" sources of caffeine contain less caffeine per serving than coffee); there is some evidence that the issue is more the nausea that can be linked to coffee than the caffeine itself.  There actually does not appear to be much evidence for negative impact on fetal development until you get into 6-8+ cups of coffee per day range.  Overall consensus is generally 2 cups per day (250-300 mg of caffeine) is not going to have any negative impact, and the weaker you make your coffee the more is "ok" (I drink half-caf).

Source on all of this is Emily Oster, from "Expecting Better," who cites actual research studies and data.

magnolia209

Thanks @kboydbowman I’m getting shaky from the coffee very quickly anyway. But I love coffee. I’ve barely had time to adjust to this pregnancy, but one felt too strict! I’ll ask my OB as well once that appointment gets set. But I know 1-2 is totally fine. It’s just going to take time getting down from the 3 ish cups I usually have. It’s just drip coffee - it’s not that strong. But based on how I feel, I can tell I should stick with one ish. I need to get some decafe too! I just love the act of drinking coffee and have endless zoom meetings for work! 

kboydbowman

@magnolia209 if you're not a coffee snob, Folger's has a half-caf in the red tubs that's fairly cheap.  It's like 74 mg of caffeine or less per cup, so you could keep your 3 (or even 4) cups per day and stay within the guidelines.

trapperkeeper87

kboydbowman said:

@magnolia209 if you're not a coffee snob, Folger's has a half-caf in the red tubs that's fairly cheap.  It's like 74 mg of caffeine or less per cup, so you could keep your 3 (or even 4) cups per day and stay within the guidelines.

I secretly love Folger's, but I've only been drinking coffee for about a year. 🙊 I'm gonna have to get this...

kboydbowman

@trapperkeeper87 I have a subscription with Amazon - one gets sent automatically every 2 months.   You will not taste the difference, I promise.

theblondebump

@whitta1015 YES! DH and I were team green for our first pregnancy and the moment DD was born was the most amazing surprise of my life! I cannot recommend it more! We are going to do it again this pregnancy. But it's definitely not for everyone - sometimes people just need to know, they don't like surprises. Some people really really want one gender over the other, so it's best if they know up front to avoid gender disappointment. Some people want to plan ahead and have like gender-specific clothes and decor and stuff. Personally, for me, none of that compared to how fun it was to truly be surprised. I've never had a baby where I knew the gender ahead of time, but I would admit that I think it felt a little bit harder to bond with the baby before it was born because I didn't know the gender. But of course that all changed the moment she was born. 

theblondebump

This is super random but when I called my ob to set up my first ultrasound appointment to confirm pregnancy, they couldn’t get me in for several weeks. I was already going to get blood work for something else, so I asked if she could call in an hcg test at the lab. 

When I got the blood test done, I was only 8 DPO and my hcg was 1493! I know the ranges can greatly vary but has anyone else experienced a super high number like that so early??? 

trapperkeeper87

theblondebump said:

This is super random but when I called my ob to set up my first ultrasound appointment to confirm pregnancy, they couldn’t get me in for several weeks. I was already going to get blood work for something else, so I asked if she could call in an hcg test at the lab. 

When I got the blood test done, I was only 8 DPO and my hcg was 1493! I know the ranges can greatly vary but has anyone else experienced a super high number like that so early??? 

Are you absolutely positive on your dates? That seems incredibly high.

kboydbowman

@theblondebump I agree w/ @trapperkeeper87 that it sounds really really high.  I wouldn't be concerned just yet, but it's definitely something to follow-up on.  Maybe your dates are off. Please do NOT be alarmed because there's simply not enough info right now without additional testing, but very high HcG levels can also be indicative of a molar pregnancy.

theblondebump

@trapperkeeper87 @kboydbowman I know!! But I’m positive on the dates. I was doing opk’s three times a day every day and know for sure when my LH surge was and the day I got the blood test was AT MOST 8 DPO. I called my ob after the result came back bc I also was worried about a molar pregnancy and she said there was nothing to worry about whatsoever and that the range of normal is very large. She said she would call in two more hcg tests for me if I wanted to go get additional tests to see how the numbers were progressing, just for peace of mind, but my first ultrasound is next week, so I just figured I’d just wait until then. But I thought I’d ask here to see if anyone else had anything similar because I thought that was CRAZY high! Also, when I tested for the first time, I was 7 DPO so I wasn’t even expecting a positive result and it was a “dye stealer” (super positive!) which I was very surprised about. My husband is convinced it’s twins lol.

kboydbowman

@theblondebump I'm going to go with your cycle was weird and you ovulated way earlier than the sticks said you did.   I agree that at this point waiting on the ultrasound is probably your best bet.

theblondebump

@kboydbowman Hm don’t know about that, but the ob did say the range of normal hcg values is super wide so I guess it was still considered “normal”

elle-0409

TW: 

I had a MMC and D&C back in August when I was living in another state. 

I just set up my first appointment with my local doctor, told them about my history, and asked to have labs done to check my levels. The receptionist said she would put a note in my file to ask the doctor (or whomever), but couldn’t guarantee that it would happen. Anyone know if I could just walk into a Quest or whatever and ask for hcg and progesterone levels? Or do I need a doctor to do this through insurance?

hrh123

I have some travel plans in the next couple months that were made before pregnancy and I’m going back and forth in my head about canceling them. One of the trips is a hut trip to 12,000 feet and the other to Nicaragua where Zika is present. I’d love some guidance, are these trips safe in pregnancy or not? 

laj0217

@hrh123 I just cancelled my trip to NY. It was on my list to ask my doctor about, but then someone told me they were sure they had Covid and just didn’t get tested so they could still fly domestically. I decided I couldn’t rely on other people to make safe choices and went ahead and cancelled. 

kboydbowman

@laj0217 that's pretty much how I'm feeling right now.  We're relying on an "honor system" where a lot of people aren't always that honorable.

kboydbowman

elle-0409 said:

TW: 

Anyone know if I could just walk into a Quest or whatever and ask for hcg and progesterone levels? Or do I need a doctor to do this through insurance?

Maybe go the urgent care route?

elle-0409

@kboydbowman that’s not a bad idea. It turns out that Quest only does qualitative hCG testing, not quantitative. Thanks!

hrh123

Thanks @laj0217 I appreciate the feedback. Traveling seems like too much of risk with Covid and Zika and I am canceling my trips. I also just got off the phone with my OBGYNs office who strongly advises not to travel in Zika areas while pregnant. My priority is on keeping my baby healthy. 

laj0217

@hrh123 it sucks, but I also think I’d have been a nervous wreck the whole time about it too. So, probably for the best. 

whitta1015

Has anyone dealt with really dry skin during pregnancy? Maybe it's the cold weather but, I'm in SC, so it's not that cold. And I also didn't have this last pregnancy. My face is already breaking out some and my legs and face feel really dry. Any tips or product recommendations would be great!

runsonoatmeal

whitta1015 said:

Has anyone dealt with really dry skin during pregnancy? Maybe it's the cold weather but, I'm in SC, so it's not that cold. And I also didn't have this last pregnancy. My face is already breaking out some and my legs and face feel really dry. Any tips or product recommendations would be great!

I’ve always had super dry skin and acne (Nebraska in winter!) so at least these symptoms are familiar! I really like the Bliss body lotions, and the citrus-y scents they come in like grapefruit, lemon, and blood orange. They’re on Amazon and at Target. Acne I’m less helpful with since it seems like products always stop working for me after awhile, but I have found that minimizing any kind of foundation / cc cream and just sticking to moisturizer makes my skin generally happier.

sarahismyname

I have a question.. is anyone else continuing their normal vitamin regimen on top of the prenatal? Or prenatal only? I plan to ask my dr, but don’t see him til February.

laj0217

sarahismyname said:

I have a question.. is anyone else continuing their normal vitamin regimen on top of the prenatal? Or prenatal only? I plan to ask my dr, but don’t see him til February.

I usually take calcium, magnesium, and vitamin c. My doctor approved all of them for continued use, but did say low dose of vitamin c only. I take 250 mg, but since she limited that one, I just stopped it out of an abundance of caution. She laughed at how low the dose was, though, so it probably really was fine. 

trapperkeeper87

sarahismyname said:

I have a question.. is anyone else continuing their normal vitamin regimen on top of the prenatal? Or prenatal only? I plan to ask my dr, but don’t see him til February.

My doctor wants her patients to start prenatals three months before trying to conceive, and said it was a good idea that I stay on it while breastfeeding (which I just stopped in October after 2 years). So I've been on my prenatal for several years now.

Call your doctor today (they should have a nurse's line) and confirm what you're taking. It's better to be safe than sorry. Too much or too little of any particular vitamin can be bad, so it's better to check with the professional who knows your history.

mokay19

@sarahismyname I agree with everyone that you need to talk to your doctor because it’s not just what vitamins but also certain levels that are acceptable. I take prenatal, magnesium, B6, and D3… but those were all approved by my RE and OB last pregnancy. 

kboydbowman

@sarahismyname I'm the wrong person to ask because I'm a WLS patient.  I take ridiculous amounds of vitamins in order to stay alive.  I don't take a special prenatal because my regular multi contains more of everything than a typical prenatal (it's a high ADEK multi).  I also take additional vitamin A (in both retinol and beta carotene form), vitamin D, vitamin E, vitamin K, calcium, and iron, as well as several herbal supplements (cranberry, stinging nettle, apple cider vinegar, probiotics, and elderberry).  A typical day is 16 pills and 11 gummies/chewables.

mokay19

@sarahismyname the comment from @kboydbowman is exactly why we recommend you talk to your doctor. Because retinol and additional Vitamin A is often not recommended during pregnancy, but your doctor will know your situation better than us. Generally, a prenatal contains most your needs though so that should be you baseline ☺️

kboydbowman

@mokay19
that's my point - I literally have to take all that stuff to keep my levels in the normal range, but everyone's needs are different.  My particular form of WLS tends to cause deficits in vitamins A, D, E, and K. I get all of my levels checked every 6 months or so and we adjust my regimen based on what my levels are doing.

raychelwhite

Hi everyone! So I made an appointment with an obgyn and tried to call them today asking for some advice and to get the opinion from a dr and they said they couldn’t give me any answers until they see me in feb for my first appointment. Is this typical? I was kind of hoping that once I was on the list for an appointment I’d have somewhere to call if I had any questions or concerns! Thanks in advance 😊

kboydbowman

If you're not already a patient, no that's not uncommon - they don't know your hx, they haven't examined you, etc.  If you had been going to them for awhile or for previous pregnancies, it might be different.  But ethically, if they don't know you, they can't make recommendations for tx.

trapperkeeper87

raychelwhite said:

Hi everyone! So I made an appointment with an obgyn and tried to call them today asking for some advice and to get the opinion from a dr and they said they couldn’t give me any answers until they see me in feb for my first appointment. Is this typical? I was kind of hoping that once I was on the list for an appointment I’d have somewhere to call if I had any questions or concerns! Thanks in advance 😊

Unfortunately that is typical. As they don't know you or your body (or if you doctor shop or make up symptoms etc.), they can't ethically provide you information like that. I mean this from a place of kindness. My first husband was an addict who died of an overdose and he was definitely one to try and "shop" doctors to get what he wanted.

raychelwhite

@trapperkeeper87 good to know! Thanks! I was a little skeptical but that totally makes sense. So sorry about your first husband, addiction is never an easy thing for anyone involved💕

raychelwhite

@kboydbowman thank you! Makes sense happy to hear it isn’t unusual