@jenn622-2 they offer it at my OB's office for $400 I think. It's much more standard than it used to be. I had my first in Aug 17 and they never brought it up but offered it to me with my May 19 baby and this time. I'll be 32 at delivery so no big push but I think the cost has come down specifically so it's more of a "why not" type thing. I also know that I had some basic carrier screening done which I believe is standard in California. Like, I am a cystic fibrosis carrier. It was actually really good to know as much as it was stressful until we got DH's results. My siblings have a 50% chance of also being carriers and my sister got tested (covered by insurance b/c of my positive) and was positive. So now she knows in advance and when she gets married and decides to start a family, she can have her partner get tested BEFORE they start trying so they aren't already pregnant when they find out. Our kids also have a 50% chance of being carriers. But I think as a STM or TTM it doesn't feel as valuable since everything was fine the first time. I'm less freaked out. These carrier screens test some ridiculous amount of things, though so there's potential for more anxiety. I think mine only tested 5-10 things.
@jenn622-2 DH and I did carrier screens but that was before we got pregnant, so we would know the risks ahead of time.
@bbrahmbhatt DH and I have been talking about it - was thinking potentially a cottage at this resort in Maine I've been eyeing up. We'll see! Of course we had lofty (and warm!) ideas pre-covid, but what are ya gonna do. This place in Maine has an excellent restaurant, the cottages have fire places and you can do things like horse and carriage rides in the snow, seemed cozy Any thoughts on what you might do?
Christmas confession: my girls just showed me what they picked out to ask for for Christmas from the Amazon toy catalog. This list is for grandma (MIL) because we already gave my mom their list. They picked expensive stuff, and stuff with little pieces. I already vetoed the super expensive things and let them pick more reasonably priced toys in their place. I said I’d send the list to grandma but leave it up to her what to buy, so they might not get every single thing on their list.
I’m pretty sure I’m going to edit their lists before I send it to her 😬 I always say “please don’t buy them everything on it,” but she always does, plus some more. So I think I just won’t send her their entire lists. It makes me feel a little bit like I’m lying to my kids, but I also feel like I don’t care. 😂 If I'm honest, they have farrrr too many toys as it is and I’m sick of being the only person in the house to try to keep the pieces together and cleaned up. So...no thanks. 🤷🏻♀️
@bblair24 I think it's smart to edit the list. Keeping all those tiny pieces together is so annoying! All I ever do is clean and bitch at everyone for not helping.
@riff323 it is super annoying! I’m personally not buying them any gifts with pieces. I did buy some hair clips to split between them and those will probably end up all over the house, but at least it’s not like a toy where it’s not worth playing with once pieces get lost. 🤷🏻♀️
@jenn622-2 I had the carrier screen done. When I met with the geneticist she said that new recommendations came out for it and the NIPS to be offered to every woman, regardless of her age. It seemed like it was a fairly new thing for it to be offered to everyone. It turns out I am only a carrier for one out of like 200 or 300 things they test for. We decided that given how rare the thing I'm a carrier for is, MH isn't going to get screened.
ETA: @theblondebump we are in Chicago, so I have no idea what to try to do. Going anywhere around here seems like such a risk. Maybe I'll try to do something at home, but I have no idea what!
@bblair24 I've been wondering about her too. I sent her a message just to say hi and that I was thinking about her, but I didn't hear back.
Has anyone had a resurgence of their nausea in week 16-17? I had been feeling pretty good, and then it was pretty bad yesterday, and not going too well today. Bleh.
@jenn622-2 the carrier screening options and decisions have driven me nuts! My practice outsources the 12 weeks appt for this reason to a Genetic group. The only 'official' ACOG recommendation is that all expectant mothers are educated/counseled about carrier screening and made aware of their options, but the patient may decline any or all screening. With DD I opted to carrier screen for the 3 biggest conditions (statistically): cystic fibrosis, fragileX, and SMA muscular dystrophy. This time around I figured to just get tested for everything considering they made me do the counseling appointment AGAIN and if we have a third baby (our plan) this way I won't have to go through it again.
If your results indicate that you are a carrier for something the recommendation is that your partner also gets screened but only for the conditions you tested positive for, because it's only a concern if you're both carriers. Even then, your LO has a 1 in 4 chance of actually having the condition. I just got my results last week (they screened me for 280+ recessive conditions) and I came back as a carrier for something super rare, but serious where the child won't live past a year. So next step is for DH to be screened...there's a >1% chance that he will test positive. We haven't done it yet and part of me feels like ignorance was bliss the first time around, but where we are.
My genetic counselor said that most women screened will come back as a carrier for something (like upwards of 50%) - I thought that was a lot!! For me I felt it was better to know, but it's very much a personal decision. And, not always covered by insurance!
@jenn622-2 we did IVF so did all the testing on the embryos beforehand
@bbrahmbhatt no baby moon here- I went into labor on my last one and almost gave birth in the car lol! Things are really shutting down with our covid numbers going up so probably will just lay low for a bit until baby comes.
@emeraldisle17 “ignorance is bliss” is kind of my thought on this at the moment... I already have such high anxiety regarding all my other previous pregnancy complications that I’m afraid I’ll find out something that will cause me to needlessly worry over something beyond my control. My sister was tested with her kids and found she was a carrier for a recessive macular degeneration gene but that’s it. I actually have macular issues myself so it’s probable that I’m also a carrier but it wouldn’t change anything about the care the baby or I receive.
@bblair24 I’m with you on the toys! The Amazon toy catalog has become our sons favorite “book”!
@theblondebump a snowy cottage with a fireplace sounds amazing!!
@bbrahmbhatt I wouldn’t exactly call it a resurgence of nausea because mine hasn’t really quit yet 😂 But I’m 17 weeks today and still have some pretty rough days. I have a prescription for Zofran and didn’t take any a couple days ago and was totally fine. It was probably the first day this whole pregnancy that I didn’t even have to think about my stomach. Yesterday I was fine until I was making dinner and it hit me all at once so I took some of the Zofran. I hope you’re back to feeling more normal soon!
@bbrahmbhatt yes! Totally with @bblair24 - not quite sure if it's a full on resurgence for me, but I was definitely starting to feel better at 16 weeks and then hit 17 and took 2 days off my zophran and felt no bueno so I'm back on it....bleh!! I hope both of yall feel better soon!!
@bbrahmbhatt I didn’t have it for two days thought it was gone, sang praises to everyone and then it came back I’ll be 20 weeks tomorrow and it’s still lingering
@theblondebump that place in Maine sounds neat!! My MIL lives in Maine and we love visiting, but we usually only go in the summer. @bbrahmbhatt I know I'm late to the game on this convo but my kids are all very close in age. I got pregnant when my kids were 11 mo, 9 mo, and 13 mo. Especially between my first and second I was sooo ready to have another baby! I was never given any specific instruction on waiting, but the MFM doctor recommended taking extra calcium because that one apparently takes 2 years to return to normal. I actually forgot about that and should probably take that again. I think he actually had me taking tums for the calcium component 🤔 anyway, all that to say close age gaps are possible!
@jenn622-2, I had it done with DS1 back in 2011. They only need to test you, and will offer to test your partner if you come back positive for something. I'm surprised they didn't offer it to you earlier. I had it done at 12w.
I know it's hard to learn results, especially if it won't change whether you choose to continue a pregnancy. But, consider knowing also means being able to be as educated and prepared for the future as possible.
So had my anatomy scan and they found two soft markers CPC and EIF, my first had CPC alone and dr said don’t worry it’s an isolated marker. But this time around I have two soft markers.....anyone eles have/had this? I’m thinking of just going back at 28 weeks for a further scan, I didn’t do any NIPT or other chromos blood work.
This is a true random but I thought maybe someone here might know— my son is in kinder and his best friend just moved here in February from Japan. His parents are limited in their English but so far we’ve managed to communicate a successful meet up for trick or treating, and park dates. We were leaving school the other day and his mom invited us to come to their home to play after school today. I have extremely limited knowledge on Japanese customs but I know I’m going to bring them a small gift (a tin of muffins!) because every time we’ve met up so far they have given us something small! I also know to remove shoes and I know that my husband and I address them by Shingo-san and Yuoki-san. My question though is this-what is the polite way for my son to address his friends’ parents?
@Serenamarr, if you know their names, it would be last name first name San, (Pron Sahn) or just last name San. However, Mr and Mrs Last name is also acceptable. Rarely do Japanese women not take their husband's family name.
Example Hiro and Reiko Matsumoto would be Matsumoto Hiro San and Matsumoto Reiko San Matsumoto San (both) Mr and Mrs Matsumoto
(I studied Japanese for two terms, and wrote a paper on Japanese culture)
@aisukurimsarang thank you! He asked me “what should I call Taichi’s mommy” and I was like ahhhhh that’s a good question! Is there an equivalent to sir or ma’am that’s a general respectful term for a child to use for any adult? His other best friend Ritsuto’s parents we do not know their names. I may have a whole other round of questions when we invite them over here! I just want them to feel welcome and respected because I get the feeling that even though they’ve been here for 10 months we are the first family who have taken the time to try to arrange get togethers and include them in things. Good ol texas.
@Serenamarr, for that, I'd just use Sir and Ma'am. The point will get through. There's not a direction conversational translation. Japanese is all contextual.
I'm starting to think I have an anterior placenta this go round. It would explain why I only feel her when she's super low, and that's the only place we can find the heartbeat. I had one with DS2, but it was also fundal, so it didn't really get in the way. I'll find out more tomorrow during my anatomy scan, but for a mom who has always consistently felt movement by 16w AND is PGAL, it's nerve wracking. I swear, I feel just enough movement to panic when I haven't felt ANY for a few days. (she's currently thumping away just above my pubic bone, so that's reassuring me)
@aisukurimsarang I’m struggling mentally with this too! I have always felt my babies by now (I’m 17 weeks and some days) and I’m still having trouble discerning what’s baby and what isn’t. I’m wondering if it’s due to placenta location for me too, which would be a first. I have my anatomy scan on Thursday and I’m so anxious to see the baby - I need to know that everything is okay!
@bblair24, @riff323 And... confirmed anterior placenta. This little girl is SUPER active and I can't feel ANY of it! The US Tech said to expect it to be more discernable at 20w, when she's bigger.
Edit just seeing how active she was was a huge relief for me. I was worried she wasn't thriving, since I'm at risk for IUGR given my age and BP. Then, since I marathoner all 10 seasons of call the Midwife, my brain had all kinds of scenarios, even though that show is rarely heartbreaking.
@aisukurimsarang yay! Despite this being my 3rd pregnancy, experience with anterior placenta, and normally relaxed personality, I want to feel this baby move! Luckily my anatomy scan and high risk Dr appointment is tomorrow.
@Lexibizzel, yes! Even my previous anterior placenta wasn't a problem. Just this time it's completely upfront and centee. Whereas with DS1, it was up top, so the front was still free.
@aisukurimsarang what a relief to see her being so active! I had an anterior placenta with DS and I did not feel any movement at all until I was around 22 or 23 weeks. My OB was very surprised I wasn't feeling any of the earlier movements because he was very active.
@bbrahmbhatt I got sick with DS at 20 weeks (stomach flu) and everyone told me it can be super common to have nausea return in the second trimester -- blech. hope it passes soon!
@aisukurimsarang I also usually feel a ton of movement and am only feeling it low/getting the heartbeat low this time! Wondering if I’m in the same boat. My scan is on the 23rd so we shall see!
I FINALLY found something that is helping my poor, tired, red, flaky dry face. Good old cetaphil; I started using the gentle daily cleanser and the daily lotion and there is already such a difference! Redness and flakiness are drastically improved, and even better, my face doesn't burn any more!
oh! I'm so glad to hear you say that @bbrahmbhatt ! I just bought cetaphil today at the recommendation of my obgyn! It was one of the many products in my Ulta HAUL today, all products recommended by my ob for my many questions from this week's appointment.
I can't believe that I've only gained 6 lbs so far yet somehow I am still getting stretch marks on my hips!! I know that this is a normal part of pregnancy, but it doesn't mean I have to like it! Ob recommended an exfoliating body wash with gylcolic acid for the acne thats popping up on my back and shoulders. She recommended vitamin E oil for the stretch marks + cetaphil for all over body use to help stay moisturized and avoid stretch marks. I also developed weirdly dry skin near my bikini line and ob recommended to sleep commando and use coconut oil near the lines of my underwear.
Re: Random Thread
@bbrahmbhatt DH and I have been talking about it - was thinking potentially a cottage at this resort in Maine I've been eyeing up. We'll see! Of course we had lofty (and warm!) ideas pre-covid, but what are ya gonna do. This place in Maine has an excellent restaurant, the cottages have fire places and you can do things like horse and carriage rides in the snow, seemed cozy
ETA:
@theblondebump we are in Chicago, so I have no idea what to try to do. Going anywhere around here seems like such a risk. Maybe I'll try to do something at home, but I have no idea what!
@bblair24 I've been wondering about her too. I sent her a message just to say hi and that I was thinking about her, but I didn't hear back.
My practice outsources the 12 weeks appt for this reason to a Genetic group. The only 'official' ACOG recommendation is that all expectant mothers are educated/counseled about carrier screening and made aware of their options, but the patient may decline any or all screening. With DD I opted to carrier screen for the 3 biggest conditions (statistically): cystic fibrosis, fragileX, and SMA muscular dystrophy. This time around I figured to just get tested for everything considering they made me do the counseling appointment AGAIN and if we have a third baby (our plan) this way I won't have to go through it again.
If your results indicate that you are a carrier for something the recommendation is that your partner also gets screened but only for the conditions you tested positive for, because it's only a concern if you're both carriers. Even then, your LO has a 1 in 4 chance of actually having the condition. I just got my results last week (they screened me for 280+ recessive conditions) and I came back as a carrier for something super rare, but serious where the child won't live past a year. So next step is for DH to be screened...there's a >1% chance that he will test positive. We haven't done it yet and part of me feels like ignorance was bliss the first time around, but where we are.
My genetic counselor said that most women screened will come back as a carrier for something (like upwards of 50%) - I thought that was a lot!! For me I felt it was better to know, but it's very much a personal decision. And, not always covered by insurance!
@bbrahmbhatt no baby moon here- I went into labor on my last one and almost gave birth in the car lol! Things are really shutting down with our covid numbers going up so probably will just lay low for a bit until baby comes.
@bblair24 I’m with you on the toys! The Amazon toy catalog has become our sons favorite “book”!
@theblondebump a snowy cottage with a fireplace sounds amazing!!
@bbrahmbhatt I know I'm late to the game on this convo but my kids are all very close in age. I got pregnant when my kids were 11 mo, 9 mo, and 13 mo. Especially between my first and second I was sooo ready to have another baby! I was never given any specific instruction on waiting, but the MFM doctor recommended taking extra calcium because that one apparently takes 2 years to return to normal. I actually forgot about that and should probably take that again. I think he actually had me taking tums for the calcium component 🤔 anyway, all that to say close age gaps are possible!
I know it's hard to learn results, especially if it won't change whether you choose to continue a pregnancy. But, consider knowing also means being able to be as educated and prepared for the future as possible.
Example Hiro and Reiko Matsumoto would be
Matsumoto Hiro San and Matsumoto Reiko San
Matsumoto San (both)
Mr and Mrs Matsumoto
(I studied Japanese for two terms, and wrote a paper on Japanese culture)
Edit just seeing how active she was was a huge relief for me. I was worried she wasn't thriving, since I'm at risk for IUGR given my age and BP. Then, since I marathoner all 10 seasons of call the Midwife, my brain had all kinds of scenarios, even though that show is rarely heartbreaking.
That movement is just so reassuring!