I was planning to tell my boss on our 1:1 on Friday but she got a phone call 2 mins before our meeting ended and had to cut it short. I always feel awkward telling and (I might have shared this already but) her father passed 2 days before my first was born and her husband a month before my second was born so she joked I can't get pregnant again It was obviously all in good fun but also I think so many ppl only have 2 kids and she was just back from her leave after his death when I was still pregnant so even though it feels awkward now, she obviously didn't mean it. She's amazing and has been my boss for 8.5yrs so I'm not worried about telling her, just about more people knowing. Long story long, at this point I might wait a few weeks and tell her after my 16 week appointment.
I’m sorry I didn’t read this whole thread, so it may have been discussed already...but is anyone else holding off from telling your employer because you can due to working remotely?
I’m working remote 100% of the time right now, so I can wait as long as I want to tell my employer. There may be some changes on my team in the coming weeks, so it would be to my benefit to not share the news right now.
Is anyone else holding off? And how long is too long? I’m due end of April, so I’m just 12 weeks now.
I excitedly told them right at 12 weeks with my first, but this time is so different. My return to work after mat leave wasn’t great last time. I ended up stepping down from a management position to go part time. I just recently went back full time, and I really worry what they will think about me doing this all over again...
@BumpingUpto3, I just told mine and I'm almost 15w. We're getting ready to go back in. While I am SOOOO ready, we also had to report anything that may make us "at risk". So, as soon as the NIPT came back, I told them.
@aisukurimsarang I don’t know why but I just always thought it was standard and expected to tell work at 12 weeks. This makes me feel a lot better! I’ll give it a few more weeks
@bumpitup do they have to hire a backfill? I definitely don't think you have to tell right at 12 weeks. I told my boss around 13/14 weeks for both but last pregnancy with my SCH, I told my boss's boss at 17 weeks and my team at 19/20/21 weeks. My boss is remote though and I am not in the office frequently pre-covid. Like I said above, I'll probably wait until 16 weeks now since it has no bearing on anything until Q2. I'm transitioning to remote and moving/buying a house so it's a lot all at once. I'm feeling awkward about telling her b/c someone close to her has died right before I've given birth to both of my children 😢
@bumpitup I would totally wait! I'm not sure what your profession is and if they would need to begin making preparations now for when you're out on mat leave, but if not, I would not hesitate to wait a while. No real reason to rush, in my opinion.
@bumpitup I think it's fine to wait. I ended up telling my boss at the end of last week because too many people had seen/heard me vomiting in the restroom and started asking questions, and I didn't want her to be the last one to find out.
@bumpitup it’s at your discretion when you tell! I’m sorry you have to play the balancing game of telling too early/affecting your position or telling too late/them feeling blindsided. It stinks that in 2020 we still have to tiptoe around workplace discrimination 😕
Since it’s our third we didn’t make a big deal of announcing, I just made a little post.
@bumpitup I think it’s perfectly fine to wait in that instance. My boss was one of the first to know since we’ve all switched to video conferencing remotely and I didn’t want to use my video because I look like a total dump truck lately and had been dry heaving every few minutes so it would have been obviously. Everyone else, we’re trying to wait until as long as possible.
I’m probably one of the only ones, but I’m in the “not announcing” camp. I’ll just tell people when I need to and call it a day. The way I see it, if you’re important enough to me that I talk to you regularly, I’ll tell you in person or on the phone and the rest of the people in my social network via social media just don’t need to know.
I’ve been doing zoom calls with a bunch of my girlfriends on the east coast so during our most recent “get together” I changed my background to a picture of the ultrasound and waited until someone noticed (it only took like 2 seconds before one of my friends caught on!) They knew we were trying so I don’t think anyone was that surprised. We tried to have our 3 y/o tell my in-laws his “big news” about being a big brother but when we told him to share his news he told them about a new toy he got instead! 😂 I guess that was bigger news in his world!
@BuckeyeNut05 I feel the same about announcing on social media. I’m pretty high risk and I feel uncomfortable sharing with people outside of the people I actually speak with regularly. I didn’t publicly share with my first although there was nothing high risk about that pregnancy but it still made me feel uncomfortable. I did make a little post once baby was born and I’ll probably do the same this time as well.
@Lexibizzel, I just took a picture of the test and texted it to my mom and sister, and my BFF. Then, I spent 2 weeks convincing them I was serious! Everyone thought I was kidding and it was a test from my last pregnancy. HAHAHA AisuKurim! Nice try! We're not buying it.
Even my partner when I showed him the test was like.. Is this from DS2? NO!!!
NMIL looked at the US pic and said it was from 2019. SO goes, Mom! Look at the name and date. "Oh! Oh! Really?!"
@BuckeyeNut05 I’m with you on the announcement! I *might* put something on our Christmas card, but I won’t be doing any social media announcement, for the same reason. If we’re close enough with someone that we want them to know, we’ll make sure they know! I also oddly work in marketing, but hate social media, lol.
@kvh22 I'm sorry to hear that....I can imagine that's not necessarily going to be a fun conversation with your boss. If nothing else it will bring back those tough memories. I'm kinda in a similar situation with it not being an exciting conversation with my boss. He's been very open with me about him and his wife's struggles with infertility. I was really hoping that he would have news before me, but that hasn't happened. I'm really dreading the conversation. His whole employment has revolved around me being a mom...he was only hired after I stepped down from my management role to be a PT-SAHM after my first was born. I'm back to FT now, so I think it will just start the cycle all over again.
Thanks ladies! @runsoncoffee I swear I start showing sooner and sooner with each kid. First time I still had nothing at 6 months. Second kid was around 5 months. Now here I am not even 16 weeks looking like a pumpkin smuggler 🎃
I’m in the same boat with being high risk, and then working remote. We were supposed to go back (I was 8wks @ the time) & I got a note from my Dr just stating I was under their care. Every week or two someone asks me if I’m doing okay which is kind, however I just want to say yea I’m pregnant and not going back foe the winter... however I’ve held it in and I am going to talk to my HR rep after this weeks dr apt to see how things are going and after that since virtually things should go unnoticed I’m going to wait as long as possible... probably 20/22 weeks. I don’t think they will be surprised because I’ve announced before and sadly had a loss so I think they will understand the reasoning for waiting. Either way- shouldn’t the rule be it’s your body and your family and as long as we’re giving enough time to finalize and prep all details.... then you’re welcome for the information? Lol
I just told my advisor yesterday (I'm 14 weeks today). I wanted to give him a decent heads up since this affects my plan moving forward and the work we are doing together. We have told all our immediate family members at this point. We're just waiting on bloodwork (not the NIPT, just whatever they do with the NT scan) to tell extended family. I've been telling friends as I speak to them. I don't think we'll do a social media announcement either like some others.
@serenamarr cute pic! I meant to take a family pic on our weekend trip last month but forgot the US pics. We're getting our holiday photos done at the end of next month, so it looks like that might be our "announcement" now since I'm already showing.
Work has always been second to know, after my husband - first pregnancy because of radiation exposure on swallow studies. This pregnancy, to get COVID accommodations approved through HR.
We announced on FB yesterday! I mainly chose yesterday because we’ve been meeting with our youth students on Wednesday nights on the playground at church and I’m just tired of trying to hide my bump, haha. Everyone was really excited, and my favorite part was that our students were just blowing up my phone yesterday. They were all so excited, and then couldn’t stop talking to me about it last night - boys and girls alike! It made us feel so loved!
Tomorrow is SOs birthday, so I got a card and signed it from everyone and added DD2's name (Zoe) to it. I'm going to get DS1 to read it while SO opens a Onsie that says "I'm just a Girl in love with her Dad".
YAY I FINALLY got my results! Low risk for everything and it’s a boy! I’m shocked ... totally thought it was a girl. Now we can finally share on social!
We've been telling family and close friends gradually. Finally decided to go ahead and post something on social media, so I made the image in the spoiler in a software program I have and shared it.
@goldpolkadot, it went a little differently than planned but this was better.
SO was reading the card and DS1 shoulder surfed it, and "Wait.. What's this last name? (SO handed him the card) Who's Z.. Z... ZO-E?" He turned and looked at SO who has the Onesie in his hands. "You're having another baby?! Really??? Is this a joke? A girl????" Then, as reality set in, "I told you to make me another BROTHER!"
Me: I don't have much control over that. DS1: You were supposed to tell your essence to make boys only. DD1: How do you think *I* feel??? I've been the only girl (she has 5 brothers) for 24 YEARS!!!
But, after the shock wore off, and we told him we aren't making an 8yo responsible for entertaining his baby sister, he's getting excited.
Re: How/when are you planning to announce?
I was planning to tell my boss on our 1:1 on Friday but she got a phone call 2 mins before our meeting ended and had to cut it short. I always feel awkward telling and (I might have shared this already but) her father passed 2 days before my first was born and her husband a month before my second was born so she joked I can't get pregnant again
Last time, I waited until I was showing.
Since it’s our third we didn’t make a big deal of announcing, I just made a little post.
@BuckeyeNut05 I feel the same about announcing on social media. I’m pretty high risk and I feel uncomfortable sharing with people outside of the people I actually speak with regularly. I didn’t publicly share with my first although there was nothing high risk about that pregnancy but it still made me feel uncomfortable. I did make a little post once baby was born and I’ll probably do the same this time as well.
Even my partner when I showed him the test was like.. Is this from DS2? NO!!!
NMIL looked at the US pic and said it was from 2019. SO goes, Mom! Look at the name and date. "Oh! Oh! Really?!"
Work has always been second to know, after my husband - first pregnancy because of radiation exposure on swallow studies. This pregnancy, to get COVID accommodations approved through HR.
Congrats @juliebird6!!! 💙💙💙
@aisukurimsarang cute!! How did it go over?!
@bblair24 so fun!!!
SO was reading the card and DS1 shoulder surfed it, and "Wait.. What's this last name? (SO handed him the card) Who's Z.. Z... ZO-E?" He turned and looked at SO who has the Onesie in his hands. "You're having another baby?! Really??? Is this a joke? A girl????" Then, as reality set in, "I told you to make me another BROTHER!"
Me: I don't have much control over that.
DS1: You were supposed to tell your essence to make boys only.
DD1: How do you think *I* feel??? I've been the only girl (she has 5 brothers) for 24 YEARS!!!
But, after the shock wore off, and we told him we aren't making an 8yo responsible for entertaining his baby sister, he's getting excited.