Hello, let me introduce myself first..
For the first 30 years of my life, everything was smooth and worry-free. I was my parents’ most beloved child, found my true love in college, and happily married him after graduation.
At work, I was my boss’s most valued employee. Whenever I was in charge of a project, colleagues would inevitably say, “Oh, then I’m totally at ease.” I was constantly named “Employee of the Year,” with generous bonuses every year.
Later, I started my own business. Within just three months, I had broken into the market and started making money. By the fifth month, I was earning twice my previous salary. Growth was steady month after month. Right when the business needed more hands, I serendipitously met an amazing partner, and the company reached a whole new level.
Really, it seemed like at every step, whatever I needed, a pair of hands would always place it right in front of me, just in time.
My Two Girls: Ellie & Mia
Meet Ellie, My Firstborn
In 2020, my husband and I decided to have a child. After trying for over a year, we finally got the news in 2021 that a little one was on the way. In 2022, we welcomed our first child, Ellie. She made me a mother.
She is utterly adorable—big eyes, rosy skin, chubby little hands. Every time I look at her, I can’t help but give her a kiss. She is pure joy, and I love her more each day.
But as a first-time mom, I faced unprecedented difficulties. The postpartum tearing wouldn’t heal, and the pain was excruciating. Clogged milk ducts made my breasts hard as rocks. The severe sleep deprivation… And what was even more crushing was that, with zero parenting experience, I was clueless when faced with her unexplained wailing, night terrors, refusal to nurse, constipation, diarrhea, fevers… I desperately searched online, longing for one accurate, truly useful answer!
It was during this time that I thought, once I make it through this “dark” path, I must leave a light on for other new moms.
And Then Came Mia
Ellie had just turned one when I got pregnant again. In 2024, we welcomed our second daughter, Mia.
Completely different from Ellie, Mia is a great eater and sleeper. Although she had her fussy moments in the first two months, starting almost from month three, she became super easygoing. She feeds on schedule, gradually sleeps through the night, loves her solid foods, and adapted quickly when I had to stop breastfeeding due to mastitis.
This made me realize just how vastly different babies can be! It made me even more determined to write about my experiences.
Why I Had to Start This Blog
The Catalyst: A Life Pivoted
After Mia was born, my business also began to decline sharply. I had no choice but to close it and become a full-time mom. My work no longer involves Excel and Word, but instead revolves around changing diapers, washing bottles, making baby food, and managing household chores…
This has been a monumental challenge for me. All my past achievements seem irrelevant now. Managing two young children has brought me a sense of frustration I’ve never known before.
The Daily Reality
They are always fighting over things. When one is in my arms, the other immediately demands to be held too. When I try to cook, Ellie wants me to read her a book. When I attempt to load the washing machine, Mia has a diaper blowout, and I must drop everything to change her…
By the time I finish all that, I see the cup of hot coffee on the table has gone cold again. And it’s not until evening that I remember, “Oh my goodness, the clothes are still in the hamper, unwashed!”
Of course, being a mom is filled with happiness, but that doesn’t negate how hard it is.
My Promise to You
Because I’ve walked this path myself, I won’t just tell you how joyful motherhood is, like many websites do. I want to share my real, unfiltered experiences so every new mom can find a “companion” here.
I want to tell you: you are not alone. What you’re going through, I’ve been there too. Your breakdowns, your helplessness, your moments of losing control—I’ve had them all. You don’t need to feel guilty. This is just a small, necessary stretch of the journey for every mom.
My Hope for This Space
I really want to share my parenting experiences—not just the warm, glowing moments, but to honestly document the pitfalls I’ve stumbled into, the tears I’ve shed, and the “survival wisdom” I’ve scraped together in utter exhaustion.
The Goal: A Mom’s Toolkit
I hope this blog becomes a “mom’s toolkit,” filled not with vague theories, but with:
- Practical Tips: Like how to quickly figure out why a baby is crying, tried-and-true methods for dealing with clogged ducts, or how to efficiently manage the daily grind with twins (or two under two) solo.
- Pitfall Avoidance Guides: Sharing the baby products I regret buying the most, and those “game-changer” parenting hacks. Letting you know which parenting anxieties you can let go of, and which principles are worth holding onto.
- A Community for Moms: I hope my stories connect me with more moms like you. We can cheer each other on in the comments, share our own tricks, turning the storms we face alone into a journey we walk together.
The Bigger Vision
My previous career taught me to analyze data, solve problems, and optimize processes. Now, I’m applying all those skills to this new “position” of Mom. I want to prove that a mom’s value is absolutely not confined to the home. The mindset, resilience, and creativity we built in our careers can shine just as brightly—perhaps even brighter—in this more complex, long-term “project” of raising humans, and can even be transformed into a force that helps others.
My hope is simple: that every mom who opens this blog can let out a sigh of relief and say, “So it’s not just me.” Then, she can find a bit of practical info, a dose of comforting solidarity, and return to her sweet, chaotic mom-life with a little more confidence and a little less weight on her shoulders.
This road? Let’s walk it together.
Re: January 2020 IVF
My story in signature spoiler. Children mentioned.
I don't produce FSH, so no natural menstrual cycle. DH has reduced morphology.
Summer 2014 IUI (with first husband): cancelled after almost a month of stims due to too many follicles
Time off to divorce, get back on my feet, find a new hubby and get married again 💑
March 2017 IVF#1: ~70 follicles, 13R, 10M, 7F, 3B = 2 PGS Normal (both XY) - no transfer due to ohss
Sept 2017 FET#1: BFP, Beta#1 (10dpt) - 253, Beta#2 (12dpt) - 528, DS born 05/31/2018 👨👩👦
Dec 2019 FET#2: BFN
Changed clinic, planning March 2020 IVF#2 - postponed due to the pandemic
April 2020 IVF #2: ~30 follicles, 24R, 12M, 8F, 4B = 2XY & 2XX, all normal
Sept 2020 FET#3: one XX embryo, BFP, Beta#1 (9dpt) - 161, Beta#2 (11dpt) - 519, Beta#3 (19dpt) - 7174, Due date 05/30/2021
DD born 05/23/2021 👨👩👧👦 - My family is now complete
My egg retrieval is tomorrow morning and I'm nervous but excited. Yours will be here before you know it!
@Lippert1 - Does your protocol only call for Follistim? What did you use before?
@lunagirlnyc - Keeping my FX crossed for you!
@eggcellent - Good luck on your egg retrieval today! Keep us updated! Sending positive vibes. And follistim was also my favorite! lol.
Can I just say... I'm so thankful the advancements and research that have brought medical science to where it is today... giving all of us a chance to build families no matter our fertility challenges! My husband and I are struggling with fertility due to a balanced translocation, so our process is ICSI + embryo biopsy and PGS testing. Thinking of all the amazing and talented medical professionals involved in the process of making our dreams come true is really humbling!
@lunagirlnyc - Sending good luck to you! Something about the evenness of the year "2020" makes me feel like it's a lucky year. I really hope it's your time!!
@Lippert1 - Sounds a lot like my drug protocol. I hope it goes well for you - fingers crossed for zero side effects and many many eggs!
@eggcellent - Yay on the successful retrieval! 20 is a great number! And I hear you on the advancements.
That's a great amount @eggcellent! Unfortunately, we did not have any left over to freeze and transferred two embryos yesterday. Sorry you have to wait so long for an update. That would drive me crazy. Hang in there!
My story in signature spoiler. Children mentioned.
I don't produce FSH, so no natural menstrual cycle. DH has reduced morphology.
Summer 2014 IUI (with first husband): cancelled after almost a month of stims due to too many follicles
Time off to divorce, get back on my feet, find a new hubby and get married again 💑
March 2017 IVF#1: ~70 follicles, 13R, 10M, 7F, 3B = 2 PGS Normal (both XY) - no transfer due to ohss
Sept 2017 FET#1: BFP, Beta#1 (10dpt) - 253, Beta#2 (12dpt) - 528, DS born 05/31/2018 👨👩👦
Dec 2019 FET#2: BFN
Changed clinic, planning March 2020 IVF#2 - postponed due to the pandemic
April 2020 IVF #2: ~30 follicles, 24R, 12M, 8F, 4B = 2XY & 2XX, all normal
Sept 2020 FET#3: one XX embryo, BFP, Beta#1 (9dpt) - 161, Beta#2 (11dpt) - 519, Beta#3 (19dpt) - 7174, Due date 05/30/2021
DD born 05/23/2021 👨👩👧👦 - My family is now complete
Best of luck to the rest of the ladies in the group!
@hopengrace and @eggcellent - updates? Or are you both still in wait mode?
@Lippert1 - I was on Follistim+Menopur (with Ganerelix to prevent early ovulation). Follistim was by far my favorite of the medications to use, so it's nice you get to use just that one! I only stimmed for 7 days, but was a fast responder and my estrogen went up really quickly so I triggered on the 8th day. My doctor said Follistim protocols usually take 8-12 days for most women. Good luck on an easy stim, hope you get a bazillion eggs!!
@Lippert1 I start medications saturday. This is my fourth mini ivf so protocol is always the same. 150 gonal, 1 chlomid, and 2 letrozole tabs. Normally stim 12 days. First retrieval had one pgs normal and strong but failed fet. 2nd ivf had 1 mosaic so iced. Then third had one unknown and one strong. The strong sadly didn’t stick. So trying again to get more in terms of quantify. I have issues with too much progesterone for fet’s. Good luck!
@lunagirlnyc - how did you know you had too much progesterone?
I hope the Follistim works quickly. It is crazy how everyone’s body’s react so differently. I think the only negative I have experienced so far is being a bit overly emotional, but I’m cutting myself some slack. For Pete’s sake! 🤣
@lunagirlnyc good luck with starting your meds! I hope this is your cycle!
Thank you ALL for being a great place to come and chat! I have amazing family and friends, and it’s not their fault, but most of them are uncomfortable talking about it. It’s SO nice to have an outlet! 🤗
My story in signature spoiler. Children mentioned.
I don't produce FSH, so no natural menstrual cycle. DH has reduced morphology.
Summer 2014 IUI (with first husband): cancelled after almost a month of stims due to too many follicles
Time off to divorce, get back on my feet, find a new hubby and get married again 💑
March 2017 IVF#1: ~70 follicles, 13R, 10M, 7F, 3B = 2 PGS Normal (both XY) - no transfer due to ohss
Sept 2017 FET#1: BFP, Beta#1 (10dpt) - 253, Beta#2 (12dpt) - 528, DS born 05/31/2018 👨👩👦
Dec 2019 FET#2: BFN
Changed clinic, planning March 2020 IVF#2 - postponed due to the pandemic
April 2020 IVF #2: ~30 follicles, 24R, 12M, 8F, 4B = 2XY & 2XX, all normal
Sept 2020 FET#3: one XX embryo, BFP, Beta#1 (9dpt) - 161, Beta#2 (11dpt) - 519, Beta#3 (19dpt) - 7174, Due date 05/30/2021
DD born 05/23/2021 👨👩👧👦 - My family is now complete
Hi All - I’m new to the boards. I’m 40 years old... going to be 41 in March. I’m doing my first IVF cycle this month. I’m on day 7 of stim meds (450 Gonal F / 150 Menopur). I went this morning for a monitoring appointment and have 7 follicles but they are not growing very fast. My nurse said they were measuring around 7 millimeters. So back on Wednesday to see if there is any change. My nurse then started talking about how my doctor may want to have a conversation with me on next steps and if we should continue with stim meds and it really upset me. I mean you always know there is a chance it may not work out, but I didn’t think we would be thinking about this so soon. Its kind of interesting because I seem to have done so much better on clomid when doing the 2 IUIs I tried before going to this round of IVF. Can anyone offer details on Mini IVF? Was just hoping to hear other stories of women with great outcomes that was slow out of the gate. I feel like I can’t get a break. My husband and I put our lives on hold to take care of my father who was suffering from dementia and a stroke. He passed away last year and we just want to have a family... I just want one.
I was going to have a whole new protocol for IVF 3. One that I came up with but my RE was willing to try. But my SO and I decided to take a month off in December and start IVF again in January.