@lioness_389 I'm so sorry. It must be super frustrating to hear about how your nausea "should" be subsiding by now. Have any of your doctors mentioned hyperemesis? A friend of mine was diagnosed after struggling to have her symptoms taken seriously by her doctors. I believe she was able to find a support group for other pregnant women with hyperemesis (online or otherwise, I'm not quite sure). Be sure to make your self-care (both physical and emotional) a priority. Have you been able to continue working?
I can't keep putting off telling work. I have started telling my friends, one at a time though. Breaking the news really causes me extreme anxiety and I end up feeling horrible for hours afterwards. I need time to recover from it. I'm so convinced at this point that I'm going to burst into tears at work about it and I am just at a loss.
I'm trying to figure out why sharing the news makes me so anxious...I think it's acknowledging that this is really happening and that my life as it is now is over. Also, the first friend I told has basically walked away from our friendship since I told her (she has fertility struggles) and that's made me so wary of talking about it.
@bookworm492 I'm sorry to hear about your friend's reaction. Hopefully she will come around once she has had some time to process the news. As for work, you could certainly continue to wait until you feel more comfortable and ready to share. But I also wonder if it will be a relief and weight off your mind once you do tell them? It may go better than you think!
@blueskychicago12 I don't know, it's been months now. I used to reach out to her on social media and text and she'd respond, but she stopped reaching out to me and shows no interest in getting together (which would be easy, we're literally neighbors) so I'm walking away from it at this point and stopping contact.
I'm going to tell work this week, I have to just get it over with at some point. I really wish I'd been at this job at least a year. I try to remind myself that no matter what happens it's not the end of the world.
@blueskychicago12 When I went to the ER, my discharge papers said hyperemesis. I have a friend that linked me with another pregnant woman who has worse hyperemesis than me and she’s given me some tips. Work has been hard. I’ve had accidents while vomiting in the bathroom and I’ve had to just leave work. My OB finally wrote me a 3 month prescription for Reglan which they gave me in the ER, so I’ve been feeling better.
@blueskychicago12 I was going to tomorrow.... then my boss decided to take the day off!!! I guess next week. I wasn't up for it today since I knew I was putting my cat down tonight.
I'm feeling pretty down today which really sucks. Because of putting my cat down, and waking up in excruciating pain from what I think is round ligament pulling. The pain is gone now but it took about 9 hours before it went away.
My parents are in town today because we are having our city hall ceremony tomorrow. I am trying to cheer up!
Struggling a bit this week. I think it mostly has to do with the physical discomfort I've been feeling with my back pain flaring up, but I've kind of just been going through the motions all week, and don't feel super supported. My husband is great, but anyone else I've tried to talk to has kind of blown me off...especially my mom, when really, I just need my mom to be a mom this week.
I got a new PT, which is good, so my first appointment is next Tuesday--I'm hoping they can help me more than my last PT. And it wasn't for lack of trying on my part--I was doing my exercises as instructed, every single day, and was not seeing progress. So I'm nervous that I switch to another PT, only for the same thing to happen.
I was pretty frustrated with my mom yesterday, when I was telling her I had switched and expressing my nervousness, only for her to say, "Well, Rachel, I hope you know the difference between pain and discomfort. Because of course you're going to be uncomfortable when you're pregnant. But you shouldn't be in regular pain." To which I responded pretty curtly, "I know the difference, Mom. And I'm in pain. I've been in pain for going on three years now." And she just said, "Okay, fine, well, I don't want to talk about this right now."
Thanks. Just...thanks for that, Mom.
And it kind of sent me into a spiral about every other little nitpicky thing she's ever said to me about MY body. She's severely overweight and has her own body image issues, but the problem is, she sometimes projects her insecurities onto me and my sister, and my emotions are at an all time high about it because of the pregnancy, when usually I'm able to just roll my eyes and blow it off. All I could think about was the comment the other week she made about how my arms and butt were looking bigger, or how growing up, my sister was the "skinny minnie" and I was "the chubby one," or how I need to be careful with this pregnancy so I "don't get chubby again," or how even 10 years ago, when I got into running, she made the comment, "I don't know why you're running, you don't have the body type for it." 5 half marathons and countless 5ks and 8ks later...gee, thanks. But I haven't been able to do a half marathon in a couple years BECAUSE I'VE BEEN IN PAIN. Which apparently in her mind, is something that should be questioned, and something I might not ACTUALLY be experiencing.
And it's not like this is a regular thing. It's only a couple times a year she's like this, when she's under her own stresses. She's actually most of the time a wonderful lady and super supportive and sweet and kind...but yeah. Not this week. And it's frustrating.
So yeah. Not doing so hot this week. Not feeling great about myself, not feeling great about this pregnancy, not feeling great about the future and how that's going to look...just not feeling great at all.
@rjgmcmanus don't blame you that's really annoying and uncool what she said. Good luck with the new pt.
I've been meaning to find a pelvic floor pt, I have a lot of tailbone pain when walking which I'm allmost certain related to how the pelvic floor muscles attach to ther tailbone.
I haven't had the greatest week either. Just really hitting home in 18 weeks or so it won't just be me any more. But it seems like I'm better able to manage it and not let it take over my whole day at least.
@bookworm492 Thank you...and thanks for reading. I know it was a long post, but I've been penting it all up for a few days now, and just needed to get it out somewhere. I hope you're able to get a PT soon--being in pain is no fun, especially while pregnant. And I'm sorry you're not having a great week either...the same thing kind of hit me this week too, and it's a little nerve wracking, thinking about that change. I get it.
@rjgmcmanus I'm not in pain, but I've been feeling super down about my body this week. So I hear you. I never thought I'd be this way. I think pregnant bodies are so cool! But I just miss myself. I'm sick of going to bed three hours before my husband, surrounded by pillows. I'm sick of this constant thick, tight feeling. I feel like sometimes I'm just a vessel and it makes me...really unhappy. It's just this week that it's been like this. I think because there's so far to go in the pregnancy and I know it's going to get worse. I'm irrationally sad that my husband is playing tennis with a friend of ours today. He and I always play together and he didn't even ask me. He doesn't think I can still play? This all makes no sense and it's not something to be upset about, but it's been building for a few days and I want to just let it go and accept where I'm at. Instead I feel like crying about a stupid tennis game! I know this will pass. But right now I just feel bad.
@rjgmcmanus I'm sorry to hear you're having a tough week! The back pain sounds really stressful and I can understand how that could really get you down. And it stinks that your mom couldn't provide the support you were needing. I feel like this is a tough stretch of pregnancy because the discomforts are really kicking in, but there's still a lot of time to go. On one hand, I'd like the time to pass quickly, but on the other, I am nervous about the baby's arrival! Lots of ups and downs on this journey. Hugs and best wishes. Hope you get some good news on the PT front.
@blueskychicago12 Thank you. Yeah, not totally digging this part of pregnancy. Lots of ups and downs like you said.
@brrrrrrrrie I'm sorry you're frustrated too. I'd be feeling the same way if my husband left me out, even if it wasn't intentionally meant to be that way.
Hope you both feel better too...pregnancy is rough.
@rjgmcmanus I’ve been struggling with my mom through this pregnancy too. When I told her I was pregnant, the first thing out of her mouth was, “Well that should put you in a better mood.” Turns out she was upset that I hadn’t returned an email the previous weekend...🤷♀️
Anyway, hang in there. Everything you are feeling is valid!
@midgerose86 Oh, that's awful! I'm so sorry that was her response. I probably would've cried.
Doing better today...just decided to play things a little closer to the chest, after a convo with my sister. She's not pregnant, but she's getting picked on a bit too right now. My parents are in the midst of a huge life change with moving across the country, and neither are reacting well, and both are taking their stresses out on us. It's kind of best that at the moment, the less material we give them, the less likely they are to get pissy, and the less stress we put ourselves under because of it.
But yeah. After their move and they're settled in, we've decided to have a talk with them about some of this. Because it hasn't been okay.
Re: Depression & Pregnancy
I'm trying to figure out why sharing the news makes me so anxious...I think it's acknowledging that this is really happening and that my life as it is now is over. Also, the first friend I told has basically walked away from our friendship since I told her (she has fertility struggles) and that's made me so wary of talking about it.
I'm going to tell work this week, I have to just get it over with at some point. I really wish I'd been at this job at least a year. I try to remind myself that no matter what happens it's not the end of the world.
My parents are in town today because we are having our city hall ceremony tomorrow. I am trying to cheer up!
I got a new PT, which is good, so my first appointment is next Tuesday--I'm hoping they can help me more than my last PT. And it wasn't for lack of trying on my part--I was doing my exercises as instructed, every single day, and was not seeing progress. So I'm nervous that I switch to another PT, only for the same thing to happen.
I was pretty frustrated with my mom yesterday, when I was telling her I had switched and expressing my nervousness, only for her to say, "Well, Rachel, I hope you know the difference between pain and discomfort. Because of course you're going to be uncomfortable when you're pregnant. But you shouldn't be in regular pain." To which I responded pretty curtly, "I know the difference, Mom. And I'm in pain. I've been in pain for going on three years now." And she just said, "Okay, fine, well, I don't want to talk about this right now."
Thanks. Just...thanks for that, Mom.
And it kind of sent me into a spiral about every other little nitpicky thing she's ever said to me about MY body. She's severely overweight and has her own body image issues, but the problem is, she sometimes projects her insecurities onto me and my sister, and my emotions are at an all time high about it because of the pregnancy, when usually I'm able to just roll my eyes and blow it off. All I could think about was the comment the other week she made about how my arms and butt were looking bigger, or how growing up, my sister was the "skinny minnie" and I was "the chubby one," or how I need to be careful with this pregnancy so I "don't get chubby again," or how even 10 years ago, when I got into running, she made the comment, "I don't know why you're running, you don't have the body type for it." 5 half marathons and countless 5ks and 8ks later...gee, thanks. But I haven't been able to do a half marathon in a couple years BECAUSE I'VE BEEN IN PAIN. Which apparently in her mind, is something that should be questioned, and something I might not ACTUALLY be experiencing.
And it's not like this is a regular thing. It's only a couple times a year she's like this, when she's under her own stresses. She's actually most of the time a wonderful lady and super supportive and sweet and kind...but yeah. Not this week. And it's frustrating.
So yeah. Not doing so hot this week. Not feeling great about myself, not feeling great about this pregnancy, not feeling great about the future and how that's going to look...just not feeling great at all.
I've been meaning to find a pelvic floor pt, I have a lot of tailbone pain when walking which I'm allmost certain related to how the pelvic floor muscles attach to ther tailbone.
I haven't had the greatest week either. Just really hitting home in 18 weeks or so it won't just be me any more. But it seems like I'm better able to manage it and not let it take over my whole day at least.
@brrrrrrrrie I'm sorry you're frustrated too. I'd be feeling the same way if my husband left me out, even if it wasn't intentionally meant to be that way.
Hope you both feel better too...pregnancy is rough.
Anyway, hang in there. Everything you are feeling is valid!
Doing better today...just decided to play things a little closer to the chest, after a convo with my sister. She's not pregnant, but she's getting picked on a bit too right now. My parents are in the midst of a huge life change with moving across the country, and neither are reacting well, and both are taking their stresses out on us. It's kind of best that at the moment, the less material we give them, the less likely they are to get pissy, and the less stress we put ourselves under because of it.
But yeah. After their move and they're settled in, we've decided to have a talk with them about some of this. Because it hasn't been okay.