December 2019 Moms
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QUESTION Thread

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Re: QUESTION Thread

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    @ktmaesim my husband has even commented on how big I've gotten in the last week. I was telling him I'm already feeling like a whale, but have so long to go I have to remind myself I'm only going to get bigger. 
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    @ktmaesim I noticed my old stretch marks from previous pregnancies have become noticeable and have a bit of color to them, so I assume we are having a growth spurt.  And I have been extra hungry too.
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    @ktmaesim oh yes. Hard to believe there are 18 more weeks of this. My stomach is so hard and round. It's so strange. 
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    Also feeling enormous over here! Got offered a seat on public transportation for the first time today 😬 (of course it was offered by an older woman!!)

    Question for all of you healthcare/insurance experts out there: what’s the best way to get an estimate on the cost of giving birth at my hospital? I’m switching over to a 10% coinsurance plan and trying to understand what that actually adds up to for a vaginal birth or a c-section...
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    @midgerose86 you should be able to call your health insurance company and ask about it.  When I called mine, I ended up still confused, but I was newly pregnant with tons of questions so I got overwhelmed.  If you have just a few specific questions it may go better.
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    @midgerose86 the best way to get a good estimate is to call with CPT codes and icd10 codes and the cost of the codes.  You can get them from your doctor.  Be sure and specify you want the hospital fee and the doctor’s fee because they charge separately.  Also ask about anesthesia fees too.  There are a bunch of smaller, unpredictable codes involved, but they should be able to give you the major ones to give you an idea of what you owe.
    Be sure to write down who/when you talk to the insurance company too.
    i did this with my dd, and the insurance company misquoted that I would not owe a $500 copay for being admitted to the hospital, and I appealed the claim, and won, so the insurance company ended up paying that portion.
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    @midgerose86 it’s hard to say right now as there’s a couple months before you give birth. If you have a 10% plan, I’m thinking you have to hit your deductible before insurance kicks in and then they cover 90%. If this is the case all of your dr’s apts for the time being will be 100% out of pocket till you reach that deductible number. A good idea is look at your max out of pocket for the year, and you’ll probably hit that number when all said and done. 
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    midgerose86midgerose86 member
    edited August 2019
    Thanks @ale9687, my deductible is only $150 so I hit that back when we first got pregnant. My max out of pocket for just me is $2K, but our family max is $4K...anyone know whether the birth costs count toward the family max?
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    Hey ladies! Have any of you ever experienced/are currently experiencing a pregnancy with a condition called “placenta circumvallate” - went in for my 20 week ultrasound a couple weeks ago to be diagnosed with that and found out my baby boy is small for his gestational age. The placental abnormality means that baby doesn’t get as many nutrients as he should. He’s otherwise looking healthy and strong so far aside from his tiny size but I can’t help but feel so worried for him. The doc said they’ll have to keep a close eye on me and him to track his development. Just curious if any other moms have experience with this and how their pregnancy went/is going?
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    @midgerose86 if I remember correctly from my previous birth once I had DS I had to change my plan so my MOOP increased and all of the charges went towards that higher number. It takes a little while for the hospital and doctors to process the charges and bill you so by the time they come through your insurance plan will be changed to include a child. Whatever money you have spent up until birth on your old plan will still be counted towards your new plan. 
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    Okay, so... I'm so tired. I know that being tired in pregnancy is normal, but this is really interfering with my life. I work full time, and by Friday evening I am dead to the world. I took my big girls (and I guess I took my baby, too, lol) to a festival this weekend. We left in the morning before it got too hot, only planned to stay a couple of hours, and I was completely done. I took a nap Friday, Saturday, and Sunday, after sleeping at least 8 hrs at night. Its just really started messing with my life... It was a struggle to get my older kids what they needed and where they needed to be. I'm wondering if I'm anemic or have some bigger problem making me so tired. I absolutely couldn't do this if my husband didn't help a lot. I have an OB appt tomorrow and I'm not sure how to ask about this without sounding stupid, "Uh... I'm pregnant and tired." 
    DD#1 - 12/09  
    DD#2 - 7/13  
    Baby #3 due 1/19, m/c 6/18  
    DD#3 due 12/19!
     
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    @janiep81 I think you just lay out what you just laid out here - it doesn't sound stupid to me!

    Basically you expect to be tired to a certain degree but you are also interested in finding out if there are any other factors like anemia that may be contributing to how you're feeling. 
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    @pvvasel I haven't experienced this, but can definitely understand being worried. I truly hope things go well for you! Hope you find another mom who is going or went through something so you have some additional support.
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    @janiep81 I’m glad they’re checking your thyroid. As soon as I got pregnant my dr upped my dosage immediately. Even if you’ve never had issues in the past pregnancy requires more from your body so that could be the case with you. 
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    @janiep81 - so glad he heard you, well done for speaking up.
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    @midgerose86 is your husband on your plan with you? if so you are already subject to the family oop max (with BCBS at least). it's not like you each are a $2k oop max, its just one big $4k pool for you (and most likely baby wont up your oop max).
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    Is anyone feeling movement on any kind of a schedule yet? I'm 23 weeks tomorrow and my doctor said that by our next visit (27 weeks) I should have a sense of when baby usually moves and what is normal for her. There are still lots of pretty quiet times and I haven't noticed a schedule besides movement after I eat. I'm curious if yours already have some kind of noticeable pattern. 
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    cpk3535cpk3535 member
    edited August 2019
    @brrrrrrrrie I’ve noticed a semi-pattern!  Definitely after dinner, usually when I lay down for bed a few hours later, and in the morning after I’ve been up for a bit (usually after a breakfast snack).  Night time is the easiest to predict.  Sometimes I’m surprised that she’s not moving after I eat, but hey, a baby sleeps a lot!

    Also: I’m at 25W3D 😊
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    @brrrrrrrrie I'm 22w, and I've been wondering the same thing! It's only been in the last two weeks or so that baby has been noticeably moving. I'm like @cpk3535 -- I can feel baby usually in the morning (if I'm sitting down after breakfast), or in the evening. It's not reliable, though. 
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    @brrrrrrrrie - 23 weeks and still not feeling hardly any movement. I have an anterior placenta though and was told it is very normal to not feel her much at this point. I do feel disappointed about not feeling her much. But hopefully in the next few weeks that will change.
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    @cpk3535 @ninrmsThanks, all. I'm surprised by how much more I can feel her moving in the last few days, even, so I'm sure they pick up steam pretty quickly. I think I need to pay more attention to when she moves, because when you described those patterns I was like... yes. For sure in the morning after breakfast and then for sure after dinner and when I lay down at night. Maybe she's on a schedule and I just hadn't picked up on it yet! As I write this she's moving around a bunch. Maybe there's a midafternoon somersault interlude? @mrszoobear do you ever feel like pregnancy is just waiting for symptoms to emerge and then managing them? It's like when will I feel her move? Then suddenly it's oh wow, how do i hold a conversation with someone when it feels like there are fish in my stomach? You'll feel that kid move consistently really soon. And then you'll have weeks and weeks and weeks of movement! My husband has still only felt her move once or twice. Every time he tries, she freezes. 
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    My baby has periods of movement every day that are physically painful already.  I'm not even 24 weeks!
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    cpk3535cpk3535 member
    edited August 2019
    I might have asked this already, but just curious: Has anybody had any experience going with a natural birth, or plan to try this time?  Last time, I went epidural anesthesia, but I’m curious about going natural this time, but still in a hospital setting (in case we have any complications). 

    Another question:  Has anybody started working on birthing plan notes?  I have a template from the website wellnessmama that I might use for suggestions.  Any ideas?
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    @cpk3535 I do not have any birth experience (FTM), but I did read Emily Oster's Expecting Better, and there's a chapter in there where she lays out what her birth plan was, and I kind of just copied it and tweaked it a bit for myself. Made it super easy. It's just a bullet list, but it's effective. 
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    @cpk3535 i got an epidural with DS, with him being early he had to go right into the nicu so I had to wait till I could walk before I could go see him. If this baby comes early as well I’m going to try and go natural just to avoid the 2hr delay of me getting over to the nicu. As far as birth plan i really only want immediate skin to skin (no cleaning or putting him on a blanket) and delayed cord clamping. Same goals as last time but again couldn’t do due to the nicu stay. 
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    @cpk3535 I tried to go natural last time. And skin-to-skin immediately, delayed cord clamping. 

    I made it to 8cm before demanding an epidural. Well, actually, I wouldn't even let them check me again until after the epidural, but when they did I was at 8cm. I was just so exhausted because I'd been awake for nearly 24 hours by that point. My contractions started at about 10pm, and I was up all night, so it was about 8am by the time I just couldn't anymore. They also weren't able to do delayed cord clamping because there was some concern about his oxygen levels during the birth so they whisked him away to the newborn station so quickly that my husband and midwife didn't even get to see what sex he was  :D

    Given all that, I'm going to attempt natural again. I'm not tied to it though, if I can do it, cool, if I don't feel like I can hack it then I'll get an epidural again. 
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    @cpk3535 I got an epidural with DS and it was the most awful thing for me so I have decided to go as natural as possible this time. I have been looking at different techniques and reading birth stories but plan to go more in depth with my research. I have already told my OB my wishes about birth and explain my reasons why and she is on board as long as everything is fine. I have generic birth plan that I got from the bump when I was pregnant with DS 4 years ago. 
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    ninrmsninrms member
    edited August 2019
    @cpk3535 FTM here. My goal is to go as natural as possible, but I'm not ruling out an epidural if I feel like I need it. Our hospital has nitrous oxide, which I'm hoping to be able to have (apparently it's only available in a few rooms, so it just depends if there's an open room when I get there...), so I guess that's not *totally* natural. :P I've also been working on my birth plan a bit, but haven't too much with it. Followed a template from my hospital's website. I think I'll take a look at Oster's plan, though--thanks, @rjgmcmanus ! :)
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    @ktmaesim I'm with you.  My midwife said my hospital does all these things listed already as a matter of practice.  And as for painkillers,  I'll just see how it progresses.  I mean I might need a scheduled c section for all I know at this point. 
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    Thank you everybody for the insight!  Last time, I felt super unprepared, no plan of any sort, no requests were made, so I know I have a few essentials to ask for this time (like, make sure my husband is in the room at all times).  

    I don’t know what the heck happened last time, but nobody ever pointed me to make any sort of plan.  I don’t want to be too demanding, because I’m very aware that there could be complications, but I don’t want to be worked into the hospital’s schedule either, so if possible I’d like it to be more natural this time.  By the time you’re in labor with no plan, you’re way too far gone to think of any of this stuff, and that can be just as frustrating.  Last time, the hospital didn’t seem to know that we were even a married couple (yet we’re on the same family medical plan, and we were 30 year old adults).  Hence, DH wasn’t in the room (my mother was) when I got my epidural, which I didn’t really have a choice on, they just told me to do it.  Just some weird things I’d like to prep for this time a little better 👍
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    cpk3535 I went natural last time and plan to do it again. A big key for me was having a birth plan in place and advocating for myself loudly (the anesthesiologists tried to bully and scare me into an epidural). Having good support that is on board with your plan is important as well as being prepped with a handful of different comfort techniques at hand. I would encourage taking a class with your partner so they can learn how to do the techniques and you can work through them in advance. Tennis balls, ribozos, a back massager are all great tools to bring with you in your bag.  
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    @ashorkey did you just do the generic class at your hospital? or something more specific like bradley/hypno? my goal is natural, but i'm also realistic that it may not work. trying to figure out how much to "plan" b/c i also know it can take a sharp turn quickly.
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    @Cpk3535 half my body had no epidural with my second.  I wanted to go without, but could tell the on call doctor was not vbac friendly and I was about to get a csection if labor didn’t start soon.  My spinal didn’t work for my semi-natural csection, ha, so I was trying to get an epidural in and working so I could be awake for my child’s birth this time.

    i have full intentions to not get an epidural, I don’t think the minor pain relief I expired was worth the back pain I dealt with after.
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    @anniemarie887 my hospital had a natural birthing class that covered many different types of methods. I realized pretty quickly that hypnobirth and the guided meditations weren’t for me (even though meditation is usually my jam). I couldn’t get on board with the “my body is a flame” or “my body is opening like a flower” I actually put in my plan and told my husband there will be no fire/ flame/ candle talk about my body.

     Knowing your plan may change is important but also knowing that you don’t need an epidural just because the doctor may suggest one or ask if you want one is also important with wanting to go natural. I had in my plan I did not want to be asked for one my daughter started to crash, they got her stable and we had the discussion of one. I opted not to take one still not because I was being stubborn but I had done a lot of research prior and the doctors said the chance of her crashing again were slim without getting one so I made the decision to not still. 
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