1. How do I break through this exhaustion? I can barely make it through the work day and this momma has things to do!
2. So I feel like it would mean a lot to my mom to come to an ultrasound, but I also feel like those appts are few and far between and are ones DH shouldn't miss. Any suggestions on how to balance everything?
1. I just try to constantly drink water and eat snacks throughout the day. Hopefully you start having more energy soon.
2. I think it's up to you. Does your ob's office only allow one guest in the US room or can both your mom and YH come? I wouldn't want anyone other than DH at my US appts, but that's just me. Maybe there's a way to get your mom involved without having her come to an appt?
@nightdreamr13 I had my DH, my mom and my MIL all present at my 20 week anatomy scan with my first. You may want to call ahead & see if they limit how many people can be there, but my scans are always at a specialist, and their offices are spacious and it was no issue having 3 guests with me. I will do that again with this pregnancy, I think it really helped them be involved!
@nightdreamr13 would your mom maybe be open to covering the cost of having an ultrasound at one of those ‘boutique’ places? Then it’s low risk for encountering issues as they’re not testing for anything, and they’re usually super accommodating as to having as many people as you like attend. Plus you usually get a bunch of bonus pics!
@nightdreamr13 if money isn't an issue, you can also go to one of the specialty places to have a "fun" ultrasound where they find out the gender and just let you watch the baby play around and take tons of pictures and videos! You can invite your mom to that (or sometimes basically your entire family can go! Their rooms are usually huge!) Or they will give you a DVD that your mom can watch of the whole thing. I'd say it totally depends on how open you are with your mom in case there are issues too... at the 20 week appt I've had SO many friends be freaked out because the tech couldn't see something or get an accurate measurement on something or might suspect some issue that turned out to be nothing at all, but due to baby's placement it made it stressful. I personally wouldn't want my mother there, because she doesn't tend to calm me down when I'm nervous or anxious, but I know most people have much better relationships with their mothers.
@mainemomma8316 13w4d witrh baby #2 and definitely feeling some movement. Both Saturday and Sunday night when I finally laid down for the night I could feel little baby flutters.
Okay I feel so so badly for this, but does anyone have some minor blues about the baby’s sex? I’m feeling super attached to my little baby boy growing inside of me, and think it’s cool that my son will have a brother, but sometimes I just feel a little crushed that I won’t have a daughter. I want this little baby as he is, and kind of wish for a baby girl after this, but I really don’t think that’s in the cards for us to try again, not to mention it could be another sweetie boy. Overall I’m super happy and grateful, but feeling super guilty. Anyone else in this boat? I’m so much like my dad, and know that a parent/child relationship is not based on the sex of a child. Ugh. Looking to get over this! I feel like a jerk and am nervous even putting this out there!
Hugs, hugs and more hugs @blitzybee!!! There is absolutely nothing wrong with have a little baby sex related blues. When I found out my BFF had a little girl when I was KU with DS (they were Team Green) I was a little bummed because she gets to have the Mother-Daughter relationship I always wanted and I was wading into the unknown with a son. Try to remember that at the end of the day, your two little boys will be BFFs for the rest of their lives! There’s nothing sweeter than a little bro following his big bro/hero around. 🥰
@blitzybee I think it’s completely normal. Funny enough, I have 2 boys and I am slightly disappointed that I am having a girl. I think it stems from my terrible relationship with my mom. So, I am really afraid. I love having boys and I am not sure how the dynamic is going to change with a girl.
Anyway, I just wanted to tell you that some apprehension or disappointment is normal - this is a time in our life where our past experiences come to the forefront: ie if you have a close relationship with your mom, you are going to want that for yourself in the future. Totally normal.
At the end of day, we are both so blessed to be here
@blitzybee no worries, you're not alone. I don't think it makes you any less of a mama or person to have a little regret/wonder what could have been. I was hoping for a boy and was definitely slightly bummed out when our NIPT results showed it's a girl. Like you, I'm still excited and hopeful just to have a healthy baby, but I'd be lying if I said I was 100% ready for a girl.
@rms924 so interesting how you are feeling! I have no relationship with my mom, so I think I imagined having one with a daughter?! At the same time, I was seeing it as a positive to have a very different family from my childhood so I can kind of start fresh! Thanks for your encouragement. I know when I look back, I won’t imagine it any other way because my kids will be so precious to me.
@themadcamel thanks for sharing your honest feelings. Sounds like many of us have something in our head about this whole parenting thing that is switching things upside down for us!
@blitzybee I had this feeling big time with my last pregnancy when I found out it was a boy. I felt so guilty! I was excited for my son to have a brother, but very sad I wouldn't get the daughter I had always dreamed of. I know you will be so happy no matter what and love that little guy with all your heart so don't feel bad at all! It is totally normal to have these feelings.
*TW*
Me: 32 │ DH: 35 Married 8/16/13 BFP#1 DS 11/13/16 BFP# 2 MMC dx @ 13w 10/30/18 BFP# 3 Preemie DD born at 38w (IUGR) on 8/28/19 weighing 5.5lbs. Our little miracle
Any New Yorker moms here? DH and I are going for a weekend getaway this weekend (first time we have left DD for more than one night and gone running to get here at 7am the next day -- she turned 2 last month!) and are staying in Chelsea (Kimpton Eventi, I'm not sure how big Chelsea is!). DH has never been to NY and I've only ever gone for daytrips - see the Christmas tree, etc. Any suggestions on things we should do? I know we want to check out Chelsea Market and weather depending the High Line looks nice. Any favorite restaurants? Obviously the cocktail menu is OUT, so boo on recs there.
@blitzybee Totally normal so don't beat yourself up. I am a little bummed that this LO is a girl bc my FIL passed away unexpectedly 2 weeks ago and we were planning to use his FN as a MN if baby was a boy. There really isnt a good female variation so we don't get to do that now. But then I smile at how much he loved little girls and it makes me feel better.
@mommyshark13 I’m so sorry for your family’s loss. We lost my FIL unexpectedly a few years ago and my SIL had a daughter shortly after. She used his FN as her MN (Lillian Sean). I would encourage you to find a way to incorporate it if it’s meaningful to you!
@kiddiesandkitties Thank you. I'm just glad he knew we were pregnant. We were going to wait until the 2nd trimester but I ended up being so sick that we couldn't. He died the day before the 2nd tri started so I am glad we didnt stick to the plan.
Add me to the gender disappointment club. This is our last and now we'll have 3 girls. I am sad I'll never have a son and experience a little boy, but it is what it is. I have 2 healthy girls and another on the way so I try to remind myself of that. I know at some point I'm going to see a little baby boy and cry.
@supermom34482 JSYK having 3 girls is the best thing ever! I have two sisters and they are my best friends in the entire world. Why would you want to muck that up with a stinky, smelly boy?!?!?!? 😉😘
@lillywonderland okay you are really cracking me up! You’ve got something great up your sleeve for all of us ... oh the boys will be so great... why stink up the place with a boy! 😂😂 You are awesome for everything you are saying.
@supermom34482 It’s so hard when something you’ve always imagined is crushed. So many things in our lives are things we can work towards when we dream it, but this whole baby making thing is so out of our control! I know a few families with 3 girls, and they are pretty awesome. There’s something about the way sisters can hang out throughout their whole lives that is so cool, and I’ve been jealous of!
@themadcamelI’ve always been Team (at least) 2 kids just so they can grow up together and complain about DH and I....and when we’re all on here complaining about how our toddlers had massive regressions/night terrors/potty training mishaps/biting issues when their sibling arrives you might change your tune again!! 😉
@blitzybee I’m the resident optimist! Happy to always put a positive spin on pretty much everything. 🙃😎
@themadcamel I'm like Lilly and team 2 kids, but I think only children can have similar experiences as siblings if you foster relationships with other people close to you. And there is no guarantee that siblings will be close. My dad has a twin and they didn't get along growing up and haven't spoken to each other in years. So you never know!
@lillywonderland@kgg2241@kiddiesandkitties all good points! I'm an only child and DH has a brother, but they're not super close. I mostly liked being an only child, but I did sometimes wish for siblings. There were a lot of kids on my block growing up who were in my age group so I did have a lot of people to play with.
@themadcamel I'm an only child too and honestly have no idea whether I just want to be one and done or have some more. My answer to anyone who asks has always been "ask me after the first" and I'm sticking to it!
@maple3251 I've been caffeine free for more than 2 years (gave it up before TTC DS and haven't gone back as I'm still nursing), but the other day I realllllly wanted coffee. I didn't have any, but it sounds and smells so good for some reason.
Hi all the mamas out there who are nursing a toddler during this pregnancy (or have nursed while pregnant otherwise)! Are any of you experiencing some seriously painful nipples during nursing? Mine hurt like hell when DS latches the first time, but then are fine after a couple of minutes and don't hurt during any of his subsequent latches (he switches sides like 8 times sometimes). Just wondering if it's just me or this is normal. It's the kind of pain that makes my eyes cross for a second. Ouch.
Re: The Great Question Thread!
Married 8/16/13
BFP#1 DS 11/13/16
BFP# 2 MMC dx @ 13w 10/30/18
BFP# 3 Preemie DD born at 38w (IUGR) on 8/28/19 weighing 5.5lbs. Our little miracle
2. So I feel like it would mean a lot to my mom to come to an ultrasound, but I also feel like those appts are few and far between and are ones DH shouldn't miss. Any suggestions on how to balance everything?
Married 05/26/17
STM; DS 9/14/2019
EDD 6/13/2022
1st Baby 5/12/17, Henry
Anyway, I just wanted to tell you that some apprehension or disappointment is normal - this is a time in our life where our past experiences come to the forefront: ie if you have a close relationship with your mom, you are going to want that for yourself in the future. Totally normal.
At the end of day, we are both so blessed to be here
DS: 18 months
Dx DOR AMH .2
<a href="http://www.thebump.com/?utm_source=ticker&utm_medium=HTML&utm_campaign=tickers" title="Pregnancy"><img
@themadcamel thanks for sharing your honest feelings. Sounds like many of us have something in our head about this whole parenting thing that is switching things upside down for us!
Married 8/16/13
BFP#1 DS 11/13/16
BFP# 2 MMC dx @ 13w 10/30/18
BFP# 3 Preemie DD born at 38w (IUGR) on 8/28/19 weighing 5.5lbs. Our little miracle
@supermom34482 It’s so hard when something you’ve always imagined is crushed. So many things in our lives are things we can work towards when we dream it, but this whole baby making thing is so out of our control! I know a few families with 3 girls, and they are pretty awesome. There’s something about the way sisters can hang out throughout their whole lives that is so cool, and I’ve been jealous of!
@blitzybee I’m the resident optimist! Happy to always put a positive spin on pretty much everything. 🙃😎