March 2019 Moms

Facebook/Private Group When&Where

245

Re: Facebook/Private Group When&Where

  • @blueberry0326 I was thinking/ wondering the same thing.

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  • @blueberry0326 I love your idea and totally support it!
  • I was going to suggest the same thing about there being two groups after reading through all the comments. 

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  • I like the idea of two groups! :)
    Me: 30 DH: 31
    Married: 2012
    BFP #1 Sept 2014, MMC Dec 2014 | BFP #2 May 2015, DD Jan 2016 <3 | BFP #3 May 2017, MC July 2017 | BFP #4 Jan 2018, MC Feb 2018 | BFP #5 July 2018, fingers crossed
  • I redact my previous statement about FB. They added ads all into my feed today so I'd be down for a private bump group, but I'm out for FB. 
  • @BuckeyeNut05 there are no adds when you go directly to the group. I mostly don't check the feed at all when I open FB, just visit each group that has unreads and that's it. 
  • letsmakeit5letsmakeit5 member
    edited December 2018
    I voted for FB as I'm on there more and the birth group from April 14 moved to fb and we became much closer after. Also I have problems with this app. I think 2 groups is at least worth a try
  • I also like the idea of 2 groups! 
  • I voted before babies private bump group. I'm not too active on Facebook and pretty close to just deleting my account all together.
    TTC #1 Since May 2011 ~ Everyone Welcome
    Me (34): DOR d/t chemo/radiation, Immature Endometrial Lining, Hypothyroidism
    DH (35): MFI d/t testicular torsion and removal, Low T, Oligospermia, Anti-Sperm Antibodies, Currently on T supplements
    Sept '11-April '13 ~  Testing, failed multiple MFI treatments, saving & TONS of praying
    January 2014 ~ IVF/ICSI & PGS ~ no response to stims ~ converted to IUI ~ BFN
    February 2014 ~ On to donor embyros ~ 5 blasts!!! 
    March 2014 ~ FET #1 ~ Transferred 2 blasts ~ BFN
    July 2014 ~ Kliman's mock cycle with endometrial function test
    Sample too small for EFT, HE slide showed immature cells
    New protocol planned, saving for another biopsy for EFT
    January 2015 ~ Considering adoption options
    April 2015 ~ Privately arranged adoption of planned pregnancy
    DD#1 ~ Lillyana Violet Marie born 6/15/16, Finalized adoption 12/20/16
    July 13, 2018 ~ BFP....WTF?!?!
    7/16 Beta #1 ~ 466...7/18 Beta #2 ~ 1,077...7/23 Beta #3 ~ 5,291
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  • I'm in 2 fb groups that were originally bump bmbs.  July 11 and July 14.  I have no interest in sticking with a private bump board since I already use fb and have enough trouble keeping up there.  The bump app leaves a lot to be desired and I hate having to hunt down any notifications.  My j14 board had a serious catfish and I dislike the anonymity the bump allows that let that happen so easily.



  • I'm in a PAIF board on FB from the bump. The only confusion I have with FB is that I have to remember and keep looking up who is who since I'm so used to everyone's bump names. 
    TTC #1 since April 2015
    June 2016 - CP
    2017 - Medicated Cycles & IUI's
    IVF w/ PGS  - January 2018
    FET #1 - April 2018 - BFN
    ERA Cycle May / June 2018
    ERA Biopsy June 2018 ~ Results: receptive (no change)
    FET #2 - July 2018 - BFP <3 Beta #1 - 137 Beta #2 - 410
    U/S #1 7wk1d - HB 144 U/S #2 9w1d HB 166
    Anatomy Scan 1st 11/2/18 2nd AS 11/19
    EDD March 28, 2019
    Baby Girl born 3/26/19  <3



  • @Pooka8 I have some J17 friends who were also in your infamous BMB! I’ve heard tales of the catfish!

  • So here’s the results of our poll. Should we nominate moderators for fb/private group? I’d say we want an odd number of mods so if there’s any internal issues there can be no tie if it comes down to a decision of some kind. Looks like a total of 50 people voted, so maybe 3-5 mods?
    DD1: June '16 DD2: March ‘19 :::: Married since 2011 :::: USN Wife ::::
  • Kenneylynn3Kenneylynn3 member
    edited January 2019
    So are we nominating mods on here? I guess that would also depend on which group we went with if those people even would want to be a part of that FB/ private group. I agree with odd number of mods.

    Edit: tired brain.

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  • So here's what Feb '19 did. https://forums.thebump.com/discussion/12738959/private-group-facebook-info-thread#latest

    Looks like they moved to a private group on the bump, gave it a month or so to get better acquainted and then migrated again to FB.

    Mostly I'm just looking for us to figure out what the next step is since we pretty unanimously voted to move before babies.
    DD1: June '16 DD2: March ‘19 :::: Married since 2011 :::: USN Wife ::::
  • Agree on an odd # of mods & maybe nominating here?
    I'm honestly game for whatever platform works best. Do like Febs idea of doing a private group and then a FB group once everyone is feeling pretty comfortable.
  • I agree with the odd # of mods and nominating mods here. I like how feb did it, a month at least getting more comfortable in a private environment and we can switch to Facebook if/when we feel comfortable. 
    *TW*
    Me: 38 DH: 41
    Married: 2016
    BFP #1 4/23/18, blighted ovum 5/29/18
    BFP#2 7/14/18, DS 4/5/19
  • Any suggestions for how we should determine regulars? Leave it to the mods to decide, expect a certain number of posts/frequency?
    DD1: June '16 DD2: March ‘19 :::: Married since 2011 :::: USN Wife ::::
  • I would leave it up to the mods. Don't want too many cooks in the kitchen, if that makes sense.

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  • I am bump illiterate, like I hate the platform so much!! There are ads everywhere and it logs me out all the time and I don’t get tag notifications so I can’t even follow conversations. I strongly recommend a Facebook group so I can actually connect with you ladies
  • I think odd number of mods is a good idea and agree also with starting as a private bump group first, then moving over. I think doing it that way might keep people active in our public group for longer because we aren't switching platforms yet.
  • Thanks for bringing this into focus again, I was actually starting to wonder if we'll move in time before babies :smile: Backing up the idea of an odd number of mods! 
  • I like what Feb group did too! I've migrated to the PAIF group on facebook. It's mainly baby pic posts and honestly for me it's hard trying to put the bump name with their real names. I wish there was a way to do that lol I'll probably join both but mainly stick on here til I get your faces down  :D
    TTC #1 since April 2015
    June 2016 - CP
    2017 - Medicated Cycles & IUI's
    IVF w/ PGS  - January 2018
    FET #1 - April 2018 - BFN
    ERA Cycle May / June 2018
    ERA Biopsy June 2018 ~ Results: receptive (no change)
    FET #2 - July 2018 - BFP <3 Beta #1 - 137 Beta #2 - 410
    U/S #1 7wk1d - HB 144 U/S #2 9w1d HB 166
    Anatomy Scan 1st 11/2/18 2nd AS 11/19
    EDD March 28, 2019
    Baby Girl born 3/26/19  <3



  • Agree with the odd number of mods. I also think starting on the bump and moving to FB is a good compromise. I voted for FB but I’d be okay with continuing on this platform in the form of a private group to start.
  • I like the way Feb did it and vote for odd # of mods who can also act as gatekeepers, so to speak.
  • I agree with the idea of having the private Bump group and then moving to Facebook. 
  • As far as keeping track of who’s who on facebook, we could always make an unofficial rule that we start each post with your bump name in parentheses. Kind of annoying but we’d probably only need to do it for a little while. 
    Me: 30 DH: 31
    Married: 2012
    BFP #1 Sept 2014, MMC Dec 2014 | BFP #2 May 2015, DD Jan 2016 <3 | BFP #3 May 2017, MC July 2017 | BFP #4 Jan 2018, MC Feb 2018 | BFP #5 July 2018, fingers crossed
  • @Pooka8 I have some J17 friends who were also in your infamous BMB! I’ve heard tales of the catfish!
    @swanbrooner
    Now I'm curious who :)  Which J month are you referring to.



  • I’m sorry but I’m not a fan of this plan. I don’t like that the mods will get to say who gets to come by their own determination, and that will also limit access to the Facebook group they may not want to be part of. Folks who like Facebook and want to stay in contact... feel free to send me a DM, and I will just add you like a normal person. I’m not likely to stay active after the transition.
    the bump ap for me is still a disaster, I can’t see some of the posts now because the ads are superimposed over screen names, etc.

    [spoiler=TW in signature]

    Me: 36, DH 37.

    August 2014- 6w MMC

    July 2015- CP

    PCOS, plus some medical issues that make me high risk.

    Our rainbow babies are due 3/21!!!!!

    [/spoiler]

  • I don't have a Facebook and I'd like to stay connected, hence my vote for the bump group. Are we still considering dividing up into both Facebook and bump, depending on preferences? 
  • @abbykwail I feel like if we started on the Bump and moved to Facebook, some may just choose to stay on the Bump and not move over.
  • @3rdtime_charmed so do you think that we should start both simultaneously? Or do you have a suggestion for some sort of determining factor for how people should be accepted to the private group?

    Personally I use both the bump and facebook so I will probably try to participate in both. It doesn't much matter to me if they both start simultaneously or if a private FB group is created from a private bump group. The way Feb did it seems to have been a smooth transition and would give a private place on the bump to share private information, like how to find each other on facebook. Otherwise you have to post private info on a public board or the mods would be bombarded with PM's trying to get everyone's info. If there's going to be a private group anyway, it seems to me like the way to go.
    DD1: June '16 DD2: March ‘19 :::: Married since 2011 :::: USN Wife ::::
  • I’m sorry but I’m not a fan of this plan. I don’t like that the mods will get to say who gets to come by their own determination, and that will also limit access to the Facebook group they may not want to be part of. Folks who like Facebook and want to stay in contact... feel free to send me a DM, and I will just add you like a normal person. I’m not likely to stay active after the transition.
    the bump ap for me is still a disaster, I can’t see some of the posts now because the ads are superimposed over screen names, etc.

    But this is exactly the same way FB groups work. Either way, there are people determining who is in and who is not. And either way, people can point out "where's so and so," and I think it'll come out pretty quickly if a mod is not accepting someone because of their own personal dislike.

    I prefer the group or just staying here intil after the babies are born. I'm not moving to FB, so I'd obviously like to see us stay in a place where I and other non-FBers will be able to participate. 
  • I agree with @navete . There needs to be some way to determine who can join a private group. I think having three or five moderators is the only way to do it. I’d also like it if there were another way besides “gatekeepers” to determine members, but I have no other ideas.
  • @mayoduck Great idea! 
    TTC #1 since April 2015
    June 2016 - CP
    2017 - Medicated Cycles & IUI's
    IVF w/ PGS  - January 2018
    FET #1 - April 2018 - BFN
    ERA Cycle May / June 2018
    ERA Biopsy June 2018 ~ Results: receptive (no change)
    FET #2 - July 2018 - BFP <3 Beta #1 - 137 Beta #2 - 410
    U/S #1 7wk1d - HB 144 U/S #2 9w1d HB 166
    Anatomy Scan 1st 11/2/18 2nd AS 11/19
    EDD March 28, 2019
    Baby Girl born 3/26/19  <3



  • I agree that it keeps the process very democratic. So if there were 50 votes on the original group poll, what seems like an appropriate number of “votes” for acceptance?
    DD1: June '16 DD2: March ‘19 :::: Married since 2011 :::: USN Wife ::::
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