Facebook/Private Group When&Where - Page 3 — The Bump
March 2019 Moms

Facebook/Private Group When&Where

135

Re: Facebook/Private Group When&Where

  • edited January 9
    @mayoduck I think that’s a great idea. Personally, I think 5 votes would be enough.
  • @mayoduck super clever !!
  • @chocolatelemons I agree, I don't think the number needs to be very high.
  • gowencgowenc
    500 Love Its Third Anniversary 100 Comments Name Dropper
    member
    I don't know, I feel like I'm a fairly regular reader/commenter, particularly in the weekly thread, but 50 votes seems like a lot. I certainly can't think of 50 March 2019 screen names off the top of my head.  Maybe 25 would be more realistic?
  • LbloomLbloom
    Long-Lasting Membership 500 Love Its 500 Comments Name Dropper
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    Ugh, I'm sorry everyone, I realize "gatekeepers" isn't the right word, and I used it first, so my bad. My head is so full right now into Nicu life that I wrote down the year 2017 on my 5am pumped bottle of milk this morning. The nurse brought it over and had a good giggle at me, but yeah, I have no idea what's going on half the time. I'm also a newb on the whole private group transition thing, having missed it with my other kids, but I'm really excited about it because this group is amazing. I'm up for whatever the group decides. 
    mayoduckLoboandSuperNinja
  • @gowenc I just meant that we can probably expect 50 people or less in our collective groups because we got 50 votes on the before/after FB/Bump poll at the beginning of this thread.
    ME: 32  DH: 32 DD1: June '16 DD2: March ‘19 :::: Married since 2011 :::: USN Wife ::::
  • gowencgowenc
    500 Love Its Third Anniversary 100 Comments Name Dropper
    member
    @ahhhh got it. Sorry for the confusion!
  • gowencgowenc
    500 Love Its Third Anniversary 100 Comments Name Dropper
    member
    In my other BMB one of the moms took charge of the transition to facebook. If she didn't immediately recognize someone who requested to join she put it out to the group, and if at least a handful of people did recognize them they were in. I think if we have a group of 3-5 mods they can probably identify who's who.
    mihaelams1thedaint87swanbrooner
  • Sounds like a good plan to me! I think five is a good number. And agree to move to a private board, then decide if we want to FB transition at some point. 
  • I think we should split simultaneously to make it the most fair to those that don’t want to go to a private bump group. It would be worth it to me to sort through all the DMs to continue to allow for participation of more than just a few regulars. Other BMBs have done it that way. 
    But I am clearly in the minority, and I’m feeling super irritable so I’m not interested in engaging in the topic further. There is no way a group of people of this size are going to all agree.

    Me: 36, DH 37.

    August 2014- 6w MMC

    July 2015- CP

    PCOS, plus some medical issues that make me high risk.

    Our rainbow babies are due 3/21!!!!!

  • I think what @mayoduck proposed is fair, makes sense, and balances the concerns people have raised regarding privacy with still hopefully allowing/encouraging semi-regulars to participate.

    I’m a FTM and new to all this so defer to STM+ re process and timing. When do y’all anticipate the transition will occur? As an aside, I checked my registry this evening and was reminded that my due date is only 66 days away - so crazy! 
  • This will be my first time trying to transition to a private board (my previous pregnancies went right to facebook and, since I'm not a facebook user, I was left in the dust), but I think the idea of "voting up" moderators and transitioning sooner rather than later is a good one.
  • I’m with the majority here. I’m easy on what platform we move to since I use both but I agree that I like the idea of a private bump group first to be able to reveal more about ourselves and share more comfortably, and then move to Facebook later since Facebook is a bit more personal. I like the idea of an odd number of mods and of 5-10 “votes” for people who want to make the transition! Or, if the mods want to add who they recognize and out other less known names out to the private group to vouch for, that works for me too!
    bdesterhouse
  • Can someone be part of both?

    We have two sleeping beauties in heaven.
    Jack gained his wings on 09/02/2016. 
    Kali gained her wings on 07/28/2015.
    They will be forever missed. <3
       Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
    LoboandSuperNinja
  • swanbroonerswanbrooner
    1000 Comments 500 Love Its Second Anniversary Name Dropper
    member
    edited January 10
    I think we looked at activity/contribution and set a guideline for the admins to go by as the gatekeeper for the J17 Facebook group. 
    kristimh80lelkcotBuckeyeNut05
  • I am bump illiterate, like I hate the platform so much!! There are ads everywhere and it logs me out all the time and I don’t get tag notifications so I can’t even follow conversations. I strongly recommend a Facebook group so I can actually connect with you ladies
    This is how I feel.  I vote before babies/Facebook.  
    Pregnancy Ticker
    mamakate1616
  • So, when is this all going down? End of January, maybe? 
  • Well, we’d need to pick our mods. Then we can start the loveit vote system if that’s the way we want to do it. Then the mods can open a private group and start sending/accepting members. Whether the fb group opens at the same time or after a little bit in the PG depends on everyone’s preference.
    ME: 32  DH: 32 DD1: June '16 DD2: March ‘19 :::: Married since 2011 :::: USN Wife ::::
    lelkcot
  • Also, for anyone who is going the FB route, we have really only have a few simple guidelines in our J17 group, that have worked well for us. It’s  probably a good idea to have some in place BEFORE issues arise, not after. All of our “rules” were an afterthought.

    1) Semi-regular participation is necessary to remain within the group.

    I copied and pasted the verbiage about participation right from our group:

    In regards to activity.  Please note the line that states we will ONLY look at activity if there is a concern. 

    The level of activity considered active is 8 posts/month – including comments and separate posts.  Activity will only be looked at if there is a concern.  If you are concerned about another member’s activity, please PM that member or an admin who will do so.
     
    o The process for alerting a member their activity is below 8 posts/month, and has been inquired about is as follows:
     
    ▪ 1. PM to the member
     
    ▪ 2. Public post on J17, with member tagged
     
    • A public post will read: “Hello (name)!  We want to reach out to you to see how things are.  As we discussed via PM, there are some concerns about your participation.  We want to make sure all is well, and that you want to be a part of our group. –J17 Admins”
     
    ▪ 3. Removal from J17, with group informed
     
    ▪ There will be one month’s time between each “step” of the process, to allow for an increase in participation.

    The other ones I’m just sort of paraphrasing..

    2) You have to alert a mod if you plan on taking a break from the group or deactivating Facebook. If you hair flip over a debate and leave the group, you most likely won’t be allowed back in. 

    3) No drama on other members’ personal pages. If you don’t like what they are posting, don’t be friends with them. This is grounds for dismissal.

    4) Mods can turn off comments or delete comments if anything gets nasty. (This has literally happened once.)

    mayoduckLoboandSuperNinja
  • If you hair flip over a debate and leave the group, you most likely won’t be allowed back in. 
    Lol!
  • @mayoduck We are usually so tame, but there have been a few GBCFB moments!

    The most memorable ones were a very heated discussions about “cry it out” when the babies were less than 3 months, a sanctimommy scolding others for lying to their kids, and voter ID laws. Oh, and there was one girl who was just an AW and insufferable brat who got called out for it and wasn’t pleased! 
  • @meggyme My vote is for you too! You've been wonderful at getting this board going and very active. Maybe best to have different admins for here and FB, since it seems split who prefers to go where. Then would be a whole lot easier to maintain. 
    TTC #1 since April 2015
    June 2016 - CP
    2017 - Medicated Cycles & IUI's
    IVF w/ PGS  - January 2018
    FET #1 - April 2018 - BFN
    ERA Cycle May / June 2018
    ERA Biopsy June 2018 ~ Results: receptive (no change)
    FET #2 - July 2018 - BFP <3 Beta #1 - 137 Beta #2 - 410
    U/S #1 7wk1d - HB 144 U/S #2 9w1d HB 166
    Anatomy Scan 1st 11/2/18 2nd AS 11/19
    EDD March 28, 2019
    Baby Girl born 3/26/19  <3



    beachbaby0523
  • Maybe @swanbrooner and @3rdtime_charmed for FB mods? I’m not sure if @3rdtime_charmed already has one started since she offered to make it a little while back 
    Me: 30 DH: 31
    Married: 2012
    BFP #1 Sept 2014, MMC Dec 2014 | BFP #2 May 2015, DD Jan 2016 <3 | BFP #3 May 2017, MC July 2017 | BFP #4 Jan 2018, MC Feb 2018 | BFP #5 July 2018, fingers crossed
    Kenneylynn3sejica
  • I think we should still stick with an odd number of mods
  • @mamakate1616 I'm not sure 3rdtime_charmed would be up for it right now. She posted the other day she was taking a break for a moment as she's going thru a little rough patch. Hopefully she does come back soon and joins us :smile:
    TTC #1 since April 2015
    June 2016 - CP
    2017 - Medicated Cycles & IUI's
    IVF w/ PGS  - January 2018
    FET #1 - April 2018 - BFN
    ERA Cycle May / June 2018
    ERA Biopsy June 2018 ~ Results: receptive (no change)
    FET #2 - July 2018 - BFP <3 Beta #1 - 137 Beta #2 - 410
    U/S #1 7wk1d - HB 144 U/S #2 9w1d HB 166
    Anatomy Scan 1st 11/2/18 2nd AS 11/19
    EDD March 28, 2019
    Baby Girl born 3/26/19  <3



    mamakate1616
  • Oh no! I missed that one. Here I thought I was keeping up with everyone’s posts! 
    Me: 30 DH: 31
    Married: 2012
    BFP #1 Sept 2014, MMC Dec 2014 | BFP #2 May 2015, DD Jan 2016 <3 | BFP #3 May 2017, MC July 2017 | BFP #4 Jan 2018, MC Feb 2018 | BFP #5 July 2018, fingers crossed
  • Definitely vote for @meggyme and @swanbrooner as mods (and @3rdtime_charmed when/if she’s feeling up for it).
    kristimh80navetedtspmamabeachbaby0523
  • I'm good with the suggestions for mods. I know I'm not a 'regular,' but it's because I'm mostly mobile and my app is the worst. It's a lot easier for me to participate in FB groups. I still talk to about 15 girls from D15 every single day. I will be sad if I can't be a part of this group wherever it moves, but I'll understand if that's how you guys want to play it since I haven't been participating as much as most of the ladies in here. I loved having the community to talk to and ask for advice when DS was born; I think it's really helpful to have a group of people also dealing with the newborn stage and sleeping/ feeding issues. 


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    kristimh80beachbaby0523lisee923LoboandSuperNinja
  • swanbroonerswanbrooner
    1000 Comments 500 Love Its Second Anniversary Name Dropper
    member
    edited January 13
    If we do kind of just open it up to anyone who has posted here occasionally and doesn’t send off red flags though, I think some kind of posting minimum would be necessary for the same reasons @meggyme said. It doesn’t mean they’d have to automatically get the axe, but there is no reason to keep a bunch of inactive members or lurkers.
    mamakate1616lelkcotkristimh80
  • I agree with @meggyme and @swanbrooner . I don't want to make it hard for people to join and obviously we all have lives and things come up and you need to take a social media break or what have you but it's not really fair to have a bunch of people lurking, taking in information but never giving anything back.
    lelkcotdtspmamakristimh80Kenneylynn3
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