I’d be happy to help - but also get that I might not have participated enough. I’m just no longer working until LO is here so I have some extra time on my hands!
TTC #1 February '18 Team Green turned TeamBlue 10/15/18
TTC #2 January '21 BFP June '21 MMC/Blighted Ovum that led to D&C July '21 Jan '22 - started IF testing BFP Jan '22 MMC/Blighted Ovum that led to D&C Feb '22 BFP May '22
Eta: feel free to disregard if this now turns into too many admin lmao
BFP 3/21/2020! OMG We're having TWINS! 4/17/2020 -------------------------------- LO arrived 11/9/2018! We have a baby! -------------------------------- Me: 33 | DH: 41 Married: March 2016 TTC #1/IUD out January 2017 PCOS dx January 2018 Medicated cycle 2.5mg Letrozole CD3-7 February 2018 BFP 3/10/2018! -------------------------------
TTGP December Siggy Co-Winner: Favorite Moments from Holiday Movies/TV
I am willing to help admin too. I'm on facebook an embarrassing amount. Also, my Aug '16 group is super close and small. There are 50 of us in our fb group now. Here are some of the things we did that have worked well and continue to work:
-For admission initially into the group, the admins set it up. Then they took requests to join via PM on the bump. It was a slow build process over the next few days because we had an "admission test." Basically, once you messaged the admins on the bump, the admin would share that person's bump screen name in the facebook group. If three other people in the FB group could vouch for that poster, then they were admitted. Vouching simply meant their screen name was a familiar one and they had been a frequent poster on at least some of the daily threads on the bump. Obviously some screen names were recognized faster than others based on who was in, but we felt like it did a good job weeding out the "lurkers" while also allowing us to capture people who only felt comfortable posting on certain threads (ticker change check-in, PGAL, etc).
-After the group was built, we have a monthly check-in rule. Every month the admins can check to see who hasn't posted or commented in a month on facebook. If you haven't been active, you are removed from the group unless their is an extenuating circumstance. That keeps everyone feeling secure that the group isn't being used for lurkers or catfish.
-We have very few rules in ours. We are all adults who understand we are there to share and help one another. We tend to avoid discussions around politics and things that can be divisive, although they do come up from time to time and everyone responds to each other in a respectful fashion.
I hope that all makes sense and sorry for the novel!
I like the idea of an odd number - so either 3 or 5. Doesn't really matter to me exactly who it is - I recognize all of the names. I can get this thing tactically set up on FB today if we want.
I don’t mind being an admin, BUT, I’m always mobile, so if I have to vet and add people, it’s going to probably be a little slower, since some days I’m able to take more time during the day than other days. If people will be patient, ha, I really don’t mind.
I’m also on FB a lot, so once we are there, I have no problem at all.
@wannaflickone that sounds like a good process. I also like the idea that some of our admins actually having experience because I’m sure you know what has worked and what has turned out to be problematic.
@KellyT22 I would not be opposed to get the ball rolling and setting up a FB group as soon as possible. Thanks for stepping up.
@BabyBoyH92016 I'll get it up on my lunch break in a little bit.
Do the ladies who really want to admin want to PM me their email addresses? I'll add you to the group. We can quick regroup on all of the vetting ideas, then repost the criteria ideas here for feedback.
Also happy to help admin, but I’m getting induced in 3 weeks, so if you need me, then we need to get a jump on soon. If we’re all set with enough admins already, awesome! Let us know what you need us to do next and who to message.
I'm a STM but when I was a FTM, I totally forgot about the bump until I was like 6 or 7 months pregnant so I hadn't posted much. I believe we had to PM the creator of the FB group with our email address used on FB and then an invite was sent. Even after 4 years on my other FB group we still kick people out for not participating. I've tried to be more active on here than I was for DD but I still prefer FB. Unfortunately I won't be able to help admin though.
I feel like I've been kind middle of the road here in terms of participation. Part of that is due to dh having been gone literally since this baby was conceived and having a ton on my plate (not saying everyone else hasn't) and due to my feeling like I can't really post all that much regarding myself and my family due to the fact that this is a public forum. For instance when dd was born I used her middle name when I announced her birth because the uniqueness of her name along with other information shared with her bmb would give anyone in google land enough info to potentially harm my family. Once I got onto facebook and got to know my bmb in a more private setting I was able to share more about myself and my family and be more active. I feel I have checked in and taken some part in conversations around here and would love to be invited to move over to fb and grow relationships but I would completely understand if I didn't receive an invite (although I'd be disappointed).
I'm late to this, but I definitely agree with @offtoneverland and @runningyogimama and some others. I don't want lurkers in the facebook group. I don't want random people to know my full name and see my pictures, etc. I agree, the mobile app sucks but if you really wanted to get to know the people here you'd put some effort into it. My N14 bmb did a big VERY open facebook group and then a smaller facebook group with the regular posters. I know some people joined both, I never joined the big one because I wasn't comfortable with it. I was not an admin, but we had 5. I think they added the first x amount of people to the group that they all agreed were regular posters and after that the group voted on people that wanted to join. If there was even one no that person didn't get added. I'm not saying that's right or wrong, just sharing how our N14 group went. We also had check ins so if people didn't post for a month and didn't respond to being tagged/people checking on them they were removed from the group.
I feel like we're a quieter board so it's pretty obvious who the recognizable posters are. As long as we only allow people who regularly participated on the bump, I'm game for facebook.
*TW*
Me:35 DH:35 Dx: PCOS DS1 born 11/2014 DS2 born 11/2018 3 previous losses Rainbow babydue 12/2021 - Team Green
@mockingjay1 Thankfully I think we'll avoid a huge mega group. I agree that this seems like a smaller board and don't think anyone wants a mega group. General consensus seems to be small, closer group, without lurkers, and the ability to manage weirdos and lurkers.
I am on the lower participation side, probably.... a lot of the time I just didn't have anything new to contribute or the time to start the weekly threads when the designated person didn't (and the app is terrible ). Compared to my last BMB, this one was definitely quieter... but I was able to stick around until "the end" despite a bit of a lull.
I would hope that's enough to still make it into the FB group... the lean towards only super active folks is a little disappointing, even if understandable. If someone doesn't qualify initially, will this BMB board or a private TB board end up active enough to admit new people to the FB group later? That would be my only concern... if I don't qualify now, how do I go about qualifying in the future? Or, does one just miss out?
Just throwing in my own 2 cents... I'm all for a fb group. It's definitely easier for me since I check fb daily. I agree. There needs to be some type of limit set as fat as who to invite, but since I've had a decline in my own participation on TB recently, I'll go along with whatever the majority thinks is right.
@wannaflickone I love all the things you mentioned your last BMB did when moving to FB. Sounds like a great idea to me and a good way to make sure the group stays safe.
@purelex I recognize you as a regular poster and I’m sure others do too. However you do bring up a good point about future qualification for the group. By the way, I feel super weird using the term “future qualification”, but I know a system is warranted.
I believe after we had our initial switch to FB in my last group, we added a few latecomers by vote from the members. We can either do something like that and/or let the admins decide when a cutoff point should be for future admission. Up to a certain point, it probably makes sense to add people who just aren’t comfortable switching yet or who maybe had a a rough go of it for awhile but are active again, but I feel like it would be weird to add someone 4 months down the road. Bonding happens so much faster (IMO) on fb because we see real names and faces, pictures of families are shared, etc.
@purelex I recognize you as a regular poster and I’m sure others do too. However you do bring up a good point about future qualification for the group. By the way, I feel super weird using the term “future qualification”, but I know a system is warranted.
I believe after we had our initial switch to FB in my last group, we added a few latecomers by vote from the members. We can either do something like that and/or let the admins decide when a cutoff point should be for future admission. Up to a certain point, it probably makes sense to add people who just aren’t comfortable switching yet or who maybe had a a rough go of it for awhile but are active again, but I feel like it would be weird to add someone 4 months down the road. Bonding happens so much faster (IMO) on fb because we see real names and faces, pictures of families are shared, etc.
I 100% agree with all this!
*TW*
Me:35 DH:35 Dx: PCOS DS1 born 11/2014 DS2 born 11/2018 3 previous losses Rainbow babydue 12/2021 - Team Green
I am also willing to help admin, but it looks like we have plenty! I'm on FB way more than here, so let me know if I can help.
For those that are having a hard time with the app, I've found that if I just go through Google on my phone, the website works relatively the same, but functions easier. Still having the love tit permission issue, but the loading and ability to stay logged in, is so so much better!!
So, just going to throw my two cents in here because my BMB June12 board's Facebook page was so full of craziness, drama, and shade. I don't think this group will be like that because the BMB was already that way before the page was even created. With that said, I was personally attacked and insulted on that page and it really hurt because you think you have made real connections. I would hate for something like that to happen on this page, but again, I really don't think it will. You do need very strong admins that will not be swayed by friendships (issue in the last board) and some rules on what will and will not be allowed. It is great to say "be respectful" but when the hits rudder the road nothing was done.
Also, I will admit since school started I am far less active. I am busy all day and most if the night and the bump app is just hard to navigate and post too. I am much more inclined to be able to scroll through Facebook when I have a free moment. I miss being on here as much as I was and seeing how all you ladies are!! I am really excited for a Facebook group to start.
@bfpafter4years I think basic rules are a good idea. I'm not good at writing rules so bear with me...but things like no name calling/cursing at other people/being really rude (hard to distinguish from snark sometimes but that could be at the discretion of the admins), maybe no political posts (since those tend to get so heated) etc. If you post the rules up front then the admins can vote if someone breaks the rules and decide if they want to complete ban them or give them a warning. I agree that it likely won't happen with this group because we all seem to be rather chill and respectful but you never know. It's not a bad idea to have a plan in place.
Two Furbabies: Mika (american eskimo) and Gypsy (wire-haired terrier, dachshund mix)
Twins: Kaiden and Zara born 10/2018 conceived after 6 years of infertility via a medicated IUI
@bfpafter4years same. My previous bmb group was very intense and we broke into cliques very quickly on here. Several fb groups were created and I was in a couple. Eventually sh*t hit the fan in one of them and I was out. It was extremely hurtful, I truly felt they were my friends, I learned a lot from the experience. But it was evident even during pregnsncy that there was just a lot of drama and snark. The one I’m still in is very small, only 10 of us, but we are super close and personal. So far in this group I think we’ve all been kind and respectful, but also we haven’t really gotten that personal or into many controversial topics.
@firsttimespartanmom@BabyBoyH92016@KellyT22 I love the idea of a facebook group and would be happy to help admin if needed! I will be a FTM and probably have no idea what I'm doing on that end, but that will leave me with a lot of time to facebook Never admin'ed a group before but I'm sure I can figure it out. I love the Bump and our community but do find that, as often as I look in the group I don't post that much as I don't find it that user friendly. I think facebook would be way easier and have friends who are in FB groups from their bump months and find people are more active on it.
My old bump board was horrible, nasty and full of mean girls. I never posted there and would never even dream of wanting to be in a facebook group with those people. Pretty sure all the nice normal people (like myself) were too scared/disgusted to even post anything....
This group feels so completely different. I don't post a ton and I am iffy on the whole facebook thing anyway. Like I've posted maybe 1 picture of my son on my own page to date and he's 19 months old! I also have a very unique name. I am just super torn but I would like to maybe consider it if I met the agreed upon criteria....
@bfpafter4years I totally agree on the bump being hard to navigate. I get lost in the comments and it's difficult (and annoying, when I'm so wiped at the end of my day) to remember people's usernames when I want to reply to their post (then scroll through continuously to find it again, or go back where I was to keep reading). Definitely not the biggest deal in the world, I just find FB a million times easier to use.
Hi ladies! Just to update you, I think we have enough admins, but if anyone has a huge burning desire and will feel sad if they don’t do it, shoot me a PM.
We’ve been working on some rules for the group to maintain a positive environment, deciding how to address people if they become inactive in the group.
We’re also discussing criteria to add people to the group. After we get everything organized, we’ll open things up to adding people.
Thank you all for your input here! We’re taking the feedback to heart trying to make the best group for everyone!
The official November 2018 BMB Facebook group is ready!
The guidelines for being added to the (secret and private) Facebook group are as follows:
- Must be an active member of the November 2018 BMB (FB admins will discuss and/or vote on any gray areas).
- Must not have been reported for SPAM or abuse on the November BMB.
- You must have been active on the November 18 BMB in the last month on a thread other than this Facebook discussion.
- If you create a FB account to join the group, you must use your real name to ensure fairness and group security, but are welcome to add "November" to your last name i.e. Jane Smithnovember".
To be added to the group, please PM the email address associated with your Facebook account to the admin who is handling the part of the alphabet associated with the first letter of your Bump name (I.e. Aaa15girl should PM me because her bump name starts with A):
- You must have been active on the November 18 BMB in the last month on a thread other than this Facebook discussion.
Also, does this mean just like one post on one thread during the month of September? Is that really considered active? What's to stop lurkers from posting on some other thread today just to get added to the FB group? I'm not trying to be a complainer, but I feel that there needs to be a better definition for "active." I'm not sure I'm comfortable joining the group if one just needs to post one time in one thread in one month. We'd be letting anyone in which isn't really safe. Sorry, I don't mean to be the activity police, but this concerns me. Am I the only one? ETA: oh, I guess this rule is taken in conjunction with the rule about being an active member of the bmb? So it doesn't just go off of one post in the last month being the definition of active?
@offtoneverland One post a month is definitely not “active,” but we felt assigning a specific number was hard to do and also might hurt someone who had one month they weren’t as active but had been overall active - it’s definitely a number of posts in most months.
Re: Facebook Group
Married 10/28/17
Our TTC Journey
Team Green turned Team Blue 10/15/18
TTC #2 January '21
BFP June '21
MMC/Blighted Ovum that led to D&C July '21
Jan '22 - started IF testing
BFP Jan '22
MMC/Blighted Ovum that led to D&C Feb '22
BFP May '22
Eta: feel free to disregard if this now turns into too many admin lmao
--------------------------------
LO arrived 11/9/2018! We have a baby!
--------------------------------
Me: 33 | DH: 41
Married: March 2016
TTC #1/IUD out January 2017
PCOS dx January 2018
Medicated cycle 2.5mg Letrozole CD3-7 February 2018
BFP 3/10/2018!
-------------------------------
-For admission initially into the group, the admins set it up. Then they took requests to join via PM on the bump. It was a slow build process over the next few days because we had an "admission test." Basically, once you messaged the admins on the bump, the admin would share that person's bump screen name in the facebook group. If three other people in the FB group could vouch for that poster, then they were admitted. Vouching simply meant their screen name was a familiar one and they had been a frequent poster on at least some of the daily threads on the bump. Obviously some screen names were recognized faster than others based on who was in, but we felt like it did a good job weeding out the "lurkers" while also allowing us to capture people who only felt comfortable posting on certain threads (ticker change check-in, PGAL, etc).
-After the group was built, we have a monthly check-in rule. Every month the admins can check to see who hasn't posted or commented in a month on facebook. If you haven't been active, you are removed from the group unless their is an extenuating circumstance. That keeps everyone feeling secure that the group isn't being used for lurkers or catfish.
-We have very few rules in ours. We are all adults who understand we are there to share and help one another. We tend to avoid discussions around politics and things that can be divisive, although they do come up from time to time and everyone responds to each other in a respectful fashion.
I hope that all makes sense and sorry for the novel!
I’m also on FB a lot, so once we are there, I have no problem at all.
@KellyT22 I would not be opposed to get the ball rolling and setting up a FB group as soon as possible. Thanks for stepping up.
Do the ladies who really want to admin want to PM me their email addresses? I'll add you to the group. We can quick regroup on all of the vetting ideas, then repost the criteria ideas here for feedback.
Im happy to help admin (but it seems like we have a lot already) but add me as a backup as needed.
I feel like we're a quieter board so it's pretty obvious who the recognizable posters are. As long as we only allow people who regularly participated on the bump, I'm game for facebook.
Dx: PCOS
DS1 born 11/2014
DS2 born 11/2018
3 previous losses
Rainbow baby due 12/2021 - Team Green
@KellyT22 do you feel like you have enough admins yet? I am still totally willing to help if not.
I would hope that's enough to still make it into the FB group... the lean towards only super active folks is a little disappointing, even if understandable. If someone doesn't qualify initially, will this BMB board or a private TB board end up active enough to admit new people to the FB group later? That would be my only concern... if I don't qualify now, how do I go about qualifying in the future? Or, does one just miss out?
DD1: 8/2014
TTC #2: 6/2017
BFP 8/3/2017 | CP 8/4
BFP 10/16/2017 | CP 10/21
BFP 12/18/2017 | CP 12/28
BFP 2/15/2018 | EDD: November 2nd | It's a girl!
DD2: 10/2018
I believe after we had our initial switch to FB in my last group, we added a few latecomers by vote from the members. We can either do something like that and/or let the admins decide when a cutoff point should be for future admission. Up to a certain point, it probably makes sense to add people who just aren’t comfortable switching yet or who maybe had a a rough go of it for awhile but are active again, but I feel like it would be weird to add someone 4 months down the road. Bonding happens so much faster (IMO) on fb because we see real names and faces, pictures of families are shared, etc.
Dx: PCOS
DS1 born 11/2014
DS2 born 11/2018
3 previous losses
Rainbow baby due 12/2021 - Team Green
For those that are having a hard time with the app, I've found that if I just go through Google on my phone, the website works relatively the same, but functions easier. Still having the love tit permission issue, but the loading and ability to stay logged in, is so so much better!!
Also, I will admit since school started I am far less active. I am busy all day and most if the night and the bump app is just hard to navigate and post too. I am much more inclined to be able to scroll through Facebook when I have a free moment. I miss being on here as much as I was and seeing how all you ladies are!! I am really excited for a Facebook group to start.
Two Furbabies: Mika (american eskimo) and Gypsy (wire-haired terrier, dachshund mix)
Twins: Kaiden and Zara born 10/2018 conceived after 6 years of infertility via a medicated IUI
I love the idea of a facebook group and would be happy to help admin if needed! I will be a FTM and probably have no idea what I'm doing on that end, but that will leave me with a lot of time to facebook
I love the Bump and our community but do find that, as often as I look in the group I don't post that much as I don't find it that user friendly. I think facebook would be way easier and have friends who are in FB groups from their bump months and find people are more active on it.
This group feels so completely different. I don't post a ton and I am iffy on the whole facebook thing anyway. Like I've posted maybe 1 picture of my son on my own page to date and he's 19 months old! I also have a very unique name. I am just super torn but I would like to maybe consider it if I met the agreed upon criteria....
We’ve been working on some rules for the group to maintain a positive environment, deciding how to address people if they become inactive in the group.
We’re also discussing criteria to add people to the group. After we get everything organized, we’ll open things up to adding people.
Thank you all for your input here! We’re taking the feedback to heart trying to make the best group for everyone!
The guidelines for being added to the (secret and private) Facebook group are as follows:
- Must be an active member of the November 2018 BMB (FB admins will discuss and/or vote on any gray areas).
- Must not have been reported for SPAM or abuse on the November BMB.
- You must have been active on the November 18 BMB in the last month on a thread other than this Facebook discussion.
- If you create a FB account to join the group, you must use your real name to ensure fairness and group security, but are welcome to add "November" to your last name i.e. Jane Smithnovember".
K,L,M,N = @runningyogimama
O P Q R S = @booksandcoffee
T,U,V,W,X,Y,Z= @firsttimespartanmom
Let me know if you have any questions.
Thanks for getting this up and running!
DD1: 8/2014
TTC #2: 6/2017
BFP 8/3/2017 | CP 8/4
BFP 10/16/2017 | CP 10/21
BFP 12/18/2017 | CP 12/28
BFP 2/15/2018 | EDD: November 2nd | It's a girl!
DD2: 10/2018
Lol...but seriously, there is no one assigned to those letters.
I'm not sure I'm comfortable joining the group if one just needs to post one time in one thread in one month. We'd be letting anyone in which isn't really safe.
Sorry, I don't mean to be the activity police, but this concerns me. Am I the only one?
ETA: oh, I guess this rule is taken in conjunction with the rule about being an active member of the bmb? So it doesn't just go off of one post in the last month being the definition of active?
DD1: 8/2014
TTC #2: 6/2017
BFP 8/3/2017 | CP 8/4
BFP 10/16/2017 | CP 10/21
BFP 12/18/2017 | CP 12/28
BFP 2/15/2018 | EDD: November 2nd | It's a girl!
DD2: 10/2018