@kns1988 I'm glad yours was nothing serious! Usually I'd be more worried, but since it's happening to both and pregnancy causes all kinds of random aches/pains - I'm not too concerned. Will definitely call regardless though.
@wolfmum uuuugggghhhh batwings. So cute lol. I'm usually a stomach sleeper too so maybe my body just isn't used to all the pressure overnight, especially now that there's a lot more to support lol. Again, not too worried but definitely a random pregnancy symptom that I wasn't prepared for.
@roonilwazlib-2 we had the jumper and loved it. I heard that the jumper can be better for development, but honestly, I don't even remember what it was that they said. We also had the door jam jumper thing that you hang in a doorway/archway. She loved it, but by the time we got that one she was crawling and didn't want to be in either jumper anymore.
Okay, rando question of the day: when (how many weeks?) should you get maternity photos taken? I'd like something done, but am not into the whole crazy fancy photo shoot idea... but still. STM+ moms?
@wkuandrea FTM here, but I've googled this extensively lol and 7 months seems like a sweet spot. Still have enough energy to be on your feet, but baby bump is significant enough to look obviously there and cute. Also, you never know what can happen so it's best to plan with a couple months to go in case your LO decides to make an early debut. But curious to see what STMs say! Good question.
@wkuandrea I think most photographers say around 30 weeks. I definitely wouldn't want to go later than 34 weeks. I hate to say it, but those last 4-6 weeks of pregnancy can really make a woman balloon, and quickly. Arms are bigger, hips are bigger, face is rounder, etc. so if your body shape is something you think you may be concerned with looking back at pictures, I'd stick with early 3rd tri. I had pics around 32 weeks with DS and I felt I still looked cute in my clothes so it worked out lol. I have pics scheduled at 29+5 this time. Nothing fancy, just jeans and a cardigan at my friend's farm in the autumn sunset (can't wait, she's an amazing photographer!).
Oct 16: Spontaneous BFP | m/c @ 9w1d (massive SCH) | D&C Apr 17: IUI #1 = BFN May 17: IUI #2 = BFN Jun 17: IUI #3 = Late BFP (18 DPO) | NMC 17Jul17 @ ~6w Aug 17: IUI #4 = Cancelled due to premature ovulation | TI = BFN Sep 17: IUI #5 = Cancelled due to overstimulation (10+ follies) Nov 17: IVF #1 = Cancelled due to non-IF related health issue | TI = BFN Dec 17: IVF #1 = Puregon 200, Menopur 75, Orgalutran, Suprefact trigger due to OHSS risk | 22R, 18M, 16F, 10B frozen Feb 18: FET #1 (medicated) = BFN Mar 18: FET #2 (natural cycle) = CP (beta 1: 54; beta 2: 0)
Apr 18: FET #3 (natural cycle) = cancelled due to missed ovulation
Apr 18: FET #3 (natural cycle) = BFP! Beta 1: 201 Beta 2: 585 Beta 3: 3254 Beta 4: 9715
U/S 19May - one bean measuring on track with a HB of 125! EDD: 07Jan2019 Team Green My Rainbow Baby Boy born 03Jan2019
@wkuandrea I am a photographer, and I usually schedule people between 30-35 weeks. A lot of people start to feel really uncomfortable or experience more swelling in their face in the last few weeks, and I have had several friends (myself included) deliver at 37 weeks. I would say also that for January babies, depending where you live, you may want to schedule a little earlier if there is potential for a lot of snow in your area through December.
@wkuandrea I'd say between 30-35 weeks. When I was pregnant with DD, I loved those weeks the most. I wasn't planning on doing maternity pictures because I wanted to save the money and do newborn pictures instead. I happened to run into a lady at work who was building her portfolio and wanted to take pictures for me for free. I was like 38+ weeks when we took them and there are MAYBE 3 pictures of the 40 that I actually like how I look. It was hot and humid and I was just tired.
@kianarain it’s your milk glands. Some people have breast tissue/milk glands all the way up to their armpits. I do too and this is my third pregnancy with terrible armpit pain. The good news is that once baby comes and you pump/bf the pain goes away. The bad news is there is nothing you can do for it while pregnant. I have talked to multiple OBs and lactation consultants about it and they said it happens sometimes. Good news is that I always had a great supple so hopefully you will enjoy the same haha
@BeachMama7693 I was thinking it was something to do with growth/development. The doctors are thinking it's a skin infection, but it just doesn't feel accurate to me (no raised skin, rash, itching, etc.) so we did some blood tests & I'm waiting on results. I don't want to start pumping antibiotics into my system w/o knowing exactly what's going on in there.
STM+s: I feel like we were discussing hospital bills/insurance elsewhere, but I just got sucked into an insurance spiral and can't find the thread, so gotta ask - about how much did they bill for your guys' LOs? I have a $2500 OOP max and am expecting to reach that for me, but should I also anticipate meeting that for her? (Given no complications & in-network coverage.) I am such a control freak and just want to try to make sure there are no surprises. I'm trying to get a quote from the hospital but am getting the go-around and then some, so I will be seeing a rough estimate for "facilities only" (don't we share the same hospital room....?) tomorrow. I just want to plan plan plan.
@kianarain when I had DD they billed me for her to stay in my room. I don't remember how much it was a night but I'm thinking it wasn't * that* much. Assuming everything goes well I would not expect to meet the $2500 for LO.
@kianarain I didn’t meet my 2500$ OOP and they bill fairly little for the baby if I remember so definitely weren’t close for that. I think I was billed like $1400 out of pocket for the whole hospital experience but I hear that’s low.
@wolfmum oof, yeah that sounds nice! I fully anticipate meeting my $2500 OOPM (I used the cost estimating tool through my insurance, it's awesome) but am trying to estimate how much more we're going to have to consider for little girl. I figure it's already going to be a stressful time, I want to minimize any financial surprises as much as humanly possible so we can focus on what matters.
I did maternity shots around 32 or 34 weeks if I remember correctly. I’m going to schedule a photo shoot in November this time to try and use them for Christmas cards! If I can do math correctly I’ll be closer to 28 weeks but I’m already noticeably pregnant! This time will be more of a family shoot style.
With DD1 my photo shoot was in our home and I felt way more comfortable since the photos were primarily of me with a few of me and DH.
I’m not planning to do maternity photos but we did already book our newborn session. I’m planning on skipping Christmas cards and doing “new year new baby” type announcements as soon as we get the newborn photos back. Saves on the number of cards to send!
@kianarain sounds similar to my experience. First they said it was irritation from deodorant and sensitive skin, then they did an ultrasound to make sure it wasn’t a mass or an issue with my lymph node. When that was all clear they just said it was fine and it see how it was after I have the baby. That was 4 years ago, so now I just know it’s normal for me when pregnant. I hope yours doesn’t get as bad as mine! It’s sooooo tender and I don’t wear tank tops because I’m self conscious about how weird it looks
I only remember getting one bill for my LO and that was from the doctor's doctor's office for her check up in the hospital. Everything else was covered under me, I guess.
I think I got a bill for $500 when DS was born. We even had a week long stay at the hospital. I work for the hospital, so my healthcare is pretty good.
Me: 29, DH: 31 Married: October 2014 Began TTC: April 2015 BFP #1: 9/18/15. EDD 5/18/16. MC 10/26/15. (9w) BFP #2: 2/27/16. EDD 11/7/16. MC/D&E 4/20/16 (11w) BFP #3: 9/22/16. EDD 5/29/17. DS born 4/24/17 BFP #4: 5/20/18. EDD 1/23/19.
I forget if we have a specific registry thread, but for anyone who is using Amazon, what are your thoughts or experiences with the “group gifting” option? I have some big ticket items on my registry that I don’t actually expect anyone to buy. This would give people the option to contribute a smaller amount towards my stroller,for example. On the one hand it seems like a good idea since there’s only so many small items on my registry (I already am getting sooo many hand me downs) but on the other hand it’s basically just a creative way to ask for gift cards? What do you guys think? Has anyone used this option?
@kaf1788 I think it's fine as long as you also have plenty of items that are affordable individual gifts. I recently attended a wedding where the wedding registry was almost entirely expensive group gift items, and it was really annoying.
I had DH use our DSLR to take pictures around 36-37 weeks in our back yard against our fense lol it actually worked out really well, and really my goal was just to get some pics of me pregnant to keep for myself, not to frame in the house.
DD's total hospital bill was $4500, BUT that's the raw bill, so it then depends on how much your deductible is and how much insurance covers. I believe my insurance does 80/20, but I'm horrible at knowing what gets covered at what point. @kianarain basically we're mentally preparing ourselves that worse case scenario (because you really can't plan completely. Baby could need to go into NICU, need additional testing, etc.) we meet out OOPM for both of us. For us, OOPM is $3500/person, $7000/family. So at worst our bill will be $7000, but it'll be nice if it's less.
@sweetyjenj that's our plan too! Just expect to pay OOPM for both of us (knowing very well that I'll hit mine), and anything under for her will be a pleasant surprise.
Anyone else have a family OOP max vs individual OOP max?
Health insurance is confusing and ridiculous. Ive had zero luck getting answers on anything. Ex: I got an EOB for my genetic testing that said my responsibility was $13,000
@alannac1 health insurance is so confusing!!! I hate it! We have a family max, but ALSO a per person max...so basically, between all 3 of us (future 4 of us) once we hit $7000 then we've hit our max, but if it's only one person, then that one person can't go over $3500. If I AND DS each meet our $3500 OOP max, then even DH's insurance is free for the year because our whole fam max is fulfilled. Trying to call and get answers seems like it makes me more confused, and sometimes I've had it where I'll call 3 times and get 3 different answers. Not helpful.
kianarain not a STM here, but I would also call your insurance company to get an estimate. Ours gives us a sample at the beginning of each year of what you might expect to pay for diabetes, leg surgery, birth of a child, etc. with estimates. Others may end up having $18,000 or more billed to their insurance or $1,500. There is such variation there is just no way to get insight from other people's experiences, I have found. Even if it's the same insurance company and same region it might be different for some reason.
Good luck- I also love to plan.
Bet if you call and are really friendly, especially talking to a woman, and just explain what and why you want to know they will try to help you out with average cost.
@kaf1788 I think it's fine as long as you also have plenty of items that are affordable individual gifts. I recently attended a wedding where the wedding registry was almost entirely expensive group gift items, and it was really annoying.
Agreed. I usually only go in on group gifts if I know several other people that want to purchase something together. I don’t like to give gift cards for showers, I find it awkward when they do the gift opening part. It sounds like amazon offers an option where you can contribute money towards a more expensive gift on the registry? I don’t know that I would do that, because what happens if other people don’t end up contributing to it so it isn’t purchased? Then when I go to the shower it’s like I didn’t give a gift.
I feel you guys on the insurance pains.. Insurance is the worst.. I work in healthcare so I thought that I would have an easier time understanding my responsibility/bills... NOPE. Every time I get a bill I have to cross reference the EOBs my insurance sends me because the bills make NO sense. They don't tell me what they are charging me for, and the line items don't even add up to the part that I'm suppose to pay!!! Sometimes it's more, sometimes it's less. Once they sent me a bill for >$1000 and told me that that was issued in error when I called them about it.. What if I had just paid that?!? I never pay medical bills now without looking at my EOBs and making sure that the total billed amt make sense. And plus also, I get charges for both the facility/hospital and the individual MDs who do the procedures, so it's ultra confusing trying to decide if I've already paid for everything or not. My previous insurance was great - I had premiums, but after copays, they covered almost everything at 100%.. no deductible, no coinsurance.. it was wonderful. With our current insurance, I was all excited to not pay premiums, but now we have deductible and at 10% coinsurance. 10% doesn't seem like a lot, but if my hospital bill is like 10 grand (which it will easily be for L&D) that's still $1000 I have to pay!! And since I'm due at the end of Jan, I get a shiny fresh new deductible to meet (insert eye roll).
When I had surgery the bill for everything after the surgery came through insurance before the actual surgery so the insurance sent me a bill as if it wasn't covered. I was so upset. I called and she said it wasn't right and it all had to do with timing. I really think they just do it thinking people will just pay without questioning. She fixed it for me and all was good, but definitely check all your bills!
So question about pumping at work. It’s kind of specific so I’m not sure if anyone else has a similar experience. I live and work in Illinois (so no additional breast pumping laws above and beyond the federal law). I work for an engineering firm that contracts with bigger engineering firms to provide program support. I know that my employer is required to provide me with a space to pump during work hours, but I work onsite at the customer’s office. What are my rights?
@mtengl I am insanely late to the dog conversation, but I just wanted to add something that might help you. My friend gave me this baby book from the 80s, and it actually had a section about preparing pets to meet a new baby. The book suggested that if you're going to make any kind of rule changes for the dog, like the dog can't go into a certain room, can no longer cuddle on the couch/bed, whatever it might be, to make those changes before the baby arrives. This makes the dog associate the changes to you and not to the baby, so avoids resentment from the dog toward the baby. I know it sounds kind of hokey, but I can totally see our one dog being jealous, and he's very devious. I don't want him looking at the baby with contempt, so I've been enforcing a no dog in the nursery rule, no more dogs squishing me for cuddles, etc.
@leighbrek that makes sense. Yeah we have already started no dogs in the nursery... our dogs sleep in our bedroom though and I don’t see that changing. They have already started to learn not to climb on me too.
I just got my breast pump in the mail (thanks Obama!), and I’m wondering if there is a way to test to make sure it’s not defective? I’d love to get rid of the giant box and stash it away. Also I think I only have a certain window to exchange it. Any STM+s have advice for this potentially silly question?
@mtengl The no climbing rule is a good idea for anyone, I think, because it gets harder and harder to shield that baby bump from an over enthusiastic pup!
@CoastieGirl79 we used a simple Dohm white noise machine the first 2 years, but just switched to the Hatch Baby and I am a fan! I love that you can program it, use it as a nightlight, and access it via Bluetooth.
@kmvisioli thanks! We are getting DS, who is 3, accustom to a sound machine. I'm surprised how much he likes it. When we visit my mom, she has one for me nephew, and DS asks to sleep with it on. Win!
@CoastieGirl79 we bought a sound machine for DD at a kid’s sale. The sound we put on is falling rain and when we travel we can play that same sound either on her kindle or from our phones so that is super convenient.
@alexandraseattle what brand is it? If it's medela they have EXCELLENT customer service and if it's broken at any time you can just call them and get a replacement and they send it out quick. You can't really test it at this time, especially since nipple stimulation can induce labor and you don't want to chance that this early. You can turn it on and feel if there's a suction on your hand or something, but that's about it.
@CoastieGirl79 how sweet! My DS1 decided he was done with the louder sound machine when he was 2. The Hatch Baby is quieter than the Dohm and has other sound options, so it’s worked nicely now that all our boys share a room. We programmed it to play “quiet time” music and have a brighter light on for the 30 minutes before “lights out” time, and then it switches to white noise with a softer night light.
Might be a dumb question, but if you get a C-section do you still have to deal with a lot of the postpartum pain/issues that come w/vaginal birth? Because that just doesn't seem fair lol. I've recently gotten into my head about C-sections and it's starting to freak me out. Recovering from a serious surgery and adjusting to a newborn seems like it would be crazy overwhelming.
Re: Ask Me Anything thread!
@wolfmum uuuugggghhhh batwings. So cute lol. I'm usually a stomach sleeper too so maybe my body just isn't used to all the pressure overnight, especially now that there's a lot more to support lol. Again, not too worried but definitely a random pregnancy symptom that I wasn't prepared for.
Married: 8/11/2007
DD: Born 2/3/17
BFP#2: 5/3, EDD 1/10/19
Andrea -- FTM at 39!
*TW loss and children mentioned*
Apr 17: IUI #1 = BFN
May 17: IUI #2 = BFN
Jun 17: IUI #3 = Late BFP (18 DPO) | NMC 17Jul17 @ ~6w
Aug 17: IUI #4 = Cancelled due to premature ovulation | TI = BFN
Sep 17: IUI #5 = Cancelled due to overstimulation (10+ follies)
Nov 17: IVF #1 = Cancelled due to non-IF related health issue | TI = BFN
Dec 17: IVF #1 = Puregon 200, Menopur 75, Orgalutran, Suprefact trigger due to OHSS risk | 22R, 18M, 16F, 10B frozen
Feb 18: FET #1 (medicated) = BFN
Mar 18: FET #2 (natural cycle) = CP (beta 1: 54; beta 2: 0)
EDD: 07Jan2019 Team Green
My Rainbow Baby Boy born 03Jan2019
Dating: 10/3/08 | Married: 12/27/14
TTC #1: August 2015 | BFP: 2/3/16 | EDD: 10/7/16
DD: 10/5/16
TTC #2: September 2017 | BFP: 4/28/18 | EDD: 1/7/19
DS: 1/9/19
STM+s:
I feel like we were discussing hospital bills/insurance elsewhere, but I just got sucked into an insurance spiral and can't find the thread, so gotta ask - about how much did they bill for your guys' LOs? I have a $2500 OOP max and am expecting to reach that for me, but should I also anticipate meeting that for her? (Given no complications & in-network coverage.) I am such a control freak and just want to try to make sure there are no surprises. I'm trying to get a quote from the hospital but am getting the go-around and then some, so I will be seeing a rough estimate for "facilities only" (don't we share the same hospital room....?) tomorrow. I just want to plan plan plan.
With DD1 my photo shoot was in our home and I felt way more comfortable since the photos were primarily of me with a few of me and DH.
Married: October 2014
Began TTC: April 2015
BFP #1: 9/18/15. EDD 5/18/16. MC 10/26/15. (9w)
BFP #2: 2/27/16. EDD 11/7/16. MC/D&E 4/20/16 (11w)
BFP #3: 9/22/16. EDD 5/29/17. DS born 4/24/17
BFP #4: 5/20/18. EDD 1/23/19.
DS 05/29/2013
M/C 02/14/2017
M/C 06/05/2017
C/P 03/01/2018
BFP 05/17/2018 EDD 01/27/2019
Married: 8/11/2007
DD: Born 2/3/17
BFP#2: 5/3, EDD 1/10/19
Anyone else have a family OOP max vs individual OOP max?
Health insurance is confusing and ridiculous. Ive had zero luck getting answers on anything. Ex: I got an EOB for my genetic testing that said my responsibility was $13,000
Married: 8/11/2007
DD: Born 2/3/17
BFP#2: 5/3, EDD 1/10/19
Good luck- I also love to plan.
Bet if you call and are really friendly, especially talking to a woman, and just explain what and why you want to know they will try to help you out with average cost.
Dating: 2/2007 Married: 4/2011
TTC #1: 9/2016
*TW*
BFP #2: 3/9/2017 - CP: 3/10/2017
08/2017: DH's SA = normal
08/2017: Low progesterone (4.6) all other BW normal
11/2017: HSG Clear; Pelvic Ultrasound Normal; and AMH, FSH, and Estradiol normal
12/2017: 1,000mg Metformin
12/2017: 50mg Clomid + TI = BFN
01/2018: 100mg Clomid + TI = BFN
01/2018: RE Consult
03/2018: 5mg Letrozole + 50 units Gonal-F + 500 μg Ovidrel + IUI = BFP #3: 4/1/2018 - CP: 4/4/2018
04/2018: 5mg Letrozole + Gonal-F + Ovidrel + IUI = BFP #4: 5/2/18
Married: 8/11/2007
DD: Born 2/3/17
BFP#2: 5/3, EDD 1/10/19