IVF with donor eggs

adc0417 · July 2018

@knottie7777 So sorry girl that you need another surgery and have to wait till Nov/Dec. I’m sure it seems so far away, but it’ll be here before you know it. Keep yourself busy and get your body ready.
AFM, I have my lining check tomorrow and will have more of an idea of my transfer date then.

JamieH2000 · July 2018

@radmom27, @joslynj11, @c-town18- thanks ladies! We saw that baby had a strong HB of 155!! and was measuring good. SCH is still there and large, but they said it looked like it was clotting up so hopefully no more fresh bleeding! I was feeling pretty good yesterday about it all until I had some cramping last night that really stressed me out. I was constanlty worried I was going to start bleeding. Just counting down the days until Tuesday when we can check on baby again!

@knottie7777- I am so sorry girl, delays are just the WORST! obviously its good they are making sure everything is optimal, but its still so annoying. Praying this time goes fast for you and you can do fun things and not think about IF for a little!

@adc0417- good luck on your lining check!! Can't wait to hear!

prudence9-2 · July 2018

@JamieH2000 yay!! What a strong HB!!! So happy to hear!! Also happy to hear that SCH is clotting up!

adc0417 · July 2018

@JamieH2000 so happy and relieved to hear that the baby has a nice strong HB! Keep up the good work!!

My lining is 8.2 and so I will be starting the PIO shots on Friday.

knottie7777 · July 2018

@JamieH2000 so happy the baby had a strong heart rate ! That’s great .

Im bummed about the delay, but im relieved we have the eggs waiting for us for when I’m healed, just going to be a loooooong few months . I can’t believe it’s been one year since my last transfer . My fifth cycle last July I got pregnant and then had miscarriage in August , then the sixth and seventh we didn’t get any embryos make it to day 5 so that’s when we decided to go the donor egg route . So it’s been both a really long year but then it seems like it’s gone by fast too

c-town18 · July 2018

adc0417 - Great lining news! Remind me are you doing a fresh or frozen transfer? So exciting

knottie7777 - Wow, that really does sound like a rough past year you've had. I hope you can see the light at the end of the tunnel now (it sounds like you can). While all of our experiences are slightly different, everyone on here knows how awful IF and the delays that go with it are. We're all thinking of you!

JamieH2000 · July 2018

Thanks ladies for all the love!!

@adc0417- can't wait for your transfer day, come tell us all the details!!

@knottie7777- its crazy to think how long we have all been at this. The good news is that DE success rates are so high, that hopefully your first transfer will take and that will be the end of the waiting! Were you able to get your surgery scheduled?

knottie7777 · July 2018

@JamieH2000 I was able to schedule an MRI next week and then I bring the images and report with me to the surgery consult apt on August 1st , from there it will be scheduled , I’m really hoping I can get in by end of August to start my 3 month clock !

I was looking online at the Resolve support groups and I found a donor egg one 20 minutes away , so I signed up for one . I figured it would be great to meet other people who are doing this route and see what they have to say , even if it’s just a couple times a year I think it will be good .

laurad75 · July 2018

@knottie7777 I have never been to a resolve support group meeting but I did go to their New England Conference last fall and I really enjoyed it. They are a great group.

JamieH2000 · July 2018

@knottie7777- i really hope you can have it before the end of August too! I am part of a local resolve group and have made a few lifelong friends from it! Its nice to know people in real life and I would def check it out.

fivetimesnoluck · July 2018

@adc0417So excited for you! How are the shots going? Hope it's smooth sailing from here...

@knottie7777 I am so sorry for the delay, but at least you already have the eggs and are ready to go when you get the all clear. Keep us posted as your progress continues.

@JamieH2000 Any updates from your check in this week? Continuing to keep you in my thoughts!

JamieH2000 · July 2018

@adc0417- how did transfer go?! we want to hear all about it!!

@fivetimesnoluck- My ultrasound on Tuesday looked good with a HB of 180! So i graduated from my RE at almost 9 weeks. Nervous to not have the weekly ultrasounds. I am going to push my OB for lots since I still have the one non viable twin and the large SCH. How have you been? Any plans for #2 in the next year?

adc0417 · July 2018

So, we are now faced with another setback. All of the embryos arrested on day 3

( She was not a proven donor and so RE thinks that her eggs cannot handle freezing/thawing process. I just don't see the light at the end of the tunnel. Every time, I'm excited and think finally it's time, we are met with another setback. I'm so sorry for always sharing bad news with y'all. Now, we are in the process of looking for another donor, but no one that kinda even resembles me

We are also requesting them to fertilize the eggs and form into embryos before I even start another cycle. I hate to say it, but I actually miss the shots.

@knottie7777 I feel your pain lady!!

JamieH2000 · July 2018

@adc0417- omg NO! You don't deserve this. Is your clinic blaming the egg bank? I honestly don't know if i believe certain people's eggs can't handle the freezing/thawing process... seems like an excuse. i would follow up with the egg bank and see how often they have this issue. Will they give you another set of eggs for free? I would seriously consider finding a different egg bank or a different RE if the egg bank insists its the lab and not their eggs. Is Fresh an option financially? I just feel like it may be worth it to get hopefully lots more eggs. I am SO sorry girl, I wish I could fix this or do anything to help!

adc0417 · July 2018

@jamieh2000 Thankfully we are enrolled in a shared risk program, where a take home baby is guaranteed. It actually is true that eggs are much more fragile than the embryos and sometimes do not survive the freeze/thaw process. I do have a phone meeting with my RE tomorrow morning when I will be speaking to him extensively about what could have happened. It is a well reputed clinic in this area. She is a new donor, and the egg bank was waiting for our results to release her other egg lots. This time, we will be going with a proven donor. The one we are considering has had 3 pregnancies from her 3 lots, plus she has another additional lot that we can purchase for a sibling. I don't think she resembles me, but I do like and relate to what she wrote in her personal essay. Did you go with someone who resembles you physically?

JamieH2000 · July 2018

@adc0417- o thank goodness you have the shared risk! Very good choice! You know, my first donor (who got pregnant) looked a little like me in some of her younger pictures. Our second donor wouldn't be mistaken for my sister or anything, but could look way more different if that makes sense? We don't have the same eye color but both have brownish hair. I tried to pick someone that just didn't have overall very strong/distinctive features (like big nose, specific shaped eyes, etc). I would call her very "generic" in the nicest of ways, with overall being "pretty". With me having brown curly hair/brown eyes and my DH having dirty blond hair/blue eyes, its a toss up on what our genetic child would have looked like anyways. I'm just hopeful that my child will resemble DH more and if not, at least not look just like the donor pics you know? In the end, physical isn't nearly as important to me as personality/intelligence/etc. Hard to know how much of that stuff is really genetic, but I'm hoping we will have lots of influence there

laurad75 · July 2018

@adc0417 I’m just catching up and read your update. Devastating. I agree with Jamie that the donor doesn’t need to look exactly like you but maybe have similar features to you or your partner. My donor didn’t really look like me but had a fair complexion and blue eyes.

Im just so sorry and really glad you have a plan B.

adc0417 · July 2018

@JamieH2000 @laurad75 Yes, that’s exactly what we did. We decided to go with someone who has black hair/dark brown eyes; essentially similar features like mine but doesn’t look like me. Hoping our child will look like my DH. She seems to have similar personality to me and is educated, but I know that sometimes is the upbringing and your life. Plus epigenetics can play a part in that too. More essentially, she has 3 ongoing pregnancies. So keeping my fx. This time we are going with the freeze all option.

c-town18 · July 2018

adc0417 - Sorry for the slow response, just read your update. Ugh, I'm so sorry! I know it's really hard to see the light at the end of the tunnel when this kind of BS keeps happening. DH and I had to keep reminding ourselves that although there were a lot of moving parts and factors outside of our control, we had still chosen an option that has a high success rate and eventually it was going to work out for us. Let us know what your RE says. My first donor looked a lot like me and was of the same ancestry as my family which I thought was perfect but she turned out to be a total scatterbrain/dud ("forgot" to take her stim meds for a day and the whole cycle imploded and was cancelled). The second donor I chose did not look much like me and did not have the same ancestry, but I liked how she came across in her questions, she's objectively pretty, and most importantly for me she was a multiple-time proven donor. I think having a donor cycle fail really changes your perspective about what is important in a donor. Some of the ladies on here had great results with first time donors, but after losing money on the first debacle, finding a proven donor was the most important thing to me.

adc0417 · July 2018

@c-town18 that’s exactly right!!! After our second donor, we for sure gave up on having the same ancestry/ethnicity. The mistake I made this time was pick a lot of frozen eggs from a first time donor. I didn’t realize that the freeze/thaw process can still make such a difference for some eggs, specially depending on how and where they were frozen. I assumed that since now that we have these eggs retrieved from a young girl and at hand, we’ll have at least a few that would form into successful embryos. So, for our 4th and hopefully the last donor, we picked someone who’s had multiple positive outcomes(the most important), completely different ancestry, doesn’t look like me. Like you said, after all the setbacks, finding a proven donor becomes the most important thing.

adc0417 · July 2018

@c-town18 how’s your pregnancy coming along? How far into it now?

c-town18 · July 2018

adc0417 - Also, never feel sorry for reporting bad news to the board. We're here for the good and bad, and to help each other through the bad times. *TW* I'm 18 weeks. So far so good, but I haven't quite been able to let my guard down yet due to past experience. I'm slowly beginning to believe that it might actually be for real this time though. Thanks for asking!

fivetimesnoluck · July 2018

@JamieH2000 That is great news! I know how hard it can be to graduate and not have the same level or frequency of care, but it's such a great milestone at the same time!I hope your OB will be kind and understanding as you make your way through the last few weeks of the first trimester! Is the doctor someone you've seen for a while or new to you? Keep us updated. I am still crossing all my things for you and this sweet babe!

As for me, we have 4 remaining embryos, but I was told by my RE and OB after delivering DD that I should seriously consider using a surrogate if I wanted another. We haven't wrapped our heads around that, or discussed what that really means, or if that is anywhere close to feasible. I know if it were more straightforward, I would totally do it again. But it's not, so that sucks and will lead to some deep talks in the future.

@adc0417 Oh my gosh. I am so sorry that happened. I can only imagine the hurt and frustration. But - I am thrilled to hear that you are part of a shared risk program and already have a plan to move forward. I think your plans for the new donor make a lot of sense and will put you in a great position to have a successful outcome! Keep us posted on next steps.

JamieH2000 · July 2018

@fivetimesnoluck- My OB is brand new to me, but my old one from a few years ago moved away so i had no choice but to find a new one. I picked one my friend who went thru RPL and IVF went to, so hopefully she is used to high maintenence patients

I am sorry to hear they are recommending a GC for you! Did you have a complicated delivery or is it just because of your other issues with RPL? I can see how that is a SUPER big decision. Nothing that needs to be figured out now, but definitely something to think about in the future.

fivetimesnoluck · July 2018

@JamieH2000 I am hopeful the the OB and her practice are kind and understanding. Sounds like they should be!

For me, I had a complicated everything. HA! But seriously, whatever is at the root of my RPL caused challenges during my successful pregnancy too, we just had significant oversight throughout the entire term. It had been assumed by my RE (and was corroborated by the placental pathology report) that I have blood flow issues that contribute to poor placental health and therefor pose(d) risks to me and the babe. Not to mention, in the end, I ended up with severe pre-eclampsia and (not unexpected) IUGR (growth restriction) that led to DD being delivered 6 weeks early. When my OB delivered my placenta, she actually commented then on how unhealthy it appeared.

Definitely not going to make any decisions any time soon. Wish it were easier, but... at least I got one healthy, sweet girl.

How are you feeling this week? When is your next appointment?

@c-town18 How exciting you're at the halfway mark!

@adc0417 What's the latest with you? Keeping you in my thoughts.

@knottie7777 How are you holding up? Is your surgery scheduled? Any plans for a great distraction until then?

@laurad75 It's almost time for you to meet your sweet babe! How are you feeling?

@madscientist22 How are you doing? Has your retrieval happened yet, or around the corner still? Keep us posted.

@radmom27 Hoping your nausea has subsided and you are enjoying the second trimester.

knottie7777 · July 2018

@fivetimesnoluck I have my consult on Wednesday with the surgeon so I should get an idea of timeline by then . I’m hoping for surgery at beginning of September so then transfer could be in December . Thinking about booking a trip to Vegas in October to break up the wait ! We went last October and were there for the shooting , thank god we weren’t at Mandalay Bay but the whole trip was so sad that we kind of want to go again to do a re-do and it would be a nice break while waiting

laurad75 · July 2018

@fivetimesnoluck Thank you for thinking of me. Yes, we are in the final countdown with just a few more weeks to go. I am (somewhat) high-risk given my age and the baby's multicystic kidney so I go weekly for an ultrasound and ob check up. It's nice to be able to see how he is doing every week and I'm hoping maybe it helps us predict when he will arrive. It's gone by so fast.

I can't wait for all of you to be writing similar updates.

knottie7777 · August 2018

@laurad75 that’s great ! Crazy you only have a few weeks left !

I met with the surgeon for my consult today. My surgery isn’t until October then with 3 month healing time , transfer won’t be until January, disappointing , but needs to be done. He said fibroids are acting like an IUD so nothing would implant . He said I will likely need a hysterectomy in 10-15 years ( I’m 33 now ) because the fibroids will keep coming back . Crazy I have both egg issues and uterus issues that are totally separate problems. Hopefully after this everything will be perfect ready to go . I’ll be following all your updates in the mean time!

adc0417 · August 2018

@fivetimesnoluck thanks for thinking of me. We had another mishap happen. My RE passed away in a water ski accident this past weekend. He was such a nice human being as well as an excellent situation. I feel that so far everything that could’ve gone wrong, has. I can probably write a book about it all. Anyways, so we have to now change our RE, but the good news is our eggs just got shipped today.

@knottie7777 that is so frustrating girl!! I feel your pain, but hang in there

@laurad75 wow only a few weeks left!! Nervous? Excited? Or both?

laurad75 · August 2018

Oh my gosh @adc0417, that's so sad about your RE. How awful for his family and staff.

I'm mostly excited but definitely have some anxiety about when I will deliver. I am a planner so the anticipation of not knowing when it will happen is difficult. at my OB appt a couple of weeks ago the dr said 'do you have any other questions?' and I said, 'yes, when will I deliver this baby?'. She chuckled and then estimated it would be close to my due date. She said of course there are exceptions but when we know the actual dates of fertilization and such the baby usually comes pretty close to schedule. That made me feel a little better.

fivetimesnoluck · August 2018

@adc0417 I am so sorry for your loss and the loss to his family and friends. Wow. That is just devastating. You really have had one hit after another. I am hopeful that your plans are not delayed significantly. It is great news to hear that the eggs have shipped and are on their way to you! Keeping you all in my thoughts. xo

@knottie7777 Good to know the plans are moving forward, but I know the continued delays are frustrating. I hope that you all can get out to Vegas or do something else fun in the meantime to help the next couple months go by quickly! Definitely keep us posted.

@laurad75 The not knowing is so hard! Without any risk factors, most women I know have delivered their first right around their due date. And like your doc said, your timeline is known, so that allows for a bit more confidence in the math! Can't wait for you to meet that sweet boy!

JamieH2000 · August 2018

@fivetimesnoluck- omg that is alot of complications and a lot to consider. I could see why that is a big decision. I hope you are able to find a way to have a second child if that is your wish!!

@laurad75- wow, cant believe how close you are!! I am sorry to hear about the kidney issue. I am crossing everything for a super smooth delivery for you. Can't wait to hear about it and the name!

@knottie7777- aww no openings until Oct?! is there no way to get you in sooner or put you on a cancellation list?! I hope you can take these months and try to do fun things then!!

@adc0417- omg that is soo tragic! I feel like someone else on one of these boards posted about that, so you must have the same RE. I am so sorry for you and their family of course. I really hope you have a much smoother road from here on out.

AFM- had another scan today and baby was measuring right on track at 11+1! the SCH has shrunk in half over the past four weeks, so i hope its gone soon. Should be going in for my NT scan in a week or two and then no appt until 15 weeks! Not sure what I will do!

c-town18 · August 2018

knottie7777 - Ugh, sorry about the delay. I hope you can stay busy and just enjoy life in the meantime. You know we're all rooting for you friend! Can't wait for things to get moving for you.
JamieH2000 - Glad to hear things are looking good and on track! Are you going to find out the sex? Do you have a strong feeling that it's one or the other?

rachelh0912 · August 2018

Hey ladies! Sorry I have been so absent over the last few months. I had so much going on but ended up back on track as of July! I’m so thrilled to catch up on so many updates and happy news!! I know there are a few new names on here and I look forward to getting to know you guys! As for my old friends, so happy to be back and so happy to see what wonderful things are happening!!

AFM Things actually fell into place for once (finally!) and DH and I had our transfer this past Tuesday August 7th! We transferred our only embryo that looked wonderful after thawing and we are as nervous as can be! I’m driving myself crazy over everything I’m feeling or not feeling but hoping for good results! Again, I’m so glad to be back!

c-town18 · August 2018

@adc0417 - I just read what you posted about your RE. That's horrible and so shocking! So sad.

JamieH2000 · August 2018

@chitown18- good to hear from you! How far are you now? Are you on the PAIF boards?

@rachelh0912- congrats on being PUPO!! So glad things finally worked out and can’t wait to hear good news! When is your beta?

rachelh0912 · August 2018

@JamieH2000 thank you so much! And congrats to YOU on all the greats news! Yay!! My beta is 8/16! I’m going crazy analyzing all of this cramping when I know it’s actually just progesterone! Haha

JamieH2000 · August 2018

@rachelh0912- thank you! I am so excited for your beta- only 3 more days! Are you going to POAS first? We didn't.. and I waited for the beta call to go to VM so DH and I could listen together at home. It was such a special moment, but so hard to wait too

knottie7777 · August 2018

@rachelh0912 sending positive thoughts your way !

rachelh0912 · August 2018

@JamieH2000 Thank you so much! I was absolutely NOT planning on POAS before beta but was up at 5:00am this morning so nervous I could hardly stand it and caved. BFN unfortunately. My beta appointment was earlier but since I already know the results im just waiting for the news and their recommendation of what to do next. DH and I are crushed but we had stayed cautious since transfer.

@knottie7777 Thank you so much for the positive thoughts! Like I told @JamieH2000 we got a negative on FRER this morning so we already know our outcome this time unfortunately. Hoping we can either get some answers or some closure since this was our only embryo! You guys are the best and so supportive! It definitely helps to have people who know exactly what you’re going through.

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