Me: 34 DH: 34
Married 10/28/17
Our TTC Journey
TTC #1 February '18
Team Green turned Team Blue 10/15/18
TTC #2 January '21
BFP June '21
MMC/Blighted Ovum that led to D&C July '21
Jan '22 - started IF testing
BFP Jan '22
MMC/Blighted Ovum that led to D&C Feb '22
BFP May '22
Re: Weekly Randoms 6/25
DH had his interview today, so we're hoping he gets an offer by the end of the week!
Dx: PCOS
DS1 born 11/2014
DS2 born 11/2018
3 previous losses
Rainbow baby due 12/2021 - Team Green
@wildrainbow that is too adorable. He sounds like such a sweetheart.
@BabyBoyH92016 have fun on your girls trip! Take advantage of your me time for sure!
My random is our home has two showings this week. It officially hits the market next week, but our realtor did pre-marketing and has a few people coming through. Of course an odd smell developed in the back part of our house. I cannot find the cause of it for the life of me and am going insane. My sense of smell is so strong and DH doesn’t think it is that bad. I’m nearly convinced something has died somewhere and this is just the start of the smell. I hope I’m wrong and it somehow passes overnight.
Some tips
- get a new backpack or lunchbox that she is excited about. DD feels so big wearing her bag into school and even likes to help pack it
- They’ll probably tell you but ask what books they are reading and what songs they are learning so you can do them at home too
- send a picture of you and YH to school if she misses you
- Llama Llama Misses Mama by Anne Dewdney is a great book
- if she cries, tell her calmly that you’re going, she’s got this, and you’ll be back soon and then just leave (fast). Tell the teachers to call or text an update good or bad in an hour
There were 11 other offers! We offered the most but I think the realtor might have put in a good word for us too.
@bfpafter4years 11 other offers!? Whoa! Congratulations on your new home! Such awesome news.
@mockingjay1 - it's amazing they you had such a strong movement! Can't wait to feel it too. Good luck to your hubby and hopefully you get an offer soon.
@pink_polkadots - I am thinking I will have similar seperation issues when I have to go back to work. All the advice given so far sounds really good though. Sorry I have nothing to offer but good luck!
places to take a 1ish hour break anytime along the way is also appreciated. something appropriate for a reasonably well behaved 3yo. restaurants/tourist places? thanks all! i really appreciate anything you can throw my way.
one way, we’re staying at a hampton inn in pigeon forge and planning on spending a half day at the ripley’s aquarium.
Married 10/28/17
Our TTC Journey
Team Green turned Team Blue 10/15/18
TTC #2 January '21
BFP June '21
MMC/Blighted Ovum that led to D&C July '21
Jan '22 - started IF testing
BFP Jan '22
MMC/Blighted Ovum that led to D&C Feb '22
BFP May '22
Dx: PCOS
DS1 born 11/2014
DS2 born 11/2018
3 previous losses
Rainbow baby due 12/2021 - Team Green
We were looking for a new house (over a year now) and finally found one that met our short list or difficult requirements and accepted our offer so we had to get our house de-cluttered and clean to put on the market. I have never sold a house and boy does it suck, especially with a toddler and dog. So glad baby is in utero or I might go crazy. Its been on the market a week with multiple showings but nothing yet. (Where I live the market is hot for sellers so its discouraging.) Not to mention I don't do well with change so I am a bit anxious.
As if selling a house wasn't stressful enough my sister-in-law lost her battle with breast cancer 9 days ago. This sucks even more. She was only 38. My DH is the rock and I am the blubbering, anxious stressball in our relationship but am trying so hard to keep my s**t together for him as he goes through losing his sister. We still haven't figured out how to tell our 3 year old son. I really don't think he will understand but he deserves to be told.
On a happier note but anxiety inducing beforehand we had our 20 week ultrasound yesterday. (We did not do early testing.) Baby is healthy so that was a relief. He/she was a mover during so made it a little difficult to get some good shots but we got a few movies out of it. We have an envelope with if baby is a boy or girl but am not sure when we will open it. My family and I were planning a BBQ with baby reveal but I have decided to cancel. A baby reveal party was never a big priority for me and with everything going on I am just in the mood to have DS, DH and I find out together instead of the hoopla.
I may not be on much for a bit as we have my DH extended family coming into town for the memorial service this weekend and if we sell our house packing will ensue. I just wanted to stop by and say I am still here just not active at the moment. Hope everyone is doing well!
The day after we learned about the kids in May, I was let go from my job of 6 years due to restructuring and them making my position obsolete. I was completely blindsided by this. I had a phone conference with HR at 3 and was told that day would be my last day. No warning, no 2 weeks, no severance, just the option to file for unemployment. They claim not to know I was pregnant, but I texted the head of HR when we announced and she claims to have never received it. No point in a lawsuit. So here I am, pregnant and job searching. I've had several leads and am waiting to hear back from 3 after final interviews Friday and yesterday.
DH is having his own family issues that are tearing his immediate family apart now, but I won't get into that. It's just another stress on us. We know how things are going to turn out and there is no good resolution. So we are just waiting for everything to blow up.
I did tell you I came down with bronchitis. I was lucky this time, didn't turn into pneumonia. DH and DS managed to stay healthy, thank goodness. My recovery time wasn't bad, only 2 weeks this time. Still have weakness in my lungs and I now am back on medications I weaned off of years ago because I still get random coughing fits.
With all of this going on I became severely depressed. I've battled depression since I was a teen, was even suicidal back then. Well, those thoughts came back, and the only thing keeping my sanity was DS and this baby. DH called me out, saying I was detached and distant. I did try hiding it from him because he didn't need any more stress in his life, but you can't hide something like that from the person who knows you better than you know yourself for the past 12 years. So I told him. I broke down, telling him the thoughts I was having and I was hanging on by a thread. He was pissed I kept it from him. His job offers counseling services, 10 free sessions for him or a spouse/child, and I got into it. It's helped. My fear was pregnancy hormones making everything worse, but we cannot confirm.
I'm back on the mend. My OB is monitoring me, and because at the anatomy scan fluids were in one of the baby's kidneys, they are sending me to a MFM specialist. I know it's a common issue and she's fine, they just want to make sure it doesn't get worse or just resolves itself. The counselor is helping, too. The thoughts are gone. Still depressed, but I'm looking at finding a new job as a new opportunity. All 3 I'm waiting to hear from are work from home and the pay is better than at my old job. I'd also have the opportunity to advance in these companies, unlike my previous job where I was stuck. If we don't get the kids, DS can use the furniture we bought for them and not need a new crib for the baby. We can't control DH's family, but we can limit how much exposure we have to them, since they are several states away.
If you managed to read through all that, bottom line, get help if you are depressed and/or suicidal. It's been one hell of a journey and I'm not quite done with it yet. DH has been a huge help, as has my previous BMB. Putting it all down here has also helped.
If you didn't read through it, TL;DR version - several events that occurred in a relatively short period of time, and potentially hormones from pregnancy, caused my depression to rear back up on top of suicidal thoughts. I'm on the mend, talking to a counselor and being monitored by my OB. I will be okay.
TTC since 6/13
Diagnosed w/ PCOS 4/9/15 - R/E recommended lifestyle change
BFP 4/10/16 - DS born 12/16/2016
SURPRISE! BFP 3/8/18
I hope everything improves as much as it can soon and I'll keep you and your family in my prayers. Hang in there and hold tight to your family.
● IUI #2: BFP - early M/C
● IUI #3: BFN
● IUI #4: BFN
● IVF/FET #1 (2 transferred): BFP! TWINS!
● FET #2 (1 transferred): BFP! BOY #3!
● Natural #1: BFP - M/C @ 8 weeks
● Natural #2: BFP - M/C @ 5w5d
@phoenix870509 thank you for sharing your major battle with depression and I'm so glad you've got help and I pray you continue on the mend.
@phoenix870509 - I am so sorry you're having such a hard time. That would be a lot for anyone. I'm so glad you got some help and I hope things continue to get better for you. FX you get offered at least one of those jobs!
Dx: PCOS
DS1 born 11/2014
DS2 born 11/2018
3 previous losses
Rainbow baby due 12/2021 - Team Green
@blue2mango I'm so sorry to hear about your SIL Good luck with moving and hooray that baby is doing well!
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LO arrived 11/9/2018! We have a baby!
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Me: 33 | DH: 41
Married: March 2016
TTC #1/IUD out January 2017
PCOS dx January 2018
Medicated cycle 2.5mg Letrozole CD3-7 February 2018
BFP 3/10/2018!
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@phoenix870509 I am so sorry that all this happened in such a short time, but I'm so happy you are getting help and feel that it's been beneficial for you. Thinking of you during this difficult time and hope things continue to stay good for you.
Married 10/28/17
Our TTC Journey
Team Green turned Team Blue 10/15/18
TTC #2 January '21
BFP June '21
MMC/Blighted Ovum that led to D&C July '21
Jan '22 - started IF testing
BFP Jan '22
MMC/Blighted Ovum that led to D&C Feb '22
BFP May '22
@phoenix870509: I am so glad you have been able to seek help, I know it's not easy. I've been there not too long ago, so I remember what it's like. I'm also the kind of person to try to hide it so I'm not worrying anybody. Be kind to yourself, allow yourself time to heal.
@phoenix870509 Thank you for sharing everything you did. I'm so glad you have been proactive and were able to ask for help. You are incredibly strong for doing that. Thinking of you.
I also want to thank you ladies for your love and support. I also wanted to let you know about 15 minutes ago one of the jobs I interviewed for called and tentatively gave me an offer, pending a background check. I've accepted it.
TTC since 6/13
Diagnosed w/ PCOS 4/9/15 - R/E recommended lifestyle change
BFP 4/10/16 - DS born 12/16/2016
SURPRISE! BFP 3/8/18
--------------------------------
LO arrived 11/9/2018! We have a baby!
--------------------------------
Me: 33 | DH: 41
Married: March 2016
TTC #1/IUD out January 2017
PCOS dx January 2018
Medicated cycle 2.5mg Letrozole CD3-7 February 2018
BFP 3/10/2018!
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@blue2mango I’m really sorry for your loss.
@phoenix870509 I’m sorry you are going through such a rough time, but am happy you are getting help and on the upswing.
@bfpafter4years Congrats on the house!!! So exciting especially since you are in a tough market! I hope everything goes smoothly through closing!
@phoenix870509 glad to hear you were able to get some help and am sorry you are also going through a tough time.
This is such a supportive community and it’s so nice to see how many people have offered words of encouragement and support!
@phoenix870509 I’m so sorry. You have so much going on. I’m so glad you’re able to get help. Know that you always have support here. I have struggled with anxiety for many years if you ever need to talk.
@phoenix870509 i am so glad that your husband reached out to you and his company offers such important counseling. we are here for you if you ever need extra support. you are never alone. i’m so sorry you’ve had such a rocky road these last few months. i sincerely hope everything works out for the best.
On a good note though, I don't think he liked being poked and let me know it. At least I think, I still question sometimes if it is really him poking me.
@wannaflickone Any luck finding the source of the mysterious smell?
@bfpafter4years Congratulations!!! I hope everything goes smoothly from here on out. How exciting!
@blue2mango I'm so sorry to hear about the loss of your SIL. I'll be keeping your and your H's family in my prayers. Good luck with selling your house too. You have a lot on your plate right now and that must be so stressful. Don't forget to take care of yourself during this time to make sure the stress doesn't build up.
@phoenix870509 Thank you for being so brave and sharing about your depression. That is really scary; it's great that YH noticed and said something about it instead of ignoring it. Good for your for accepting help and going to counseling, even though it must have been hard to take that step. I'm so sorry for all the family drama and all the stress you've been under. I hope no matter what that your cousins are well cared for, but I'm sorry it caused so much awful drama and tore the family apart.
DD1: 8/2014
TTC #2: 6/2017
BFP 8/3/2017 | CP 8/4
BFP 10/16/2017 | CP 10/21
BFP 12/18/2017 | CP 12/28
BFP 2/15/2018 | EDD: November 2nd | It's a girl!
DD2: 10/2018