October 2018 Moms
knottieamusements
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Advice for First Time Moms (March)
knottieamusements
member
Hello!
This thread is specifically for advice for FTMs. Pearls of Wisdom, things to not register for, things to absolutely register for, what you did or didn’t do that was fantastic that you want to share with other Moms (especially FTMs).
Edited title for clarity
This thread is specifically for advice for FTMs. Pearls of Wisdom, things to not register for, things to absolutely register for, what you did or didn’t do that was fantastic that you want to share with other Moms (especially FTMs).
Edited title for clarity
Re: Advice for First Time Moms (March)
https://www.lucieslist.com/
DD born April 2015 after many rounds of IVF and losses.
After much more of the same...
If you’re breastfeeding, only open, wash and sterilize 1 bottle before baby comes home. Some babies are picky about bottles and if he/she doesn’t like the style you picked, you can return the unopened bottles and get another kind to try & BF until you can get another bottle. (Not sure how EP and formula feeding moms handle bottles since I BFd my babies).
Also so I registered for 5 different types of single bottles and thank goodness I did! DS was so picky! He liked a specific kind, and DD liked a different kind. Thankfully now I have a kit of I think 8 different types of bottles that I let people borrow to see what their baby likes.
Our only miracle product was the halo sleep sack Velcro swaddlers. I can do origami, but traditional swaddling is witchcraft. Velcro swaddlers were a lifesaver.
I also adore my Tulas and particularly my ring sling, but baby wearing isn’t for every mama or every baby. Def worth a try though!
Bought two different contraptions to baby wear... I kept him in his bucket seat and stroller frame or did carside grocery pick up until he was big enough to go in the shopping cart.
Fully intended to breast feed... gave up at 3 weeks. Bought three different kinds of bottles... got a Dr Browns for free at 4 months and used that exclusively.
No one bought me the Velcro swaddlers and I didn’t want to spend the money or figure out how to roll a real swaddle, swore I’d just plop him down... swaddling came super easy to me.
Go with the flow and never beat yourself up if things don’t go how you thought they’d go. What works for one baby doesn’t work for every baby.
Be laid back. If you're uptight, baby will be uptight. Just let it happen and it will all be fine!
TTC#2: 2/2018; BFP: 2/26/18; MC 4/4/18.
TTC#2: 4/2018; BFP: 5/12/18; EDD: 1/19/19 (boy)
2 fur babies: Oakley Marley (11.5) & Ava Lynn (2)
Steal everything you can get your hands on from the hospital. They literally had to bring us a cart to load out stuff out. Extra diapers and wipes. The mesh underwear. Extra pads (I liked there’s way better than anything I found in the store). Whatever postpartum supplies they give you like witch hazel pads or dermablast. If you’re circumcising a boy, the little tubes of Vaseline are awesome. Way less messy than the big tub. The nurse was loading us up with goodies. No shame.
https://forums.thebump.com/discussion/12724965/maternity-clothes
Everybody told us us to take everything from the hospital, but we didn’t. I didn’t feel like I needed all that stuff and ended up throwing away a lot of the stuff we did bring home. They did bring me a too small belly binder after my c-section so I got 2, which was great because the bigger one was too big not too long after I got home. If you have a c-section, planned or not, ask for a belly binder. They don’t always give you one if you don’t ask and it makes moving around while you’re healing much less painful.
Agree with everyone on Halo swaddles!
Work out a sleep schedule w your partner so you're not both up losing your minds with exhaustion at the same time those first few weeks. Take different shifts.
If you plan on breast feeding or pumping make a basket with all the stuff you need so you can reach it easily. Include snacks and drinks.
Postpartum buy yourself some clothes in a size (or two) bigger that you fit in. Don't try to squeeze into your pre-pregnancy clothes and let yourself feel frumpy in maternity stuff. It helped me so much in not being hard on myself about the extra weight to have clothes that fit and make me feel slightly put together.
Don't buy too much in newborn/0-3 the kids grow out of them sooooooo quickly. All those cute little outfits you'll use but a few comfy ones because you'll feel bad putting your little newborn in something uncomfortable (or you'll snap the pic and then get them in comfy pajamas again).
Muslin blankets are awesome!! I previously had spring/summer babies in TX and those were awesome. This will be my first "fall/winter" baby/maternity leave and I'm not looking forward to the cold weather with a newborn. We were at the beach as soon as the babies hit 6 weeks old before lol.
I have two pieces of advice that I wish someone had told me.
First, if you get baby blues that last awhile, please see your Dr! I had them really bad after my first and tried to make it work until my 6 week appt, and it was miserable. Your hormones will be going bonkers, so keep that in mind, but it should get better, not worse after a couple weeks.
The second, I am totally pro-breastfeeding, IF it works! With my first, I tried for about 2 months before DH said it was not worth it, and it wasn't. I tried for a month to get him to latch and eat and it was a nightmare. The next month I tried pumping and bottle feeding and we dealt with projectile puke and a very fussy baby until that fateful day when DS doused both of us and the couch! DH said no more, and DS was a happier baby after! I tried everything! I cut out different things from my diet to see if it would make a difference, and nothing helped. He did do way better with the Similac Sensitive formula, too. It was such a relief to be done that I never really felt guilty about it, and if it doesn't work for you, don't! That said, #2 baby was a pro at nursing! She latched on the first day and never looked back!
So that's my 2 cents
DD 3/15/12
DD 6/3/14
#4 Due 10/26/18!
Don't buy too many newborn sized diapers, we had a ten pound baby and had to return all newborn sized diapers to the store, but also good to know you can exchange diapers at Target without a receipt.
Plus 1 for registering for things you won’t need right away. It was really nice not having to make any huge purchases for the first year since things like the exersaucer and high chair were already purchased and waiting for us to use.
Also agree with taking everything from the hospital. And make sure you have large pads in supply at your house.
Don’t hesitate to see a lactation consultant if you think anything’s wrong. Hell, go see one even if you think everything’s totally fine! I waited a couple of weeks because I thought everything was going ok, that it was just hard. Nope. I didn’t produce enough milk, so we supplemented with formula. He started off super small, probably because of that delay, and while he’s totally fine now (and got up to weight just fine after the formula), I always felt guilty about that.
Start getting out with the baby early. Take him to lunch, the store... it seems super daunting at first but (1) getting out saved my sanity big time, and (2) he got used to it really quickly.
Don’t be afraid to ask for help, and don’t feel like you’re a crap mom because you can’t “do it all”. I still call my MIL, begging for her to come stay with us a bit so I can have a hand, and DS is 15 months old, haha.
I’ll also add, if breastfeeding just isn’t working out, don’t beat yourself up. Formula is totally fine. We ended up calling it a day on bf at Day 10 when my milk never came in. Took so much pressure off.
+1 to checking that insurance might cover your prenatal 100%! Mine was during my first pregnancy so I only bought enough to get me to the first OB appt. next week.
What to do about pre-pregnancy clothes?? I know it will be at least a year (probably much longer) before I have a chance of things fitting again. Do you pack clothes away? Get rid of them and just get new/used stuff that fits when/as you need it? I know I have some tops that will work through at least part of pregnancy as they are stretchy and I won't care about them showing off my belly as it will be baby and not just fat. Ready to purge my closet but don't want to kick myself for getting rid of stuff either. What is a FTM to do!
Get a humidifer it helped with the dry air during the winter time.
Make meals for yourself and take time to try and shower.... I hardly ever ate because I was so worried about this little tiny baby that I didnt feel as good as I could have
Use the size 1 diaper if your baby is 8 pounds do not use newborn.. We figured it out after like 2 weeks of him constantly peeing out of the diaper and changing his clothes like 5 times a day. We thought it was sweat lol
And PPD and the baby blues are real! I missed out on wonderful times with my newborn because I was so down and wanted to sleep and irritated at the baby sometimes. Go to the doctor I never did and now because I'm pregnant again my hormones are back to happy lol
Edit to add - I was back in some of my prepregnancy clothes by 3 months pp (shirts mostly), so I plan to just leave it all in my closet. (Don’t worry, I’m not one of those bounce back immediately ladies - the clothes definitely didn’t fit the same, but I could get them on and wear them in public without looking ridiculous.)
DD 3/15/12
DD 6/3/14
#4 Due 10/26/18!
ETA: Pinterest has a ton of recipes you can use for this.