Hey all,
I've been put in an odd spot. Out of 3 big families, only one person stepped up to offer me a shower. When they asked for the address list, they told me they only wanted to hold it for my family and close friends which would only then exclude my husband's family.They said it was due to budget- mind you, i had already offered to pay for the venue and/or help with food I felt that it was incredibly unfair to leave out one part of the family, so I was wondering if I could just pay for my own shower and ask someone to facilitate it. Am I off base?
Re: Throwing my own shower
You are not owed a shower nor should you expect one. When someone hosts, they have to do what's right for them financially. And that might mean they can't afford to throw a party for both sides of the family.
Be gracious for what's being done for you. If the other side wants to be involved in a shower, someone can throw one. But it's incredibly tacky to throw one yourself.
ETA hopefully if someone from your husband's side catches wind they can offer to do one for that side. Good luck!
LFAF Summer 2016 Awards:
For example, in an ideal world you have about 40 people you want to invite - 20 of your friends and family and 20 of your husband's friends and family. Someone says, "hey, I'd like to throw you a shower." You say, "great, about how many people should I put on the list?" They say, "20." You say, "ok, and curb your list down to 10 of your people and 10 of your husband's people or whatever arrangement works for you and then give that list to the host.