On rehoming dogs, unless it's an issue of safety or allergies, I don't get why you would rehome. If you knew you would eventually have kids, why get a dog in the first place?
@msmonalisavito ours was DEFINITELY a safety issue. We spent several thousand dollars trying to keep both our dogs. They randomly started trying to kill each other when I was pregnant. (Which, yeah, they were pit bulls - rescues - no idea of their history and having two females was ultimate a recipe for disaster anyway). Trainers, behaviorists, etc. Nothing worked. But Sophie went to a home with a really nice guy who was single and had no other pets. It was a good thing in the end.
On rehoming dogs, unless it's an issue of safety or allergies, I don't get why you would rehome. If you knew you would eventually have kids, why get a dog in the first place?
@msmonalisavito ours was DEFINITELY a safety issue. We spent several thousand dollars trying to keep both our dogs. They randomly started trying to kill each other when I was pregnant. (Which, yeah, they were pit bulls - rescues - no idea of their history and having two females was ultimate a recipe for disaster anyway). Trainers, behaviorists, etc. Nothing worked. But Sophie went to a home with a really nice guy who was single and had no other pets. It was a good thing in the end.
This is totally a situation where rehoming was warranted. I'm sorry you had to say goodbye to her
I kind of want to re-home our cats to my mom's. She is in her 60s and lives alone and could use the company, and I am sick of there being cat hair and litter everywhere and can't imagine how I will deal with it when we have a baby. I adopted them with an ex 10 years ago when kids were nowhere on the horizon, and I love them but feel like I would be fine with them not living with us anymore DH has become way too attached though and would never let them go even though he is not pleased to be on cat litter duty for the foreseeable future.
*TTC History*
Me: 37, MH: 38; Married August 2017
TTC #1 October 2017: BFP on 12/1/2017, DD born 7/24/2018 @ 37+1 after induction due to preeclampsia
TTC #2 January 2020: AMA, dx with DOR in May 2020
IVF July 2020: 16 eggs retrieved, 14 mature, 12 fertilized, 3 blasts, 2 PGT-A normal
FET 10/7/20: BFP on 10/12/20!!! (EDD 6/25/21); First beta 10/16/20 (9dpt): 148; Second beta 10/19/20 (12dpt): 621; Third beta 10/26/20 (19dpt): 4732; Fourth (and final!) beta 11/2/20 (26 dpt): 22,000+
I'm not a fan of gender reveal parties (and I too would much prefer to call them sex reveal). Nor am I a fan of showers, although I'll probably have one against my will. My bf has already informed me I'm having one so I can get a bunch of stuff (FTM). I find all the attention kind of unsettling and awkward - and i hate those dumb games people play at showers.
I'm also not a fan of super unique spelling - although some gender-neutral names I do like. I've always liked Morgan for a girl, but DH is in the firm 'that's a boy's name' camp.
Dogs are alright - I used to be all about dogs all the time, but I had a fantastic dog for 14 years and when he passed, that was it for me. I just can't imagine getting another one. I love other people's dogs, though.
I don't really have an UO this week...? I'll have to think on it.
We rehomed our cat when DS started crawling because the cat got pissed and started peeing and pooping all over the place. He went to a friend and is super happy there. I don’t feel bad about it at all.
We lost our dog right after DS turned one and it was so hard. I got him just before I met DH and we both loved him so much. We have a Christmas ornament with his picture on it and I cried when I pulled it out this year. About 5 months after we lost him, DHs aunt had a litter of cavalier King Charles spaniels and talked us into taking one. DS loves him and they are best friends, but I haven’t bonded with him as much. I love him, and he’s well cared for, but I’m not quite sure I feel like he’s part of the family. DS and DH do though.
Lol well I guess my uo is I’m anti screen time. I wasn’t until my oldest was maybe 3 though and I started to see the immediate and huge negative impact it had (has) on him. Regardless of content - Sesame Street, Daniel tiger, etc. not all kids are like this but he definitely is. I let them have more in the summer and less in the winter. When they are more active, more exercise and fresh air... the crash from tv is ok. In the winter, he (and my younger 2 too but to a much lesser degree) they are already not getting as much as they need, and it like, pulls them too low.
My youngest was matched a little in the morning when his brothers are at school, and otherwise it’s weekends only and even then only after playing outside time, cleaning. Doesn’t happened every day.
I also roll my eyes at gender reveal parties. Esp bc I was always team green before. But I’d love a thread bc I want to gender reveal for the kids!
This will be my third kid. I had got rid of EVERYTHING. I used to be anti multiple showers but it’s the norm around here. My friends insisted on throwing one for my second.
If someone offers for this one I won’t say no...that’s my UO
On rehoming dogs, unless it's an issue of safety or allergies, I don't get why you would rehome. If you knew you would eventually have kids, why get a dog in the first place?
@msmonalisavito in our situation the answer is because you don’t know until you have a baby in the house how that will impact the dog. That dog was a rescue so I don’t know what she had been through but her behavior changed completely after our son was born and nothing we did to try to train her helped her adapt. I did not trust her around him.
We didn’t just drop her off at a rescue or something. We placed an ad and interviewed families until we found the right people for her. We keep in touch, she’s doing great.
Showers, sprinkles, gender reveal parties... I’m not a fan of any of them. I’ll gladly get a friend a gift for a new baby, but please don’t ask me to sit around with a bunch of women I don’t know and pretend to enjoy myself. Even my own baby shower for DS annoyed the hell out of me. It was huge, and half the people there were distant relatives or moms/MIL’s friends I barely knew. Plus I got the same stuff about a million times over - newborn outfits, baby socks, baby towels & washclothes, baby bathtubs, and baby body wash. DS is 7 and still uses baby body wash I got at my shower. I returned something like 20 towels & washclothes, 5 baby tubs, 40 pairs of infant socks, and about 30 newborn outfits.
@hfooter I think that if it’s the norm for your area or if someone offers it’s ok to have a second+ shower/sprinkle. My work will most likely have a sprinkle with diapers for us.
Formerly known as Kate08young August '18 Siggy April Showers:
Me: 28 H: 24 Married: 7/22/14 Baby L: 8/4/2015 August 2015 Moms Baby E: 11/18/2016 December 2016 Moms TTC #3 08/2017 BFP 11/27/2017. Twin B lost 11/22/2017, Twin A doing well.
Talk of rehoming dogs makes me sad. But you can see in some of the stories that it is the best situation for everyone, especially the dog. My dog is super gentle and patient with DS, but she is still a dog. And if she started to get aggressive in the house and working with a trainer wasn’t helping —what are you going to do? Keep the dog in the basement alone all day and night? A person in my IRL moms group does this and I think it is cruel.
Some people re-home for other reasons. My sister didn’t want to walk her high-energy dog and I thought that sucked. I think owners owe it to the dog to give them exercise and stimulation. But the dog lives on a farm now, with my sister’s SIL and runs around all day and is also trained to go into schools and help kids read. So I guess that was best for the dog, too, even though I still side-eye my sister for not meeting the dog’s needs.
Unfortunately my dog is looking like she needs to be re-homed. She has tried to attack my son twice. She has a history of biting me too. Before my son she was the baby in our house but now its just kind of sad. She has to be locked up so much because we can't trust her. I think we are going to do one more last ditch effort at training her (she will be 11 this year). If it doesn't work I plan on begging my dad to take her for me.
My UO is one I might get flamed for. I don't understand why people turn their children forward facing in the car seat so early! Unless there is a medical reason I think its too dangerous. DS will be rear facing for as long as we can stand it. So far 2.5 years and going strong.
@Krysta6 totally agree on turning the car seat around too soon. It makes me cringe when I hear people do it on LO’s first birthday.
Also when it comes to weird spellings of names—I was an elementary tutor all through college and so many of the kids just didn’t understand vowel sounds. One boy I worked with for a year was named “Kevin”, but his name was spelled “Kivan.” In no way do those vowels make those sounds. No wonder he had so much trouble learning to read...
@Krysta6 I'm so sorry about your dog. It's such an emotional decision. And it amazes me how often people pass judgement on it. Like it's my dog, I love the dog. Trust me it's not a decision I take lightly so I definitely don't need your judgement. Just know that you aren't alone and some of us have been there if you need to talk about it. I hope you can get a family member to take her, that would be ideal.
@kburg15 omg yes to the names! I had a kid named Duh-von-te, but his parents spelled it D’Vonta. It took me a month to reliably match the kid with the name because I kept looking for a girl.
Ok, I keep seeing "sprinkles" talked about like that is a thing I'm supposed to know. I'm assuming is it a baby shower, but somehow smaller? I've only ever been to one baby shower, and I was 12 at the time. I remember it being fun.
I won't really have a shower because I've recently moved, and my friends and family that would throw one are in a different state, but I'll travel back home and have a "meet the baby" get together after the birth. I don't really want gifts, since I'd have to fly with them home, plus a new baby, but I told my mom if people want to chip in for a cloth diaper laundering service, I'd take that.
DH and I are making our first baby purchases this weekend! It's becoming a reality. I'm keeping eyes on Craigslist, and wanting to get started now so our budget doesn't take a huge hit.
Me:32 DH:45 DSD: 20 DSS: 18 Team green baby due: Aug 6th, 2018
My son is 2.5 and we turned him recently and I was so nervous at first, but he is around 40 inches and close to being over the weight that is safe to rear face in the seat we have. Two of my friends turned their kids right after the first b day and I totally cringed.
Why would you turn around a car seat before the kid has sized out? I'm honestly curious. Is there some reason moms prefer front facing?
I think it’s mostly ignorance, which I find unforgivable in an age where you can find information about anything online.
There was a SAHD in a Facebook group I’m in that still had his daughter in an infant seat at nearly 18 months old and was asking for recommendations for a booster seat. Bless his heart, he took the correction well, but I’m sure you can imagine the amount of brains covering the walls from Mom heads exploding
@derbysquirrel I think some people also do it because it gives the driver or passenger more room in smaller cars. I have a friend with a smallish car and she turned her son when the second baby was born because she couldn’t fit a car seat rear facing behind the driver. He was 3 so it was fine. But I think that’s the logic some people have and if you had them closer that could be the issue? My son will still be rear facing when the baby comes, but I drive an SUV
@amac12999 we are in the same boat. DS is 2.5, and 37.5in and getting close to the weight limit. We turned him recently, too.
@livinthesunnylife my best friend was in a similar situation. She turned her oldest around 2 because of Room issues in her car and being able to fit 2 car seats. I respect that could be a reason behind it. Turning at a year old though as mentioned above, big fat nope.
@derbysquirrel I turned all my kids around 2.5 years old. They all had plenty of room rear facing. My reasons for each (which were factors younger but I wouldn’t turn then):
1) carsickness. He threw up in his car seat alllllll the time. Have you cleaned up a vomity car seat? It succccks. When we turned him it cured it. He still can’t read in the car but otherwise he’s fine. 2) I had 3 across at this point and because of the infant seat he and his older brother had to be next to each other, and the ff rf combo allowed access and major major screaming and fighting in the car, and it was a huge distraction driving. 3) similar to 2, 3 across and so he was always next to someone ff. The rf/ff combo gave him easy access to scratch his brothers face daily. He was next to my middle and the whole left side of this face was covered in red scratches where he drew blood.
@derbysquirrel a sprinkle is a smaller shower, or just a get-together but with diapers&wipes; at least where I love. We turned L forward facing at 2 because he was; getting carsick, would unbuckle himself and we couldn’t see, and he would throw whatever he Haag (food/drink/toys) into the back of the passengers head. Like up and over the top of his and the front seats. Since turning, he is awesome at entertaining E(still rear-facing), he passes food to her, and never gets sick.
Formerly known as Kate08young August '18 Siggy April Showers:
Me: 28 H: 24 Married: 7/22/14 Baby L: 8/4/2015 August 2015 Moms Baby E: 11/18/2016 December 2016 Moms TTC #3 08/2017 BFP 11/27/2017. Twin B lost 11/22/2017, Twin A doing well.
@derbysquirrel we turned DD1 shortly after she turned 2 largely bc in DHs car we couldn't fit 2 rear facing seats and DD2 was about to be in there. Also she hated not being able to see us in the car and screamed bloody murder 100% of the time she was rear facing in there. That said, probably 95%+ of the time she's in the car it's a trip of less than 2 miles to and from school or the park or the grocery store, so we're not too worried about it. If we had her in the car more often or for longer trips it would be another story. She is also large for her age and was over 30lbs when she turned 2.
I'm getting a minivan now so we will have DD2 and the new baby rear facing for a long while in there. DH is going to have to research how to get 3 across with 2 rear facing in his truck, because DD2 will only be be 14 months when this one is born, and he does daycare drop off every day. Other than that we'll be in the minivan all the time.
I get super ragey when people don't realize that the infant seat has a height limit. 99% of babies are going to outgrow that thing on height waaaaay before weight (I mean our weight limit is 35lbs which DD1 just hit at 2.5 years old). DD1 was too long at 9 months and the average 1 year old would be too long as well. When people keep their kids in the infant seat too long I just don't get it. It's not safe when they're bigger, and you're going to need another seat at some point anyway, may as well get it now.
I am in no hurry to buy anything. Or have a shower. Yes. We’ll be having one because this is SO’s first and his mother is beyond thrilled. I hate showers.
Since I brought up the forward facing car seat thing I will say car sickness makes sense to me. DS has barfed twice in the car, it’s kind of traumatic (it just happened after New Years) so I can see if that happened regularly I would turn him! And if he learned to unbuckle, we would be turning his ass around fast! I’m really just talking about the people at 1 who think it’s like a big kid celebration to turn your car seat. Your only child in the backseat. I don’t understand at all.
@calimom2524 we have 2 dogs a German Sheppard aka German shedder (sooooooo much hair lol) and a reserve dog she's only 6 months so now crazy shedding yet lol
oh and we have 3 cats... we are out numbered by animals lol
My DS gets really bad carsickness. He can't make it 20 minutes in the car. I've lost count at how many times he's thrown up. I have to ride in the back with him to help keep him calm and prevent him from looking out the windows (DH always drives). We put a towel up over the side window so he can't see out and that helps. I've gotten pretty good at reading his signals, and I have a giant bib that I put over him to catch it all and keep him clean. We used to have to stop, totally change him, etc. We've been through it so much that now we can keep on going, and I can clean it all up on the go. I've taken apart and cleaned the carseat so many times, I can do it in my sleep. And, it's damn complicated. He just turned 2, and despite that we're still debating on when to turn him around. It's a real tossup - his comfort (and a little convenience in not cleaning stuff for me) versus his safety. For long drives, we're going to try Dramamine. But, we can only do that for the 4hr+ drives. The short drives we'll still have to manage.
@lalala2004 That's what we've heard, so we've opted for safety over potential comfort. I get carsick, so I fear we have a lifetime of a carsick kiddo. It's just so heartbreaking when he's so sick. We literally can't feed him when we have to go for long rides.
Re: Unpopular Opinion - 1/11
August 18 Siggy Challenge: April Showers
I kind of want to re-home our cats to my mom's. She is in her 60s and lives alone and could use the company, and I am sick of there being cat hair and litter everywhere and can't imagine how I will deal with it when we have a baby. I adopted them with an ex 10 years ago when kids were nowhere on the horizon, and I love them but feel like I would be fine with them not living with us anymore
Me: 37, MH: 38; Married August 2017
TTC #1 October 2017: BFP on 12/1/2017, DD born 7/24/2018 @ 37+1 after induction due to preeclampsia
TTC #2 January 2020: AMA, dx with DOR in May 2020
IVF July 2020: 16 eggs retrieved, 14 mature, 12 fertilized, 3 blasts, 2 PGT-A normal
FET 10/7/20: BFP on 10/12/20!!! (EDD 6/25/21); First beta 10/16/20 (9dpt): 148; Second beta 10/19/20 (12dpt): 621; Third beta 10/26/20 (19dpt): 4732; Fourth (and final!) beta 11/2/20 (26 dpt): 22,000+
I'm also not a fan of super unique spelling - although some gender-neutral names I do like. I've always liked Morgan for a girl, but DH is in the firm 'that's a boy's name' camp.
Dogs are alright - I used to be all about dogs all the time, but I had a fantastic dog for 14 years and when he passed, that was it for me. I just can't imagine getting another one. I love other people's dogs, though.
I don't really have an UO this week...? I'll have to think on it.
We lost our dog right after DS turned one and it was so hard. I got him just before I met DH and we both loved him so much. We have a Christmas ornament with his picture on it and I cried when I pulled it out this year. About 5 months after we lost him, DHs aunt had a litter of cavalier King Charles spaniels and talked us into taking one. DS loves him and they are best friends, but I haven’t bonded with him as much. I love him, and he’s well cared for, but I’m not quite sure I feel like he’s part of the family. DS and DH do though.
My youngest was matched a little in the morning when his brothers are at school, and otherwise it’s weekends only and even then only after playing outside time, cleaning. Doesn’t happened every day.
I also roll my eyes at gender reveal parties. Esp bc I was always team green before. But I’d love a thread bc I want to gender reveal for the kids!
11/18/16 missed m/c 9w1
08/03/17 no hb 8w
If someone offers for this one I won’t say no...that’s my UO
@msmonalisavito in our situation the answer is because you don’t know until you have a baby in the house how that will impact the dog. That dog was a rescue so I don’t know what she had been through but her behavior changed completely after our son was born and nothing we did to try to train her helped her adapt. I did not trust her around him.
We didn’t just drop her off at a rescue or something. We placed an ad and interviewed families until we found the right people for her. We keep in touch, she’s doing great.
Formerly known as Kate08young
August '18 Siggy April Showers:
Married: 7/22/14
Baby L: 8/4/2015 August 2015 Moms
Baby E: 11/18/2016 December 2016 Moms
TTC #3 08/2017 BFP 11/27/2017.
Twin B lost 11/22/2017, Twin A doing well.
Some people re-home for other reasons. My sister didn’t want to walk her high-energy dog and I thought that sucked. I think owners owe it to the dog to give them exercise and stimulation. But the dog lives on a farm now, with my sister’s SIL and runs around all day and is also trained to go into schools and help kids read. So I guess that was best for the dog, too, even though I still side-eye my sister for not meeting the dog’s needs.
DS: Born 5-17-16
My UO is one I might get flamed for. I don't understand why people turn their children forward facing in the car seat so early! Unless there is a medical reason I think its too dangerous. DS will be rear facing for as long as we can stand it. So far 2.5 years and going strong.
Also when it comes to weird spellings of names—I was an elementary tutor all through college and so many of the kids just didn’t understand vowel sounds. One boy I worked with for a year was named “Kevin”, but his name was spelled “Kivan.” In no way do those vowels make those sounds. No wonder he had so much trouble learning to read...
No shame in my game
Me: 37 Him: 38
Married 11.07.2015
I won't really have a shower because I've recently moved, and my friends and family that would throw one are in a different state, but I'll travel back home and have a "meet the baby" get together after the birth. I don't really want gifts, since I'd have to fly with them home, plus a new baby, but I told my mom if people want to chip in for a cloth diaper laundering service, I'd take that.
DH and I are making our first baby purchases this weekend! It's becoming a reality. I'm keeping eyes on Craigslist, and wanting to get started now so our budget doesn't take a huge hit.
DH:45
DSD: 20
DSS: 18
Team green baby due: Aug 6th, 2018
DH:45
DSD: 20
DSS: 18
Team green baby due: Aug 6th, 2018
There was a SAHD in a Facebook group I’m in that still had his daughter in an infant seat at nearly 18 months old and was asking for recommendations for a booster seat. Bless his heart, he took the correction well, but I’m sure you can imagine the amount of brains covering the walls from Mom heads exploding
@livinthesunnylife my best friend was in a similar situation. She turned her oldest around 2 because of Room issues in her car and being able to fit 2 car seats. I respect that could be a reason behind it.
Turning at a year old though as mentioned above, big fat nope.
DS: 5.28.15
DS#2: EDD 8.31.18
1) carsickness. He threw up in his car seat alllllll the time. Have you cleaned up a vomity car seat? It succccks. When we turned him it cured it. He still can’t read in the car but otherwise he’s fine.
2) I had 3 across at this point and because of the infant seat he and his older brother had to be next to each other, and the ff rf combo allowed access and major major screaming and fighting in the car, and it was a huge distraction driving.
3) similar to 2, 3 across and so he was always next to someone ff. The rf/ff combo gave him easy access to scratch his brothers face daily. He was next to my middle and the whole left side of this face was covered in red scratches where he drew blood.
So... those were my reasons.
11/18/16 missed m/c 9w1
08/03/17 no hb 8w
We turned L forward facing at 2 because he was; getting carsick, would unbuckle himself and we couldn’t see, and he would throw whatever he Haag (food/drink/toys) into the back of the passengers head. Like up and over the top of his and the front seats. Since turning, he is awesome at entertaining E(still rear-facing), he passes food to her, and never gets sick.
Formerly known as Kate08young
August '18 Siggy April Showers:
Married: 7/22/14
Baby L: 8/4/2015 August 2015 Moms
Baby E: 11/18/2016 December 2016 Moms
TTC #3 08/2017 BFP 11/27/2017.
Twin B lost 11/22/2017, Twin A doing well.
I'm getting a minivan now so we will have DD2 and the new baby rear facing for a long while in there. DH is going to have to research how to get 3 across with 2 rear facing in his truck, because DD2 will only be be 14 months when this one is born, and he does daycare drop off every day. Other than that we'll be in the minivan all the time.
I get super ragey when people don't realize that the infant seat has a height limit. 99% of babies are going to outgrow that thing on height waaaaay before weight (I mean our weight limit is 35lbs which DD1 just hit at 2.5 years old). DD1 was too long at 9 months and the average 1 year old would be too long as well. When people keep their kids in the infant seat too long I just don't get it. It's not safe when they're bigger, and you're going to need another seat at some point anyway, may as well get it now.
oh and we have 3 cats... we are out numbered by animals lol
He just turned 2, and despite that we're still debating on when to turn him around. It's a real tossup - his comfort (and a little convenience in not cleaning stuff for me) versus his safety. For long drives, we're going to try Dramamine. But, we can only do that for the 4hr+ drives. The short drives we'll still have to manage.
August 18 Siggy Challenge: April Showers