@celainev Where I live (Deep South), no matter how much you tell people you want gender neutral baby things, if they know the sex of the baby, they WILL get you gendered items you didn't register for. If you told people you wanted gender neutral things for a baby whose sex everyone knows already, they would make extremely ignorant comments about gender. Many people here do not believe that gender is different from sex (not starting a discussion on this, just saying what an opinion is here). So if you're having a girl but don't want a bunch of pink princess stuff, you can't tell people you're having a girl. And you will get pink princess stuff after the baby is born anyways. Just some insight on why some people know but choose not to tell.
I live in the dee south and my family and friends wouldn’t do that. Stupid people can be anywhere.
@hayhay93 I've read that both boys and girls have the nub at this stage- it'll either turn into a penis or a clitoris later on. BUT there was someone on either this thread or the u/s thread who's tech or OB definitively said they saw a penis, so IDK anymore lol.
I was just thinking the same thing! I think it was @4deep if my memory is correct.
Yes my OB saw it. If it was a tech who had told me, I may be skeptical, but I trust my OB and her knowledge and know she’d never speak up if she weren’t confident. So, I too used to be a firm believer in all parts were the same this early, but not anymore. I guess only time will tell us for sure!
@4deep I agree that it depends on the people in your life and your specific community. I suppose I should've left my region out of it and merely said "in my community" because that was making too broad of a generalization. Thanks for calling me out on that. My friends and immediate family wouldn't react like that, but unfortunately I have a lot of extended family who might. People in my community are extremely into giving gendered baby items. Most women my moms age who are in our wider social circle, such as old family friends, have embroidery machines and iron on making machines. It is very common to receive many off registry items that have been monogrammed, embroidered, or had iron ons put on them. My moms best friend has a stack of ruffly diaper covers just waiting to be embroidered for anyone who has a girl. I was just trying to explain why someone might want to find out the sex of their baby but not tell other people. My best friend did that to avoid the onslaught of pink. Also, my decision to wait until birth to find out has been very unpopular with my family and friends, because everyone likes giving gendered items so much. So as far as people not caring what sex your baby is, I've found that to be very untrue. Everyone I've told has tried to convince me to find out the sex because they want to know. Just trying to explain a different community dynamic.
We just got the phone call!! We’re having a little girl! We are in COMPLETLE shock as we swore we were having a boy
Same! I told DH that I was "afraid" I was having a boy (and I wouldn't have been disappointed at all, I just grew up with a sister and not a brother, so would need to get used to the idea) but I got the call yesterday and we're having a girl! Makes the baby seem more "real" now, but maybe that's because I'm a ftm.
@beanship I got a lot of grief for not finding out my daughter's sex, too. Or a lot of weird looks, and some good-natured-that-I-could-tell-was-coming-from-real-frustration grief from my sisters. And everyone was happy to get me the gender neutral stuff I wanted even after we knew I was a girl, so that wasn't a motivator. I think people just want to know, and if you don't it garners grief.
@lavillard I did Sneak Peek. You send them a bit of your blood and they look at the dna. If it has any Y chromosome it’s a boy, if not it’s a girl. 99% accurate and a money back guarantee if they’re wrong. Mine said boy but my husband doesn’t believe it. Haha
@lavillard, I’m AMA, and was offered NIPT blood work to screen for Down’s and other things. You can also find out the sex of the baby as a bonus to that testing.
@lavillard I’m not sure why I was offered NIPT-maybe because twins? Or I just have good insurance? But that was able to tell me the sex of both babies when I did it at 10 or 11 weeks. Forget exactly when
I am not sure if they offer NIPT if you are not AMA or have a medical history that raises concerns. Depending on the state though, it may be covered regardless (I'm in California and it was fully covered)
Hi @sm05-2 , congrats on find out its a DD! please excuse my ignorance, is NIPT and NT the same thing? I looked both up but they stand for different things but I think it's sounds like the same screening? My NT is 01/09. I had no idea I may learn the gender so soon! How exciting!
@babybakie the basic NT scan and bloodwork I got does not include gender. I think the NIPT tests they are referring to are the more extensive tests like Panorama that are not normally standard.
Oh! Thanks for the clarification @amylu914 too bad. I got so excited. Being AMA i really want every test available. I will have to inquire about that at my next appointment.
@babybakie I would definitely check with your doctor and with your insurance because I know in some situations (like AMA) the more extensive testing that includes gender can be covered.
@stlmegs that gif is ACCURATE. These days when I get emails from my insurance or the lab I hold my breath. Thankfully so far we only had one WTF moment with my doctor in terms of billing, but should be all good now!
In my practice NIPT is the standard of care for all pregnancies not just for AMA or history of genetic issues. I think coverage depends on the insurance. I called mine today, found out it will be fully covered, went to get my blood draw, and will hopefully get the results soon!
I went through a lot to get the NIPT covered by my insurer - it required pre-approval, which was tough to get - but they did eventually cover it due to AMA. It's worth investigating.
Hi @sm05-2 , congrats on find out its a DD! please excuse my ignorance, is NIPT and NT the same thing? I looked both up but they stand for different things but I think it's sounds like the same screening? My NT is 01/09. I had no idea I may learn the gender so soon! How exciting!
Hi, @babybakie (and sorry for the late reply!). The NIPT (noninvasive prenatal test) is a blood test, and the NT ( (nuchal translucency) scan is an anatomy ultrasound scan that measures the thickness of fluid buildup at the back of the baby's neck (if the area is thicker than normal, it may be an early sign of Down syndrome, a trisomy, or other issues). Mind you, I'm not an expert, especially since I haven't had my NT screening/scan yet, but that's my understanding.
@sm05-2 thanks for the response! My appointment is on the 9th. I was told only that it is an NT, but they did mention I'd be getting a fingerprick of blood as well so maybe it's the NIPT too! I'd call and ask but I already called and changed my appointment time 3x so I feel silly calling again Lol. I cant wait to find out now!
I was informed yesterday at my appointment that the blood test where you can find out the sex of the baby is only offered if you are 35 and over. I'm in Orange County, CA and go through Kaiser Permenante. However, at the NT scan, which will be at 13 weeks for me, the tech MAY be able to see the sex because of how advanced their ultrasound machine is. (fingers crossed)
@zombiehoohaa yeah, I think that's just a California thing. I had my last in California and wasn't offered it on Blue Cross, but here in Colorado it's normal. Don't know why California's like that.
@kbernal2021mine was pretty accurate since they looked at chromosomes specifically for abnormalities, we did a little cake gender reveal but just for DH and I and we filmed it, it was so sweet and I love watching it over again:)
@babybakie hate to be the bearer of bad news but the finger prick is the standard complement to the NT scan and is not the same as the NIPT and won’t tell you gender. I did both separately and for the NIPT they took 2 vials of blood from my arm
In New Mexico, they offer all high-risk women and all women over 35 the NIPT, at least at the office I go to. My insurance only covers it if you’re over 35, but if you’re on Medicaid (which I am), they don’t even bill your insurance and give you the test for free.
@kbernal2021 I don't care for gender reveals myself, and we're just going to do a small surprise for my daughter. I am going to film it, though, and use that to announce what we're having.
@christycalifornia@zombiehoohaa that’s weird i had no issues with getting the sex blood work when i was in Cali. I’m not over 35, maybe it had to do with maybe my doc putting high risk? Not sure but they just told me if my insurance didn’t pay for it it’s still on option to do out of pocket for the extra testing. I never like KP and i wouldn’t be surprised if it was just another one of their own special rules.
Re: I’m just here for the SEX!
DS 11.8.12
Baby GIRL! due 7.4.18