January 2018 IVF

kristimh80 · December 2017

@KristoKekerooni Thanks for sharing your comparisons!! My RE has me set up to use MDR, but I'm going to ask if there is other options they are ok with.

efavell02 · December 2017

@KristoKekerooni thanks for that resource!

oh boy you guys, tonight was a doozy. Had the big talk with DH about how much we are paying cash vs how much in a loan for the guarantee program, and also got ready to ask his parents for an interest free loan tomorrow. We will see how that goes....

how are your DHs handling everything emotionally? I feel like I’ve been processing/grieving along the way and now I’m just ready to get the show on the road. But I think it’s all really hitting DH. He got so sad and cried tonight and I just sat there and held his hand, but felt so bad that I wasn’t feeling as sad as him. I think he’s just now going through the “why us?” thing.

beachbunnyxo123 · December 2017

@efavell02 I’m sorry to hear about the stress and emotions coming up. I feel like the acceptance piece is so tough when it comes to IVF especially with the frustration of not being able to do it the old fashion way and all the expenses that come along with it. We are OOP too and still don’t have exact numbers so it’s definitely anxiety provoking. I think my DH has been ready to get the show on the road but it’s been a little harder for me to practice acceptance than him. I think just providing support like you did and being there to talk about it is helpful. You talked about grieving before and there are stages of grief sounds like he’s at the last stage before acceptance. Hopefully after you get over the hurdles financially and have a plan the excitement will kick in for him

efavell02 · December 2017

Thanks @beachbunnyxo123

I think it was really emotional for him because it’s his parents we’ll be talking to and he really hates that we have to ask them for a loan. I mean, we’d be fine without an interest free loan, but obviously it would be nice to not be paying off a loan until the hypothetical kid is in kindergarten. I also think it’s hard for partners to watch their wives go through all this with their bodies. I think once we have the loan in place/have paid, we’ll be fine and excitement will kick in.

KristoKekerooni · December 2017

@efavell02 - Isn't it horrible when the H's really start to SEE it? For the longest time I resented how optimistic and carefree my H was. He was constantly saying "this month is it" even though we have been ttc now for over three years. It was infuriating. But somewhere along the way, his "when" became "if," and his optimism fizzled out. And wow, what I wouldn't give for him to be that annoying, optimistically happy guy again.

kristimh80 · December 2017

Speaking of cost of medication. Have you guys been on the thread asking about Overseas Meds? A girl I spoke with there swears by IVFmeds.com and saved her a ton of $$. I calculated things yesterday and it'll save up over $2k, so maybe worth it for those paying OOP. Hoping my RE is on board with this tomorrow!

kiwi2628 · December 2017

@efavell02 My husband is still trying to be the upbeat one since I am the one who just had so much trouble with our cycle being canceled, but I can tell it hurts him because he had some baby stuff pinned on his Amazon wishlist (he doesn't know I know about his wishlist) and today they are gone but not purchased. It literally breaks my heart.

kristimh80 · December 2017

@kiwi2628 Awe I'm so sorry

((hugs)) I always feel guilty because I'm the issue too and my DH is 1 of 6 and there are 12 grandkids. He's always commenting when watching tv and sees a baby "I want one". Makes it even worse.

efavell02 · December 2017

@kiwi2628 that IS heartbreaking! I’m so sorry. A cancelled cycle must be so hard; it’s own awful kind of loss. My husband and I tend to take turns who’s feeling down, so I guess at least we can be there for the other one when they are down. Kinda sounds like you and some of the others have that goin on too.

beachbunnyxo123 · December 2017

@kiwi2628 oh my gosh that is so sweet that he did that and sad to hear that he took it off. Im so sorry friend. really hoping that this different protocol is going to do great things for you!

hoffmanr7 · December 2017

@efavell02 It seems like DH is taking things pretty much in stride...as he has done this whole time. I know it gets him down sometimes.....but he is perpetually optimistic and easy going. Where as the "unexplained" diagnosis frustrates me beyond belief, I think it gives him the optimism that it is going to happen for us.

@kiwi2628 So sweet and so heartbreaking about your husbands amazon list

. I have a box in our guest closet that is filled with a few things here or there that I have collected since we started trying. DH always laughed at me when I brought something home.....but who knew when I would find the same things again?! Now they sit there and taunt me....especially a shirt I had bought for DH that says "The man behind the bump". I had always intended to give it to him as my way of telling him...no point in that now I guess. He doesn't know its there.

kiwi2628 · December 2017

@hoffmanr7 I am not letting IF steal everything from me. 2 1/2 years ago I bought a onesie with a bear on it (my H and I call each other bear). When I get my BFP, I am gonna surprise him with it, and thats how he is gonna find out

J1006 · December 2017

@efavell02. My husband has usually been the strong one when it comes to dealing with IF. When we got our originally MFI diagnosis I was a little worried. However, it was very factual about it and just wanted to take the steps to fix the issue and move on. After using donor sperm for four failed IUIs, my RE added an unexplained diagnosis to me. My husband mentioned to be at one point that he doesn’t feel as bad knowing it’s both of us not just him. I think he’s just good at hiding everything from me since I took everything kind of hard at the beginning of everything and after our failed IUIs.

We try try and look at it this way. What we are doing now is giving us the best chance we have ever had. If it’s meant to be then so be it. Someday we will have a family we just have to figure out how.

efavell02 · December 2017

@hoffmanr7 I have a draw with things like that too! I call it my Maybe Baby drawer.

We asked DH’sparents for a loan tonight. I got surprisingly emotional/cried and my father in law choked up too

They asked a lot of questions and said they would think about it. Overall it went fine, it was just emotional.

kristimh80 · December 2017

@efavell02 Hope everything works out!!

lablover78 · December 2017

Hi ladies! We signed all of our pw today and got our Rx for meds. I was the one asking about overseas meds un thrbpost on this board but it turns out RE has us use IVFmeds.com @hoffmanr7 is it too late to ask your RE if this is an option? My RE says it’s about 35 cents on the dollar. I’ll start stims on Jan 12th. I actually had another conversation with my friend and as long as things fall into place we are going to use her as a carrier. If not I’ll give it a try but I’m just not feeling super confident in my body & she says she feels really pulled to do this but wouldn’t consider it for a stranger so....I can’t help but feeling like the universe is providing me a gift I shouldn’t ignore. I’m going to hang out here until my ER and we know for sure who is going to cook our little embryo

lablover78 · December 2017

Also forgot to add @KristoKekerooni my DH’s attitude followed the exact same path! I would be so frustrated that he “didn’t get it” but then seeing him sad and discouraged made me feel so much worse.

hoffmanr7 · December 2017

@lablover78 Unfortunately that ship has sailed. Meds arrived yesterday. It would have been nice to save some money but I'm not going to sweat it too much thinking about what we may have been able to save. My grandfather is generously giving us an interest free loan for this whole process so that is helping to take some of the pressure off.

In other news...I don't know if it is because we're starting IVF, or because of the holidays or work (and all the baby talk that has been happening at work), or some combination of all of these things but I have been feeling a bit depressed lately. The last week or so I just have had this general "down" feeling. I have no motivation at work. I don't feel like I have any patience for the every day little annoyances (my fuse is super short lately). There are little breaks here and there. Last night DH and I did a game night which was fun...but this morning I'm right back to where I was before it. *siggggggh* I'm sure it will pass but I wish it would hurry.

KristoKekerooni · December 2017

@lablover78 I am using a combo of four different pharmacies. Three of those are overseas. Hoping to order in the next week, since they say it can take up to three weeks. Looks like we will start stims around the same time. I expect AF around the 11th of January.

@kiwi2628 - ugh. That BREAKS my heart. My older sis got KU after a few years of IF, and then randomly, my little sister got KU this summer out of nowhere (supposedly she was on BC)... Older sis was talking about giving her hand-me-downs, but offered them to us first, since my little sister is kinda flaky, and a lot of the clothes are sentimental. H immediately turned her down, saying there is no way to know if we will ever have kids. No sense in assuming we will. Breaks my damn heart. In a related story, Over the last 3+ years, I have bought various things to announce to H. A few I did use to announce (TW-and then lost them), and the others I just bought because they were on sale or whatever. H has slowly found every single one from where I had them hidden them, and hidden them all himself-from me. "So you don't have to look at them or know they are burning a hole somewhere"

kristimh80 · December 2017

@hoffmanr7 You aren't alone!! I have been so moody and short with people lately, especially at work. For me, AF should be here soon and I think my mind is elsewhere (thinking about IVF), so I don't have much tolerance for much. I snapped at a guy on Tuesday and about went off on a co-worker who is on her high horse right now lol We went for med teaching today, so think for me it's a combo of nerves and emotions just being all of the place. I'm super excited one minute and a basket case the next.

efavell02 · December 2017

I think the holidays heightens emotions too because there is a lot of sentimentality that’s wrapped up in it and it’s focused around families (which we are trying to create). I feel the same way as you guys.

Got word this morning that DHs parents are giving us an interest free loan! So happy we won’t be tied to an interest rate and payment plan with a loan company. With all my student loans, I was having a really hard time with the thought of taken on another debt like that.

Bababatty · December 2017

Hi all! Barring any big revelations from our second opinion RE at the beginning of January, I’ll be doing another IVF cycle with my current clinic starting around mid-January. I recognize a lot of you already from TTTC and TTGP (although I haven’t been active on there in ages).

Brief intro: I’m 34 and DH is 38. We’ve been trying for almost 2.5 years. Our primary diagnosis is MFI (low motility), although at our WTF appointment this week my RE did bring up the possibility of some egg quality issues but didn’t seem overly concerned. We did 6 IUIs over the course of the last year and moved onto IVF this summer. Our first IVF cycle this summer netted us 3 blasts. Our first fresh transfer in August failed and *TW* our FET in November ended in a CP. *end TW* We only have the one left and our RE indicated that he’d want to be more aggressive (i.e., transferring 2) going forward so we’re doing another IVF cycle. This will be a freeze-all with a FET in February. Currently debating if we want to do PGS because using my body as the test has not been fun to date.

My clinic doesn’t do BCP so I’ll launch in when AF comes, which I expect around January 14. Currently waiting to hear from the billing department on how much this will cost us because last time we were part of an NYS demonstration program that saved us a lot of money. The thread on overseas meds is very helpful, @lablover78, as is your spreadsheet @KristoKekerooni!

kristimh80 · December 2017

@Bababatty Welcome! I remember seeing you on here last Spring on the IUI / IVF boards. So sorry for everything you've had to go thru this year since then. Hopefully, the more aggressive treatment with your RE will be the key to things this month

If we have enough, we will also transfer 2 as well.

marfi236 · December 2017

So had my IVF consult with the doctor yesterday and we are all set to do IVF in January! We will be using the antagonist protocol and then will be using ICSI for fertilization (due to MFI). Found out yesterday that while our insurance will cover all the IVF related procedures (U/S, retrieval, ICSI, transfer, etc) they cover none of the medications so we are trying to figure out the most cost effective way to get those. I guess one benefit is not having the medications covered is we don't have to wait until the last minute to get them ordered (my coverage doesn't kick in until January 1 and we expect my cycle to start on January 7-8 so it will be cutting it super close to get the medications then).

We are hoping that we can do a fresh transfer but that depends on if I have any issues with OHSS (which is a possibility since I may have PCOS (all blood related tests came back normal but she wants to go into it using the assumption that I do rather than the assumption that I do not). If we do end up having to freeze the embryos we do a FET in February. If we do have to freeze we won't do PGS as my RE doesn't recommend doing them unless they are necessary (like if hubs and I were both carriers for the same thing which we aren't).

kristimh80 · December 2017

@marfi236 Yay!! We went yesterday for med teach and should start BC around the same time and also doing antagonist. Best of luck to you!! Glad to see someone that'll be on the same schedule of events

shortstack930 · December 2017

Hi ladies! Hope you don’t mind if I join in. I just intro’d on the board. After 5 failed IUIs we are jumping into IVF. I’m getting my saline sono this Tuesday and should hopefully start stims right around New Years for January ER and February FET.

@marfi236 my doctor is also worried about OHSS so I won’t be doing a fresh transfer either. Glad your consult went well!

J1006 · December 2017

Welcome @shortstack930 and @Bababatty!

We had our consent signing this week as well as Injection teaching. Just waiting for my insurance to make up their minds on whether or not they will cover Lupron. They immediately denied my Gonal-F and Menopur as well as my trigger shot, but are on the fence about my Lupron, which of course is the one I need soonest. They keep requesting more information from my RE for some reason. Hopefully they will make up their minds on Monday so I can get my meds ordered. Starting Lupron on the 19th and the rest on the 30th

I’m hopeful 2018 will bring us all that we wish for

kristimh80 · December 2017

@J1006 FX Monday is a good day and it all works out!! I also had med teaching this week. Lovely AF showed, so going to call the nurse Monday to see if it's possible to get started now also. I believe lab is closed some, so prob not.

Bought BC yesterday for the first time in years...kind of ironic to say the least lol

J1006 · December 2017

@kristimh80. It’s so strange that this is how it all starts. My brother in law was asking last night when things get started for us. I told him that I was on the pill now. He got a little upset and asked why I would do that now. Haha. I had to explain how everything works.

kristimh80 · December 2017

@J1006 It's definately mind-boggling! lol

lablover78 · December 2017

@marfi236 since we are all cash pay, my RE just had us order from FastIVF.com which is in Turkey (I’m in the US). Before I realized he used a certain overseas pharmacy I started a thread on this board asking for recommendations so check that out as well. It is a HUGE cost saver to order overseas. FastIVF was def fast. They got back to me immediately via email and the order was placed within 30 minutes. You can use credit cards. I ordered them on Friday and they are arriving on Tuesday. Good luck!

marfi236 · December 2017

@lablover78 Thanks so much for that info! I emailed my nurse this morning letting her know that we found that the meds aren't covered. I'll be in the office tomorrow for a saline U/S (followup for my septum removal) so I'm hoping I can meet with her then and we can discuss our options (and I can see if they are ok with me ordering meds from overseas (which they hopefully are!)

KristoKekerooni · December 2017

@Bababatty - long time no see, friend. Hope you are doing well.

KristoKekerooni · December 2017

Guys... please tell me there is a way around this. I asked my clinic to send a script to the pharmacies I've chosen, two are overseas. They said no. Because NY rules says they can't order from overseas pharmacies.

kristimh80 · December 2017

@KristoKekerooni Hopefully there is! Can you ask them to give you a copy of RX in case you want to use a different pharmacy? I doubt my clinic would let us either. I tried to see about using another pharmacy also and the nurse looked at me like I was silly.

marfi236 · December 2017

I just got a call from the pharmacy that my RE likes to go through (it's a local pharmacy) and the total cost for all my meds is going to be $1400. So we'll probably end up just going through them because it's right down the road from my RE (so we can just drive over there and pick it up after the baseline appointment). Now if this month can just hurry up!

Bababatty · December 2017

@KristoKekerooni Hello old friend! I’m so happy you’re able to do IVF in January. For some reason I recall from earlier this year you thought you’d need to wait an entire year before you could do it, so you were able to get started sooner?

As for the RX thing,I bet it has something to do with the mandated e-prescriptions in NYS, since I guess it’s technically illegal to order medications from overseas and thus the clinic would not be able to do that. I don’t know if the meds you’re looking for count as “compounding” (since some of them are mixed by us at home, but I’m not sure that’s the same thing), but there is an exemption to e-prescriptions for any doctor issuing a prescription for a substance that needs to be compounded for IM or subcutaneous administration. Maybe that’s your loophole because once you have a paper copy in hand you could go anywhere. https://www.health.ny.gov/professionals/narcotic/electronic_prescribing/docs/2016-03-16_blanket_waiver_letter.pdf

@kristimh80 Hi! I remember you from the IUI board, too! I’m sorry we are both still hanging out in IF-land, but I’m happy to be stimming with you in 2018.

kristimh80 · December 2017

@KristoKekerooni You got a steal if it's only $1400 (can't believe I'd think that was ever cheap). We will probably suck it up as well.

@Bababatty Hi there!! I thought I remembered you!! I'm happy to have you here with me too! We took a few months break from Summer till Nov to decide on our best route. Have you undergone IVF already or is this your 1st round?

KristoKekerooni · December 2017

See, the issue is, the cheapest I found it in the states is 6K. Overseas, I got it down to about 2K. I wonder if they will just give me a copy. I doubt it though. they seem to be a little weird.

J1006 · December 2017

@KristoKekerooni. Unfortunately if it’s a state law I think it would be hard to find a way around it. My RE has one pharmacy she uses and that’s it. We use Mandell and supposedly if they don’t have the lowest price they will refer It to another pharmacy. They are based in NJ so maybe see what their quote would be. I’m using Gonal F, Menopur, Lupron, and Pregnyl and my estimate was around $3,000

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