Hello, let me introduce myself first..
For the first 30 years of my life, everything was smooth and worry-free. I was my parents’ most beloved child, found my true love in college, and happily married him after graduation.
At work, I was my boss’s most valued employee. Whenever I was in charge of a project, colleagues would inevitably say, “Oh, then I’m totally at ease.” I was constantly named “Employee of the Year,” with generous bonuses every year.
Later, I started my own business. Within just three months, I had broken into the market and started making money. By the fifth month, I was earning twice my previous salary. Growth was steady month after month. Right when the business needed more hands, I serendipitously met an amazing partner, and the company reached a whole new level.
Really, it seemed like at every step, whatever I needed, a pair of hands would always place it right in front of me, just in time.
My Two Girls: Ellie & Mia
Meet Ellie, My Firstborn
In 2020, my husband and I decided to have a child. After trying for over a year, we finally got the news in 2021 that a little one was on the way. In 2022, we welcomed our first child, Ellie. She made me a mother.
She is utterly adorable—big eyes, rosy skin, chubby little hands. Every time I look at her, I can’t help but give her a kiss. She is pure joy, and I love her more each day.
But as a first-time mom, I faced unprecedented difficulties. The postpartum tearing wouldn’t heal, and the pain was excruciating. Clogged milk ducts made my breasts hard as rocks. The severe sleep deprivation… And what was even more crushing was that, with zero parenting experience, I was clueless when faced with her unexplained wailing, night terrors, refusal to nurse, constipation, diarrhea, fevers… I desperately searched online, longing for one accurate, truly useful answer!
It was during this time that I thought, once I make it through this “dark” path, I must leave a light on for other new moms.
And Then Came Mia
Ellie had just turned one when I got pregnant again. In 2024, we welcomed our second daughter, Mia.
Completely different from Ellie, Mia is a great eater and sleeper. Although she had her fussy moments in the first two months, starting almost from month three, she became super easygoing. She feeds on schedule, gradually sleeps through the night, loves her solid foods, and adapted quickly when I had to stop breastfeeding due to mastitis.
This made me realize just how vastly different babies can be! It made me even more determined to write about my experiences.
Why I Had to Start This Blog
The Catalyst: A Life Pivoted
After Mia was born, my business also began to decline sharply. I had no choice but to close it and become a full-time mom. My work no longer involves Excel and Word, but instead revolves around changing diapers, washing bottles, making baby food, and managing household chores…
This has been a monumental challenge for me. All my past achievements seem irrelevant now. Managing two young children has brought me a sense of frustration I’ve never known before.
The Daily Reality
They are always fighting over things. When one is in my arms, the other immediately demands to be held too. When I try to cook, Ellie wants me to read her a book. When I attempt to load the washing machine, Mia has a diaper blowout, and I must drop everything to change her…
By the time I finish all that, I see the cup of hot coffee on the table has gone cold again. And it’s not until evening that I remember, “Oh my goodness, the clothes are still in the hamper, unwashed!”
Of course, being a mom is filled with happiness, but that doesn’t negate how hard it is.
My Promise to You
Because I’ve walked this path myself, I won’t just tell you how joyful motherhood is, like many websites do. I want to share my real, unfiltered experiences so every new mom can find a “companion” here.
I want to tell you: you are not alone. What you’re going through, I’ve been there too. Your breakdowns, your helplessness, your moments of losing control—I’ve had them all. You don’t need to feel guilty. This is just a small, necessary stretch of the journey for every mom.
My Hope for This Space
I really want to share my parenting experiences—not just the warm, glowing moments, but to honestly document the pitfalls I’ve stumbled into, the tears I’ve shed, and the “survival wisdom” I’ve scraped together in utter exhaustion.
The Goal: A Mom’s Toolkit
I hope this blog becomes a “mom’s toolkit,” filled not with vague theories, but with:
- Practical Tips: Like how to quickly figure out why a baby is crying, tried-and-true methods for dealing with clogged ducts, or how to efficiently manage the daily grind with twins (or two under two) solo.
- Pitfall Avoidance Guides: Sharing the baby products I regret buying the most, and those “game-changer” parenting hacks. Letting you know which parenting anxieties you can let go of, and which principles are worth holding onto.
- A Community for Moms: I hope my stories connect me with more moms like you. We can cheer each other on in the comments, share our own tricks, turning the storms we face alone into a journey we walk together.
The Bigger Vision
My previous career taught me to analyze data, solve problems, and optimize processes. Now, I’m applying all those skills to this new “position” of Mom. I want to prove that a mom’s value is absolutely not confined to the home. The mindset, resilience, and creativity we built in our careers can shine just as brightly—perhaps even brighter—in this more complex, long-term “project” of raising humans, and can even be transformed into a force that helps others.
My hope is simple: that every mom who opens this blog can let out a sigh of relief and say, “So it’s not just me.” Then, she can find a bit of practical info, a dose of comforting solidarity, and return to her sweet, chaotic mom-life with a little more confidence and a little less weight on her shoulders.
This road? Let’s walk it together.
Re: TTCAL Check In Week of 8/14/17
CP 1/25/16 4.5 weeks, developed Graves' disease
1 - BD last night boo-yah! Dh is out of town tonight and comes back tomorrow night. I don't track but I sure as heck know when that fertile CM is revving up. Not going to lie but DH has nights where he is "sensitive" so doesn't last as long but I sure as hell don't care because he made his deposit in me ha!
3 - No Rants! We went to the outdoor community pool today. It was the last day it was open because school starts tomorrow. Summer break went fast this year! I'm so excited to get back to my normal routine now that DD will be in 1st grade. I own my own business so I haven't gotten as much things accomplished as I normally do to say the least.
4 - Fall is my favorite season but I dread what comes after it which is winter. We don't have too much planned before Labor Day. The eclipse is next Monday and our city falls right smack dab in totality which will last a couple minutes. Dh is a photographer and bought a special lens to take photos with.
@dpjennifer I'm so pumped for DragonCon...it'll be my first year and I'm going to rock so many GOT panels. And Buffy...and Harry Potter...and TWD....and on and on and on...
@justsuzie I just want to say how much I appreciate the amount of Buffy gifs you bring to this board. Also, I too occasionally watch GOT without my husband (he works nights) and I've gotten very good at feigning surprise at all the right monents!
@justsuzie Buffy gifs make me sad because like 6 years ago I re-watched the entire series on Netflix, and recently wanted to rewatch some of it... and it's no longer on there!?!?
MooFish2364
MC #1: D&C Oct 23, 2015 (7.5 weeks)
MC #2: July 1, 2016 (5.5 weeks)
MC #3: October 17, 2016 (CP)
RE #1: RPL testing November 2016-January 2017
MC #4: Feb. 28, 2017 (CP)
RE #2: Additional RPL testing March-November 2017
MC #5: January 2019 (6.5 weeks)
RE #3: More testing 2023.
Egg Retrieval Sept/Oct 2023, 2 good embryos after PGT-A testing.
Surgery for endometriosis January 2024
Lupron Depo March 2024. Benched 3 months.
FET #1: June 3, 2024 (failed)
Lupron Depo June 2024. Benched 3 months again before next FET.
FET #2: September 2024 (failed)
FET #3: December 2024 (failed)
#BitterHagPartyOf1
So my good friend that I know has struggled with fertility issues for years just informed me she had another loss. That's her 11th mc since 2013 with only one live birth. My heart was just crushed for her.
MC #1: D&C Oct 23, 2015 (7.5 weeks)
MC #2: July 1, 2016 (5.5 weeks)
MC #3: October 17, 2016 (CP)
RE #1: RPL testing November 2016-January 2017
MC #4: Feb. 28, 2017 (CP)
RE #2: Additional RPL testing March-November 2017
MC #5: January 2019 (6.5 weeks)
RE #3: More testing 2023.
Egg Retrieval Sept/Oct 2023, 2 good embryos after PGT-A testing.
Surgery for endometriosis January 2024
Lupron Depo March 2024. Benched 3 months.
FET #1: June 3, 2024 (failed)
Lupron Depo June 2024. Benched 3 months again before next FET.
FET #2: September 2024 (failed)
FET #3: December 2024 (failed)
#BitterHagPartyOf1
2. Status? Waiting oh so patiently on AF
3. R/R? I play world of warcraft like a big nerd
4. GTKY: With summer almost over what are some last minute plans you have before fall starts? Noooope, hoping to get pregnant before my insurance deductable resets
Edited for spelling errors
@rklinge0 We are headed to HAWAII on our vacation. Bucket list trip for us for sure. Cannot wait.
@justsuzie I have to say until I joined this board I didn't know that anyone besides me watched Buffy! It was one of those things that I never, NEVER spoke about! Not sure why, I just watched it obsessively alone like a creep! I also watched the show Angel when Buffy ended. I might be on my own on that one though!?
@vlagrl29 So I know everyone just loves Fall, but really, ALL I can think about is that WINTER IS COMING. I live up North though and winters can be brutal here though. I think I would be fine with it if I lived in sunny Cali or something. Sigh.
And HAWAII!!! That's awesome! It's been nothing but rain here for a week and some sand and sun would be amazing about now. Fall is already here for us.
Sitting right across from me in the tinny waiting room is a pg lady- probably right around where I should be had I not had my MC. I know I'm at an OB where pg women should be- but I usually get the first appointment of the day and avoid them- this just sucks. Ugh. I. Hate. This. I hate that we are all dealing with this shitty situation. Ok rant over.
I still have sooo much catching up to do on this weeks thread- you ladies have been chatty and I've been slow in keeping up!
Chin up lady, I hope your OB appointment goes well.
jchpg I hate going to the OB for that reason.
MC #1: D&C Oct 23, 2015 (7.5 weeks)
MC #2: July 1, 2016 (5.5 weeks)
MC #3: October 17, 2016 (CP)
RE #1: RPL testing November 2016-January 2017
MC #4: Feb. 28, 2017 (CP)
RE #2: Additional RPL testing March-November 2017
MC #5: January 2019 (6.5 weeks)
RE #3: More testing 2023.
Egg Retrieval Sept/Oct 2023, 2 good embryos after PGT-A testing.
Surgery for endometriosis January 2024
Lupron Depo March 2024. Benched 3 months.
FET #1: June 3, 2024 (failed)
Lupron Depo June 2024. Benched 3 months again before next FET.
FET #2: September 2024 (failed)
FET #3: December 2024 (failed)
#BitterHagPartyOf1
@ELeighMay - holy crap 11 losses! I don't even want another one. That's absolutely horrible. I can see why she would be done.
@jchpg I know how you feel. When I went into my ob office for mY D&C, I had to sit in the waiting room surrounded by pregnant women. That was really rough. Stay strong, you'll be one of those pg ladies soon!
On a lighter note, my step-dad (or dad) has discovered Pinterest. Anyone have older parents who have discovered Pinterest? I'm seriously dying just picturing him sitting in his old man jammies, bifocals, and slippers on the couch scrolling through Pinterest. He text me this morning to say that he found some really cool wedding reception decoration ideas and will be creating the stick flower holders (pictured) and a s'mores bar for the event next week.
@vlagrl29 we are doing Kauai and Maui for our 10 yr anniversary! If you have any Kauai suggestions on must do activities I will take them!
@dpjennifer it sucks because my cousin's fiancé was a month ahead of me. So every time I see milestone pics of her baby I think of what should have been for me.
@ELeighMay so sorry for your friend. I can't even imagine that many losses.
@jchpg I know what you mean. There was a very pregnant lady at my RE's office a few weeks ago. It early sucked but then made me hopeful because she was stopping by because he helped her get pregnant and her OB is next door. I just hope one day I can walk in with a big ol belly and thank him.
@vlagrl29 I don't mind winter in Dec but then I'm over it!!
@mrschx Hawaii sounds great!!!
MC #1: D&C Oct 23, 2015 (7.5 weeks)
MC #2: July 1, 2016 (5.5 weeks)
MC #3: October 17, 2016 (CP)
RE #1: RPL testing November 2016-January 2017
MC #4: Feb. 28, 2017 (CP)
RE #2: Additional RPL testing March-November 2017
MC #5: January 2019 (6.5 weeks)
RE #3: More testing 2023.
Egg Retrieval Sept/Oct 2023, 2 good embryos after PGT-A testing.
Surgery for endometriosis January 2024
Lupron Depo March 2024. Benched 3 months.
FET #1: June 3, 2024 (failed)
Lupron Depo June 2024. Benched 3 months again before next FET.
FET #2: September 2024 (failed)
FET #3: December 2024 (failed)
#BitterHagPartyOf1