Do you have any questions for STM+(s)?

selahluna · July 2017

We have a STM+ check-in, but I was curious to ask: does anyone have any questions to ask our community of STMs? We are here to give support and help as we can. Have a happy weekend!

wal2017 · July 2017

Thank you for this! Great idea.

STMs- did anyone use the dock a tot for their first baby? I hear great things online but it looks a bit pricey for what boils down to an inflated baby sized raft.

does anyone do cloth diapers and if so do you think they are time consuming? (Emptying/ cleaning/ laundering is obviously more of a process than just tossing out a dirty diaper. But is it annoyingly time consuming?)

soulcupcake · July 2017

wal2017 said:

Thank you for this! Great idea.

STMs- did anyone use the dock a tot for their first baby? I hear great things online but it looks a bit pricey for what boils down to an inflated baby sized raft.

does anyone do cloth diapers and if so do you think they are time consuming? (Emptying/ cleaning/ laundering is obviously more of a process than just tossing out a dirty diaper. But is it annoyingly time consuming?)

DockATot wasn't on the market with I had my first (or last, I don't think), but it's something I'm considering using this time.

I used cloth with my older three kids. I didn't think it was too time consuming. I really liked it, and was probably cloth diaper obsessed (it's easy to get carried away) for a period of time. We didn't use cloth with dd3 because the W/D is shared by four condo units, and it seemed like too much of a hassle. We've considered getting a ventless W/D combo in the future, and in that case we may use cloth again.

If you want more info/support/resources, diaperswappers is a good site.

mblomq2 · July 2017

I was also wondering about cloth diapers so that's great.

STM's-

what was one of the most challenging things about pregnancy for you?

what was one of the most joyful?

mbirdie · July 2017

We use cloth diapers with DD. I don't find it time consuming. An extra load of laundry ever few days is not bad, plus it's nice to never have to run out for a pack of diapers. We will be reusing the diapers for this next baby and will definitely be saving money.

mpp06 · July 2017

We just started cloth diapering and I'm surprisingly loving it! I didn't start until baby number 5 and he's already over a year, but I figured with this baby maybe I'd save a little! I can't wait to find out if it's a boy or girl to buy more prints!

lolapop2005 · July 2017

The most challenging for me, especially in the first trimester is the exhaustion and/or ms. You can't just rest or take it easy when you have other kids at home, or at least do it without guilt, lol. But then again, if your a working ftm to be, then I guess you can't really rest enough anyway. I'm preparing to be a 3tm and so far that's my biggest struggle. Oh, and the crazy emotional roller coaster! My poor kiddos and dh, I'm a bit unhinged at times, haha! The most joyful is finally showing and feeling baby. For me, I have always felt the most beautiful when pregnant. It's cliche, but it really is such an amazing time and experience to go through. My first pregnancy came after ttc for almost five years and being dx'ed with pcos. Then the baby was dx'ed with spina bifida at the anatomy scan. So it really gave me a deeper appreciation for it all. My second baby, who was completely healthy and an easy pregnancy was amazing.

selahluna · July 2017

@wal2017- I have cloth diapered my first two and plan to with this one as well. It's intimidating at first- there's so much to read! But I loveeeee it and it has saved us lots of money (especially with getting to reuse over multiple children). I don't find the laundering difficult or a hassle at all. It's my last load of laundry every night. Easy peasy! I use prefold diapers (what you think of as traditional dipes) and love them.

Most challenging thing? Making sure to take time to meditate and relax. The time goes by so so quickly!

i agree with @lolapop2005. I always feel the most beautiful when pregnant, which is a fun boost to have. And there's nothing like that moment when your baby is born. Our first was completely unassisted, natural and magical. Our second was emergency section under general- so I missed everything, as did my husband. But birth? It's the sweetest thing.

winnie1122 · July 2017

As far as the Dockatot question, I don't have one, but I will say that I wouldn't buy anything crazy expensive until the baby is here and you find yourself wishing you had something like that. Unless someone wants to buy it for you or you have lots to spend. A lot of the larger gadgets we had only ended up getting used a handful of times and if I had bought them myself I probably would have been kicking myself a little. They were shower gifts, so it wasn't as big of a deal but still. The most expensive items on my registry (that thankfully I didn't get) I never would have really used in the end. I remember a nifty steam sterilizer thing and a couple other fancy gadgets, yeah never would have used them. The basics are best until baby gets here and you know what kind of baby you have! IMO

Hardest part of pregnancy: morning sickness, waiting for scans, and the hip pain at the end.

Best part: all the milestones and of course, the birth. Birth is hands down the most incredible experience of my life. Epidural was a pretty great thing too

msunshine123 · July 2017

I don't have a Dockatot. Just used a bassinet and will again.

I agree with other moms - the morning sickness and other pregnancy symptoms are the most challenging. The best like other posters would be hitting the milestones, having your baby in your arms and bringing your baby home.

the_other_mother · July 2017

The most challenging part of pregnancy for me was the sickness. Count your blessings if you only have the occasional, passing nausea.

The best part is when you start to feel baby move, and the connection you feel to someone you've never even met.

I cloth diaper like 25ish% of the time. The reason I don't do it more isn't because it's a huge inconvenience, I'm honestly just kinda lazy. The laundry isn't bad, and I started using disposable liners when DD started on solids so I just flush the poop. I use pocket diapers and used a few AIOs when she was a newborn.

magnolia305 · July 2017

winnie1122 said:

As far as the Dockatot question, I don't have one, but I will say that I wouldn't buy anything crazy expensive until the baby is here and you find yourself wishing you had something like that. Unless someone wants to buy it for you or you have lots to spend. A lot of the larger gadgets we had only ended up getting used a handful of times and if I had bought them myself I probably would have been kicking myself a little. They were shower gifts, so it wasn't as big of a deal but still. The most expensive items on my registry (that thankfully I didn't get) I never would have really used in the end. I remember a nifty steam sterilizer thing and a couple other fancy gadgets, yeah never would have used them. The basics are best until baby gets here and you know what kind of baby you have! IMO

Hardest part of pregnancy: morning sickness, waiting for scans, and the hip pain at the end.

Best part: all the milestones and of course, the birth. Birth is hands down the most incredible experience of my life. Epidural was a pretty great thing too

So much of this. All of it.

Don't buy the "fluff" stuff. It is fine to put on your registry--but even then, you have to store it all. I remember thinking how great the baby brezza would be, but I am glad I never got it. When it gets closer to registry time--we should start a thread just about things to get/avoid.

Hardest Part of pregnancy--first tri. The waiting, m/s, and keeping it a secret!

Best Part: Holding that baby for the first time. Your heart will feel like it is going to explode. Best feeling ever.

marissajc · July 2017

mblomq2 said:

STM's-

what was one of the most challenging things about pregnancy for you?

what was one of the most joyful?

One of the most challenging things for me was the pelvic pain! DD sat super low almost the entire time - I was so achey like someone had kicked me right in my vag for months. Epsom salt baths really helped, but it was a struggle.

That said, one of the most joyful things was feeling her roll around or feeling hiccups. Even when she would kick my ribs, it always made me smile to think "I grew this little human!!" All the pain in the world would never make me regret carrying her!

meatballs37 · July 2017

mblomq2 said:

I was also wondering about cloth diapers so that's great.

STM's-

what was one of the most challenging things about pregnancy for you?

what was one of the most joyful?

My most challenging was the last month of pregnancy. I was very very swollen and working full time. DD was an August baby.

The most joyful part of pregnancy was feeling her move. It felt like our own special bond that I got before anyone else met her or held her.

meatballs37 · July 2017

We had a dock a tot for DD. I agree with PP. I would wait to get any gadgets that are extra until your LO arrives. Our DD had HORRIBLE colic. And the dock a tot saved our lives when we transitioned her to her crib. We also bought a mamroo swing and she really didn't care for it. That was kind of a large unnecessary expense. I am hoping we get use out of it this next time.

SquirrelsRWatching · July 2017

My son slept in the mamaroo for the first 3 months. He didn't take to the crib for a while.

The hardest thing about pregnancy is coping with the myriad of symptoms, especially the nausea in the first tri (24/7) and the restless legs I had third tri. The wait is also hard! The days seem to tick by slowly when you're pregnant... but I thought that the first tone around and now he's 2.

The best part was seeing my husband as I've never seen him before: as a wonderful father. He had no kid experience before his son and was a pro in no time! My husband isn't the touchy, feely kind of person, but he was everything I needed him to be during labor and delivery.

SquirrelsRWatching · July 2017

Sorry for a second post, but I had to look up dock a tot... They weren't on the market when I was pregnant in 2014. I Had something similar my mom bought at tru for $25, which seems like a more reasonable price for what it is. It was the only way I could get ds to sleep in his crib... He needed to feel contained.

catherinekate · July 2017

Co-signed on all the advice to wait and see before splurging on expensive items. It's actually ridiculous how quickly stuff accumulates and then you will feel compelled to keep it all in case you have another child. Buy everything you can used or on sale. You will also get presents beyond your shower--when people cold over to meet your baby, holidays, and just because gifts. So many things I thought were necessities we have barely used. One tip that I've lived by is having enough towers, sheets, change pad covers and clothes that you have to do minimal laundry. I only do laundry every week-ten days because I hate folding and I'd rather do all the laundry on one day. Do not buy blankets no matter how cute! You will get so many! We easily have 20-30.

catherinekate · July 2017

Also I do have a friend who lives and swears by the dock-a-tot but personally I would never spend that, nor do I think it's that useful. You can roll blankets and pillows around them if you need to leave them somewhere and then when they can move and roll, it would just be a game to escape it.

winnie1122 · July 2017

Ok moms of 2under2 (or just moms who had their second with a toddler at home)... what are the biggest adjustments you experienced and what purchases did you need to make to accommodate baby number 2 that you didn't already have? I'm looking at double strollers to fit the car seat we already have, but I feel like I won't need to buy much else? What am I not thinking of? DS will be about a year and a half when LO is born (20mo).

catherinekate · July 2017

@winnie1122 Thanks for asking that! My daughter will be 19 months when our next is born and I similarly feel like I don't need anything but a second high chair and a rumble seat for our stroller.

jessilee15 · July 2017

I really didn't buy much for my second son - it helped having 2 of the same sex only 26 months apart. Older one moved to a big boy bed and a booster seat to free up the crib and high chair. New pacifiers, new paci clips, new nipples for bottles, new pump parts, a baby book, and a few new clothes and a special blanket were about it. I needed more clothes than I had originally thought because I went from a big August baby to a peanut November baby, so the seasons didn't match up well on the clothes. I waited to get a double stroller because I didn't want two, and I couldn't decide if I wanted a jogger or a lighter weight/cheaper model. I mostly wound up just using a baby carrier and a single stroller, eventually got a double jogger (love it for it's comfortable ride, but my sons are so heavy I really can't jog with it well)

seltzerinstead · July 2017

I'm 8w today, will be ftm, and everything I'm reading on this forum is making me really dread the next 4 weeks! I've been super tired but not real nauseous yet - when was the peak of the awful first trimester and when did you start feeling better? Were any of you able to exercise all the way thru the first tri?

meatballs37 · July 2017

seltzerinstead said:

I'm 8w today, will be ftm, and everything I'm reading on this forum is making me really dread the next 4 weeks! I've been super tired but not real nauseous yet - when was the peak of the awful first trimester and when did you start feeling better? Were any of you able to exercise all the way thru the first tri?

I started feeling awful almost right away with my last pregnancy and it lasted until week 13-14. If you aren't nauseous yet, you might be one of the lucky ones who skip it. #jealous

SquirrelsRWatching · July 2017

seltzerinstead said:

I'm 8w today, will be ftm, and everything I'm reading on this forum is making me really dread the next 4 weeks! I've been super tired but not real nauseous yet - when was the peak of the awful first trimester and when did you start feeling better? Were any of you able to exercise all the way thru the first tri?

My nausea started on week 6, and with my last pregnancy stopped at week 14. You may be a lucky one that won't get nauseous. All exercise and healthy eating for me is out the window right now. I just started on Diclegis Friday and am feeling so much better, but the food aversions haven't gone away nor has my fatigue.

sabriel1 · July 2017

My LOs are all 15 - 16 months apart so we did have to buy a new crib for the new baby. A double stroller and a baby carrier as well as I needed to carry the second one a lot more than the first because I was always on the go.
Other things I would wait until baby is here. We ended up getting a lot of use out of a pop up tent and go pick because e were always outside and going to activities with the older kids/kid

kbrinks2 · July 2017

seltzerinstead said:

I'm 8w today, will be ftm, and everything I'm reading on this forum is making me really dread the next 4 weeks! I've been super tired but not real nauseous yet - when was the peak of the awful first trimester and when did you start feeling better? Were any of you able to exercise all the way thru the first tri?

My nausea started at week 6 with my first and last until week 16! I generally got sick in the morning and I was good to go for the rest of the day! I continued walking during the 1st trimester (usually 5-10K three or four days a week and played hockey twice a week until I was 12 weeks along. I found once I actually started the exercise it made it a bit easier!

Starynightsky24 · July 2017

seltzerinstead said:

I'm 8w today, will be ftm, and everything I'm reading on this forum is making me really dread the next 4 weeks! I've been super tired but not real nauseous yet - when was the peak of the awful first trimester and when did you start feeling better? Were any of you able to exercise all the way thru the first tri?

I have not been nauseous at all for all three of my pregnancies. I have waves when I'm hungry but that's all

. FX it's the same for you!

soulcupcake · July 2017

seltzerinstead said:

I'm 8w today, will be ftm, and everything I'm reading on this forum is making me really dread the next 4 weeks! I've been super tired but not real nauseous yet - when was the peak of the awful first trimester and when did you start feeling better? Were any of you able to exercise all the way thru the first tri?

I didn't experience nausea or morning sickness during my first, second and fourth pregnancies. My first two were pretty much identical, and my fourth was very similar, just more exhaustion/fatigue since I was 5+ months postpartum when I was pregnant with him. I definitely experienced nausea during my third pregnancy. It started at 6 weeks, and I continued to feel like crap, under the weather, until 21 weeks. But that pregnancy was off to me from the start. It just felt different. I only threw up a few times, the last time at, like, 34 weeks, but felt really queasy and had strong food aversion throughout a good portion of my pregnancy.

The on/off queasiness started at 6 weeks with my fifth, but it wasn't ongoing. It subsided by 12ish weeks, maybe. I dealt with headaches more often than queasiness with her. This pregnancy is similar to my last. No full blown nausea or morning sickness, but queasiness and an unsettled feeling usually starting late afternoon. No headaches at this point.

GoogleMD · July 2017

If you are not nauseous yet you may be a lucky one. Symptoms usually show up between 6-8 weeks.
I was super lucky last and was nauseous the entire 38w1d I was pregnant, and puked daily for the first 24 weeks

julievdm12 · July 2017

seltzerinstead said:

I'm 8w today, will be ftm, and everything I'm reading on this forum is making me really dread the next 4 weeks! I've been super tired but not real nauseous yet - when was the peak of the awful first trimester and when did you start feeling better? Were any of you able to exercise all the way thru the first tri?

I'm a third time mom and almost 9 weeks with only mild nausea that comes and goes. Other than the exhaustion and cramping, that's it for pregnancy symptoms for me with all 3 pregnancies.
Hopefully you are lucky and don't get sick.

ladybug0088 · July 2017

STM here too and I've been exhausted and also having mild cramping, but haven't experienced morning sickness with either pregnancy, thank goodness!

TattoosandLace · July 2017

Popping in to say that my PMs are always open. As a SAHM/Farm wife to a 2 year old and a 1 year old, I don't always have the easiest time keeping up with all the boards. Most of the things I would say to these questions so far have already been said.

kahlya88 · July 2017

STM here, no dockatot for me.. I did debate the idea but used a bassinet instead.
Hardest part has to be the ms, and pains. I had round ligament pain and sciatica.
Best thing is feeling the babes move/hiccup. The bond and piece of mind it brings is amazing.

clc515 · July 2017

So for you STMs who did have nausea and other symptoms in the first tri, and then they went away... did that make you nervous? Like, having the symptoms is kind of calming for me because it seems like baby is still cooking away in there lol.

neener*neener* · July 2017

clc515 said:

So for you STMs who did have nausea and other symptoms in the first tri, and then they went away... did that make you nervous? Like, having the symptoms is kind of calming for me because it seems like baby is still cooking away in there lol.

Yes, first tri had always been hard for me. Waiting for appointments, nausea, second guessing myself etc... once I felt my babies kick/ move that was reassurance every day and made it seem more "real".

I felt my kids kick around 16 weeks and started to show at 24 wks. More than just looking bloated or heavier than normal.

SquirrelsRWatching · July 2017

clc515 said:

So for you STMs who did have nausea and other symptoms in the first tri, and then they went away... did that make you nervous? Like, having the symptoms is kind of calming for me because it seems like baby is still cooking away in there lol.

ETA: I hate mobile bumping. Now I'm stuck in a box.

I didn't worry when my symptoms tapered off at the 2nd tri. It's normal for them to. Plus your loss risk also drops.

gymmonkey95 · July 2017

For me the hardest part of pregnancy was having GD and heartburn like no other! The most joyful was when she kicked right before my husband left for 6 months due to work.

Like others said you can definitely use rolled up blankets or pillows to barricade baby!

winnie1122 · July 2017

clc515 said:

So for you STMs who did have nausea and other symptoms in the first tri, and then they went away... did that make you nervous? Like, having the symptoms is kind of calming for me because it seems like baby is still cooking away in there lol.

Nah, by then it was a relief to have a break from morning sickness finally and I had a couple healthy US under my belt. Plus, it's not too long before you start to show and feel the baby move, so there are still enough pregnancy feelings going on! Though I don't think my first tri symptoms just totally disappeared, they slowly tapered off and changed during the beginning of 2nd tri. So there wasn't a gap where I just all of the sudden felt totally normal and not pregnant. Of course there are risks always, but they are significantly less after 13 weeks.

noodles15 · July 2017

winnie1122 said:

Ok moms of 2under2 (or just moms who had their second with a toddler at home)... what are the biggest adjustments you experienced and what purchases did you need to make to accommodate baby number 2 that you didn't already have? I'm looking at double strollers to fit the car seat we already have, but I feel like I won't need to buy much else? What am I not thinking of? DS will be about a year and a half when LO is born (20mo).

I had 2 under 2. My middle child was 18ish months when number 3 was born. I also have a 8 year old. Had to buy a minivan which I actually love. I bought a used Honda and it's been great. We also live in a district where K-4 walk to school so we walk my eldest to and from. We have pretty uneven sidewalks and I started with a front/back baby trend double and it was no good. It got stuck on every bump. Searched Facebook groups until I found a used Mountain Buggy Urban Jungle side by side and it is awesome. Can push it up a hill one handed if I want too and it fits through all standard door ways. Those were really the only things I had to purchase. My two youngest are boys and they can already share some clothes.

My biggest adjustment was dealing with my middles jealousy. He is still jealous but getting better. He even probably gets the most of my attention but we keep working on it. He couldn't be left for one second with the baby initially even if the baby was in a rock and play. So lots of baby wearing! Even now they still don't share their room cause he will hop in the crib with his brother. This is probably more individual based though depending on your kid. We have all survived and no one has been injured and here we are having another so the joy still outweighs the stress!

noodles15 · July 2017

seltzerinstead said:

I'm 8w today, will be ftm, and everything I'm reading on this forum is making me really dread the next 4 weeks! I've been super tired but not real nauseous yet - when was the peak of the awful first trimester and when did you start feeling better? Were any of you able to exercise all the way thru the first tri?

Fourth time Mom here and was one of the very lucky ones to have no morning sickness with any of my pregnancies. So far have had a few moments of nausea with this one but nothing intense. My pregnancies have been so uneventful in the first tri that I could literally forget that I am pregnant minus all of the worry that comes from having no symptoms.

I pay for it later thiugh with massive heartburn---so so bad. And yes all of my kids have had full heads of thick hair.

Want a personalized experience?

Do you have any questions for STM+(s)?

Re: Do you have any questions for STM+(s)?

Choose Another Board

Search Boards