Hello, let me introduce myself first..
For the first 30 years of my life, everything was smooth and worry-free. I was my parents’ most beloved child, found my true love in college, and happily married him after graduation.
At work, I was my boss’s most valued employee. Whenever I was in charge of a project, colleagues would inevitably say, “Oh, then I’m totally at ease.” I was constantly named “Employee of the Year,” with generous bonuses every year.
Later, I started my own business. Within just three months, I had broken into the market and started making money. By the fifth month, I was earning twice my previous salary. Growth was steady month after month. Right when the business needed more hands, I serendipitously met an amazing partner, and the company reached a whole new level.
Really, it seemed like at every step, whatever I needed, a pair of hands would always place it right in front of me, just in time.
My Two Girls: Ellie & Mia
Meet Ellie, My Firstborn
In 2020, my husband and I decided to have a child. After trying for over a year, we finally got the news in 2021 that a little one was on the way. In 2022, we welcomed our first child, Ellie. She made me a mother.
She is utterly adorable—big eyes, rosy skin, chubby little hands. Every time I look at her, I can’t help but give her a kiss. She is pure joy, and I love her more each day.
But as a first-time mom, I faced unprecedented difficulties. The postpartum tearing wouldn’t heal, and the pain was excruciating. Clogged milk ducts made my breasts hard as rocks. The severe sleep deprivation… And what was even more crushing was that, with zero parenting experience, I was clueless when faced with her unexplained wailing, night terrors, refusal to nurse, constipation, diarrhea, fevers… I desperately searched online, longing for one accurate, truly useful answer!
It was during this time that I thought, once I make it through this “dark” path, I must leave a light on for other new moms.
And Then Came Mia
Ellie had just turned one when I got pregnant again. In 2024, we welcomed our second daughter, Mia.
Completely different from Ellie, Mia is a great eater and sleeper. Although she had her fussy moments in the first two months, starting almost from month three, she became super easygoing. She feeds on schedule, gradually sleeps through the night, loves her solid foods, and adapted quickly when I had to stop breastfeeding due to mastitis.
This made me realize just how vastly different babies can be! It made me even more determined to write about my experiences.
Why I Had to Start This Blog
The Catalyst: A Life Pivoted
After Mia was born, my business also began to decline sharply. I had no choice but to close it and become a full-time mom. My work no longer involves Excel and Word, but instead revolves around changing diapers, washing bottles, making baby food, and managing household chores…
This has been a monumental challenge for me. All my past achievements seem irrelevant now. Managing two young children has brought me a sense of frustration I’ve never known before.
The Daily Reality
They are always fighting over things. When one is in my arms, the other immediately demands to be held too. When I try to cook, Ellie wants me to read her a book. When I attempt to load the washing machine, Mia has a diaper blowout, and I must drop everything to change her…
By the time I finish all that, I see the cup of hot coffee on the table has gone cold again. And it’s not until evening that I remember, “Oh my goodness, the clothes are still in the hamper, unwashed!”
Of course, being a mom is filled with happiness, but that doesn’t negate how hard it is.
My Promise to You
Because I’ve walked this path myself, I won’t just tell you how joyful motherhood is, like many websites do. I want to share my real, unfiltered experiences so every new mom can find a “companion” here.
I want to tell you: you are not alone. What you’re going through, I’ve been there too. Your breakdowns, your helplessness, your moments of losing control—I’ve had them all. You don’t need to feel guilty. This is just a small, necessary stretch of the journey for every mom.
My Hope for This Space
I really want to share my parenting experiences—not just the warm, glowing moments, but to honestly document the pitfalls I’ve stumbled into, the tears I’ve shed, and the “survival wisdom” I’ve scraped together in utter exhaustion.
The Goal: A Mom’s Toolkit
I hope this blog becomes a “mom’s toolkit,” filled not with vague theories, but with:
- Practical Tips: Like how to quickly figure out why a baby is crying, tried-and-true methods for dealing with clogged ducts, or how to efficiently manage the daily grind with twins (or two under two) solo.
- Pitfall Avoidance Guides: Sharing the baby products I regret buying the most, and those “game-changer” parenting hacks. Letting you know which parenting anxieties you can let go of, and which principles are worth holding onto.
- A Community for Moms: I hope my stories connect me with more moms like you. We can cheer each other on in the comments, share our own tricks, turning the storms we face alone into a journey we walk together.
The Bigger Vision
My previous career taught me to analyze data, solve problems, and optimize processes. Now, I’m applying all those skills to this new “position” of Mom. I want to prove that a mom’s value is absolutely not confined to the home. The mindset, resilience, and creativity we built in our careers can shine just as brightly—perhaps even brighter—in this more complex, long-term “project” of raising humans, and can even be transformed into a force that helps others.
My hope is simple: that every mom who opens this blog can let out a sigh of relief and say, “So it’s not just me.” Then, she can find a bit of practical info, a dose of comforting solidarity, and return to her sweet, chaotic mom-life with a little more confidence and a little less weight on her shoulders.
This road? Let’s walk it together.
Re: TTC over 35::Weekly Check in 5/1
TW:
HSG/FSH/AMH/E2/SA all normal DX: unexplained IF
spontaneous BFP 01/01/2017- Alexander was born sleeping 04/13/2017 at 19w1d ic/chorio
September 2017 HSG #2 & Gonal-F/Femara/Ovidrel/IUI #1 = ep (Salpingectomy of left fallopian tube)
spontaneous BFP 01/02/2018 EDD Aug 30th It's a GIRL!
Cerclage placed on 03/02
Oh my goodness ladies. I had betas done because I was supposed to get my period with the estrogen I was taking. Nurse called. I'm pregnant. HCG is really low at 12. Have another beta on Monday. Nurse said progesterone is at 10. I'm 12dpo. I just can't believe it. Oh my goodness.
Me: 36 DH:35
Married: 7/10/2016
TTC#1 - May 2016
BFP 9/6/2016 - Missed MC 10/20/2016
BFP 5/5/2017 - CP
IVF #1 - June 2017 - Transferred 1 fresh 4 AA embryo. 7/9 Beta #1 - 161
@vlagrl29 I know what you mean I eat healthy workout all my tests came out Normal only thing is I have low reserves. I didnt think 37 was that old.
@Labluver2 - how do they test your egg reserves? Is that in the CD3 blood testing?
I get my progesterone checked next Friday as long as its over 10 we are good.
So my OB told me that if Prog is taken at any time before the egg is actually release it could hinder conceiving - I was like screw that! The last thing I need is to so carefully track my O and then worry and stress that I'm taking the suppositories at the exact right time. It was too stressful for me so this current cycle I'm in is the first one in a while that I feel myself again - mentally. My 7dpo at 2 months after my loss was at a 9. He told me that he wouldn't worry about it unless it was at a 5 or 6. Also I have a living child so it was probably at a 9 back then too and I didn't know it because it only took us 1 month to conceive her so no need to worry about testing fertility. He did say we would check it again when I do get pregnant to be on the safe side. Also I got pregnant a 2nd time with our loss so I don't think progesterone is my issue. Apparently it's not the right time yet.
My husband keeps yelling at me to lay down and take it easy but then I start over thinking things.
June 2016 - CP
2017 - Medicated Cycles & IUI's
IVF w/ PGS - January 2018
FET #1 - April 2018 - BFN
ERA Cycle May / June 2018
ERA Biopsy June 2018 ~ Results: receptive (no change)
FET #2 - July 2018 - BFP
U/S #1 7wk1d - HB 144 U/S #2 9w1d HB 166
Anatomy Scan 1st 11/2/18 2nd AS 11/19
EDD March 28, 2019
Baby Girl born 3/26/19
June 2016 - CP
2017 - Medicated Cycles & IUI's
IVF w/ PGS - January 2018
FET #1 - April 2018 - BFN
ERA Cycle May / June 2018
ERA Biopsy June 2018 ~ Results: receptive (no change)
FET #2 - July 2018 - BFP
U/S #1 7wk1d - HB 144 U/S #2 9w1d HB 166
Anatomy Scan 1st 11/2/18 2nd AS 11/19
EDD March 28, 2019
Baby Girl born 3/26/19
Same here @labluver I'm my mom's only hope, my husband is 1 of 6 kids, so he almost doesn't like speaking to his parents lately because they always want to brag about their grandkids.
June 2016 - CP
2017 - Medicated Cycles & IUI's
IVF w/ PGS - January 2018
FET #1 - April 2018 - BFN
ERA Cycle May / June 2018
ERA Biopsy June 2018 ~ Results: receptive (no change)
FET #2 - July 2018 - BFP
U/S #1 7wk1d - HB 144 U/S #2 9w1d HB 166
Anatomy Scan 1st 11/2/18 2nd AS 11/19
EDD March 28, 2019
Baby Girl born 3/26/19
supposed to call RE tomorrow if no AF.
@vlagrl29 sorry about the bloating. Like AF isn't bad enough we have to deal with that too.
BFP#1 10/21/11 EDD 06/22/12 natural m/c 11/03/11 6w6d
BFP#2 03/08/12 EDD 11/19/12 met our sweet boy @ 36w5d! 10/25/12!
Are your cycles suddenly longer than normal? This cycle I just had came in at a 29 day and since the loss it's been 31 days. Always fun when you get the flow earlier than normal. Also I'm already on a very light AF day only after a 2 day normal flow.
I was thinking about it over the weekend and I may stock up on some dollar tree preg tests. Because my loss had a lower level P than normal I'd want to start suppositories as soon as possible if I ever get pregnant again. I've also had a period with both my pregnancies just for the first month. If I ever did Femera I'd be afraid I'd kill something cause you just never know with me!
guessing the mild PCOS has something to do with that?
I had had a bunch of the $tree tests thank goodness! I have decided that I don't really care for the wondfos. There is too much guessing with them (for the opks) I have a bunch of opks if anyone wants them PM me your address and I'll send them to you.
I didnt have a period with either of my pregnancies, luckily. I was already a wreck from my loss, wouldn't have done well with that.
The clomid didnt really bother my mood my mood that much, that I could tell. I've heard femera has that effect on people.
Im anxious about what the REs plan will be if AF doesn't come tomorrow.
BFP#1 10/21/11 EDD 06/22/12 natural m/c 11/03/11 6w6d
BFP#2 03/08/12 EDD 11/19/12 met our sweet boy @ 36w5d! 10/25/12!
BFP#1 10/21/11 EDD 06/22/12 natural m/c 11/03/11 6w6d
BFP#2 03/08/12 EDD 11/19/12 met our sweet boy @ 36w5d! 10/25/12!
Hope you and your doctor get a good plan going. Maybe it just takes some time after getting off the pill for your cycle to regulate. I haven't been on the pill since I was 32.
At least now I know to get that prog checked as soon as I get pregnant so I can get on the supplements if need be. With my loss my P was at a 9.5 at 4 weeks and she prescribed a oral prog supplement. I took it 1 night and had a horrible reaction to it. Called the OB and they said to not take it anymore. At least now I know there are suppositories I can get that give me zero side effects and they go straight to the source - the Uterus. I actually have 5 on hand in our bathroom in case I need it next time sooner than I get prescribed it. I've done tons of research on progesterone and during the 5/6 week pregnancy Prog levels can vary from 9-29ng so that made me feel better in the fact that I thought it was my fault for the loss regarding my P levels.
BFP#1 10/21/11 EDD 06/22/12 natural m/c 11/03/11 6w6d
BFP#2 03/08/12 EDD 11/19/12 met our sweet boy @ 36w5d! 10/25/12!
TW:
HSG/FSH/AMH/E2/SA all normal DX: unexplained IF
spontaneous BFP 01/01/2017- Alexander was born sleeping 04/13/2017 at 19w1d ic/chorio
September 2017 HSG #2 & Gonal-F/Femara/Ovidrel/IUI #1 = ep (Salpingectomy of left fallopian tube)
spontaneous BFP 01/02/2018 EDD Aug 30th It's a GIRL!
Cerclage placed on 03/02
BFP#1 10/21/11 EDD 06/22/12 natural m/c 11/03/11 6w6d
BFP#2 03/08/12 EDD 11/19/12 met our sweet boy @ 36w5d! 10/25/12!
you taking anything for that? That's a great number