FTM Questions for STMs Week of 3/26

bklynchica · April 2017

Asivec said:

Question for stm+, has anyone completed a Vbac? Details if you're comfortable. I really want to do this but the vbac board isn't very active and I don't know if my current obgyn even supports it yet.

@Asivec I'm a FTM too, but my mom did vbac. In 1983 I was delivered via c section because I was breech. In 1986 my sister was delivered vaginally. Not sure how common this is. My mom had the same doctor for both, and adores him. I actually called his office hoping to go to him as well, but he's a big shot now and no longer accepts any insurance.

jess0211 · April 2017

On the subject of bras, I have a feeling I may need a new sports bra at some point. Any recommendations for a good maternity sports bra?

toesinthesand-2 · April 2017

I've got a breastfeeding/pumping question...

For those both BF and pumped, how long did you wait to introduce a bottle?

I have friends who have exclusively BF, some who have exclusively pumped, and some who have done a combo. I know I want to both BF and pump because I want DH to get to be an active participant in feedings, just unsure how long it's suggest to wait before introducing a bottle?

kschref · April 2017

@toesinthesand-2
I feel like there is no perfect answer for this because all babies are different and have different bottle preferences. With my daughter, we didn't introduce a bottle until close to 3 months, I think, and it wasn't 100% smooth at first but it wasn't awful. I think you can find stories of people who introduced right away or delayed and you'll hear easy and difficult outcomes either way.

The best piece of advice I have about it either way is if there is an issue, to not be in the room when the bottle is introduced or be the person who introduces it. A lot of babies seem to not want the bottle, especially the first few times, if they can see or smell the source, so to speak.

slaven · April 2017

@toesinthesand-2 I've also heard to use bottle nipples similar to your let down/flow speed. If you have a slow let down, a baby can be overwhelmed by a fast flow bottle nipple or vice versa or frustrated if they're used to a fast let down and get a slow feed nipple. Theoretically (obv. every baby is different) keeping the same flow can also help from going from boob to bottle and back to boob.

kissthesky32 · April 2017

jess0211 said:

On the subject of bras, I have a feeling I may need a new sports bra at some point. Any recommendations for a good maternity sports bra?

I just wore my more worn out old sports bras - the one where some of the elastic had gone, so they still felt comfy. I was 6 days late with a HUGE belly and a 9.5lb baby and the sports bra band still wasn't an issue. For me, at least, the bump stays farther down. You'll still get some points of feet or butt all up in your ribs, but it's not enough to buy new sports bras.

kissthesky32 · April 2017

@toesinthesand-2 With my first, we waited until around 3 months and it was AWFUL. She did not want any bottle (tried multiple brands) and would scream and scream. With my second, we did it around 3 weeks instead and it was so, SO much smoother.

JDW0325 · April 2017

Breastfed babes and bottles--- such a hard thing!
with my son we introduced a bottle about 6 weeks and he was ok with it. We used a preemie nipple so it was slow flow in hopes he wouldn't have problems going back to the boob

pawcall · April 2017

@jess0211 I just bought a few target sports bras in size huge and they're working great

pawcall · April 2017

toesinthesand-2 said:

I've got a breastfeeding/pumping question...

For those both BF and pumped, how long did you wait to introduce a bottle?

I have friends who have exclusively BF, some who have exclusively pumped, and some who have done a combo. I know I want to both BF and pump because I want DH to get to be an active participant in feedings, just unsure how long it's suggest to wait before introducing a bottle?

Very individual to the baby I think, but I started pumping a bit when we came home from the hospital. Here's my baby's first bottle at 4 days old, and we successfully switched back and forth from breast to bottle for 9 months (he stopped st 9 months due to (his) severe medical issue, he would've kept going if he could've.)

pawcall · April 2017

Also, he was on a preemie nipple that whole time

DuchessOfCambridge · April 2017

How much laundry would you say you do a week with a newborn? We're having a hard time finding an apartment we like with laundry in unit and currently are hoping to get into a building with laundry on every floor. Probably won't be trying cloth diapering since we won't have our own laundry but aside from that, want to get a feel for how many loads a week to expect.

ETA clarification

hedgepig · April 2017

I second that question @DuchessOfCambridge except including cloth diapers in our case. Right now we have a funky washer and no dryer. We also live off grid so water and electricity can both be an issue at times. We're planning on buying a washer/dryer set and trying to decide on what to get.

DuchessOfCambridge · April 2017

@lahansen I did want to try CD but we decided to only if we have our own washer dryer. Just seems so economical! Oh well maybe with baby #2

hedgepig · April 2017

@DuchessOfCambridge The economics definitely plays a big part in the decision, plus we have to haul our own trash 1/2 hour in the back of our car to the dump, plus I'm just too hippy to be able to stomach the landfill waste. That said, I'm sure we'll use some disposables when necessary.

bklynchica · April 2017

Does anyone have experience with hybrid diapers? https://www.thenaturalbabyco.com/guides/cd-guide/are-diapers-biodegradable.html

tashandma · April 2017

DuchessOfCambridge said:

How much laundry would you say you do a week with a newborn? We're having a hard time finding an apartment we like with laundry in unit and currently are hoping to get into a building with laundry on every floor. Probably won't be trying cloth diapering since we won't have our own laundry but aside from that, want to get a feel for how many loads a week to expect.

ETA clarification

We never used cloth diapers but baby clothes are so tiny. Plus, you usually have tons of onesies and everyday baby wear that there isn't a need to do baby laundry more than once per week. Actually I prob went a couple of weeks between loads.

darlabauer · April 2017

tashandma said:

DuchessOfCambridge said:

How much laundry would you say you do a week with a newborn? We're having a hard time finding an apartment we like with laundry in unit and currently are hoping to get into a building with laundry on every floor. Probably won't be trying cloth diapering since we won't have our own laundry but aside from that, want to get a feel for how many loads a week to expect.

ETA clarification

We never used cloth diapers but baby clothes are so tiny. Plus, you usually have tons of onesies and everyday baby wear that there isn't a need to do baby laundry more than once per week. Actually I prob went a couple of weeks between loads.

Haha, I have a different perspective. A lot of poop and regurgitation in the early days and I was not ok smelling it or letting it sit on clothes did laundry daily!

rachelb51212 · April 2017

@DuchessOfCambridge it really depends on how much clothing you have for your baby. Usually at showers you will receive so many newborn clothes that your baby wont wear them all, but that's not always the case. I'd say we went through 3 outfits a day with our newborn for a while, but once they quit blowing out their diapers, it goes down. Then there's all the spit up that happens, so I'd count on 3 outfits a day for the first couple of months as a standard. It won't always be that much, and some days it will be more, but that's a good average. I usually do my LO's laundry once a week.

elsieisamoocow · April 2017

@DuchessOfCambridge depending on how much clothing baby has, I agree you probably only need to do it once a week. For really nasty messes, which thankfully were rare with DS, I would spray the stains and sometimes wash with blue Dawn dish soap (seriously gets out almost everything!) before putting them into the laundry basket, so they weren't just sitting there and getting gross. Each size of clothing we've had I've been able to go at least a week between washing because of gifts, me buying things on sale over time for the future, and random things that are just too cute to pass up.

BayCamp · April 2017

I do at least a load a day now, newborn I'd say one every other day, but that was all of our stuff combined. FFC: I washed baby stuff with our stuff from the beginning. I used hypoallergenic detergent anyways for my own skin so it was no big deal.

gipfish · April 2017

@DuchessOfCambridge DD was a reflux baby. Not only did she go through about 4 outfits a day as a newborn, I also had to change my clothes at least once a day the first 4 months until I started her on cereal. Definitely not the norm, but just throwing out there that some babies are messier than others.

kschref · April 2017

@lahansen - I did CD laundry every other day, sometimes every day when we were CDing 2. You definitely could go longer depending on your stash. I was a bit OCD about it. For poopy diapers I would spray with a diaper sprayer into the toilet, then pretreat with BacOut or if it was really bad, Buncha Farmers. We used Rockin green detergent. We did not put all of them in the dryer though as it can wear out the elastics faster on some types of cloth diapers. Prefolds I did put in the dryer but almost everything else was hung to dry. Our HOA does not allow laundry hung outside so I have something called a lofti in my laundry room. We use it all the time for things besides CD as well.
https://thenewclotheslinecompany.com/collections/new-clothesline-company-products/products/lofti-laundry-drying-system-white
I do not remember paying $95 for mine. I'm sure we found a sale or something.

kschref · April 2017

@bklynchica - So, I didn't use a Grovia system but I did keep a roll of biodegradable liner for when we were out of the house for extended periods of time. If it was a quick trip, I would not use it. I just threw all soiled diapers in a wet bag to rinse when we got home. But if I knew we might go through 3+ diapers while away from a sprayer, I would use a biodegradable liner to catch poop so I didn't have that sort of diaper sitting in my diaper bag or car all day. Unfortunately, I can't remember what the brand was, but it was just a roll and you could tear off the amount you wanted.

jka427 · April 2017

@kaitlinliz my DH miss the first one with DS and will miss the first three this time. I brought my mom to my first ones with both babies and I'll go by myself from now on. His loss I figure haha

hedgepig · April 2017

@kschref Thanks for the info!

baker1jm2 · April 2017

@toesinthesand-2 it varies depending on personal preference but we had to give a bottle day 1 due to DD having really bad jaundice and needing to be in the light for 24 hours. I'm actually really glad it happend that way bc she took boob and bottle awesome from day 1. I will give this baby a bottle day 1 as well. Being the only one to feed your baby would be exhausting and overwhelming in my opinion. It's super nice to get a break some nights and let hubby take over. We also noticed if I did I bottle of breast milk before bed she was WAY more full and slept a lot longer. I pretty quickly just stopped overnight pumping bc she slept and I got so much more sleep. Never really noticed a dip in supply either.

cmessamore · April 2017

For breast/bottle: each baby is so different! For the most part though, we started early, within the first few weeks and we never had a problem switching back and forth. I agree with letting someone else give the bottle feedings when you can. My youngest refused to take a bottle from me until about 3 months old but took it from DH and daycare with no issues.

As for the laundry, with my first two, I did a load of laundry probably once or twice a week. With my third, his reflux was so bad, that I did and still do his laundry every other day. It also depends how much clothes you have, as well.

MississippiCatfish · April 2017

For me, laundry needs to be every three days at a minimum just so clothes that have been pooped/spit up on don't pile up and get mildew! I will hand wash that stuff off in the sink and then air dry, but I have still gotten mildew on some really cute baby clothes because they've been sitting waiting for the wash.

If you're considering CD with subsequent children, you could look into a diaper service with this one. I've read that it's still more economical than disposables. Although, if you were going to the laundromat every third day, that would be often enough in my opinion for CD. Especially if/while baby's EBF. (I CD'd baby #1 but don't anymore.)

rms924 · April 2017

DuchessOfCambridge said:

I selfishly have two questions:
1) What was the hardest part about having a newborn in your opinion?
2) Kind of a gross question but what happens after you give birth? You have the baby, they let you see it, and then what? Do you stay in that bed with whatever came out of you? Do you get a shower? This is one of the most mysterious parts of birth to me.

1. Lack of sleep hands down. DH is the kind of person who can't handle life unless he gets 8 hours of sleep (he has since gotten better) and so when DS was born, he really struggled. For a while, I banished him to the guest room bc I didn't want to deal with two babies at once. That worked for a while. I would say a low point is when he he yelled at me one night after I passed out and literally didn't hear the baby crying. I really let him have it and he's been amazing ever since. I think it finally clicked that I've been doing all the heavy lifting for more than a year.

A close second is breastfeeding. That was really tough for me/emotional.

2. Here's my experience: I had the baby, they put him right on me. I guess right after, I must have delivered the placenta- it was kind of a blur. I had a severe tear so they took the baby and did whatever it is while the doc sewed me up. It took him a while (20 - 30 min). Then after, I immediately started nursing and hung out for a while in delivery while they got my maternity room prepped.

Honestly, I couldn't even think about showering or anything. I was in pretty bad shape from the tear. PLUS, I had an epidural headache because the dr. administering it didn't do it properly the first two times (I am still pretty annoyed by that) so post birth, I couldn't move. I needed assistance just to get to the bathroom and otherwise I had to lay totally flat on my back. Despite all that, I am desperate to do it again

I think it was the most amazing/magical experience of my life. I remember feeling such joy.

knottieadf1524e2887e6cb · April 2025

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