Ahh! I feel like I'm going bonkers. A moment of mom confession... the other night I finally told my husband what I've been feeling for the last month or so, particularly since we started DS in his crib. I feel like I'm a horrible mother at night. I am metal during the day and cardboard come night time. DS is a great napper. I rarely have issue with getting him down for a nap and he stays down for a few hours. But at night, it's like he becomes anxious and has a really hard time with going to bed. I'll go to put him down, same way that I do at nap time, and he'll wake right up and reach and cry out for me. I'm not sure what I'm doing wrong, if anything. He wakes up a lot, 3-4 times per night, and sometimes it takes me hours to get him back down again. The last few nights I've caved out of sheer exhaustion and frustration and we coslept. And he slept great. 3 hours at a time.
Ok. Any advice from mommas that have successfully gotten their baby to sleep in their cr8b after being a cosleeper? I'm not a fan of cry it out or anything of that nature. But I'm up.for any advice. I'm wondering if I put an article of my clothing in with him as a comfort thing? Maybe if he smells me it'll help? I don't know but I thought I'd put it out there...
We have the opposite problem over here @dachshundmomma. Baby usually sleeps good overnight but naps are crap. We put Elijah's crib mattress on our floor when we were trying to get him used to the crib. But maybe that's not the problem for you since naps are okay. My sis-in-law slept in both her babies' rooms when they were little and had trouble overnight. Maybe you could do that? I've considered it but end up bringing elijah into my bed. It's the least trouble for me. I've also put a soft block in with Elijah when he's having trouble sleeping. Hopefully this is just a phase for your little one and things will smooth out soon!!!
@DachshundMomma Did you just recently start trying the crib overnight? It took a good 5 weeks for us to really go from cosleeping to full nights in the crib (and I felt the same way the whole time, it was rough!) I'm not big on CIO either, so it was a gradual transition. Weirdly he slept great the first two nights of it and I thought we were just super lucky, but then it all went to crap and we were up 3-4 times a night and he would not let me put him back in the crib once he woke up the first time, so the first week I would try to stay in his room and rock him back to sleep so I could put him back in his crib, but that became too hard on me (once I fell asleep and he fell on the floor. It was real bad). After that I just took him back to bed with me after he woke up the first time. The amount of time he would stay in his crib gradually lengthened, and even when I did bring him back to bed with me I usually would wake up an hour or so later and take him back to his crib. It finally got to a point where he was actually more comfortable sleeping in his crib (he's getting big so he gets really hot when he sleeps between us, plus it's kind of crowded, lol). So now he's down to one short wake up around 1:30, I usually let him nurse for a few minutes and then I put him back in his crib, and then another wake up around 4:30. I'm usually too tired to sit up with him at that time, so I do take him to bed with me to nurse while I sleep and then I take him back once I wake back up or he gets fidgety. Sorry that was a long post, but just want to encourage you that you're not a horrible mother and it is totally a process. I thought it would never end and then it did, so there's hope! He still has his nights, but overall he sleeps very well in his crib now after cosleeping until 6 months. The article of clothing idea is worth trying, I've never thought about doing that!
Married 6/1/13
BFP #1 7/2013 MMC 9/17/13
BFP #2 5/2014 MC 6/15/14
BFP #3 11/13/14 (Found in ER with ruptured cyst) Diagnosed MC 11/15/14
BFP #4 4/2015 MC 7/1/15
BFP #5 10/21/15 EDD 7/3/16 Praying for our rainbow!
@winnie1122 he slept in my bed last night and slept pretty well. I was way too tired to do the crib shuffle haha. The exhaustion caught up yo me. Right now I'm sleeping in his room on the spare bed so I'm there for comfort when he wakes in the night but it's rough. Really rough. Our transition was interrupted with colds and an ear infection so it's been extra difficult.
We had a new experience with E last night.. she has been sleeping in her crib pretty well (still waking up 3-4x a night) but last night around 11:30 she woke up screaming. We are working on cutting out that wake-up nursing time, so we didn't go in right away. DH went in about 10 minutes later and she was screaming in her sleep. I took her and tried to calm her down, but she still wouldn't wake up. Took her to our room and turned on the light, and it took another few minutes for her to wake and calm down. We let her sleep with us, and she grabbed on to my face and neck for dear life while she fell asleep. I think she must have had a nightmare, and I feel so bad for not going in right away and letting her sit in her room feeling scared.
Oh no!!!! We have noticed she's had more restless sleeps recently. She'll whine for a sec but be back out almost instantly. I hear you though - it's hard enough convincing ourselves the tough love of letting them self soothe is right. And then to figure out they really needed you is sucky!! Creepy internet hugs to you mama.
Andrew has had a few. It's awful to hear them scream in inter terror. Your heart stops. It's part of the reason we go in everytime he cries. We provide comfort and then put him back down and start a timer
My DS has had night terrors as well. It's awful. I feel for all of you mommas who have also dealt with these. I can't imagine what they'd had terrors about at this age but apparently they have them! Not fun, not fun.
@DachshundMomma losing their favorite teether? Or maybe being forced to eat their most hated food? J/K...it is awful, and I'm sorry for all the mommas going through it
Thanks ladies it was definitely very upsetting for both DH and I (he was really teary, which rarely happens!) but she hasn't had one since. @DachshundMomma we were just talking about that too when it happened, maybe fear of being left alone? She's at the height of stranger danger/super clingy so we thought that made sense.
I definitely think this is the age when fear enters their minds. Separation anxiety is an issue around this age. We've definitely noticed L displaying signs of caution. Like she wants to try and stand against some things...but thinks twice and plops back down. I guess it's all a part of their development and unfortunately affects their sleep!
@mnkenned How old was your baby when you posted your question about dropping the night feeding? (see below) My baby is currently just shy of 4 weeks old, but I'm just wondering at what point it becomes feasible to start phasing out that MOTN feeding. (For us it happens somewhere between 2 and 3 am)
Anyone else have thoughts about when it's possible to start phasing out that wee-hours feed?
"Ok peeps...how do you start dropping nighttime feedings? I think LO is waking out of habit but I don't wanna leave her if she's hungry. We are now doing pretty well about going to sleep and ok on naps, but still up every 3-4 hours."
@puffinsandchocolate 9 months old tomorrow and we still have at least one motn feed, though now it is more of a snack than anything. He did go through a phase of sleeping through the most nights on his own starting when he was about 7? weeks old until about 6 months, but that's not necessarily 'normal' for all babies. We went back to a couple motn feedings at 6 months when we moved him to his crib and we're not back to sleeping through the night quite yet. But basically, though every baby is different, I wouldn't recommend trying to eliminate motn feedings until your LO shows signs of being ready, which I think can be anywhere from 3 months to a year. Just my opinion though!
Married 6/1/13
BFP #1 7/2013 MMC 9/17/13
BFP #2 5/2014 MC 6/15/14
BFP #3 11/13/14 (Found in ER with ruptured cyst) Diagnosed MC 11/15/14
BFP #4 4/2015 MC 7/1/15
BFP #5 10/21/15 EDD 7/3/16 Praying for our rainbow!
My baby is 8 months old and still has at least two middle of the night feedings where he actually eats (not just comfort nurses). You know your baby best, but especially if you're breastfeeding I'd be cautious of trying to phase out a night feeding, since breast milk digests so quickly. Hang in there though, those nights are rough!
@puffinsandchocolate E dropped her MOTN feeding completely at 4 months. We occasionally had instances where she needed it again because she didn't intake enough during the day, but we haven't had consistent wakings to eat since then. I believe we dropped her 10pm feeding at 6 months if I remember correctly! That turned out to be a comfort feeding and I could have dropped it earlier. She's been sleeping 12 hours straight since then.
AJ is 9 months and still has 1-2 MOTN feeds kinda. This week he's stretched them and he'll wake up right around 1130 and then at roughly 5ish. I'm waking up soaked again
Elijah has gone through periods of being without MOTN feedings at these ages- 3 months and 6-8 months. At 4 months and 8 months he had some pretty serious sleep regressions so I dealt with it by putting a boob in his face. He's 9 months now and back at one feeding a night. Hoping he'll start sleeping again soon! Good luck to you!
Please tell me there is a regression close to 8 months...my Lo is just restless around 130-2 every night he wont sleep unless you have your hand on his back..hell be snoring and then ten mins later he wakes up bc your hand is gone. Im losing my mind. Ive noticed during the day too if you leave the room from him he screams. must be some total separation anxiety.
There is a 8 mo sleep regression! I think Elijah went through a separation anxiety thing a few weeks ago. He would wake up and make this scared cry. Poor babies. It gets better though! And this sleep regression is not nearly as bad as the 4 month one!
I think we are in the 8 month regression... Q has been up every night at 3 for the past 3 nights. Last night it took him 2 hours to go back to sleep! I'm not used to him waking up in the motn anymore and I'm missing my sleep for sure. And he has gone from taking great naps to pretty much no naps
For the last 3 nights, DS has been on a 60-90 minute sleep cycle. It's so hard to get him to go back down. He sits himself straight up in his crib and just cries. But as soon as I pick him up, he's comforted and relaxes, slowly drifting back off. I thought getting up every 2.5 hrs was bad...Boy was I wrong! Someday I will sleep again. Someday...
There is a 9 month regression that can happen between 8 and 10 months. I'm currently trying to decide if we are battling that or teething (her gums are def inflamed). We are still way better than we were a few months ago, but there has been a very noticeable difference in her sleep...humph
M's 2 bottom teeth are through! She's only getting up once a night now. And nursing. Trying to decide if I should let her CIO now (if it's just habit to wake up) or if she needs the feeding. Momming is hard.
@LDSJM123 momming is definitely hard! yay for teeth though!
I was just reading about the 8-10 month regression and I think our naps may be part of our new issue. S has been taking her afternoon nap much later the past few days. She has still been asleep in her crib when I get home from work at 5-530...may need to look into that some more.
Well it's 6am here a d Baby J slept through the entire night. I woke up at 4am and waited and fell back asleep. Now i'm wide awake at 6am because I haven't slept this much in like the past year. I hope this stays!
GUYS we are on day 4 of morning crib napping! It still takes a good 30 minutes-an hour for her to cry herself to sleep, but she stays in there for about 45 minutes on average. The afternoon nap is a different beast entirely, but I'm super happy with our progress so far.
@puffinsandchocolate - I just saw this, sorry! I think that was around 5 months? I started letting her fuss for a few minutes before going in and she has dropped one feed, sometimes two. As far as I understand, four weeks is too soon. Most pedis say you can try CIO between 4-6 months but babies can't self-soothe before then. Hang in there!
When are your babies napping? We had finally gotten on a good schedule of 10:30 ish and 3ish, but now she's staying awake longer and with daylight savings time, she's not napping until noon won't take a second nap. By the time we get to bedtime, she's a hot mess. What are your schedules looking like?
M is up between 6-7am. Still no set schedule other than I know she'll take a morning and afternoon nap. And the afternoon nap start time varies from 1-4. But bedtime is steadily 7-8. Depends when that second nap happened. I'm really just taking her lead. And following her ques.
Our ideal schedule is awake at 8 AM, nap 11-1, nap 4-5, bedtime at 8 PM, nurses 2 times in the night. However, I follow her lead. Today she woke up poopy at 7:30 AM so her first nap will probably be around 10:30 or when she looks tired. Although on Mondays DD1 has dance, so we aren't home until 11:30. DD2 has later naps on those days.
L rises for the day around 6:15-6:30. We're fortunate she likes to wake up slowly, and will play happily in her crib for almost 20 minutes! I try and bust out half my morning routine in that time. Morning nap is pretty consistently between 9:30-10. That nap is crap. Maybe 45 minutes. If she hits an hour I'm jumping for joy. Then she's up....eating, playing and typically back out around 1:30-2. The afternoon nap can range from an hour to 1.5 hours. Most days, it's safe to say she's done napping by 2:45pm and hits the crib again around 7-7:30pm. She is NOT the baby that can be pushed beyond that. The fuss would be undeniable, lol.
We had some friends over for dinner about a month ago....with a baby a month older than L (and an older sibling). It was 8:30 maybe almost 9, and that baby was still going strong!! Ours had been in her crib for almost 2 hours. My husband and I were speechless that their LO just kept trucking along, lol. They said her typical bedtime is 6:45. She well exceeded what she's used to, but did it so nicely!
I was actually wondering how everyone's schedule's are like. Baby J usually gets up.between 6-7am. Sometimes she'll take a 30 minute nap around 830, some days not. We go to stroller strides consistently at 915am until 11am. If she took the 830 nap, we'll stay afterward and she'll nap around 12pm otherwise she'll nap at 11am. Her last nap will be between 3-4pm with a bedtime of 7pm.
Re: Sleep Regressions/Sleep Help
DS is a great napper. I rarely have issue with getting him down for a nap and he stays down for a few hours. But at night, it's like he becomes anxious and has a really hard time with going to bed. I'll go to put him down, same way that I do at nap time, and he'll wake right up and reach and cry out for me. I'm not sure what I'm doing wrong, if anything. He wakes up a lot, 3-4 times per night, and sometimes it takes me hours to get him back down again. The last few nights I've caved out of sheer exhaustion and frustration and we coslept. And he slept great. 3 hours at a time.
Ok. Any advice from mommas that have successfully gotten their baby to sleep in their cr8b after being a cosleeper? I'm not a fan of cry it out or anything of that nature. But I'm up.for any advice. I'm wondering if I put an article of my clothing in with him as a comfort thing? Maybe if he smells me it'll help? I don't know but I thought I'd put it out there...
Sorry that was a long post, but just want to encourage you that you're not a horrible mother and it is totally a process. I thought it would never end and then it did, so there's hope! He still has his nights, but overall he sleeps very well in his crib now after cosleeping until 6 months. The article of clothing idea is worth trying, I've never thought about doing that!
Me too baby, me too lol.
Anyone else have thoughts about when it's possible to start phasing out that wee-hours feed?
"Ok peeps...how do you start dropping nighttime feedings? I think LO is waking out of habit but I don't wanna leave her if she's hungry. We are now doing pretty well about going to sleep and ok on naps, but still up every 3-4 hours."
I thought getting up every 2.5 hrs was bad...Boy was I wrong! Someday I will sleep again. Someday...
I was just reading about the 8-10 month regression and I think our naps may be part of our new issue. S has been taking her afternoon nap much later the past few days. She has still been asleep in her crib when I get home from work at 5-530...may need to look into that some more.
We had some friends over for dinner about a month ago....with a baby a month older than L (and an older sibling). It was 8:30 maybe almost 9, and that baby was still going strong!! Ours had been in her crib for almost 2 hours. My husband and I were speechless that their LO just kept trucking along, lol. They said her typical bedtime is 6:45. She well exceeded what she's used to, but did it so nicely!