Hello, let me introduce myself first..
For the first 30 years of my life, everything was smooth and worry-free. I was my parents’ most beloved child, found my true love in college, and happily married him after graduation.
At work, I was my boss’s most valued employee. Whenever I was in charge of a project, colleagues would inevitably say, “Oh, then I’m totally at ease.” I was constantly named “Employee of the Year,” with generous bonuses every year.
Later, I started my own business. Within just three months, I had broken into the market and started making money. By the fifth month, I was earning twice my previous salary. Growth was steady month after month. Right when the business needed more hands, I serendipitously met an amazing partner, and the company reached a whole new level.
Really, it seemed like at every step, whatever I needed, a pair of hands would always place it right in front of me, just in time.
My Two Girls: Ellie & Mia
Meet Ellie, My Firstborn
In 2020, my husband and I decided to have a child. After trying for over a year, we finally got the news in 2021 that a little one was on the way. In 2022, we welcomed our first child, Ellie. She made me a mother.
She is utterly adorable—big eyes, rosy skin, chubby little hands. Every time I look at her, I can’t help but give her a kiss. She is pure joy, and I love her more each day.
But as a first-time mom, I faced unprecedented difficulties. The postpartum tearing wouldn’t heal, and the pain was excruciating. Clogged milk ducts made my breasts hard as rocks. The severe sleep deprivation… And what was even more crushing was that, with zero parenting experience, I was clueless when faced with her unexplained wailing, night terrors, refusal to nurse, constipation, diarrhea, fevers… I desperately searched online, longing for one accurate, truly useful answer!
It was during this time that I thought, once I make it through this “dark” path, I must leave a light on for other new moms.
And Then Came Mia
Ellie had just turned one when I got pregnant again. In 2024, we welcomed our second daughter, Mia.
Completely different from Ellie, Mia is a great eater and sleeper. Although she had her fussy moments in the first two months, starting almost from month three, she became super easygoing. She feeds on schedule, gradually sleeps through the night, loves her solid foods, and adapted quickly when I had to stop breastfeeding due to mastitis.
This made me realize just how vastly different babies can be! It made me even more determined to write about my experiences.
Why I Had to Start This Blog
The Catalyst: A Life Pivoted
After Mia was born, my business also began to decline sharply. I had no choice but to close it and become a full-time mom. My work no longer involves Excel and Word, but instead revolves around changing diapers, washing bottles, making baby food, and managing household chores…
This has been a monumental challenge for me. All my past achievements seem irrelevant now. Managing two young children has brought me a sense of frustration I’ve never known before.
The Daily Reality
They are always fighting over things. When one is in my arms, the other immediately demands to be held too. When I try to cook, Ellie wants me to read her a book. When I attempt to load the washing machine, Mia has a diaper blowout, and I must drop everything to change her…
By the time I finish all that, I see the cup of hot coffee on the table has gone cold again. And it’s not until evening that I remember, “Oh my goodness, the clothes are still in the hamper, unwashed!”
Of course, being a mom is filled with happiness, but that doesn’t negate how hard it is.
My Promise to You
Because I’ve walked this path myself, I won’t just tell you how joyful motherhood is, like many websites do. I want to share my real, unfiltered experiences so every new mom can find a “companion” here.
I want to tell you: you are not alone. What you’re going through, I’ve been there too. Your breakdowns, your helplessness, your moments of losing control—I’ve had them all. You don’t need to feel guilty. This is just a small, necessary stretch of the journey for every mom.
My Hope for This Space
I really want to share my parenting experiences—not just the warm, glowing moments, but to honestly document the pitfalls I’ve stumbled into, the tears I’ve shed, and the “survival wisdom” I’ve scraped together in utter exhaustion.
The Goal: A Mom’s Toolkit
I hope this blog becomes a “mom’s toolkit,” filled not with vague theories, but with:
- Practical Tips: Like how to quickly figure out why a baby is crying, tried-and-true methods for dealing with clogged ducts, or how to efficiently manage the daily grind with twins (or two under two) solo.
- Pitfall Avoidance Guides: Sharing the baby products I regret buying the most, and those “game-changer” parenting hacks. Letting you know which parenting anxieties you can let go of, and which principles are worth holding onto.
- A Community for Moms: I hope my stories connect me with more moms like you. We can cheer each other on in the comments, share our own tricks, turning the storms we face alone into a journey we walk together.
The Bigger Vision
My previous career taught me to analyze data, solve problems, and optimize processes. Now, I’m applying all those skills to this new “position” of Mom. I want to prove that a mom’s value is absolutely not confined to the home. The mindset, resilience, and creativity we built in our careers can shine just as brightly—perhaps even brighter—in this more complex, long-term “project” of raising humans, and can even be transformed into a force that helps others.
My hope is simple: that every mom who opens this blog can let out a sigh of relief and say, “So it’s not just me.” Then, she can find a bit of practical info, a dose of comforting solidarity, and return to her sweet, chaotic mom-life with a little more confidence and a little less weight on her shoulders.
This road? Let’s walk it together.
Re: Team Green!
And family has also been putting pressure on it. Not as many as I thought though. But my husband and step-daughter want to know. And when I told my sister I want to wait her response was "Ew, no don't do that"...
Note, I am probably not Team Green. Just lurking on all the threads. Currently I'm considering not learning the sex, though, because I'm so sick of people asking what the baby is and exactly what day we'll find out. Also considering just not telling people.
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Me 34 DH 34
PCOS
Baby number 2 due 4/11/20
ETA sex not gender. Oops
I also don't like calling the baby "it" so I usually say "baby" or "he." my husband says I'm jinxing it because I called DD "he" the whole time, but I was sure she was a boy, lol!
@Toshandbaby I also love the reactions... keeps me motivated to stay team green **evil laugh**
@cchenal07 We say Sweet P (Our last name starts with P) or baby. I've said "it" too, and agree it feels weird, but it feels even weirder for me to commit to he or she.
Married: 10.15.16
DS BD: 8.20.17
TTC #2 1.1.19
BFP #2 7.3.19
EDD #2 3.13.20
The most frustrating part was one of the women who took my vitals asked what we were having. I told her we weren't going to find out, and she kid glared at me and said "how do you not wanna know?" I said, "well of course we want to know, but we'd rather it be a surprise." She was so judgy about it. Then she asked what names we liked. I don't want to discuss names with most people I know, let alone complete strangers, so I said "We have a few we like and we're just going to have some options and decide when we meet them." She said, "no, that baby needs a name." I said, "well they'll have a name, but we'll decide after they're born." She said, "you'll give your baby a complex if they don't have a name right away." WTAF? We're going to name this baby, and they won't have a complex. And plus also, how does one who works with pregnant women every day act like this? I can't be the first person choosing to not be surprised by the sex. Blah.
Married: 10.15.16
DS BD: 8.20.17
TTC #2 1.1.19
BFP #2 7.3.19
EDD #2 3.13.20
DS certainly doesn't have a complex from having his name picked out of the blue within minutes of being laid on my chest. And do people completely forget that for centuries it wasn't even an option to find out what you were having and folks did just fine. She deserves a smack upside the head.
Married: 10.15.16
DS BD: 8.20.17
TTC #2 1.1.19
BFP #2 7.3.19
EDD #2 3.13.20
Pretty sure it is going to be a small human.
@margareth @sarahufl lol at the bolded
BFP #1 June 2016: EDD 16 March 2017, MC July 2016
Re-started TTC Aug 2016
Started IF testing Nov 2016
Spontaneous BFP #2 January 2017: Rainbow Baby Boy September 2017
BFP #3 November 2018: Baby #2 expected August 2019
Are you still Team Green?
Has it gotten easier/harder?
How are things going as far as your neutral nursery or coming home outfits?
Married: 10.15.16
DS BD: 8.20.17
TTC #2 1.1.19
BFP #2 7.3.19
EDD #2 3.13.20
We are still team green, and we both agree it's gotten easier now. We've made it this far, and now it's just exciting! I have to remind the u/s tech at every visit, even though I know it's in my chart. We had a mishap at my 20 week, but since we never got an official announcement, I'm still team green in my head.
Here are pics of our nursery & coming home outfits. I've actually loved all the neutral options!
Married: 10.15.16
DS BD: 8.20.17
TTC #2 1.1.19
BFP #2 7.3.19
EDD #2 3.13.20
Are you still Team Green? Yes!
Has it gotten easier/harder? Easier, especially now that things are done.
How are things going as far as your neutral nursery or coming home outfits? Nursery is pretty much done just waiting on our footstool for the rocker, moses basket and another picture to hang! Coming home outfit is a little different. I dug out and washed all the white short sleeve and long sleeve onesies so baby will most likely come home in one of those. If it is a boy we will use all of DS clothes and if it is a girl I know that both my Mom and Mother in law will take care of showering us with little girl things almost immediately! Lol!
Has it gotten easier/harder? A little easier. Still get tempted here.
How are things going as far as your neutral nursery or coming home outfits? Skipping a nursery this time. We had one mostly done last time but we ended up bedsharing until about a month ago. Now he has his own bed in our room. And baby will bedshare with me again as long as it works for us again. Debating using the same coming home outfit but it might be a little warm with the enclosed feet. Or I might get a new cooler gender neutral option again.
@MrsVP614 Love those coming home options!
also have to remind u/s tech every time and kind of nervous someone will give it away in the last few weeks! Probably not, though.
a lot of ppl who know me have thought boy but I think that's bc I have 3 brothers and H has 2 brothers; we have no sisters. But my dad is convinced it's a girl (funny enough -- wouldn't expect him to have a prediction) and the first few predictions have been girl -- I haven't a clue!
Very exciting and overwhelming as a FTM since I *really* don't know what to expect.
Gender neutral is so fun -- a lot of animals, especially bunnies! No pink, but pretty much all other colors work. Love green and yellow.
We plan to have baby share a room with DS once baby is older (we'll room share for at least the first year, longer if baby still isn't sleeping through the night), and we were team green the first time around so the nursery is already pretty gender neutral. I remember when I picked the colors (grey with splashes of turquoise, yellow, and coral) people were convinced we were having a girl because why would we ever put pink in a boys room...I swear people are insane.
We'll probably use one of DS's newborn outfits for coming home.
@MrsVP614 I love that little outfit. The snuggle is real.
Married 2013
Kiddo #1: Sept 2015
BFP: 1/19, EDD: 9/30
"I'm having fruit salad for dinner. Well, it's mostly just grapes, actually. Ok all grapes. Fermented grapes. Fine, I'm having wine for dinner."
It definitely makes things even more exciting leading up to the big day.
It's also been nice getting stuff we need at our baby showers. There are lots of cute, neutral clothes, but I know if we announced the sex, we would've ended up with lots of pink/blue stuff that's not our style anyway.
I also love this... my best friend from college is due with her first in January. When I told her we weren't finding out the sex, she was shocked, almost disgusted haha. But now, she's team green too! I didn't really try to convince her, but after hearing all my reasons, she's decided to not find out too. So fun!
Married: 10.15.16
DS BD: 8.20.17
TTC #2 1.1.19
BFP #2 7.3.19
EDD #2 3.13.20
It's been harder not knowing this time since we already have a girl, but it's a lot of fun and saves me money not to know!
The nursery is gender neutral since we didn't know with our first. I still need to kick her out though so the new baby has a space. I'm in the process of setting up DD room, which is hard because if this one is a girl I'd make it super cute and girly so they could share eventually. I'll probably go with a more neutral space though.