I agree with everyone else, 2 days isn't very much at all. Hope he changes his mind and takes a little more.
Right now the plan is for DH to take a week off, but his boss told him that they would be flexible and if he needed more we could arrange something at the time.
DH will take a few days off once baby is born and then gets 2 weeks at full pay to take anytime before LO is 6 mos old. He is planning to take them the last week of June and first week of July to go on vacation and to a family reunion.
With DD he took a full week off and it was too many people taking care of baby. I felt 100% from the moment my epidural wore off and both of our moms live within 15 minutes of our house. We all got a little stir crazy.
Honestly day 3 out of hospital is when dh was supposed to go to work but I was a mess over how bf was going crying trying to give up that he took another 2 days just to make sure I was mentally OK and would be able to take care of lo. If you have a bad tear or c section your MD will not allow you to drive right away. Itll also allow for him to give you a break from visitors and things a's he can be a type of traffic cop.
I am letting him decide how much time he takes off, but I think DH is going to try to take a week off. He currently works for a small company, but if he does change jobs, that could change how much time off he takes. After trying to find a daycare, and seeing the very real high chance of us not having any, I almost want to make him wait.
With our first he took 2 weeks. With our second he took one week. And this one will likely be the same. I'm trying to push for more but his workload is just too heavy. I'm now pushing for a week off and a week working from home. A week last time really wasn't bad, but any more time would've been fantastic.
DH is military so he gets his 10 days of leave. We are trying to decide when he should take those days as my mom *should* be here for the delivery and after so I'd rather not have them both just sitting around at the same time, but I also know how exhausting a newborn is so DH might just take the 10 days right away as well.
@bacorrea@WombThereItIs Did you see that in the new defense act for 2017 that was signed that "Under regulations prescribed by the Secretary of Defense, a member of the armed forces described in subsection (i)(2) who is the secondary caregiver in the case of the birth of a child or the adoption of a child is allowed up to 21 days of leave to be used in connection with such birth or adoption."
Sooo it did officially pass, but the likelyhood of it being implemented in new regulations from Sec. of Defense before our May due dates? Probably slim to none right?
Married 03.09.09 Sweet Baby H 12.21.11 Sassy Baby P 03.26.14 Little Brother Due 05.22.17
@hp_momma: Do those 10 days have to be consecutive or can he break it up? ... 21 days sounds much better; hopefully they'll allow it in time for you to take advantage!
DH is military so he gets his 10 days of leave. We are trying to decide when he should take those days as my mom *should* be here for the delivery and after so I'd rather not have them both just sitting around at the same time, but I also know how exhausting a newborn is so DH might just take the 10 days right away as well.
@bacorrea@WombThereItIs Did you see that in the new defense act for 2017 that was signed that "Under regulations prescribed by the Secretary of Defense, a member of the armed forces described in subsection (i)(2) who is the secondary caregiver in the case of the birth of a child or the adoption of a child is allowed up to 21 days of leave to be used in connection with such birth or adoption."
Sooo it did officially pass, but the likelyhood of it being implemented in new regulations from Sec. of Defense before our May due dates? Probably slim to none right?
Reading that though I wonder if it's not an extension from the 10 days of parental leave but just means you can be approved to take some of your accrued leave for that purpose? That's how my husband read it since it doesn't say parental leave it probably means regular leave.
@WombThereItIs That's what DH and I were wondering too... it says "secondary parent" which is supposed to be described in more detail once it goes into regulation. If it was just approval for use of leave days DH wouldn't take it. I thought last year they discussed upping it to 14 days and that didn't happen so I'm not really getting my hopes up that this will happen either. I haven't heard much talk about it!
Married 03.09.09 Sweet Baby H 12.21.11 Sassy Baby P 03.26.14 Little Brother Due 05.22.17
@hp_momma Hmmm I haven't heard about that at all. DH will be taking "normal" leave though (as long as he is approved) because he is in TX and we are in VA until I get cleared 6 weeks after birth. We will know more next week when he checks into his new BN.
Haha! Well... if this baby is due on her due date then DH will be leaving from the hospital to pick up our international student. We're taking in 2 or 3 this year. My MIL is also coming to stay with us for a while because our Au Pair needs to leave in June. But the au pair will probably still be here. So we'll have 3 international students, our au pair, our former foster youth who still lives with us, and my MIL. Plus our two oldet kids (age 2 and 3). Personally, I hope DH goes back to work right away. One less person to deal with during the day.
Holy crap. Props to you for hosting an international student or 3, those are great programs, but I couldn't do that, not with a newborn. Wow. Good for you. But still... holy crap.
We did it when DD was a newborn, too. It was great! They are all here to work as camp counselors so they love kids. One of them became our au pair. They've become family. They also work long hours so we don't see them a whole lot. The tough part will be the lovely post birth bathroom time when we have that many people and only 2 bathrooms.
B born 7/15/13, C born 3/2/15, #3 on the way May '17
I’m a modern man, a man for the millennium. Digital and smoke free. A diversified multi-cultural, post-modern deconstruction that is anatomically and ecologically incorrect. I’ve been up linked and downloaded, I’ve been inputted and outsourced, I know the upside of downsizing, I know the downside of upgrading. I’m a high-tech low-life. A cutting edge, state-of-the-art bi-coastal multi-tasker and I can give you a gigabyte in a nanosecond! I’m new wave, but I’m old school and my inner child is outward bound. I’m a hot-wired, heat seeking, warm-hearted cool customer, voice activated and bio-degradable. I interface with my database, my database is in cyberspace, so I’m interactive, I’m hyperactive and from time to time I’m radioactive.
I think I was told not to drive for maybe 2 weeks after my cesarean but I had to anyway. Some docs will say not to drive even after a vaginal delivery too though.
@mspacman34 I think it depends on the drugs you're taking. My mom was on Percocet (I'm pretty sure) and you're not supposed drive while taking Percocet.
DH has to use his vacation days to take time off so he 2 weeks last time which felt fine. My parents live very close (like across the street lol) so I had lots of help from them and friends. This time he is planning on just a week but we leave mid June for 4 weeks in Europe so he needs to save his time off for that. Again I should have plenty of help from family and friends.
My husband took about a week total off last time, including the days in the hospital. He also worked graveyard on a rotating schedule though, so every other week he got 5 days off. Working graveyard was hard with a newborn though; I had nights all alone and then tried to keep baby somewhat quiet while he slept during the day. Luckily it was summer so we were outside a lot
This time we are really hoping for 2 weeks off, but he works for a small company and won't get any actual leave. Unfortunately it's during a really busy time, but they'll survive. Luckily we also have both sets of parents in town, and I plan to send the toddler to respective grandparents houses at least 2 days a week or for partial days to help keep him in a routine.
I honestly haven't even thought about DH staying home after. We need to check into this and see what his company offers.
FTM question: How long are you not allowed to drive with a C-section? Do people who deliver vaginally have driving restrictions as well?
I never had a c-section but from what I know from friends, family, etc, I think that 2 weeks restriction is standard. As for vaginal, I was never restricted and I think that is common.
My husband took a week off with our first. I didn't want my mom or mother in law coming to stay (nagging, in my space) and we managed just fine with the modern conveniences of take out, housekeeper, dishwasher and washer dryer. This time he'll take two weeks off as managing our toddler will be extra work as I recover. He is president of a 2,000 person company and the two weeks was his suggestion - I think it sets a positive example but he wouldn't take more time than that as he says "three weeks off is just enough time to prove that we don't need you". I guess it's different for every family depending on what works best for them.
Late to this party, but wanted to chime in with our plans. With our 1st, DH took a month off, which was nice, but also a little overkill with all the visiting families, etc. This go around, he's planning to take 2 weeks and then every Friday for the balance of my 12 week maternity leave. I like this idea because it will space things out a little more. We'll see how it goes, though. If he needs to hang with me for more than 2 weeks in the beginning, his work is flexible.
@kat81@mspacman34 I think its standards because most cs mommas are still on narcotic pain medication those first two weeks and so driving is restricted. Vaginal deliveries don't normally go home on medication more than ibuprofen so driving is not an issue.
I wouldn't be so sure the meds are the reason for the restrictions. I went home on Motrin and still was told not to drive.
Someone with more letters after their name can fact check me but I recall it has something to do with increased risk of uterine rupture in the case of an accident.
@WombThereItIs maybe! Ya I wasn't sure, my experience was only a vaginal delivery. But wouldn't the risk of uterine rupture be similar if you were driving or riding passenger since the restriction is only for driving? Not being argumentative, purely just curious
I wouldn't be so sure the meds are the reason for the restrictions. I went home on Motrin and still was told not to drive.
Someone with more letters after their name can fact check me but I recall it has something to do with increased risk of uterine rupture in the case of an accident.
I just didn't some quick googling because I was curious and found lot so of different reasons, though none of them were from reliable sources. But here's what people were told after their cs as reasons to not drive/when they would be able to drive: could not drive until off narcotics, could drive once able to get into car with no pain, could turn and check blind spots with minimal to no pain, could lift up foot and adequately slam on the breaks. Many people were told different things and different time frames. It seems to vary a lot from doctor to doctor.
@WombThereItIs I thought the same assumption about not driving after CS, the narcotics and uterine rupture. I wasn't told about any driving restrictions after either of my vaginal deliveries, but don't forget you really aren't driving by yourself because your not supposed to be lifting anything heavier than your infant... so no lifting that car seat in and out of the car!
Married 03.09.09 Sweet Baby H 12.21.11 Sassy Baby P 03.26.14 Little Brother Due 05.22.17
Late to this party, but wanted to chime in with our plans. With our 1st, DH took a month off, which was nice, but also a little overkill with all the visiting families, etc. This go around, he's planning to take 2 weeks and then every Friday for the balance of my 12 week maternity leave. I like this idea because it will space things out a little more. We'll see how it goes, though. If he needs to hang with me for more than 2 weeks in the beginning, his work is flexible.
Ooh I like this idea, I will have to run this by DH and see if it's something that he can even do. Long weekends are so nice
I would've assumed the driving restrictions were because using a clutch constantly, plus things like turning to check blind spots would be painful with an abdominal incision. In saying that though my dad just had a hernia repair and was cleared to drive after 24hrs. I wasn't given any driving restrictions, once discharged from hospital they legally cannot stop you (different country different laws though) once you leave hospital you must be capable of returning to "normal duties" which includes driving, otherwise the hospital is liable if you get in an accident. I still cannot imagine driving less than a week after giving birth vaginally though, but in saying that all my cars are manual with heavy clutches, so that's where that comes from. If I had an automatic I would probably drive home from hospital.
Me - 22 | DH - 32 | Married - 24 May 2014 DS - January 2014
TTC#2 - December 2015
BFP - 6 March 2016 | MC Confirmed - 21 March 2016 TTCAL | April 2016 CP | June 2016 CP | July 2016
@NotAPlaya-JustCrushAlot it's similar to there, you can leave as early as 4hrs after a vaginal birth or stay for up to 5 days depending, I'm not 100% sure on c-sections having never had one, but I think it's a minimum of 4 days
Me - 22 | DH - 32 | Married - 24 May 2014 DS - January 2014
TTC#2 - December 2015
BFP - 6 March 2016 | MC Confirmed - 21 March 2016 TTCAL | April 2016 CP | June 2016 CP | July 2016
@NotAPlaya-JustCrushAlot it's similar to there, you can leave as early as 4hrs after a vaginal birth or stay for up to 5 days depending, I'm not 100% sure on c-sections having never had one, but I think it's a minimum of 4 days
Holy cow, you only get 2 days here for a vaginal and 3 days for a c-section delivery. I don't know how I would feel about being in the hospital for that many days. Maybe nice with the first baby but beyond that I would hate leaving my other kids for that long. Although I also would never do less than the 2 or 3 days because with my first I developed a UTI the night before being discharged that gave me a high fever and scared the nursing staff so I feel like being there the entire time is important.
Me: 38 DH: 36 Married 8/27/2011 BFP #1 9/28/2011 DS born 5/22/2012 BFP #2 4/24/2013 m/c 4/25/2013 at 4w BFP #3 1/31/2014 DD born 10/14/2014 BFP #4 1/20/2016 m/c 2/12/2014 at 7w2d BFP #5 8/19/2016 DS2 born 4/29/2017 BFP #6 3/7/2018 EDD 11/18/2018
@NotAPlaya-JustCrushAlot it's similar to there, you can leave as early as 4hrs after a vaginal birth or stay for up to 5 days depending, I'm not 100% sure on c-sections having never had one, but I think it's a minimum of 4 days
Holy cow, you only get 2 days here for a vaginal and 3 days for a c-section delivery. I don't know how I would feel about being in the hospital for that many days. Maybe nice with the first baby but beyond that I would hate leaving my other kids for that long. Although I also would never do less than the 2 or 3 days because with my first I developed a UTI the night before being discharged that gave me a high fever and scared the nursing staff so I feel like being there the entire time is important.
It all depends on how busy it is here, most people don't stay more than 2-3 days, I was there 5 total, 2 before delivery, 3 after and was going stir crazy by then. They also make FTM's stay overnight minimum, STM+ only have to stay a minimum of 4hrs (assuming no complications or epi) Im not sure what I will do this time, I think I'll still want at least 2 nights I don't feel comfortable with "have baby, go home" we also have home visits 3 times in the first 2 weeks. sometimes I think it's overkill but I'd rather too much care than not enough
Me - 22 | DH - 32 | Married - 24 May 2014 DS - January 2014
TTC#2 - December 2015
BFP - 6 March 2016 | MC Confirmed - 21 March 2016 TTCAL | April 2016 CP | June 2016 CP | July 2016
@NotAPlaya-JustCrushAlot it's similar to there, you can leave as early as 4hrs after a vaginal birth or stay for up to 5 days depending, I'm not 100% sure on c-sections having never had one, but I think it's a minimum of 4 days
Holy cow, you only get 2 days here for a vaginal and 3 days for a c-section delivery. I don't know how I would feel about being in the hospital for that many days. Maybe nice with the first baby but beyond that I would hate leaving my other kids for that long. Although I also would never do less than the 2 or 3 days because with my first I developed a UTI the night before being discharged that gave me a high fever and scared the nursing staff so I feel like being there the entire time is important.
It all depends on how busy it is here, most people don't stay more than 2-3 days, I was there 5 total, 2 before delivery, 3 after and was going stir crazy by then. They also make FTM's stay overnight minimum, STM+ only have to stay a minimum of 4hrs (assuming no complications or epi) Im not sure what I will do this time, I think I'll still want at least 2 nights I don't feel comfortable with "have baby, go home" we also have home visits 3 times in the first 2 weeks. sometimes I think it's overkill but I'd rather too much care than not enough
Like a nurse from the hospital? Comes to your house? And gets paid by not-you? What a wonderful program to have in place!
@NotAPlaya-JustCrushAlot it's similar to there, you can leave as early as 4hrs after a vaginal birth or stay for up to 5 days depending, I'm not 100% sure on c-sections having never had one, but I think it's a minimum of 4 days
Holy cow, you only get 2 days here for a vaginal and 3 days for a c-section delivery. I don't know how I would feel about being in the hospital for that many days. Maybe nice with the first baby but beyond that I would hate leaving my other kids for that long. Although I also would never do less than the 2 or 3 days because with my first I developed a UTI the night before being discharged that gave me a high fever and scared the nursing staff so I feel like being there the entire time is important.
It all depends on how busy it is here, most people don't stay more than 2-3 days, I was there 5 total, 2 before delivery, 3 after and was going stir crazy by then. They also make FTM's stay overnight minimum, STM+ only have to stay a minimum of 4hrs (assuming no complications or epi) Im not sure what I will do this time, I think I'll still want at least 2 nights I don't feel comfortable with "have baby, go home" we also have home visits 3 times in the first 2 weeks. sometimes I think it's overkill but I'd rather too much care than not enough
Like a nurse from the hospital? Comes to your house? And gets paid by not-you? What a wonderful program to have in place!
I agree! That sounds so good!
Me: 38 DH: 36 Married 8/27/2011 BFP #1 9/28/2011 DS born 5/22/2012 BFP #2 4/24/2013 m/c 4/25/2013 at 4w BFP #3 1/31/2014 DD born 10/14/2014 BFP #4 1/20/2016 m/c 2/12/2014 at 7w2d BFP #5 8/19/2016 DS2 born 4/29/2017 BFP #6 3/7/2018 EDD 11/18/2018
I really enjoy learning how different all of your experiences were. I've thought more of how long I'd like my fiancé to stay at home with me. I was really thinking a week was more than enough, but now I'm not so sure.
As of right now, we both agreed a week would be fine. Luckily, his boss told us that he will allow SO to let him know when he'd need it (post baby or a week after baby is born).
After reading all of your posts, I want to ask him to request FMLA. We can go a month without pay, seeing as we will be with my mom at her house. I'd really like him to bond with our first child. I think that would be really special. And why not take advantage of all the help we'll get?
@NotAPlaya-JustCrushAlot it's similar to there, you can leave as early as 4hrs after a vaginal birth or stay for up to 5 days depending, I'm not 100% sure on c-sections having never had one, but I think it's a minimum of 4 days
Holy cow, you only get 2 days here for a vaginal and 3 days for a c-section delivery. I don't know how I would feel about being in the hospital for that many days. Maybe nice with the first baby but beyond that I would hate leaving my other kids for that long. Although I also would never do less than the 2 or 3 days because with my first I developed a UTI the night before being discharged that gave me a high fever and scared the nursing staff so I feel like being there the entire time is important.
It all depends on how busy it is here, most people don't stay more than 2-3 days, I was there 5 total, 2 before delivery, 3 after and was going stir crazy by then. They also make FTM's stay overnight minimum, STM+ only have to stay a minimum of 4hrs (assuming no complications or epi) Im not sure what I will do this time, I think I'll still want at least 2 nights I don't feel comfortable with "have baby, go home" we also have home visits 3 times in the first 2 weeks. sometimes I think it's overkill but I'd rather too much care than not enough
Like a nurse from the hospital? Comes to your house? And gets paid by not-you? What a wonderful program to have in place!
Yes, exactly, a midwife, that is government funded, comes to your house 2 days after discharge, then again 2 days later and another the following week if you opt for it. No matter how far from the hospital you live. It also negates the need to drag your week old to the doctor for weight checks. They weigh and measure, as well as help with feeding problems and check for any markers for domestic violence and post natal depression.
Me - 22 | DH - 32 | Married - 24 May 2014 DS - January 2014
TTC#2 - December 2015
BFP - 6 March 2016 | MC Confirmed - 21 March 2016 TTCAL | April 2016 CP | June 2016 CP | July 2016
After reading all of your posts, I want to ask him to request FMLA. We can go a month without pay, seeing as we will be with my mom at her house. I'd really like him to bond with our first child. I think that would be really special. And why not take advantage of all the help we'll get?
Hmm, now I have more to keep me up at night lol
The nice thing about FMLA is once you have the papers submitted related to an event it is good for a year (I am 99% sure). So if you are looking to go back to work and your daycare spot isn't open or you want to keep baby at home a little longer he can always use the leave then too. Just having it completed and on file isn't a bad insurance plan.
@WombThereItIs & @CarmCeG I know at least at my work that FMLA is good for a year, which is how I can use all of my paid leave (sick/vacation roughly 8.5 weeks, short term disability is also looped in there but it happens at the same time, not added on which sucks) for FMLA and then spread out the rest of the year for appointments or if I just want to have a day off with the little guy.
ETA: I haven't had a chance to really talk with H about his time off again. I'm really leaning towards getting him to be okay with a week off whether he uses his sick or vacation time. I think he even qualifies for FMLA, but it is unpaid and we can't afford that. I'm going to have him look into it because they can't deny him. He had a friend/coworker who used to work there want time off for when his baby was born and they literally only let him take the day, maybe day after too, the baby was born. Ridiculous! I really want him to fight, so I'm hoping he will! It's just been a rough week and I haven't been up for adding more emotional stuff, like I'm not already thinking about it...anyway, just wanted to provide the update since I'm the OP and truly appreciated hearing everyone's experiences and what their plans are this time! Thank you!!
"A day without laughter is a day wasted." ~Charlie Chaplin
Last time DH worked the 4 days (he did half days) I was in the post partum room. With the twins in NICU I didn't need help, and I was used to him not being there while I was in Antepartum. His work made him take the 2 weeks of leave the day I was released, we were originally thinking he could work until they started coming home but it all worked out. He was home for about a week with the twins home and it wasn't that bad, I've also erased that time from my memory so it could have been worse, who knows.
This time he was planning on taking 2 weeks but they had some changes and might only take a week in may, but also take a week in June, and a week in July. I also want to take a small local beach resort vacation in July but we will play that one by ear.
@WombThereItIs@BabyMC517 Wow thanks for the info. I will definitely be talking to him about it. He said that he would ask his HR department about the process today. I honestly don't know why I didn't think of this before, but I'm glad you all made a thread for it
Re: Bringing Home baby
Right now the plan is for DH to take a week off, but his boss told him that they would be flexible and if he needed more we could arrange something at the time.
With DD he took a full week off and it was too many people taking care of baby. I felt 100% from the moment my epidural wore off and both of our moms live within 15 minutes of our house. We all got a little stir crazy.
@bacorrea @WombThereItIs Did you see that in the new defense act for 2017 that was signed that
"Under regulations prescribed by the Secretary of Defense, a member of the armed forces described in subsection (i)(2) who is the secondary caregiver in the case of the birth of a child or the adoption of a child is allowed up to 21 days of leave to be used in connection with such birth or adoption."
Sooo it did officially pass, but the likelyhood of it being implemented in new regulations from Sec. of Defense before our May due dates? Probably slim to none right?
Sweet Baby H 12.21.11
Sassy Baby P 03.26.14
Little Brother Due 05.22.17
May '17 labor memes
Sweet Baby H 12.21.11
Sassy Baby P 03.26.14
Little Brother Due 05.22.17
Hmmm I haven't heard about that at all. DH will
be taking "normal" leave though (as long as he is approved) because he is in TX and we are in VA until I get cleared 6 weeks after birth. We will know more next week when he checks into his new BN.
B born 7/15/13, C born 3/2/15, #3 on the way May '17
I’m a modern man, a man for the millennium. Digital and smoke free. A diversified multi-cultural, post-modern deconstruction that is anatomically and ecologically incorrect. I’ve been up linked and downloaded, I’ve been inputted and outsourced, I know the upside of downsizing, I know the downside of upgrading. I’m a high-tech low-life. A cutting edge, state-of-the-art bi-coastal multi-tasker and I can give you a gigabyte in a nanosecond! I’m new wave, but I’m old school and my inner child is outward bound. I’m a hot-wired, heat seeking, warm-hearted cool customer, voice activated and bio-degradable. I interface with my database, my database is in cyberspace, so I’m interactive, I’m hyperactive and from time to time I’m radioactive.
FTM question: How long are you not allowed to drive with a C-section? Do people who deliver vaginally have driving restrictions as well?
docs will say not to drive even after a vaginal delivery too though.
May '17 labor memes
This time we are really hoping for 2 weeks off, but he works for a small company and won't get any actual leave. Unfortunately it's during a really busy time, but they'll survive. Luckily we also have both sets of parents in town, and I plan to send the toddler to respective grandparents houses at least 2 days a week or for partial days to help keep him in a routine.
Someone with more letters after their name can fact check me but I recall it has something to do with increased risk of uterine rupture in the case of an accident.
May '17 labor memes
I wasn't told about any driving restrictions after either of my vaginal deliveries, but don't forget you really aren't driving by yourself because your not supposed to be lifting anything heavier than your infant... so no lifting that car seat in and out of the car!
Sweet Baby H 12.21.11
Sassy Baby P 03.26.14
Little Brother Due 05.22.17
I wasn't given any driving restrictions, once discharged from hospital they legally cannot stop you (different country different laws though) once you leave hospital you must be capable of returning to "normal duties" which includes driving, otherwise the hospital is liable if you get in an accident.
I still cannot imagine driving less than a week after giving birth vaginally though, but in saying that all my cars are manual with heavy clutches, so that's where that comes from. If I had an automatic I would probably drive home from hospital.
DS - January 2014
TTCAL | April 2016
CP | June 2016
CP | July 2016
Purely out of curiosity, how long is a hospital stay after birth there? You're in Australia, right?
May17 Siggy Challenge
Labor
DS - January 2014
TTCAL | April 2016
CP | June 2016
CP | July 2016
Married 8/27/2011
BFP #1 9/28/2011 DS born 5/22/2012
BFP #2 4/24/2013 m/c 4/25/2013 at 4w
BFP #3 1/31/2014 DD born 10/14/2014
BFP #4 1/20/2016 m/c 2/12/2014 at 7w2d
BFP #5 8/19/2016 DS2 born 4/29/2017
BFP #6 3/7/2018 EDD 11/18/2018
Im not sure what I will do this time, I think I'll still want at least 2 nights I don't feel comfortable with "have baby, go home" we also have home visits 3 times in the first 2 weeks.
sometimes I think it's overkill but I'd rather too much care than not enough
DS - January 2014
TTCAL | April 2016
CP | June 2016
CP | July 2016
Married 8/27/2011
BFP #1 9/28/2011 DS born 5/22/2012
BFP #2 4/24/2013 m/c 4/25/2013 at 4w
BFP #3 1/31/2014 DD born 10/14/2014
BFP #4 1/20/2016 m/c 2/12/2014 at 7w2d
BFP #5 8/19/2016 DS2 born 4/29/2017
BFP #6 3/7/2018 EDD 11/18/2018
Wow, lots of good advice, ladies.
I really enjoy learning how different all of your experiences were. I've thought more of how long I'd like my fiancé to stay at home with me. I was really thinking a week was more than enough, but now I'm not so sure.
As of right now, we both agreed a week would be fine. Luckily, his boss told us that he will allow SO to let him know when he'd need it (post baby or a week after baby is born).
After reading all of your posts, I want to ask him to request FMLA. We can go a month without pay, seeing as we will be with my mom at her house. I'd really like him to bond with our first child. I think that would be really special. And why not take advantage of all the help we'll get?
Hmm, now I have more to keep me up at night lol
23 y/o;
[05/06/17]
First time mommy
90% of the way there
DS - January 2014
TTCAL | April 2016
CP | June 2016
CP | July 2016
May '17 labor memes
ETA: I haven't had a chance to really talk with H about his time off again. I'm really leaning towards getting him to be okay with a week off whether he uses his sick or vacation time. I think he even qualifies for FMLA, but it is unpaid and we can't afford that. I'm going to have him look into it because they can't deny him. He had a friend/coworker who used to work there want time off for when his baby was born and they literally only let him take the day, maybe day after too, the baby was born. Ridiculous! I really want him to fight, so I'm hoping he will! It's just been a rough week and I haven't been up for adding more emotional stuff, like I'm not already thinking about it...anyway, just wanted to provide the update since I'm the OP and truly appreciated hearing everyone's experiences and what their plans are this time! Thank you!!
"A day without laughter is a day wasted." ~Charlie Chaplin
This time he was planning on taking 2 weeks but they had some changes and might only take a week in may, but also take a week in June, and a week in July. I also want to take a small local beach resort vacation in July but we will play that one by ear.
1/7/2015 Twins born @ 34 weeks
23 y/o;
[05/06/17]
First time mommy
90% of the way there