I also also gave in and tried the sex last night. Nothing happened so boo. But it was all fine until everything was over. H gets up to get a towel and turns his head to the side and says "I can't believe you're going to push a human being out of there." I was like yep. That's how it works. And he finally came full circle with "I guess I can picture it, your hips have gotten wider so it'll probably be fine." Thanks babe. Obviously, he's truly mastered the art of romance.
We have gone hiking, and I ate spicy food, but nothing is going on. Several months ago my husband giggled during sex and told me it was "awkward" so I've been pretty self conscious about sex since then. Plus like others have mentioned, I'm pretty sure my husband knowing the Dr can feel baby's head ended any and all chances of it happening.
@jstringfellow19 anything I've heard/read says that orgasms will cause you to contract, and the contractions could potentially lead to labor... also if he leaves it in vs pulling out, the semen is supposed to have something it that helps soften the cervix.
@LivingLaVidaGinger lmao. I was adamant about him not looking at it during labor! Lol. I was like you can see baby once he's out, but eyes up here buddy. Guess he held up that request because he didn't even realize I tore or now have a scar. Lol my mom on the other hand was all about seeing the Miracle of birth.
New strategy-triggering labor through the making of plans! Paid $15 for prenatal yoga tomorrow night (nonredundable), we have a Blue Apron coming Friday (too late to cancel), and tomorrow I'll take our dog's sample to the vet for testing (his expensive 6-month fecal at the place where we will board him expires 2/15).
Also encouraging-there is a big, sudden public event planned for today at 4:00 5 minutes from my delivery hospital that, combined with normal work traffic, promises to basically shut down the city traffic-wise and triple my H's afternoon commute. Really good time to hit active labor, right?
@Gretchypoo do you feel like any of the OWT helped during the actual labor. I know it's probably impossible to tell.
Also i want more of your birth story. Like all the juicy deets. I am hoping to have a earthy crunchy hippie birth at a hospital myself. I am in interested in all your thoughts and feelings, if you aren't too tired and care to share.
Me: 36, H: 37 FTM, 2 Furbabies married 03/17/07 lived in Houston, Austin, Los Angeles and NYC due: 2/15/17
I second wanting to hear more about @Gretchypoo 's birth! As another FTM going for med free if possible, I would love to hear about your thoughts as well.
It's a full moon tonight. So I had spicy Mexican food for dinner and I'm going to take a long bath while I listen to crunchy guided meditation in an attempt to mentally will myself into labor because walking up and down stairs sideways just isn't cutting it anymore.
I tried once for a med free birth at a hospital. It went out the door an hour after I arrived and I was bedridden due to high bp and laying in that bed put the contractions solely in my back.
I do think EPO orally helped make my cervix stretchy. I technically never got to 10cm...it was push at 9.5cm (minor lip left) with some help guiding or have a c section. The stretchiness of my cervix allowed a nurse to essentially push the lip out of the way as I pushed the baby.
@krob how did you handle pain during labor? transition? I moved around a lot early on and that helped baby move from sunny side up to a better position. When they broke my water the contractions go so intense, so suddenly that it shook my whole body.
I handled the pain by vocalizing, relaxing my whole body, keeping the room dark/quiet, moving when I felt I needed to and trying different positions. I kept telling myself pain is good bc it is getting me to my baby.
Honestly, moaning through contractions helped me focus on relaxing my whole body. My Bradley Instructor (and doula- same person) told me that relaxing your body just lets it progress and helps your contractions. It helped with the pain too. i had practiced relaxation techniques by downloading the "calm app" which leads you through whole body relaxation. I was able to identify where I was holding tension and relax those muscles.
First I tried laying on my side, then the shower. I stood and leaned against H or the wall of the shower. I intoned during contractions. The warm water helped but I got over heated and threw up. I also got tired from standing so long so I knew we needed a new position. I tried a bunch of positions, they were terrible. Then we found the chair. I was able to actually sleep between some of the contractions there
The moaning, relaxation and Finding a position where I could relax between contractions is the only thing that got me through transition. Honestly, though, I didn't even know I was in transition because I dilated 4 cm in 2 hours... In retrospect it seems obvious- it was the only time I told H "I don't think I can do this."
He and my doula helped me through that by just being supportive and telling me how great I was doing. 20 min later I was at 9 cm. 10 min later I was pushing.
in what ways was doula helpful aside from suggestion new position at end? Suggesting laboring positions, working with H to keep him calm (he has diagnosed anxiety disorder), rubbing my back, suggesting ways to have H help me, putting my hair in a pony tail, making me laugh, taking pictures of me and H while I labored. She also answered my questions, helped me think of questions (esp when we were considering breaking my water vs staying on a high dose of pit) and made me feel good about my decisions.
did you push in multiple positions? yes. like @kswiger06 when they wanted to check me bc I "sounded like I was pushing" and I refused. I was getting sick of that nurse ;-( I told them i wasn't pushing bc getting on my back for those checks really made the contractions worse. But after 3 pushes I realized I was pushing and let them check me. Yay no cervix! I was shocked bc I had just been at 9cm and literally said "oh, thank god."
I started on hands and knees until the midwife could get there. She recommended I move to the squat bar to move the baby down. That felt so much better but was completely exhausting. I did that until she was crowning. My midwife put warm water and pressure on my perineum to prevent tearing. Then, when she was crowning they moved me to my side. Moving while pushing hurts <- possibly the understatement of the century. That was the only time I screamed. Everything else was gutteral/primal or intoning.
how was H most helpful? H was my rock. He was always within arms reach. He literally held med up if I needed it. He kept me calm. He told me how strong I am and how proud of me he was. He was my biggest advocate-- like, when I was pushing there was a huge clock staring at me across the wall. I knew it would drive me crazy to know howblong I was pushing. So I asked that it be taken down. He climbed over medical equipment to rip itnoff the wall. And he sat behind me between pushes to help me relax. Him just being there made me feel better. And when Betty was born he was the first person I looked for. He was crying and so happy- it was awesome.
@Gretchypoo thank you for sharing. it was all super helpful. and girl i am so proud of you considering you had to be induced.
I love image of H climbing over things to take the clock down. The clock would likely drive me crazy also. It's like when I'm at the gym on the treadmill and somehow my eye finds the clock on the wall. I know then that I am screwed.
Me: 36, H: 37 FTM, 2 Furbabies married 03/17/07 lived in Houston, Austin, Los Angeles and NYC due: 2/15/17
I'll piggyback off of what @Gretchypoo said- low guttural moans during contractions helped relax my rectum which in turn made contractions more efficient. I didn't yell until the ring of fire but I moaned a LOT throughout my entire labor. Yogic breathing for the win.
Moving positions frequently was my saving grace for a shorter labor, every 40mins or so I'd switch it up, unless I was laboring in the birthing tub and I switched positions every other contraction. DH was a rockstar with putting pressure on my tailbone every time a rush would hit.
I hit 8cm in the tub and labored only another 15 mins before I got out and pushed. I was nearly crowning as I walked (i.e. Was dragged) to the bed, pushing was only 20 mins but I ended up doing it all on my back which surprised me because all my visualizations had me on all fours or squatting. That was also helpful for me because they brought me a mirror to watch the whole debacle and that was really motivating too. By the time it was time to push my body was naturally pushing anyways with every contraction so it seemed intuitive just to continue listening to my body and doing whatever it took. DH was really amazing, he had read the book "The Birthing Partner" so he became my defacto doula and he was spot on in his support. I highly recommend that book! Especially since I had read Ina May's 'Guide To Childbirth,' they pair together well.
@Xstatic3333 I know it's tough but try to stay positive. My first was 5 days early so imagine my surprise when my second was 8 days late. It was really difficult emotionally. Have you and H gone on a nice date lately? Maybe a tiny glass of wine? Are you on the labor ball a lot? I watched Pitch Perfect like 7 times on that damn ball. At some point I set an alarm on My phone to take a capsule of EPO and insert one vaginally every half hour. I think that was two nights before, but when she came after date night Shen came FAST. We also drove around the hospital 3x for luck. I'm sorry honey. I wish I could help!
DD1- Aug11 Angel Baby- June13, said goodbye Oct12 DD2- Aug13 DD3- due Feb17
Thanks @peachesnbean. It is really, really tough, and it's the type of emotionally tough you feel guilty for feeling because you don't even get to this point unless it's been a pretty smooth pregnancy. We can't really do a date night since we had some financial surprises last week (heater service) but we have a Blue Apron coming tonight so that'll be a fun at home activity. I never really started EPO, but I'm trying to stay on my feet as much as possible. It is very slippery here right now so walking outside is a no go but I've been walking up and down the stairs whenever I get up to do anything and I feel that pushing him lower. My doula brought up castor oil today but I don't think I'm comfortable with it.
Yes, tiny glasses of beer have also happened
8 days late seems pretty common! It's one reason I want to put off induction until 41+2, to give 41+1 a chance. My midwives are fine with this. They'd even let me go to 42, but I just don't have it in me.
@Xstatic3333 try the EPO before the castor oil! It has prostaglandin properties so the direct application and it in your system may help. I'm thinking of you. ❤
DD1- Aug11 Angel Baby- June13, said goodbye Oct12 DD2- Aug13 DD3- due Feb17
@Xstatic3333 my heart just goes out to you, like you're on mile 26.1 of a marathon with .1 to go and so emotionally and physically exhausted, I just want to hug you ❤️ Without jostling or annoying you of course
@Gretchypoo don't give me too much credit, DH was basically body dragging me lmao, my feet were refusing to move past a drunk snails pace
Thanks guys! Picked up some EPO today. I think I'm just going to take it orally since sex is still manageable for us and it definitely sounds like inserting it would kibosh any hope of keeping that going!
Thanks guys! Picked up some EPO today. I think I'm just going to take it orally since sex is still manageable for us and it definitely sounds like inserting it would kibosh any hope of keeping that going!
Honestly? Insert it like 30 minutes before you dtd and it would help lube.
DD1- Aug11 Angel Baby- June13, said goodbye Oct12 DD2- Aug13 DD3- due Feb17
Thanks guys! Picked up some EPO today. I think I'm just going to take it orally since sex is still manageable for us and it definitely sounds like inserting it would kibosh any hope of keeping that going!
Honestly? Insert it like 30 minutes before you dtd and it would help lube.
Do the capsules just melt up there? Me=newb. I have googled it, just finding conflicting info.
@Xstatic3333 they dissolve or you can poke the capsule to let the oil out. And they don't mean you can't have sex-- do all the things, girl! If u have sex after inserting epo h's penis will get the oil to ur cervix.
Thanks guys! Picked up some EPO today. I think I'm just going to take it orally since sex is still manageable for us and it definitely sounds like inserting it would kibosh any hope of keeping that going!
Honestly? Insert it like 30 minutes before you dtd and it would help lube.
Do the capsules just melt up there? Me=newb. I have googled it, just finding conflicting info.
They melt. Like gretchypoo said you can poke a hole and speed the process up
DD1- Aug11 Angel Baby- June13, said goodbye Oct12 DD2- Aug13 DD3- due Feb17
@Xstatic3333 i used the EPO as lube on H. It definitely "worked". Had 12 hours of contractions starting almost immediately. Now obvi they've gone nowhere but def worth a try especially if you are already DTD.
Me: 36, H: 37 FTM, 2 Furbabies married 03/17/07 lived in Houston, Austin, Los Angeles and NYC due: 2/15/17
Oooo happy Zumbaing @peachesnbean! I'm impressed. I can only barely do yoga anymore. So much pelvic pain with any movement.
EPO as lube got a hard no from H. He kind of hates that I'm taking it at all (very skeptical of anything homeopathic) but I do actually feel like my cervix may have relaxed a bit yesterday. I thought I had lost my MP a few days ago but a bit more arrived this morning. Postdates testing and choosing an induction date all goes down tomorrow. Mentally I'm a mess and I just want my baby.
Re: Old Wives Thread
DD1- Aug11 Angel Baby- June13, said goodbye Oct12 DD2- Aug13 DD3- due Feb17
I was like yep. That's how it works. And he finally came full circle with "I guess I can picture it, your hips have gotten wider so it'll probably be fine."
Thanks babe. Obviously, he's truly mastered the art of romance.
@jstringfellow19 anything I've heard/read says that orgasms will cause you to contract, and the contractions could potentially lead to labor... also if he leaves it in vs pulling out, the semen is supposed to have something it that helps soften the cervix.
Also encouraging-there is a big, sudden public event planned for today at 4:00 5 minutes from my delivery hospital that, combined with normal work traffic, promises to basically shut down the city traffic-wise and triple my H's afternoon commute. Really good time to hit active labor, right?
Also i want more of your birth story. Like all the juicy deets. I am hoping to have a earthy crunchy hippie birth at a hospital myself. I am in interested in all your thoughts and feelings, if you aren't too tired and care to share.
FTM, 2 Furbabies
married 03/17/07
lived in Houston, Austin, Los Angeles and NYC
due: 2/15/17
I'm happy to share details- anything in particular you want to know?
I do think EPO orally helped make my cervix stretchy. I technically never got to 10cm...it was push at 9.5cm (minor lip left) with some help guiding or have a c section. The stretchiness of my cervix allowed a nurse to essentially push the lip out of the way as I pushed the baby.
in what ways was doula helpful aside from suggestion new position at end?
did you push in multiple positions?
how was H most helpful?
FTM, 2 Furbabies
married 03/17/07
lived in Houston, Austin, Los Angeles and NYC
due: 2/15/17
how did you handle pain during labor? transition?
I moved around a lot early on and that helped baby move from sunny side up to a better position. When they broke my water the contractions go so intense, so suddenly that it shook my whole body.
I handled the pain by vocalizing, relaxing my whole body, keeping the room dark/quiet, moving when I felt I needed to and trying different positions. I kept telling myself pain is good bc it is getting me to my baby.
Honestly, moaning through contractions helped me focus on relaxing my whole body. My Bradley Instructor (and doula- same person) told me that relaxing your body just lets it progress and helps your contractions. It helped with the pain too. i had practiced relaxation techniques by downloading the "calm app" which leads you through whole body relaxation. I was able to identify where I was holding tension and relax those muscles.
First I tried laying on my side, then the shower. I stood and leaned against H or the wall of the shower. I intoned during contractions. The warm water helped but I got over heated and threw up. I also got tired from standing so long so I knew we needed a new position. I tried a bunch of positions, they were terrible. Then we found the chair. I was able to actually sleep between some of the contractions there
The moaning, relaxation and Finding a position where I could relax between contractions is the only thing that got me through transition. Honestly, though, I didn't even know I was in transition because I dilated 4 cm in 2 hours... In retrospect it seems obvious- it was the only time I told H "I don't think I can do this."
He and my doula helped me through that by just being supportive and telling me how great I was doing. 20 min later I was at 9 cm. 10 min later I was pushing.
in what ways was doula helpful aside from suggestion new position at end?
Suggesting laboring positions, working with H to keep him calm (he has diagnosed anxiety disorder), rubbing my back, suggesting ways to have H help me, putting my hair in a pony tail, making me laugh, taking pictures of me and H while I labored. She also answered my questions, helped me think of questions (esp when we were considering breaking my water vs staying on a high dose of pit) and made me feel good about my decisions.
did you push in multiple positions?
yes. like @kswiger06 when they wanted to check me bc I "sounded like I was pushing" and I refused. I was getting sick of that nurse ;-( I told them i wasn't pushing bc getting on my back for those checks really made the contractions worse. But after 3 pushes I realized I was pushing and let them check me. Yay no cervix! I was shocked bc I had just been at 9cm and literally said "oh, thank god."
I started on hands and knees until the midwife could get there. She recommended I move to the squat bar to move the baby down. That felt so much better but was completely exhausting. I did that until she was crowning. My midwife put warm water and pressure on my perineum to prevent tearing. Then, when she was crowning they moved me to my side. Moving while pushing hurts <- possibly the understatement of the century. That was the only time I screamed. Everything else was gutteral/primal or intoning.
how was H most helpful?
H was my rock. He was always within arms reach. He literally held med up if I needed it. He kept me calm. He told me how strong I am and how proud of me he was. He was my biggest advocate-- like, when I was pushing there was a huge clock staring at me across the wall. I knew it would drive me crazy to know howblong I was pushing. So I asked that it be taken down. He climbed over medical equipment to rip itnoff the wall. And he sat behind me between pushes to help me relax. Him just being there made me feel better. And when Betty was born he was the first person I looked for. He was crying and so happy- it was awesome.
I love image of H climbing over things to take the clock down. The clock would likely drive me crazy also. It's like when I'm at the gym on the treadmill and somehow my eye finds the clock on the wall. I know then that I am screwed.
FTM, 2 Furbabies
married 03/17/07
lived in Houston, Austin, Los Angeles and NYC
due: 2/15/17
Moving positions frequently was my saving grace for a shorter labor, every 40mins or so I'd switch it up, unless I was laboring in the birthing tub and I switched positions every other contraction. DH was a rockstar with putting pressure on my tailbone every time a rush would hit.
I hit 8cm in the tub and labored only another 15 mins before I got out and pushed. I was nearly crowning as I walked (i.e. Was dragged) to the bed, pushing was only 20 mins but I ended up doing it all on my back which surprised me because all my visualizations had me on all fours or squatting. That was also helpful for me because they brought me a mirror to watch the whole debacle and that was really motivating too. By the time it was time to push my body was naturally pushing anyways with every contraction so it seemed intuitive just to continue listening to my body and doing whatever it took. DH was really amazing, he had read the book "The Birthing Partner" so he became my defacto doula and he was spot on in his support. I highly recommend that book! Especially since I had read Ina May's 'Guide To Childbirth,' they pair together well.
@Xstatic3333 I hope your baby comes soon. Silly LO is way too comfy in there ;-)
DD1- Aug11 Angel Baby- June13, said goodbye Oct12 DD2- Aug13 DD3- due Feb17
Yes, tiny glasses of beer have also happened
8 days late seems pretty common! It's one reason I want to put off induction until 41+2, to give 41+1 a chance. My midwives are fine with this. They'd even let me go to 42, but I just don't have it in me.
DD1- Aug11 Angel Baby- June13, said goodbye Oct12 DD2- Aug13 DD3- due Feb17
@Gretchypoo don't give me too much credit, DH was basically body dragging me lmao, my feet were refusing to move past a drunk snails pace
DD1- Aug11 Angel Baby- June13, said goodbye Oct12 DD2- Aug13 DD3- due Feb17
DD1- Aug11 Angel Baby- June13, said goodbye Oct12 DD2- Aug13 DD3- due Feb17
FTM, 2 Furbabies
married 03/17/07
lived in Houston, Austin, Los Angeles and NYC
due: 2/15/17
DD1- Aug11 Angel Baby- June13, said goodbye Oct12 DD2- Aug13 DD3- due Feb17
EPO as lube got a hard no from H. He kind of hates that I'm taking it at all (very skeptical of anything homeopathic) but I do actually feel like my cervix may have relaxed a bit yesterday. I thought I had lost my MP a few days ago but a bit more arrived this morning. Postdates testing and choosing an induction date all goes down tomorrow. Mentally I'm a mess and I just want my baby.
DD1- Aug11 Angel Baby- June13, said goodbye Oct12 DD2- Aug13 DD3- due Feb17