Plan: Make it out in one piece with a baby. Dream: Vaginal birth and to qualify for an epidural. I have no control over this and probably will not qualify again this time due to low platelets, but a girl can dream! They sound so magical!!
My plan is to head the hospital on a pre-appointed day, get the drugs, get sliced open, have a baby wrangled out, then enjoy a glorious 4 night stay in the most awesome hotel hospital around.
This. Except my stay will only be 48 hours, barring any complications
@kat81 I'm thinking about a birth center and a midwife too! The center I'm looking at is three blocks from the hospital but I am still worried about something going wrong. I called and asked and they said they do quarterly drills with the hospital and the EMS teams to practice a situation with mom and situation with baby and they've never had a situation where mom goes in an ambulance and goes straight to the OR - but it is a very new center.
My biggest concern is actually about not having the epidural available. I was one of those people who actually had labor speed up once I got the epidural because I could finally relax. I worry that I'll have a worse experience this time if I can't get the epidural. But the birth center seems really wonderful and I like the more holistic approach of the midwives, but I don't know if I can do it.
I have done one birth with an epidural (well, only at the every end -- 9 cm) and another without. Sure, it's "cool" to say that I went med-free, but what the hell is the point? If an epidural helped you progress then it was absolutely the right thing for you. There's this idea out there that epidurals automatically slow people down because perhaps on average they do. But they are actually beneficial to some people! (not taking into account the obvious pain relief benefit) I feel like typing this is talking myself out of the birth center! No I'm pretty certain on doing it and I have done the birth med-free so I know I can...as long as the baby isn't positioned weirdly or something odd like that happens. But I liked having an epidural, too. I just hated the OB...a lot. And all of the OBs in that practice SUCKED. I am so strongly converted to midwifery that it guides the rest of the decision for me. But the lack of the hospital is a bit frightening, even if it is so nearby (you still have to get there!)
I think the key is to have a caregiver who knows what you want. I had a pretty detailed plan for my first that went out the window cause my labor was so darn long, but my midwife was so supportive throughout and never pushed anything that wasn't necessary. My goal this time is another safe vaginal delivery. I think I'd like to try without drugs, but I know the magic of an epidural and won't be ashamed to get one again.
I'm probably just going to go to the hospital when the time comes. We'll have established if DH wants to cut the cord, that I'll likely want an epidural, etc. but nothing too detailed. This will be my first birth so I honestly don't even know really what to expect. I'll just be hoping for the best.
I'm a HUGE planner, excel spreadsheets for everything. My birth plan though? Have a healthy baby. I know how frustrated I get when my plans don't go my way and I know birth has lots of factors that can throw the best laid plans out the window, so no real plan for me. I have some things in mind once baby is out, but whatever goes goes. Just keep us okay.
and now that I've finished reading, I suppose I have a "dream plan": go into labor naturally, go to a hospital (a must for me), either get an epi or don't (I just don't know!), push a baby out (no vacuum or forceps), no cutting (if possible), immediate skin to skin, delayed cord clamping, immediate breast feeding.
@SparkySunDevil@emilyalso I'm right there with you! I stayed until the 4th day last time too... it was so nice not to have to clean the house or cook, and to have help with our DD. I intend to stay as long as they let me this time too
I had an Idea of what I wanted last time but there was nothing that i was too adamant about, thank goodness because it didn't go that way at all. I hope some of y'alls plans work out but to me, quite a few seem wayyyyy too planned out. I'm not trying to be negative, but I feel like planning that much will just stress you out because something will most definitely not go your way. If we had been doing a home birth I can only imagine what would have happened to me and my baby. So even though a c-section isn't ideal I'm so so thankful they can do that. You might want to read up on your options with c-sections too, just in case you end up needing one.
@SparkySunDevil@emilyalso I'm right there with you! I stayed until the 4th day last time too... it was so nice not to have to clean the house or cook, and to have help with our DD. I intend to stay as long as they let me this time too
I had an Idea of what I wanted last time but there was nothing that i was too adamant about, thank goodness because it didn't go that way at all. I hope some of y'alls plans work out but to me, quite a few seem wayyyyy too planned out. I'm not trying to be negative, but I feel like planning that much will just stress you out because something will most definitely not go your way. If we had been doing a home birth I can only imagine what would have happened to me and my baby. So even though a c-section isn't ideal I'm so so thankful they can do that. You might want to read up on your options with c-sections too, just in case you end up needing one.
This is just what we want our births to be in dream world. I'm not stupid enough to think it'll all go the way I want it. My main real life plans are to have skin to skin ASAP, breast feed, and be uninterrupted with baby for the first hour.
More time in the hospital would be amazing to just rest. Our first we had tons of visitors. The second came during flu season so only grandparents and younger siblings could visit. It was so nice to rest and bond with baby. Both were a vaginal birth/ no complications- the nurses were quick to kick us out (guessing due to insurance). I would of loved a bit more time... The last I think we were only there for 32 hrs.
@WildflowersandFerns - I was on Lovenox for my last pregnancy and this one as well. The plan was to do the same thing for me as they did for @Kipperoo and I did start herparin near the end of my pregnancy as well. I was a little bit of a weird situation because DD was breach so I knew I was having a c-section and had a date picked but my water broke a week early! The heparin leaves your system much quicker than Lovenox!
Someone mentioned their DH possibly cutting the cord and reminded me of a hilarious story. This was part of our birth plan the first time around (and will be this time as well). The doctor who ended up delivering my son was such a B. Out of the 6 doctors in my practice, she's the only one I cannot stand. She was really rude to the amazing nursing staff, as well as to myself and my husband. When my son was born, she asked my husband if he wanted to cut the cord. When he said yes, she impatiently barked "Okay, then cut it!" and handed him scissors- no further direction. Well, he cut it...but not in between the clamps. Blood sprayed ALL over her! It was awesome.
Fur daughter: 02/2011 Human sons: 11/2015 & 05/2017 *formerly kayemjay*
@kat81 I'm thinking about a birth center and a midwife too! The center I'm looking at is three blocks from the hospital but I am still worried about something going wrong. I called and asked and they said they do quarterly drills with the hospital and the EMS teams to practice a situation with mom and situation with baby and they've never had a situation where mom goes in an ambulance and goes straight to the OR - but it is a very new center.
My biggest concern is actually about not having the epidural available. I was one of those people who actually had labor speed up once I got the epidural because I could finally relax. I worry that I'll have a worse experience this time if I can't get the epidural. But the birth center seems really wonderful and I like the more holistic approach of the midwives, but I don't know if I can do it.
I have done one birth with an epidural (well, only at the every end -- 9 cm) and another without. Sure, it's "cool" to say that I went med-free, but what the hell is the point? If an epidural helped you progress then it was absolutely the right thing for you. There's this idea out there that epidurals automatically slow people down because perhaps on average they do. But they are actually beneficial to some people! (not taking into account the obvious pain relief benefit) I feel like typing this is talking myself out of the birth center! No I'm pretty certain on doing it and I have done the birth med-free so I know I can...as long as the baby isn't positioned weirdly or something odd like that happens. But I liked having an epidural, too. I just hated the OB...a lot. And all of the OBs in that practice SUCKED. I am so strongly converted to midwifery that it guides the rest of the decision for me. But the lack of the hospital is a bit frightening, even if it is so nearby (you still have to get there!)
I'm actually kind of in the same boat as you. I don't have a strong desire for a med-free birth because the epidural was such a good experience for me last time. However, I don't love the idea of an OB and a hospital again and the only other option is a birth center - there are no midwives that deliver at the hospital near me. I ended up with an episiotomy during DS's birth and while it may have been necessary, I'm not totally sure. I also didn't like they way it went down (he didn't even tell me, just did it). I am with a different practice now, but I still feel a little gun shy about an OB in a hospital. The epidural is the main thing keeping me at the OB practice, although I am encouraged by the fact that the birth center has nitrous oxide which I hear can help. Does anyone have experience with forgoing the epidural but using NO instead?
For those who want immediate skin to skin/nursing/no bath:
Great if it can happen, but honestly, don't put too much stock in any of these. I was completely drugged out for my emergency c-section and did not get to hold DD until well over an hour after birth. When they finally put her in my arms in the recovery room (I was coherent at that point), she looked right into my eyes and we had the most precious, magical, special moment that I will never forget (and I am not a mushy person at all, this is no exaggeration). We snuggled, she nursed, everything. She and I bonded instantly and I feel like it has been unbroken ever since. We broke every "rule" in the book yet nothing stopped that mother-baby relationship.
For those who want immediate skin to skin/nursing/no bath:
Great if it can happen, but honestly, don't put too much stock in any of these. I was completely drugged out for my emergency c-section and did not get to hold DD until well over an hour after birth. When they finally put her in my arms in the recovery room (I was coherent at that point), she looked right into my eyes and we had the most precious, magical, special moment that I will never forget (and I am not a mushy person at all, this is no exaggeration). We snuggled, she nursed, everything. She and I bonded instantly and I feel like it has been unbroken ever since. We broke every "rule" in the book yet nothing stopped that mother-baby relationship.
This. I am NOT one of those moms that wants my kid on me the second it comes out. Nope....go wipe all that nasty goo off first, please. And for the love of God, make sure the kid is ok. I've waited 9 months to meet the baby....a few more minutes isn't going to hurt me. I've done skin to skin while in recovery, a good hour or more after they're born. And our bond was immediate and strong. More power to those who choose otherwise, but it is not my thing
For those who want immediate skin to skin/nursing/no bath:
Great if it can happen, but honestly, don't put too much stock in any of these. I was completely drugged out for my emergency c-section and did not get to hold DD until well over an hour after birth. When they finally put her in my arms in the recovery room (I was coherent at that point), she looked right into my eyes and we had the most precious, magical, special moment that I will never forget (and I am not a mushy person at all, this is no exaggeration). We snuggled, she nursed, everything. She and I bonded instantly and I feel like it has been unbroken ever since. We broke every "rule" in the book yet nothing stopped that mother-baby relationship.
Thank you for this! I didn't have skin to skin with my first and I did with second. It was so wonderful that second time and I'm already worried it won't happen with this one. It's nice to hear it's possible to still have the same bonding experience even if it happens a little later than planned.
I have a midwife seeing me through my entire pregnancy, so I have the options of home birth vs hospital birth. I plan on taking advantage of having the best of both worlds. I'm going to labour in the comfort of my own home for as long as reasonably possible and then we will go to the hospital to deliver. This is made even more possible by the fact that I live 3 minutes from the hospital on a busy traffic day. (Small town benefits for the win!).
Eta: I also have the option of going home as early as 3 hours after birth (obviously if there's no complications), but I don't plan on going home that early.
Similar to many above, my birth plan is summed up by getting to the hospital and getting the epidural. There is a high probability that I will have cholestasis with this pregnancy (as I did with my last) which would mean I need to be induced at 36 weeks. It's not ideal, but honestly, all I care about is a safe, epidural filled birth with a healthy baby on the other side.
Wildflowers and Ferns , have you talked to your doctor about the process of delivery on blood thinners? I'm not sure what you are on and why, but I am on Lovenox injections twice/day and was with my last pregnancy, too. They switched me to heparin at 35 weeks because it stays in your system for a shorter period of time and is less risky when delivering. They then totally pulled me off the blood thinners when I checked into the hospital for delivery and put me back on them after the baby was born. If you are feeling nervous about it, I would definitely talk to your doctor and understand what the plan is!
Thanks. I am on a similar plan, lovenox for now and heparin later (although I didn't realize I would possibly go off blood thinners once labor started!) I think you're right that I need to get a better explanation from my doctor about the risks and plan. I'm still in the early and overwhelmed and I don't know what's going on at all stage.
My birth plan is the same as last time- which is no plan. I felt very at ease to just handle things as they came. Personally, having a plan would stress me out bc if something changed it'd be hard to handle for me.
ETA: I did specify whether I'd have an epidural or not.
My birth plan is the same as last time- which is no plan. I felt very at ease to just handle things as they came. Personally, having a plan would stress me out bc if something changed it'd be hard to handle for me.
ETA: I did specify whether I'd have an epidural or not.
I like this attitude. I think a lot of people commenting here thought my plan was so specific and I'd be sad if something changed. That's not the case at all. As someone who has never given birth, I'm realizing how much goes on that I didn't know about. I've also learned that there are so many options. My plan isn't something I incorrectly assume is set in stone. It's just a list of options I'd like to take advantage of, if possible.
@MollyandD : I agree. I think it's nice to have both a "wishlist" of ideals as well as a more generalized smaller set of expectations. That way, you've given yourself the benefit of time to consider your options, do the research, make informed decisions in the comfort of your own home ahead of time (read: while not in labor!), and be up to speed mentally for when issues/choices arise during L&D. Thinking about these points ahead of time is smart for all of us to do. And at the same time, having maybe-less-specific goals as part of a more general gameplan rather than strict expectations would helpfully set the foundation for a less stressful experience, which is what we'd ALL really like to have! A dream wishlist to aim for, coupled with a more laissez-faire "let's get this done!" go-with-the-flow attitude, would probably be the best mind-set going in, and that's what I'm trying to find a balance in. There were a few small choices in my first go-around that I'd like to repeat but others that I'd like to give more thought to before this little one makes an appearance. (It sure is nerve-wracking & fun to think about though, right?!)
My birth plan is the same as last time- which is no plan. I felt very at ease to just handle things as they came. Personally, having a plan would stress me out bc if something changed it'd be hard to handle for me.
ETA: I did specify whether I'd have an epidural or not.
I like this attitude. I think a lot of people commenting here thought my plan was so specific and I'd be sad if something changed. That's not the case at all. As someone who has never given birth, I'm realizing how much goes on that I didn't know about. I've also learned that there are so many options. My plan isn't something I incorrectly assume is set in stone. It's just a list of options I'd like to take advantage of, if possible.
I understand. With #1 I was initially set on a birth plan, but my OB was of a different mentality and I just went with it. Turns out it was the better choice for me, given my personality. I think it's important to do what makes you be at ease but always recognize it'll most likely not go as "planned"- which you are
Yay for home home birth. THat is what we are planning too. Our first was bon at night But s like Ike that this baby to be a day birth so ours four year old can be present
Plan A- VBAC if doc will allow it, I'm on blood thinners so depending on the blood thinner status at time of delivery that might not be an option.
Plan B- a c-section that I don't end up sedated for, I'd really enjoy being awake for the birth of one of my children.
Oh, and if this could happen with a full term baby that requires no NICU time that would be a HUGE bonus. It was almost 12 hours before I got to see my twins in NICU.
My current plan is to be nice to the delivery team, look them directly in the eyes and say, "All I ask is that you really try hard to keep those scissors away from my vagina. Thank you."
No real birth plan other than getting an epidural as soon as they'll give it to me. I will say, I'm going to start doing things to organically induce sooner this time (like 38 weeks). Last time I was 9 days overdue and I would REALLY love to avoid that. I was lucky I didn't have to get induced.
My current plan is to be nice to the delivery team, look them directly in the eyes and say, "All I ask is that you really try hard to keep those scissors away from my vagina. Thank you."
Re: Birth Plan
Dream: Vaginal birth and to qualify for an epidural. I have no control over this and probably will not qualify again this time due to low platelets, but a girl can dream! They sound so magical!!
Also @mdlorenz you are amazing!
DS2 5/17
#3 Due 9/20
Low platelets is such a raw deal. I hope you can meet the threshold to get your epidural!
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Sorry, not trying the hijack the thread. Please accept my apologies fellow posters.
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May '17 labor memes
My goal this time is another safe vaginal delivery. I think I'd like to try without drugs, but I know the magic of an epidural and won't be ashamed to get one again.
Are you from Pennsylvania? There's a town called Hazelton.
Yes! I've driven through it. Haha
eta.... Sorry everyone, I didn't mean to sidetrack this thread.
edited because I tend to be redundant
1st Baby 5/12/17, Henry
1st Baby 5/12/17, Henry
I had an Idea of what I wanted last time but there was nothing that i was too adamant about, thank goodness because it didn't go that way at all. I hope some of y'alls plans work out but to me, quite a few seem wayyyyy too planned out. I'm not trying to be negative, but I feel like planning that much will just stress you out because something will most definitely not go your way. If we had been doing a home birth I can only imagine what would have happened to me and my baby. So even though a c-section isn't ideal I'm so so thankful they can do that. You might want to read up on your options with c-sections too, just in case you end up needing one.
BFP #1 12/23/12 EDD 9/3/13 DD #1 8/26/13
BFP #2 2/25/16 EDD 11/5/16 MMC 4/15/16
BFP #3 8/31/16 EDD 5/12/17 It's a GIRL!
Human sons: 11/2015 & 05/2017
*formerly kayemjay*
Great if it can happen, but honestly, don't put too much stock in any of these. I was completely drugged out for my emergency c-section and did not get to hold DD until well over an hour after birth. When they finally put her in my arms in the recovery room (I was coherent at that point), she looked right into my eyes and we had the most precious, magical, special moment that I will never forget (and I am not a mushy person at all, this is no exaggeration). We snuggled, she nursed, everything. She and I bonded instantly and I feel like it has been unbroken ever since. We broke every "rule" in the book yet nothing stopped that mother-baby relationship.
DD: 6
DS: 2
Eta: I also have the option of going home as early as 3 hours after birth (obviously if there's no complications), but I don't plan on going home that early.
Me: 26 DH: 28
TTC #1 since 06/2014
BFP #1 09/23/15. MMC discovered 11/24/2015
BFP #2 08/24/16 EDD 05/08/17
ETA: I did specify whether I'd have an epidural or not.
Plan B- a c-section that I don't end up sedated for, I'd really enjoy being awake for the birth of one of my children.
Oh, and if this could happen with a full term baby that requires no NICU time that would be a HUGE bonus. It was almost 12 hours before I got to see my twins in NICU.
1/7/2015 Twins born @ 34 weeks
Haha! Totally adding this to my Non-birth plan.
1st Baby 5/12/17, Henry