@JanuarysBaby1 we still rock/bounce until he seems sleepy. DH is better about getting him all the way to the drowsy state than me. I usually just soothe him until he gets all snuggly and put him down.
@JanuarysBaby1 we still rock/bounce until he seems sleepy. DH is better about getting him all the way to the drowsy state than me. I usually just soothe him until he gets all snuggly and put him down.
Does he wake up when you put him down? My LO could be wide awake when I put her down. In that case, would I pick her back up to rock her? Or leave her?
Do you guys still rock to get your LO drowsy and then put them down? And then if they wake you let them cry it out? Or do you put them down awake? Sorry if this was discussed already in this thread. I'm so tired I can't even hit the back button lol
We put her in her crib wide awake. And when she cries we don't pick her up. Just roll her back to her back, put her soother in, say our speech, walk out even if shes still crying. It's worked amazing for us.
Do you guys still rock to get your LO drowsy and then put them down? And then if they wake you let them cry it out? Or do you put them down awake? Sorry if this was discussed already in this thread. I'm so tired I can't even hit the back button lol
We put her in her crib wide awake. And when she cries we don't pick her up. Just roll her back to her back, put her soother in, say our speech, walk out even if shes still crying. It's worked amazing for us.
Yup, this. The principle behind sleep training is that you are teaching them how to go to sleep on their own. If you rescue them when they're upset, they think that is part of what they need to fall asleep. When they no longer need us to fall asleep, then they can start mastering night wakings.
@mestokes, for similar reasons, I would do all naps at once. It's too confusing for baby when the "rules" for some naps are different than others. They don't understand. But if every nap has the same routine, followed by you leaving, then they learn to fall asleep on their own. My LO is actually WAY more upset about naps than bed time, but her hysterics almost always end very suddenly, within 10 minutes.
I have a question that maybe someone here can answer, it's not necessarily CIO related, but definitely sleep training related. We have nights down pretty well with LO going to bed around 6-7, dream feed around 10, then he'll get up around 5:30-6 and eat, then back to bed for another 2-3 hours. For naps we have been using his bouncer in the living room surrounded by the daily household bustle and noise. If he's not in the bouncer it's in the car while we are running errands, in the Ergo, or in the stroller. I have tried naps in his crib while we are home during the day, but he just screams bloody murder and never goes to sleep. So, for the sake of everyone's sanity, I've just kept it to the bouncer. Also, we travel a lot, so I don't want him to be dependent his crib to nap. When he gets older and too big for his bouncer how do I make this transition to sleeping in his crib when we are at home for naps? Has anyone done something like this before? Should I just resign myself to a lot of crying and frustration on both our parts while we transition? Or should I try to use the CIO method until he gets the idea and associates crib with sleep? Thanks for the help ladies!
@Cricket99 we did CIO for naps as well. Generally she only sleeps in her crib for one nap of the day (sometimes more but mainly just one). We are always out and about or at my parents so the rest of her naps are on walks or in her carrier. We did cio naps with nighttime so I think she caught on quicker with them that way, but the first nap took almost an hour of crying and everyone after that had been like 10-25 minutes.
I have a question that maybe someone here can answer, it's not necessarily CIO related, but definitely sleep training related. We have nights down pretty well with LO going to bed around 6-7, dream feed around 10, then he'll get up around 5:30-6 and eat, then back to bed for another 2-3 hours. For naps we have been using his bouncer in the living room surrounded by the daily household bustle and noise. If he's not in the bouncer it's in the car while we are running errands, in the Ergo, or in the stroller. I have tried naps in his crib while we are home during the day, but he just screams bloody murder and never goes to sleep. So, for the sake of everyone's sanity, I've just kept it to the bouncer. Also, we travel a lot, so I don't want him to be dependent his crib to nap. When he gets older and too big for his bouncer how do I make this transition to sleeping in his crib when we are at home for naps? Has anyone done something like this before? Should I just resign myself to a lot of crying and frustration on both our parts while we transition? Or should I try to use the CIO method until he gets the idea and associates crib with sleep? Thanks for the help ladies!
I'm curious about this as well too. My LO currently naps only in her swing, in our living room. I feel like she's getting too big for her swing now and needs to make the transition to her crib soon!
@januarybaby1@Cricket99 do your little ones sleep in the crib at night at all? Or it's just naps that they don't sleep in their crib?
She doesn't sleep in the crib at all. She sleeps in our room in her bassinet still. I know, I'm creating bad habits! I'm looking to transition her soon though, hopefully lol.
@cali1710 Mine is in his crib at night with no problem. We did that transition at 3 months and it was a breeze. Naps, however, are a whole different ball game. He already fights them if he's just in his bouncer, but has no problem if we're out and about. I think I may just have to bite the bullet and do CIO eventually for daytime naps.
@JanuarysBaby1 when we transitioned her to the crib we started with naps just so it was a bit more familiar. So maybe try that? I personally think (could be wrong) putting them in the crib and doing cio is a lot to adjust to. But maybe doing the "rip the bandaid right off" approach would work for yours? Ps I apologize I wasnt using your correct user name to tag you in! So similar haha.
@Cricket99 my LO has always fought naps too. Thats why we had to rock her. She was getting better a few weeks before we did sleep training but I feel cio has helped tremendously for naps. I set a limit for naps that I wouldnt let her cry past (30min) and the first time I had to go in and the second I picked her up she fell asleep and I put her back in the crib. From then on she got better and better. So he may just need to cio a bit for naps too.
@cali1710 no problem! I didn't even realize it lol. Thanks for the advice. I may start just putting her in there for naps and see how that works out. I plan on doing the CIO method this weekend also.
@JanuarysBaby1, you are in the exact same situation I was before sleep training: bassinet at night, swing for naps.
We moved her to the crib because she was moving around too much, and she was sooo upset the first night, even though we did our full, regular routine. After an hour and a half of DH rocking her to sleep, just to have her wake immediately, we traded off and I implemented CIO. Another hour and a half of crying and she finally fell asleep. Night 2 was much better. Night 3 was amazing.
Before CIO, I had been working on the swing. Every few days, I would lower the speed. The day after CIO, I stopped turning the swing on at all. She now sleeps in a motionless swing. Haha. Not perfect but it feels like big progress! I was going to try to move her to the crib this week but I came down with a nasty cold on Sunday night and just don't have it in me right now. So, next week...
I think the consistent sleep routines are very important, especially during transition phases. That's how they know what you expect them to do even when you throw a curveball like a new space. Our bedtime routine is diaper, brush teeth, sleep sack, 2 stories, lights out, put down, white noise on, here's lovey, "night night". Our nap routine is 1 story, lights out, put down, white noise, lovey, night night. She knows by the time I'm putting her down that it's time to sleep! Sonetimes she isn't happy about it but at least she always knows what I'm asking of her.
You guys!!! We had the first perfect night last night! No crying at bedtime, the dream feed or 5 am feed (instead she just babbled to herself), AND she slept from 10:30 to 5:00 without waking once! At 6:30, SO walked into her room and she was already awake and just hanging out quietly. Hallelujah!
@l4rk amazing! Congrats!! I actually noticed that now that she puts herself to sleep she doesn't wake up crying. For both mornings and naps Ive peaked in and shes just hanging out in her crib playing with her paci. No noises. Just laying and rolling around.
Idk what I'm going to do about these naps! He now falls asleep fine at bedtime and the first nap of the day with only whining but the other two naps are just impossible!
Idk what I'm going to do about these naps! He now falls asleep fine at bedtime and the first nap of the day with only whining but the other two naps are just impossible!
Thats good though! I know I'm the same way but her other two naps she cries for a bit then goes to sleep. Usually about 20-30 min. Baby steps.
@kaym6 at least for me this last week has been a hugeee improvement with both naps and night time. We are sleeping through the night again thanks to sleep training! I'm excited that I have at least one good nap! But they are all slowly improving. Cant wait to drop the third nap!
Idk what I'm going to do about these naps! He now falls asleep fine at bedtime and the first nap of the day with only whining but the other two naps are just impossible!
Yes that was us exactly, a couple weeks ago! Now naps are super easy! I think it just took time. It'll get better!
Did yall drop all night feedings when you did CIO? My pediatrician said by 6 months, babies don't need to eat at night, but I can't decide! If you kept any night feedings, did you just decide on a time you wouldn't feed your LO before and have them CIO until they reached that specific time?
Also, did yall notice a change in your LOs personality after sleep training? Like are they generally happier/less fussy?
@mestokes we decided that we'd feed him if he woke up and it had been more than 4 hours since he'd nursed. He regularly sleeps 8-9 hours though, so he doesn't really need it, but he struggled to put on weight, so I'd rather feed him more often if he wants it. He does seem happier and like he's more well rested since we started training
@mestokes we dropped the night feeding when doing CIO. We also were told by the pedi that she can go all night. It took two nights of her waking up for a feeding and us not feeding her for her to drop it. She now eats that little bit more during the day and sleeps 10-13 hours a night without waking up. That being said she only woke up once in the night for food and it was more habit then actual hunger. If she was waking more the once we would have started cutting just one out at a time.
My LO has always been super happy no matter how tired she was so we didnt notice a huge difference but with her naps getting better now with sleep training (we did sleep training with naps at the same time) I feel shes more active during the day. She has more energy I guess.
@mestokes I still feed LO during the night if she wakes and cries for more than 10 minutes and its been more than 4 hours since she ate. This usually ends up being once, but sometimes twice during the night. LO is on the smaller side (was 13th percentile, dropped to 7th, now up to the 9th), so that's why I want to feed her if she wants it. She has been such a happy, energetic baby. Don't know if that's because of sleep training or if that's just who she is.
We are considering starting sleep training soon so I've just re-read all of you guys posts- thanks so much for the info and updates on your progress, it really helps and gives me hope that maybe it will work! I have a few questions though.. for those of you who nurse, do your LOs generally fall asleep/nearly asleep while nursing? I tried to break the nursing to sleep habit so my bedtime routine now is diaper, PJs, nurse, read a story, then set him in crib. Most of the time he is so drowsy when I'm reading the story that I can put him in his crib and he will roll over and settle himself to sleep. If he cries out, I give him the paci and that usually does it. However, he eats once around 3-4 am and I don't know how to avoid him nursing to sleep for this feeding- what are you guys doing? Or do you think it's fine for him to nurse to sleep for this feeding? I am so confused at this point, because there are times we have really good nights- wakes up once to eat, goes back to sleep immediately and sleeps 8 pm to 8 or 8:30 am minus the time he's eating. And then we have other nights where he's up every hour for a few hours, or it takes 1 - 1.5 hours to get him back to sleep, sometimes even after nursing as was the case last night. I try to give him some time after he starts to cry to see if he will settle himself and a few times last night he did, but then 15-20 min later he's up again?? We generally get him back to sleep by giving him his paci and rolling him onto his side while patting his back or head- sometimes this works in 2 minutes, and sometimes not for over 45-60 min and we end up picking him up and rocking for a minute or two before setting him back down to try again. Worst case I end up just holding him if nothing else works. He has two teeth already and sleep was definitely worse while he was cutting those so I don't wan't to make him CIO if this is teething related but he's not nearly as drooly or fussy during the day as he was then so I don't think that's it? For those who have done CIO did your LOs wake again 10-15 min after finally falling asleep? I'm afraid I'll end up listening to him cry for an hour before falling asleep only to have the whole process start over again 10 minutes later
Thanks for listening to my novel, any help/advice is appreciated!
I think it's fine to let your LO nurse to sleep for a middle of the night feeding. That's what I do, and she goes right back to sleep and stays asleep...unless it's a night she wants to eat twice, but that's hours later. I find it super peaceful and easy now that she's not waking up a million other times and battling me going back to sleep. I totally had your same fear about waking up again and doing it all over. I don't know if I just got lucky, or it was sleep training, or a combo, but once she fell asleep on her own at the beginning of the night the first night of our training, i think it only took 2 night wakings that first night for her to get it and go back to sleep. I think the first time she re woke it was 25 minutes of crying, then just a few minutes the second time. Now she rarely ever wakes up (besides her one, maybe two times she to eat), and when she does, just lets out a couple cries or moans then flips sides and goes right back to sleep. Hopefully I'm making sense here.
Thanks for the reply! We had a string of good nights and I was actually enjoying MOTN feedings (not as much as I would enjoy 8 hrs of straight sleep, but ya know.. it's all relative these days, haha). I have never really loved breastfeeding due to some difficulties early on, but when he was sleeping well it was really peaceful like you said and I actually felt it was a bonding experience for once. I would love to get back to that! Right now DH and I split wake up duty so I do get some sleep but he is going out of town a few times for work in August, so I think we may need to start training soon so I can survive on my own
Last night was amazing! She fell asleep about 8:30 and when I left for work at 5:30 she was still asleep. Not a peep! We didn't go full cry it out, we let her cry for a few minutes then come get her, soothe her, and put her back down. It took a few tries and she would scream even harder when we first started putting her back down, but now she may fuss or whimper but puts herself right to sleep most times. I haven't done the middle of the night feeding for a week. It's very nice having to get up so early without waking up so much. She still has the pacifier and may wake up for that in the early hours but it's not often.
And I feel like she has been in a very good mood since we started. She's always been fairly good, but I've been surprised at how much more she laughs and takes to new people. She's 5 months and 3 weeks so it may just be an age thing, but I think all of our moods are improved! My husband and I get some time together at night instead of going to bed with baby and we get our bed back. I miss the cuddles but I am loving the sleep and not obsessed with constantly checking on her. Well.. not as much...
@Knottie84607381 how many nights did it take? Did she cry much the first night? Planning to do CIO with checks this weekend and I'm dreading it!!
Took three nights for us. Night 4 she slept through and has been since!! First night wasnt as bad as I expected. Took an hour and a half to go to sleep, woke up once and took an hour and a half again. Got better each night. Good luck!
Starting at 3 months I stopped nursing to sleep. His naps lengthened and his nighttime feedings stretched out-- all with very little fuss. A few nights of crying for a few minutes at each (25 min was the longest, and more often it was under 10, and mostly none at all) so I was feeling good.
Until we went on vacation once in June and once last week. 3-hour time changes both directions, new surroundings, etc, made naps short so we had a tired baby that was having a much harder time falling asleep. When you're in someone's house or sharing space with people it is so much harder to let them cry! And he was crying longer than usual too, so after an hour I would go to him and nurse him. Eventually I skipped the torturous hour and just nursed him to sleep for naps and nighttime. LO was better rested as a result.
But now we're home and I wanted to get back to where we were before all of the travel-- with him putting himself to sleep. So I decided last night that I would just have to let him cry longer than an hour. Basically, for as long as it took. He cried for TWO HOURS and TEN MINUTES!!! Even then he didn't fall asleep-- just wiggled around in his crib for another 25 min before finally, finally falling asleep. Then for his first nap today he cried for an hour and 10 minutes before calmimg down and then sleeping. And then for his second and third naps-- no tears! I couldn't believe it. We had to convince him (and ourselves) that he could fall asleep on his own. I'm sure it's not quite over yet, but I'm already feeling like those terrible two hours were worth it.... thank goodness.
@mestokes She cried hard the first 2 or 3 days but started tapering off more quickly the next few days. After that I noticed when picking her up, her face was not wet from tears. So it seemed to me she was realizing she wasn't in real distress and not really crying. So it was encouraging! There have been a few days I have to go back in there at 1 or 3 a.m. but several of the days and she has slept through the night!
Thanks guys! Night one was great, but he had six month shots that morning so it doesnt really count (the only time he's STTN previously was after 4 month shots). Tonight was OK early on- his first few wake ups he took about 3-8 minutes to get himself back to sleep but it has gotten progressively harder as the night goes on- anyone else have this experience? It's 2:30 am and we're going on 13 minutes which feels like an eternity but I'm trying to hang in there since I know you guys have had success! I am wondering though, that first night did your LO sleep for a long time after soothing to sleep or wake up every few hours still?
Re: CIO Questions
@mestokes, for similar reasons, I would do all naps at once. It's too confusing for baby when the "rules" for some naps are different than others. They don't understand. But if every nap has the same routine, followed by you leaving, then they learn to fall asleep on their own. My LO is actually WAY more upset about naps than bed time, but her hysterics almost always end very suddenly, within 10 minutes.
@Cricket99 my LO has always fought naps too. Thats why we had to rock her. She was getting better a few weeks before we did sleep training but I feel cio has helped tremendously for naps. I set a limit for naps that I wouldnt let her cry past (30min) and the first time I had to go in and the second I picked her up she fell asleep and I put her back in the crib. From then on she got better and better. So he may just need to cio a bit for naps too.
We moved her to the crib because she was moving around too much, and she was sooo upset the first night, even though we did our full, regular routine. After an hour and a half of DH rocking her to sleep, just to have her wake immediately, we traded off and I implemented CIO. Another hour and a half of crying and she finally fell asleep. Night 2 was much better. Night 3 was amazing.
Before CIO, I had been working on the swing. Every few days, I would lower the speed. The day after CIO, I stopped turning the swing on at all. She now sleeps in a motionless swing. Haha. Not perfect but it feels like big progress! I was going to try to move her to the crib this week but I came down with a nasty cold on Sunday night and just don't have it in me right now. So, next week...
I think the consistent sleep routines are very important, especially during transition phases. That's how they know what you expect them to do even when you throw a curveball like a new space. Our bedtime routine is diaper, brush teeth, sleep sack, 2 stories, lights out, put down, white noise on, here's lovey, "night night". Our nap routine is 1 story, lights out, put down, white noise, lovey, night night. She knows by the time I'm putting her down that it's time to sleep! Sonetimes she isn't happy about it but at least she always knows what I'm asking of her.
@cali1710 Yes Freya doesn't cry when she wakes up now too! She just rolls around, plays with her feet and coos. It's super cute.
Also, did yall notice a change in your LOs personality after sleep training? Like are they generally happier/less fussy?
He does seem happier and like he's more well rested since we started training
My LO has always been super happy no matter how tired she was so we didnt notice a huge difference but with her naps getting better now with sleep training (we did sleep training with naps at the same time) I feel shes more active during the day. She has more energy I guess.
She has been such a happy, energetic baby. Don't know if that's because of sleep training or if that's just who she is.
Thanks for listening to my novel, any help/advice is appreciated!
And I feel like she has been in a very good mood since we started. She's always been fairly good, but I've been surprised at how much more she laughs and takes to new people. She's 5 months and 3 weeks so it may just be an age thing, but I think all of our moods are improved! My husband and I get some time together at night instead of going to bed with baby and we get our bed back. I miss the cuddles but I am loving the sleep and not obsessed with constantly checking on her. Well.. not as much...
@cali1710 thank you for the information!! I hope it goes that well for us!
Until we went on vacation once in June and once last week. 3-hour time changes both directions, new surroundings, etc, made naps short so we had a tired baby that was having a much harder time falling asleep. When you're in someone's house or sharing space with people it is so much harder to let them cry! And he was crying longer than usual too, so after an hour I would go to him and nurse him. Eventually I skipped the torturous hour and just nursed him to sleep for naps and nighttime. LO was better rested as a result.
But now we're home and I wanted to get back to where we were before all of the travel-- with him putting himself to sleep. So I decided last night that I would just have to let him cry longer than an hour. Basically, for as long as it took. He cried for TWO HOURS and TEN MINUTES!!! Even then he didn't fall asleep-- just wiggled around in his crib for another 25 min before finally, finally falling asleep. Then for his first nap today he cried for an hour and 10 minutes before calmimg down and then sleeping. And then for his second and third naps-- no tears! I couldn't believe it. We had to convince him (and ourselves) that he could fall asleep on his own. I'm sure it's not quite over yet, but I'm already feeling like those terrible two hours were worth it.... thank goodness.
TL;DR: CIO is HARD but it really does work!