Agree with PP-definitely get a pump before going home or soon after! We picked up ours from insurance on the way home from the hospital and I ended up needing it first night when my milk came in with a vengeance.
Is anybody having issues with their milk coming in? Baby boy was born Friday morning and I guess I was expecting to have gushing boobies by now....not so much although the supply is increasing every day. Will be going to a breastfeeding support group tomorrow.
I third having a pump already. I dropped the ball on that one and poor Aubrey is having a tough time latching, making it super painful for me and not very productive for her. We will be running out to get a manual pump tomorrow as a back up. So far the only thing working for us is using a nipple shield since she doesn't want to open her mouth wide enough to fit the whole areola.
@austinjl it took about 5 days for my milk to come in. For me it went from zero to engorgement like overnight. Glad to hear you have a support group! I wish I would have looked into that. @Schmooie730 a nipple shield has saved us as well! Glad you found something that worked.
How is everyone doing emotionally? Anyone suffering from baby blues, anxiety or maybe something more? I was hit with a pretty bad case of the baby blues about six days in and it lasted almost a week. I cried almost nonstop a couple of those days and it was really hard for my husband to know how to support me, especially when I couldn't articulate why I was so upset. Luckily that has passed and things are good. I figured hormones would be wacky afterwards but wasn't expecting that fog of sad emotions to overtake me.
@theshannondee Glad you're coming out of it. I am still waiting for baby and mostly just lurking in this thread, but pretty sure I had pp anxiety last time with DD. She was really colicky and luckily DH has an AMAZING paternity leave. Even with him at home to help, I slept less than 4 hours a day, lying in bed trying to fall asleep, counting down until the next feeding, listening to her screams. I also absolutely hated leaving the house. I felt like we were the center of attention and it would be apparent to everyone (besides just me) that I had no clue what I was doing. I think if DH wasn't home with me, I would have had full blown depression. We've been praying for an easier going baby this time and hoping that my past experience will help me to lighten up and relax more this time, but who knows how much hormones affected me too. I'm just recently not feeling so scared to actually have another baby. For a while, it was more a nice idea but my plan was to stay pregnant indefinitely. Haha.
i definitely feel like emotions are up and down. I've cried daily- for good reasons and bad. Mostly during the day I feel super happy and excited Elijah is in the world. But then if a feeding doesn't go well, I feel like crap, especially after a previous great feeding. I also cried at the latest season of Orange is the New Black. And when I read Love You Forever to him today. I'm not usually a cryer so it's a bit strange. Not necessarily bad, but emotional. Glad you're feeling better now @theshannondee
I get super bad anxiety when I breastfeed! No idea why.. He's breastfeeding awesome.. Just everytime he eats my heart feels like it's pounding out of my chest!
Thanks to my happy pills that the psychiatrist and I arranged for me to start taking again after birth, I've been feeling pretty good. It's a huge relief because I had PPA with DS, and it was terrible.
@theshannondee I am definitely more emotional. My struggle has mostly been feeling like I'm missing so much with my toddler as I'm caring for the baby. He's so well loved and cared for, as his Nana came to be here with him full-time for the first few weeks, and I'm careful to prioritize him as much as possible, but I still am struggling with missing our one-on-one time. I keep breaking into tears over it. He's acting out some for attention, but he is pretty enthralled with his baby sister, so I'm thankful for that. Wacky hormones + lack of sleep + no quiet time make the first newborn weeks really rough. Routines and rest are ahead.
Oh man I am so fearful of the hormone roller coaster!! I thank my husband for being so amazing this far, or else I think some major dips would have already happened for me. I'm super nervous for when he has to go back to work and it's just me and her. I'm glad we have this thread to all support each other!! The first month is no joke, rough!!
For all of you that have had luck breastfeeding, is there a trick to the sore ass nipples that come with it?!? I want to die every time she needs to eat because it is painful!!!!! I've been using the nipple cream the hospital gave me and I'm sure that's helping but I'm still sore as hell the second she starts!!!!
@TiffRox81 every time I nurse my daughter, I express a tiny bit at the end of the feeding and rub it on my nipple. Everything I've been told is that breast milk is much better as a healing agent than any cream you can buy. Don't get me wrong, they still hurt like heck in the beginning, but it will get better!
@TiffRox81 it gets better! My soreness has officially gone away from Friday. How did they say her latch is? Because if she's not latching properly it will stay painful.. One of the nurses helped my so much by saying to swipe your nipple from their nose to their chin and then when their mouth is open swipe back up from your chin to your nose and put it in. Doing it while going up gets your nipple to go up and back rather then going straight can cause them not getting a good latch from it not being far enough in.
For all of you that have had luck breastfeeding, is there a trick to the sore ass nipples that come with it?!? I want to die every time she needs to eat because it is painful!!!!! I've been using the nipple cream the hospital gave me and I'm sure that's helping but I'm still sore as hell the second she starts!!!!
It unfortunately just takes time to condition them. Hang in there!! Have you seen a lactation consultant to make sure she's latching ok? That said, even with proper latch, it'll still hurt for a bit. Earth Mama Angel baby makes a great nipple cream and these shields, although for inverted nipples are great for wearing between feedings. It keeps your nipples from touching anything and giving them some air. I agree with using breast milk on them too. I always tell my FTM friends, if you can plow through the first month of nursing, you are golden. You've got this
@theshannondee dh is a teacher but goes to work next week as a summer camp director and I have a feeling that's when I'm going to start with the tears! I'm already feeling a little anxious thinking about being home alone with both kids. ds is almost 13 months and has been pretty good with the arrival of the baby but hes still just a baby himself and relies on me for everything! It's been good with my husband home but i'm nervous to be on my own and I'm feeling some meltdowns might be in my future!
I'm late to the party, but I'm here! Everett is 10 days old and we're doing alright.
Breastfeeding- I second the EMAB nipple butter (plus it's safe for babies so you don't have to worry about wiping), but I've also been rubbing some breastmilk onto my nipples and letting them dry out. Bamboobies are also the softest things ever and feel great on my poor tired nipples. His latch is good (though it still hurts when he latches on the actual feeding doesn't hurt anymore), but he's doing this thing the past few days where he latches on with my help and then pops off, smiles, bats at my nipple a bit, and then tries to re-latch. His re-latch HURTS sometimes, but I'm struggling to keep him from playing with my nipple and just keep the latch I help him with. I'm also in the 7-10 day growth spurt with cluster feeding right now, which means I'm not doing anything but nursing. Thankfully he's stretched his nighttime feeds to 3 hours, so at least I'm getting some sleep.
PP body- I've been pleasantly surprised by how good my body has been feeling. My midwife insisted I not do stairs for the first week, which meant I had a whole week to lay in bed and nurse and heal. It was kind of incredible, and I highly recommend it to everyone. Let people feed you and take care of you and you focus on healing and feeding your baby. My husband has been pretty insistent on me taking it easy, and I'm not pushing back. Birth is hard fucking work and I know I'll come out the other side more whole if I give myself a break now. Also, I kind of forgot that I would have absolutely no ab muscles on the other side of that big pregnant belly.
@elenabrent Yes!!!! I know all about the pop off and relatch. And I completely agree - it's the latching that is most painful. Once she's going, I can bear that pain. It isn't too bad.
Ok sounds like I need to work with some expression after. Sounds good! Last night was night one at home and we didn't get here until about 8pm. So we're still finding our routine I guess you can say.
I have to admit I have never been much of a newborn fan prior to her. But I must say, I'm pretty obsessed. I'm trying not to be "that" new mom on FB but we're just so in love with her it's hard to imagine anyone else couldn't be too!!! Lol
Oh! Also, he has been a side sleeper since day 1. I swaddle him arms out because he hates his arms in and put him down on his back in the co-sleeper and he rolls on his side facing me immediately. The midwife said that once they can roll you can't keep them on their backs so I should just make sure there's nothing in the co-sleeper with him. During the day he either naps on my stomach or on his back in our bed next to me. Eventually when he's on a more predictable schedule we'll put him down for naps in his room but right now I'm just letting him exist in the fourth trimester without stressing about it. My friend made me feel a lot better the other day by pointing out that at this age, nothing is habit forming.
The other thing that I've found to help with sore nipples are black tea bags. You just steep them in warm water for a few minutes and then hold them against yourself. And actually, once they get cooled off completely, they feel amazing! It's so strange how one nipple is all raw and cracked and the other is fine. This engorgement is killing me!
July BMB Siggy Challenge: Weird Hot Dog Situations
Emotions are all over the place. I cry at basically everything, but the hardest thing has been trying to get Emmalyn to eat. She was doing awesome in the hospital and ever since we got home and my milk came in, she is freaked out. We've had to supplement with formula. I just felt like I was doing something wrong and was a bad mother, and cried every time I tried to feed her. DH has been awesome about talking me down and reassuring me, and that helps a lot.
PP body.. I had a really hard time gaining weight while I was pregnant. Everything is in my belly though. Anybody know how long the flabby belly sticks around?
Engorgement is the worst. I've been using warm washcloths and massage to help before a feeding so she can latch, and the lactation consultant recommended ice after a feeding, so we will try that next time! May have to try the tea bag trick though!
I'm also in the supplementing with formula club. Elijah lost one full pound between birth and his first ped visit on Tues. By today he had gained two ounces back. I'm happy he's gaining now but it's hard not to feel like my body isn't producing what he needs. I cried on the way home. I'm ramping up the pumping and hoping my supply will increase. So far it has been each day but I didn't realize how slow of a process it would be. Hang in there @schaze I feel your sadness!
Today was a big step for me... I finally admitted that I needed some help emotionally. It has been a roller coaster the last 70 days. I have been trying to stay so strong for Henry and DH but today I just broke down. I was going to go back home for the first time in 70 days and then when we got to the hospital this morning nothing was going right and I just exploded! I am emotionally and physically exhausted. I am making myself sick worrying and stressing about Henry and being coped up inside the hospital. We were so close to going home last week but Henry recently started going backwards in his feedings, this has caused my emotions to do crazy! Crying all the time and just mad at the world and feeling guilty for so many things. I talked to a Dr. Today and will be starting some Anti-depressants/anxiety meds. I hope that will help get my emotions in check and I can be a better mom and wife.
@abpl2014 I hope you get the relief you need. I can't imagine how scary the last month+ has been and I pray you and Henry and DH can make some progress and get some peace.
@abpl2014 just being there and pushing through makes you a great mom and wife! You're so strong to recognize a need to pull in a larger support system to figure out the best and healthiest way forward for you and your family!
@abpl2014 I think you're being a great mom and wife by asking for help! In order for you to take care of others you have to take care of yourself and that's exactly what you're doing. You are so strong! Keep pushing through, mama!!! Things will get better. And remember we are here for you if you need anything or just need to vent!
Thanks for the support guys and sending good jujus to everyone with their emotional ups and downs. Especially with spouses going back to work. For those dealing with engorgement- I had great luck with the cabbage leaves. I know they can lead to a decreased supply if you overuse them but I followed LLL/KellyMom guidelines and stuck them in my bra for 20 minutes twice over a 24 hour period and the difference was amazing. I think pumping and BFing together really screwed up my newly developing supply. @abpl2014 aw I am so sad to hear about your day. I know how emotionally torn you were in the first place! I am glad your doctor is taking things seriously and helping. You are a great mama to Henry and I am in awe of your patience. Hang in there- the end is hopefully in sight!
Thank you everyone for the words of encouragement! You are all or will be soon great mamas also! Love the supportiveness of this group! That's what I needed today thanks!
To chime in on the engorgement...I hope none of you get plugged milk ducts! I don't wish that upon anyone! It really sucked! Took a week to fully get better! So I know the pain it is not fun! But stick with it!
@abpl2014 lurking but I'm really proud of you for asking for the help you need. It's not an easy thing and you are very brave. You're an amazing mom and I hope you start feeling better soon!
@abpl2014 you should be so proud for speaking up and getting help, and you are in no way a bad mother, you're a better mother for it.
We went to a check up today, and everything was perfect - Ari has gained weight back, eats well (the appointment was at the breastfeeding clinic and they had me feed him there, weighed before and after), etc. BUT his temperature was low... So we're in the NICU they told us basically, it doesn't matter what else is going on, if baby's temp is low it's an automatic admission. They took blood and urine, and we're basically hanging out until they tell us we can go. The doctor said blood came back perfect but the urine analysis will tell us if there's any infections or anything else. I had a complete and utter meltdown and snuggled him so much when I fed him last, and am gonna snuggle him so much when I feed him again... This whole motherhood thing is so crazy.
I've also used Booby Tubes to help with breastfeeding pain and engorgement. They can be used hot or cold. I'm mostly doing okay with it now, but she cluster fed all evening today, and now they are owiiieee again!
Well I spoke too soon about the nipple shields. Poor Aubrey's latch is so horrible that it literally takes three people to get her on, and even then it's not great. I broke down twice because she wasn't eating and I felt horrible for not being able to feed her. Today I finally decided to give her some formula just so she would have something in her stomach and omg was it the best choice we could have made. She has been so happy and content all day. My breast pump is on its way, but I borrowed one from a friend until mine gets here (I have all new tubing and whatnot) so I can pump and build up my supply. I know I should keep trying with breast feeding but we are both so much more calm at this moment I may just pump for her. I will talk to the dr about it at our first appointment Saturday, but that's what I'm leaning towards.
@abpl2014 so proud of you for recognizing you needed help and getting it! You are doing amazing and anyone would have the same reactions in that situation. Fingers crossed Henry's feeds get better soon for you guys!
@rakel88 hopefully it's nothing major and you get to go home soon!
@abpl2014 I can't imagine how tough it is to be in the NICU for so long! You have been doing a great job, and hopefully Henry will be coming home soon!!! I'm am glad you are getting some help for the anxiety and depression. Hugs to you.
@Schmooie730 a fed baby is a happy baby (and mom!) if you want to keep working on BFing find someone/group to support you, if you want to pump that's great and if you decide to ff all that matters is that baby is fed. Seriously do what's best for you and baby.
@rakel88 oh no! My thoughts are with you guys. What an emotional roller coaster. @Schmooie730 who knew feeding a baby could be so heart wrenching, right? Glad some formula helped! Hang in there!!
Re: Newborn/Postpartum Thread
How is everyone doing emotionally? Anyone suffering from baby blues, anxiety or maybe something more? I was hit with a pretty bad case of the baby blues about six days in and it lasted almost a week. I cried almost nonstop a couple of those days and it was really hard for my husband to know how to support me, especially when I couldn't articulate why I was so upset. Luckily that has passed and things are good. I figured hormones would be wacky afterwards but wasn't expecting that fog of sad emotions to overtake me.
Wacky hormones + lack of sleep + no quiet time make the first newborn weeks really rough. Routines and rest are ahead.
Breastfeeding- I second the EMAB nipple butter (plus it's safe for babies so you don't have to worry about wiping), but I've also been rubbing some breastmilk onto my nipples and letting them dry out. Bamboobies are also the softest things ever and feel great on my poor tired nipples. His latch is good (though it still hurts when he latches on the actual feeding doesn't hurt anymore), but he's doing this thing the past few days where he latches on with my help and then pops off, smiles, bats at my nipple a bit, and then tries to re-latch. His re-latch HURTS sometimes, but I'm struggling to keep him from playing with my nipple and just keep the latch I help him with. I'm also in the 7-10 day growth spurt with cluster feeding right now, which means I'm not doing anything but nursing. Thankfully he's stretched his nighttime feeds to 3 hours, so at least I'm getting some sleep.
PP body- I've been pleasantly surprised by how good my body has been feeling. My midwife insisted I not do stairs for the first week, which meant I had a whole week to lay in bed and nurse and heal. It was kind of incredible, and I highly recommend it to everyone. Let people feed you and take care of you and you focus on healing and feeding your baby. My husband has been pretty insistent on me taking it easy, and I'm not pushing back. Birth is hard fucking work and I know I'll come out the other side more whole if I give myself a break now. Also, I kind of forgot that I would have absolutely no ab muscles on the other side of that big pregnant belly.
Ok sounds like I need to work with some expression after. Sounds good! Last night was night one at home and we didn't get here until about 8pm. So we're still finding our routine I guess you can say.
I have to admit I have never been much of a newborn fan prior to her. But I must say, I'm pretty obsessed. I'm trying not to be "that" new mom on FB but we're just so in love with her it's hard to imagine anyone else couldn't be too!!! Lol
PP body.. I had a really hard time gaining weight while I was pregnant. Everything is in my belly though. Anybody know how long the flabby belly sticks around?
Engorgement is the worst. I've been using warm washcloths and massage to help before a feeding so she can latch, and the lactation consultant recommended ice after a feeding, so we will try that next time! May have to try the tea bag trick though!
July16 JULY siggy challenge
For those dealing with engorgement- I had great luck with the cabbage leaves. I know they can lead to a decreased supply if you overuse them but I followed LLL/KellyMom guidelines and stuck them in my bra for 20 minutes twice over a 24 hour period and the difference was amazing. I think pumping and BFing together really screwed up my newly developing supply.
@abpl2014 aw I am so sad to hear about your day. I know how emotionally torn you were in the first place! I am glad your doctor is taking things seriously and helping. You are a great mama to Henry and I am in awe of your patience. Hang in there- the end is hopefully in sight!
To chime in on the engorgement...I hope none of you get plugged milk ducts! I don't wish that upon anyone! It really sucked! Took a week to fully get better! So I know the pain it is not fun! But stick with it!
We went to a check up today, and everything was perfect - Ari has gained weight back, eats well (the appointment was at the breastfeeding clinic and they had me feed him there, weighed before and after), etc. BUT his temperature was low... So we're in the NICU
I had a complete and utter meltdown and snuggled him so much when I fed him last, and am gonna snuggle him so much when I feed him again... This whole motherhood thing is so crazy.
they are owiiieee again!
@abpl2014 so proud of you for recognizing you needed help and getting it! You are doing amazing and anyone would have the same reactions in that situation. Fingers crossed Henry's feeds get better soon for you guys!
@rakel88 hopefully it's nothing major and you get to go home soon!
@Schmooie730 who knew feeding a baby could be so heart wrenching, right? Glad some formula helped! Hang in there!!