May 2016 Moms

Comments from Strangers Thread

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Re: Comments from Strangers Thread

  • I can't tell you how many coworkers have asked me if I am coming back next school year. The truth is, I am not, however, I don't want that spreading around. But it is interesting that people do assume that with 2 kiddos under 3 I wouldn't need some kind of income. One para actually got really emotional when she asked me today and I think she has seen the writing on the wall for some time now so she was going on and on about how much she will miss me...while I am "out on maternity leave", but obviously meaning next year as well.

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  • I can't tell you how many coworkers have asked me if I am coming back next school year. The truth is, I am not, however, I don't want that spreading around. But it is interesting that people do assume that with 2 kiddos under 3 I wouldn't need some kind of income. One para actually got really emotional when she asked me today and I think she has seen the writing on the wall for some time now so she was going on and on about how much she will miss me...while I am "out on maternity leave", but obviously meaning next year as well.
    My coworkers, who also happen to be my aunts since I work for my family's business, keep asking me if I'm coming back, too. They know me, they know my husband (he works here too), and they know how much we make... How do they think we'd afford life if I didn't come back?! 

    In other news, my one aunt/coworker keeps asking me when I think I'll start getting internal exams. She's asks me weekly. Why do you need to know this?! 
  • Jparke2 said:
    I can't tell you how many coworkers have asked me if I am coming back next school year. The truth is, I am not, however, I don't want that spreading around. But it is interesting that people do assume that with 2 kiddos under 3 I wouldn't need some kind of income. One para actually got really emotional when she asked me today and I think she has seen the writing on the wall for some time now so she was going on and on about how much she will miss me...while I am "out on maternity leave", but obviously meaning next year as well.
    My coworkers, who also happen to be my aunts since I work for my family's business, keep asking me if I'm coming back, too. They know me, they know my husband (he works here too), and they know how much we make... How do they think we'd afford life if I didn't come back?! 

    In other news, my one aunt/coworker keeps asking me when I think I'll start getting internal exams. She's asks me weekly. Why do you need to know this?! 
    This reminds me of last pregnancy when we had a new librarian who had just started in the spring-- I had *just* met her and she asked me if I had lost my mucus plug or had my bloody show yet. I think some people get so excited about the ins and outs of pregnancy that they completely forget they are asking these things to a real life person and not a TV character.
  • A drama queen co-worker who had been on LTD came back to my 33-wk belly. She has kissed it twice now. I was frozen both times, like Molly Ringwald in Sixteen Candles when grandma goes in for the boobies. I'm going to have to stay seated at my desk around her from now on...
  • jenbkc said:
    I was standing in the checkout line at a store today and the woman in front of me looked at my belly and then said "Well you must be eating a lot."

    Um, it's not food. It's a baby you crazy old bat.
    Wow that's gotta be the rudest thing you could ever say to someone. I hope it was sarcasm because who would actually say that to another person? 
  • The PE teacher at my school asked me if I was sure I was coming back in September. When I said yes she said "well you don't KNOW!" So I told her "well I know my kid will need clothes and shoes..."

    one of of the bus drivers (we take the bus every day this week for swim lessons) told me in a panic she had no plan for if I went into labor on the bus. I'm 35 weeks and I go on leave in three days. I'll probably be okay.

    then that same bus driver AND my principal said "looks like he's dropped!". I mean, yeah, he's starting to drop (lightning crotch!!) but let's not spend a lot of time looking at my bump.

    then the same bus driver AND a parent asked if I was planning to go natural (yes...)

    then the custodian said I was looking a little chubby.
    it was a weird day.


  • Not a stranger, but my own father. He commented on my last bump pic, "Ma'am, please step away from the refrigerator and put your hands over your lips!" 

    ...

    How my mother stayed married to that man for 12 years is just beyond me. 
    My dad has been trying hard to lose weight the last 6 months and has lost about 50lbs...he now weighs 185lbs. He was so proud of himself when he was telling me yesterday (and I'm proud too)....then I told him I currently
    weigh 200lbs and feel like an elephant (I have barely put on 30lbs and am tall so it's not that noticeable). And he relies LMAO...my response was...I literally wish I could laugh my ass off. You know it's a bad day when you weigh more than your dad! 
  • Not a stranger, but my own father. He commented on my last bump pic, "Ma'am, please step away from the refrigerator and put your hands over your lips!" 

    ...

    How my mother stayed married to that man for 12 years is just beyond me. 
    My dad has been trying hard to lose weight the last 6 months and has lost about 50lbs...he now weighs 185lbs. He was so proud of himself when he was telling me yesterday (and I'm proud too)....then I told him I currently
    weigh 200lbs and feel like an elephant (I have barely put on 30lbs and am tall so it's not that noticeable). And he relies LMAO...my response was...I literally wish I could laugh my ass off. You know it's a bad day when you weigh more than your dad! 
    Good for your dad! The good news is that we will lose a bunch of our weight quickly between L&D and nursing ;) 
  • Well, I just got a good one. It was from my Dad, though, not a stranger.

    I went out to dinner with my parents tonight, and while we were waiting for our food to arrive, my dad goes "Well, when you are done breastfeeding and all that, if you want I'll pay for you to get a prescription for diet pills." My parents both go to a doctor who prescribes diet pills/appetite suppressants and even I went for a short time in college. I ended up stopping because I just felt horrible and weird and not myself the whole time. The pills definitely worked and I lost weight, but I ended up feeling like I was probably doing something harmful to my body since I had a lot more heart palpitations and dizzy spells and all that kind of stuff while taking the meds. It actually worries me sometimes that my parents still regularly go there. Anyway, I politely declined and then tried not to feel bad about myself. I know my dad meant it in a generous, gift-giving way more than he meant it in a fat shaming way, but still... gee Dad, thanks a lot.... 
  • Ugh, diet pills are so bad for you.

    I'm all for shedding excess weight, but there's a line between doing it because it's good for your health and doing it at the cost of your health, and diet pills are, in 99.99% of cases, way across that line.

    You were right to quit them and I'm sorry your parents tried to push them on you again.
  • Merciel said:
    Ugh, diet pills are so bad for you.

    I'm all for shedding excess weight, but there's a line between doing it because it's good for your health and doing it at the cost of your health, and diet pills are, in 99.99% of cases, way across that line.

    You were right to quit them and I'm sorry your parents tried to push them on you again.
    Yeah, I regret taking them. But it feels like it's ok when there is doctor there giving it to you. I ended up feeling like I really didn't trust the doctors there and like I said, it worries me that my parents still take them! Luckily I don't feel "pushed" or anything by my parents, my mom is actually one of my favorite people to be a glutton with haha. I think my dad just wasn't thinking about what he was saying.
  • swflJD said:
    So, DH and I met some friends at this wine bar (super fun for me!) after work last night for a friend's birthday.  I have known the guest of honor for several years, and I have always heard her talk about her best friend from back home, but I had never met that friend of hers until last night.  As soon as she introduced us, her friend immediately started rubbing my stomach as she says, "You're so round!"  I calmly said, "Please don't touch me," to which she replied, "But it's so cute!" and kept rubbing!  WTF!?  I quickly excused myself to the restroom and stayed in there for a while to cool off.  If it hadn't been my friend's birthday, I would have punched this woman, but I didn't want to upset my friend and ruin her birthday.  We only stayed for about half an hour after that because I was still fuming.  I ended up playing the pregnancy card and telling my friend that I was tired, so we were going home.  Considering my friend's expression when she saw it happen, I'm sure she really knew why we left.  She texted me today to apologize about her friend.  I still can't believe it happened.  It makes my blood pressure spike just recounting it here.  
    Wait, you asked her to stop and she kept going because "it is so cute"? I need to commend you on your incredible self-control. It takes a lot to keep from hauling off and decking someone with such little regard for personal space and common decency! Seriously, WHY do people think a pregnant woman's body is fair game? Just because it is pretty awesome that we are literally carrying life, that gives NO ONE the right to touch us! I can't get over the number of responses to this thread. It is just mind-boggling!

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  • I must look super pregnant today because I've gotten more comments than ever.

    On the subway this morning I stood up just as the train was pulling into my stop and stumbled a bit as they hit the breaks. Random man says, "Be careful, you don't want to deliver here!" (WTF)

    It's only 2 o'clock and 5 random people that work in my building have commented that I must be close and two said I look like I'm about to pop.
  • swflJD said:
    So, DH and I met some friends at this wine bar (super fun for me!) after work last night for a friend's birthday.  I have known the guest of honor for several years, and I have always heard her talk about her best friend from back home, but I had never met that friend of hers until last night.  As soon as she introduced us, her friend immediately started rubbing my stomach as she says, "You're so round!"  I calmly said, "Please don't touch me," to which she replied, "But it's so cute!" and kept rubbing!  WTF!?  I quickly excused myself to the restroom and stayed in there for a while to cool off.  If it hadn't been my friend's birthday, I would have punched this woman, but I didn't want to upset my friend and ruin her birthday.  We only stayed for about half an hour after that because I was still fuming.  I ended up playing the pregnancy card and telling my friend that I was tired, so we were going home.  Considering my friend's expression when she saw it happen, I'm sure she really knew why we left.  She texted me today to apologize about her friend.  I still can't believe it happened.  It makes my blood pressure spike just recounting it here.  
    Wait, you asked her to stop and she kept going because "it is so cute"? I need to commend you on your incredible self-control. It takes a lot to keep from hauling off and decking someone with such little regard for personal space and common decency! Seriously, WHY do people think a pregnant woman's body is fair game? Just because it is pretty awesome that we are literally carrying life, that gives NO ONE the right to touch us! I can't get over the number of responses to this thread. It is just mind-boggling!
    Yep!  I normally have a very short fuse, so I, too, was surprised by how much self-control I exhibited!  I think I was just in shock!  And I could tell by her expression that my poor friend was horrified, and I didn't want to cause a big scene and ruin her birthday.  It was definitely the worst experience I've had with boundaries during this pregnancy so far!      
  •  A client came in for her appointment yesterday, looked at me and said, "Ahh, I can tell you're near the end now - your face is getting puffy." :| 


    Image result for green dog

    Me: 30 DH: 32
    BFP #1: 9/12/2015
    DD: 6/1/2016
    BFP #2: 1/16/2018 MC 2/2/2018

  • Wait, you asked her to stop and she kept going because "it is so cute"? I need to commend you on your incredible self-control. It takes a lot to keep from hauling off and decking someone with such little regard for personal space and common decency! Seriously, WHY do people think a pregnant woman's body is fair game? Just because it is pretty awesome that we are literally carrying life, that gives NO ONE the right to touch us! I can't get over the number of responses to this thread. It is just mind-boggling!
    Yep!  I normally have a very short fuse, so I, too, was surprised by how much self-control I exhibited!  I think I was just in shock!  And I could tell by her expression that my poor friend was horrified, and I didn't want to cause a big scene and ruin her birthday.  It was definitely the worst experience I've had with boundaries during this pregnancy so far!      
    Just want to add that I too am amazed by your self-restraint.  I'd like to think I could have had your initial reaction of "please don't touch me" but once she kept at it there would have been blood.
  • Umm, thanks @spylon and @southerngirlgetsfit for jinxing me! After a wonderful conversation this morning with a parent about how I am glowing and look gorgeous, I just had not one, but two coworkers make comments about how tomorrow is my last day of work. I explained that April 15th is my last day and I have another week, but they just looked at each other and smiled condescendingly, both commenting how "You can tell in your face. You have that look about you that you are going to drop that baby out any second!" First, I look damn fine. Second, there will be no "dropping this baby out" until we are both good and ready! Grrrrrrr  :s

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  • My sister told me my bump "looks fake" too.

    I thought it was nice of her (and more than a little generous, since my ankles and butt have definitely both expanded over the past few weeks, but... hey, at this point, I'll take it). I just wish it felt fake.
  • Yes to all who said people think your belly is fake looking (too lazy to quote). I have been getting that a lot, especially since she hasn't dropped back down yet (fine by me!) so I am still carrying super high and really far out. I caught a weird angle in a window and stood there staring at my comically large belly and I could totally see where those comments came from. From the side, I look like I am smuggling a very large watermelon under my shirt with two bizarrely round honeydews balanced on top. My boobs went from droopy sadness to super round and kind of hard in a manner of one week. MH has most definitely noticed and I feel like a really weird porn star in some of my lower cut shirts. At this point, I just throw up my hands and say that I have lost all control over how I look and that what you see is what you get. There is no hiding anything anymore so I am fully prepared for all sorts of comments and looks.

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  • Oh i just remembered this. I was at a restaurant ordering and the guy who took my order commented on my obvious pregnancy.  He then proceeded to tell me how he wishes he could experience it.  Uh...no.  
  • Got my first "are you sure it's not twins" today from one of the cafeteria ladies in my school.  Yes, I'm very, very sure.  I also got a lot of "any day now" comments from people the last couple days--nope, more like 7 weeks, thank you very much.

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  • Oh i just remembered this. I was at a restaurant ordering and the guy who took my order commented on my obvious pregnancy.  He then proceeded to tell me how he wishes he could experience it.  Uh...no.  
    What a creeper!  I'm pretty sure if he knew what the experience actually entailed, he would have no interest in experiencing it!
  • So, this wasn't a stranger, rather someone at church told me I was looking big and should go for a run... I've only gained a total of 4 pounds this pregnancy! And it's quite rude to say that even as a joke!

    then I was picking out fabric to make curtains for the nursery and the lady that was cutting my fabric asked if I was sure it was just one. I said yes they checked and she was like well you never know but I guess I was that big with my daughter... I must look giant to people but at work if I have my sweater or jacket on no one can tel I'm pregnant! I don't get it and I wanted to slap her silly!! 
  • Crazy lady on the street while walking DS1 and the dog "you're having a girl." Um no, but good guess. 
  • One of my students (a sophomore) told me today I look like I'm going to burst open... I told her it was the nicest thing anyone had told me all day.  She told me it was a compliment... Good thing I have a sense of humor! Lol 
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