My FFFC is that yesterday I actually told my husband I wish I could fast forward through my maternity leave. I don't actually mean that. Yesterday was a stressful day and had me so fearful of taking off. Shit hits the fan when I'm gone for a day. It sucks when you play a part in running the company and want to just ignore work for a couple months. Guess that's the working mom struggle. I did it with DD#1 and I'll manage this time around. I almost broke down when the thought crossed my mind.
It is so weird when people ask when my last day of work is and then my EDD and the reactions are intense. This little lady is getting a slightly early eviction notice at 38wks so she will be delivered via CS on 4/20. The last day of school before April break is 4/15. So, I figured I would work until 4/15, then gracefully glide off into the sunset. But apparently, everyone is shocked that I will be working so close to the date. I mean, it's not like I am going to go into labor at work (oh, God, please I hope not!). I will work until the Friday, then have the weekend and a few days to settle and breathe until I go in for the scheduled procedure on Wednesday. Seems fine to me, but coworkers, family, and friends all think I am nuts. Am I being naive here? I feel like it will work, but maybe not...?
*Lurking from April* @laurenmdrn16, I don't feel like your plan is weird at all. My coworker who had a repeat c/s in August worked until the day before (Thursday, c/s on Friday), and hers was scheduled for 39 weeks. It also seems odd that anyone else would care quite so much, but then pregnancy does seem to bring strong opinions crawling out of the woodwork.
I went to the Amish Market that isn't far from our apartment this morning and got half a dozen donuts. Obviously I don't intend to eat them all and certainly not at once, but I had a smores donut for breakfast. I regret nothing.
It was AMAZING. Fresh made amish donuts are soooooo much superior to any other donut I've ever had.
Ok I'm not a stalker but I remember you saying you live in MD. Im pretty sure i know exactly what place you are talking about and they have THE BEST donuts of all times. And the best Apple fritter bites. Jealous.
Edited to say that I hope you are the MD person and I'm not just making the whole thing up in my head!
My confessions are coming off more like rants today but..... *Kanye shrug*
I no longer believe in "having/ doing it all." Before I was pregnant I would've talked about powering through and working until you went into labor. Why? Because women can do it all. They can be pregnant, work, climb the ladder, achieve, win, conquer the world. But now as I suffer through the third trimester I say, "F that!" I can't do it all. Sometimes I need help. And that's ok! I don't want to work until my water breaks. I want to take long naps in the afternoon and sleep in. Not because I'm lazy but because I'm growing a f-ing human being. A human being that our world, society, economy depends on. We need women to have babies for our world to continue functioning and therefore, IMO, we (society) need to support women having babies. It just sucks because I don't have the time off to make this happen. I feel like the world is forcing me to try and have/ do it all.... and I confess that I just can't.
I'm here too. I planned to work until the Friday before my due date (which is a Sunday). Just this past week I was like screw it, I'm leaving a week early. My job is super stressful. I want to be able to clear my head before the baby comes. It's not going to be looked on favorably at work, that's for sure. I work with mostly men whose child-rearing years are very much behind them. I can't even really care about that anymore, honestly. Like you said, I'm growing a human being.
I'm feeling really torn about when to start my maternity leave. I'm extremely lucky to have the flexibility at work to decide when the time comes but I just don't know what will be best. I'm worried that if I stop working before I go into labor I will feel like a ticking time bomb watching/waiting for labor to start which would be miserable. But I'm pretty much miserable now and the idea of working until the bitter end sounds really hard.
It is so weird when people ask when my last day of work is and then my EDD and the reactions are intense. This little lady is getting a slightly early eviction notice at 38wks so she will be delivered via CS on 4/20. The last day of school before April break is 4/15. So, I figured I would work until 4/15, then gracefully glide off into the sunset. But apparently, everyone is shocked that I will be working so close to the date. I mean, it's not like I am going to go into labor at work (oh, God, please I hope not!). I will work until the Friday, then have the weekend and a few days to settle and breathe until I go in for the scheduled procedure on Wednesday. Seems fine to me, but coworkers, family, and friends all think I am nuts. Am I being naive here? I feel like it will work, but maybe not...?
@laurenmdrn16Seems reasonable to me. With DD I worked up until my induction date. I was so terrified of having a baby I thought it would be a good idea to keep my mind occupied, and I didn't really regret it. If I was going back to work this time I'd take a couple of days to have some alone time with DD, but that's about it.
I'm annoyed with my morning counterpart at the school library. Way back in the beginning of January, I noticed that shelving books was becoming much more difficult (and if I overextend myself, actually painful) for me - mostly all the up and down between high and low shelves. I mentioned this to my supervisor (the LMC specialist) and my coworker.
My coworker was, at the time, absolutely fine with trying to shelve more on the bottom shelves and leave higher up books for me. She's never brought up a change of heart about it to me, but she's pretty much never, ever focused on shelving the lower shelf books - she leaves a mixed bag just like always.
Then yesterday I got in, and pretty much nothing was shelved. We'd even had a volunteer in that morning who does some shelving for us, but my coworker had her do something that yeah, it's a bonus that the volunteer did it, but it was way way down the priority list from getting shelving done. Coworker herself spent most of the time processing magazines - again waaay down the priority list.
Now, I am absolutely fine with being left some shelving. I'm not looking to get out of shelving. If she wanted to leave me the lower shelf stuff, that would be fine too! I could just grab a kikstep and scoot my way along. But she left me pretty much everything, when she knows that I am having trouble due to the pregnancy. I got as much done as I could, but between kids always bringing books with them when their class comes in because they forgot to put them in their return cart that morning, and kids who come in on their own and returning and checking out new books, I had to leave some for the next day. It happens, especially because 3 days a week I have to leave right away to get to my other job and have enough time for dinner.
Then today, I get in, and she seriously asked me why so much shelving was left when she came in. It was very hard not to freak out at her.
I ate half a bagel and oatmeal this morning. And I just had a slice of pizza and pasta. Not sure why I'm pairing carbs, but obviously I'm craving them hardcore right now.
Today at the grocery store I forgot to pick up yogurt but somehow managed to come home with two enormous pieces of sheet cake (one of which I immediately fobbed off on my husband to spread the guilt around a little).
I'm annoyed with my morning counterpart at the school library. Way back in the beginning of January, I noticed that shelving books was becoming much more difficult (and if I overextend myself, actually painful) for me - mostly all the up and down between high and low shelves. I mentioned this to my supervisor (the LMC specialist) and my coworker.
My coworker was, at the time, absolutely fine with trying to shelve more on the bottom shelves and leave higher up books for me. She's never brought up a change of heart about it to me, but she's pretty much never, ever focused on shelving the lower shelf books - she leaves a mixed bag just like always.
Then yesterday I got in, and pretty much nothing was shelved. We'd even had a volunteer in that morning who does some shelving for us, but my coworker had her do something that yeah, it's a bonus that the volunteer did it, but it was way way down the priority list from getting shelving done. Coworker herself spent most of the time processing magazines - again waaay down the priority list.
Now, I am absolutely fine with being left some shelving. I'm not looking to get out of shelving. If she wanted to leave me the lower shelf stuff, that would be fine too! I could just grab a kikstep and scoot my way along. But she left me pretty much everything, when she knows that I am having trouble due to the pregnancy. I got as much done as I could, but between kids always bringing books with them when their class comes in because they forgot to put them in their return cart that morning, and kids who come in on their own and returning and checking out new books, I had to leave some for the next day. It happens, especially because 3 days a week I have to leave right away to get to my other job and have enough time for dinner.
Then today, I get in, and she seriously asked me why so much shelving was left when she came in. It was very hard not to freak out at her.
I have been dealing with something very similar, only instead of shelving books it is filing customer documents. A coworker and I split the filing duties, and months ago I told her I could no longer file the bottom drawers. She was fine with it, but complains every chance she can get. She'll whine about how she can't breathe/her knees hurt/her back hurts/etc, and guilt me about it. She'll get on my case about me needing to keep up with the other filing, boss me around, and act like a total child about it. Then the next day she'll act like it never happened and tell me to take my time or let her do it all so I don't tire myself out. All of this is especially frustrating because for the 16 years that she worked there before I started last summer, SHE DID THE FILING BY HERSELF. So really, I don't want to hear any complaints, because I'm helping her regardless. Anyway, I feel your pain. In my case, I think its just that my coworker is an incredibly insecure and childish woman and she likes to play the victim. When she sees me getting "special treatment" or whatever for being pregnant, she feels the need to one-up me by having a headache or being exhausted or having sore muscles. Which is odd, because she is actually a very kind-hearted woman. I just don't get people!
In my insomniac mind rewind, I remembered another good one. I was eating some snacks around lunchtime and heard a call on the walkie for "Guidance to Room 112". Response came that the guidance counselor was out of the building. So the caller said "Ok, nurse to Room 112". I dusted off the crumbs and grabbed my go-bag while responding "Nurse on the way" and shuffling out of my office. My principal met me halfway and said "If this is for a restraint or any other student violence (it had been that kind of week), I don't want you anywhere near this situation." I nodded and we got to the room. The teacher met us at the door and said in a hushed voice "Oh, thank goodness! We have a situation. Quinn won't eat his lunch. He just refuses. What should we do?"
My principal and I just blinked at each other and she walked away mumbling about a million things she has to do. So I asked if the kid is throwing up or sick and the teacher said "Well no, but he is going to be hungry all day if he doesn't eat!" So I called for the kid to come over and bring his lunchbox. I asked if his belly was hurting or if he felt sick and he said "No, I just feel tired" So I asked him to open his lunchbox and said "Oh that apple will give you lots of energy. And that clementine will make you a superhero with vitamin c to fight off germs. And what kind of sandwich is that?" He answered peanut butter and nutella so I said "Well, if you aren't going to eat it, I'll take it." His teacher looked horrified and the kid's eyes widened. He said "But Mommy cut off the crust for me and everything!" I said "So you are going to eat it?" He nodded and I shrugged saying "Guess I'll just have to make my own when I get home." I sent him back to his seat where he proceeded to snarf down his sandwich. I couldn't even look at the teacher and just waddled down the hall.
When I passed my principal's door, she asked how the "emergency" turned out and I just answered "I threatened to take the kid's sandwich so he is eating now", continued to my office, and closed the door for an early lunch. These are the things they don't teach you in four years of nursing school and countless continuing ed courses.
4 WEEKS????? You are kidding, right?? How does any company think a woman is physically or mentally ready to come back after 4 weeks. Wow, I am sorry to hear that. I am glad to hear you were able to extend it.
And yes, more of a vent. I do agree that having interaction with other kids is vital for growth as well. I just wish we got a standard 6 months (give or take) to have that time with baby. I cried last night during Rattled when the boring NYC lady dropped her kid off at daycare. How will I be able to do that? It all just sucks.
Seriously! I think the official policy says something like "four weeks unpaid, and vacation time may NOT be added to that." Like, absolutely don't take more than a month. When I told my boss I was pregnant I said, "I'm taking two months." Luckily he's a super reasonable guy, I have no idea how that's the policy they landed on... my husband thinks it's because everyone else in the office is a guy and they have to make it fair, and don't want to let the guys take off several months. Which is also dumb, but whatever. The whole US mat/pat leave is terrible. I would like my 6 months too, please!
...And what kind of sandwich is that?" He answered peanut butter and nutella so I said "Well, if you aren't going to eat it, I'll take it." His teacher looked horrified and the kid's eyes widened. He said "But Mommy cut off the crust for me and everything!" I said "So you are going to eat it?" He nodded and I shrugged saying "Guess I'll just have to make my own when I get home." I sent him back to his seat where he proceeded to snarf down his sandwich. I couldn't even look at the teacher and just waddled down the hall...
In my insomniac mind rewind, I remembered another good one. I was eating some snacks around lunchtime and heard a call on the walkie for "Guidance to Room 112". Response came that the guidance counselor was out of the building. So the caller said "Ok, nurse to Room 112". I dusted off the crumbs and grabbed my go-bag while responding "Nurse on the way" and shuffling out of my office. My principal met me halfway and said "If this is for a restraint or any other student violence (it had been that kind of week), I don't want you anywhere near this situation." I nodded and we got to the room. The teacher met us at the door and said in a hushed voice "Oh, thank goodness! We have a situation. Quinn won't eat his lunch. He just refuses. What should we do?"
My principal and I just blinked at each other and she walked away mumbling about a million things she has to do. So I asked if the kid is throwing up or sick and the teacher said "Well no, but he is going to be hungry all day if he doesn't eat!" So I called for the kid to come over and bring his lunchbox. I asked if his belly was hurting or if he felt sick and he said "No, I just feel tired" So I asked him to open his lunchbox and said "Oh that apple will give you lots of energy. And that clementine will make you a superhero with vitamin c to fight off germs. And what kind of sandwich is that?" He answered peanut butter and nutella so I said "Well, if you aren't going to eat it, I'll take it." His teacher looked horrified and the kid's eyes widened. He said "But Mommy cut off the crust for me and everything!" I said "So you are going to eat it?" He nodded and I shrugged saying "Guess I'll just have to make my own when I get home." I sent him back to his seat where he proceeded to snarf down his sandwich. I couldn't even look at the teacher and just waddled down the hall.
When I passed my principal's door, she asked how the "emergency" turned out and I just answered "I threatened to take the kid's sandwich so he is eating now", continued to my office, and closed the door for an early lunch. These are the things they don't teach you in four years of nursing school and countless continuing ed courses.
eHug!!!! I'm the counselor who gets these calls daily at my school. Sometimes I get frustrated thinking "I can't believe I went to school for 6 years to handle this."
Re: FFFC 3/4/16
@laurenmdrn16, I don't feel like your plan is weird at all. My coworker who had a repeat c/s in August worked until the day before (Thursday, c/s on Friday), and hers was scheduled for 39 weeks. It also seems odd that anyone else would care quite so much, but then pregnancy does seem to bring strong opinions crawling out of the woodwork.
Me: 31
DH: 29, SA - Great
Married: June 12,2011
TTC #1: 1/2014
Diagnosis: Hypothalamic Amenorrhea
Treatment: Clomid: 50mg, 100mg, 150mg - not successful and not monitored
Menopur 75ml (upped to 112.5ml), Ovidrel, & IUI IUI #1 8/31/2015
9/15/2015: BFP HCG - 400, 9/17/2015: HCG - 827, 9/21/2015 - HCG 3,327!I'm annoyed with my morning counterpart at the school library. Way back in the beginning of January, I noticed that shelving books was becoming much more difficult (and if I overextend myself, actually painful) for me - mostly all the up and down between high and low shelves. I mentioned this to my supervisor (the LMC specialist) and my coworker.
My coworker was, at the time, absolutely fine with trying to shelve more on the bottom shelves and leave higher up books for me. She's never brought up a change of heart about it to me, but she's pretty much never, ever focused on shelving the lower shelf books - she leaves a mixed bag just like always.
Then yesterday I got in, and pretty much nothing was shelved. We'd even had a volunteer in that morning who does some shelving for us, but my coworker had her do something that yeah, it's a bonus that the volunteer did it, but it was way way down the priority list from getting shelving done. Coworker herself spent most of the time processing magazines - again waaay down the priority list.
Now, I am absolutely fine with being left some shelving. I'm not looking to get out of shelving. If she wanted to leave me the lower shelf stuff, that would be fine too! I could just grab a kikstep and scoot my way along. But she left me pretty much everything, when she knows that I am having trouble due to the pregnancy. I got as much done as I could, but between kids always bringing books with them when their class comes in because they forgot to put them in their return cart that morning, and kids who come in on their own and returning and checking out new books, I had to leave some for the next day. It happens, especially because 3 days a week I have to leave right away to get to my other job and have enough time for dinner.
Then today, I get in, and she seriously asked me why so much shelving was left when she came in. It was very hard not to freak out at her.
My principal and I just blinked at each other and she walked away mumbling about a million things she has to do. So I asked if the kid is throwing up or sick and the teacher said "Well no, but he is going to be hungry all day if he doesn't eat!" So I called for the kid to come over and bring his lunchbox. I asked if his belly was hurting or if he felt sick and he said "No, I just feel tired" So I asked him to open his lunchbox and said "Oh that apple will give you lots of energy. And that clementine will make you a superhero with vitamin c to fight off germs. And what kind of sandwich is that?" He answered peanut butter and nutella so I said "Well, if you aren't going to eat it, I'll take it." His teacher looked horrified and the kid's eyes widened. He said "But Mommy cut off the crust for me and everything!" I said "So you are going to eat it?" He nodded and I shrugged saying "Guess I'll just have to make my own when I get home." I sent him back to his seat where he proceeded to snarf down his sandwich. I couldn't even look at the teacher and just waddled down the hall.
When I passed my principal's door, she asked how the "emergency" turned out and I just answered "I threatened to take the kid's sandwich so he is eating now", continued to my office, and closed the door for an early lunch. These are the things they don't teach you in four years of nursing school and countless continuing ed courses.
mmmmm.... peanut butter and nutella sandwich...
DD: 05/14/16