So Much Stress Lately

Knottie1450304223 · February 2016

I have been under a lot of stress at work but especially with my fiance. It seems for the past week or so all we do is fight. We try to have a normal conversation over text and it always turns into a huge fight where supposedly I am misunderstanding him. He tells me there's no emotion in a text and I beg to differ. Today I told him I had to run something over to a girlfriend's that I borrowed and he flipped in his text asking me who she was, why I haven't mentioned her, and why can't she come get it with. It was a snappy tone in my opinion. I asked him politely to quit snapping at me at work and he told me that he doesn't snap and he's done talking to me. Wtf? Do I have the problem of misreading texts because I'm pregnant and emotional or is he the one not realizing how he's coming across in a text?

kyraaD · February 2016

uhm.. i dont think pregnancy affects your ability to read texts. if it sounds snappy to you, then he's probably being a little snappy. maybe you guys should stick to phone calls instead of text if it's causing this much stress on your relationship.

ecwk · February 2016

This really is a conversation you should have face to face with him. No one here will have any idea what his intentions were, what his tone was, whether you are misinterpreting it etc.
Good luck.

FiancB · February 2016

While my emotions do get a bit more labile with progesterone, whether from PMS or pregnancy, it doesn't make me totally imagine issues that don't exist. It just makes me less tolerant of them. Sounds to me like he's being a little bitch and you need to talk to him.

Did he flip because he thinks your cheating? If so, that's a bit red flag IMO, as is putting the idea into your head that you're only upset because you're pregnant. Familiarize yourself with the terms projecting and gaslighting.

fourtsixand2 · February 2016

I cannot stress enough how frustrating text conversations are. It is sometimes impossible to read into someone's emotions over text. I've learned through trial and error that there are just some conversations you have to have in person, or at least over a phone call.

_darth · February 2016

Being snappy ("I don't snap. I'm done talking to you" is really snappy) and then blaming it all on your interpretation is a form of gaslighting. He is making you question your perception of reality. If he cannot be bothered to learn to effectively communicate over text, he should not communicate over text, especially when it comes to serious things. Sit him down to outline more effective means of communication.

wildtot · February 2016

Yeah don't text. Stick to phone calls but sounds like you guys really need to sit down face to face. Meanings and tones of a text can be interpreted in many ways even for the silliest stuff. This is the perfect time to do this while engaged and before baby arrives. There will always be arguments and misunderstandings. Always communicate! Wait to cool off if needed and take turns talking.

Glow360 · February 2016

Texting while hormonal is a bad idea. Texting can cause miscommunications. Try making a rule and talk to each other face to face. Give your man the benefit of the doubt and start again. I know I'm super emotional, crabby and extra sensitive right now too thanks to hormones. Hope your able to rest and communication leads to a positive outcome.

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